Last Month's Review.

What is The Terminator?: The Terminator was from an illness-induced dream director James Cameron (predecessing Terminator movies, The Abyss, Titanic, Aliens) had about a robot rising from some flaming wreckage- the Terminator robots as a matter of fact. He originally wanted a kind of sneaking thing, but instead went for a giant unstoppable killing machine- thanks to a meeting with Arnold Schwarzenegger, a rising star of movies like Conan The Barbarian, and bodybuilding documentary film 'Pumping Iron', and his preference of rather being the Terminator than the hero character, Kyle Reese- which finally went to Michael Biehn (Aliens, Megiddo: Omega Code 2....no, I never heard of that movie either). It involves a world where, after most of the major population centres on Earth are destroyed by nuclear explosions- Judgement Day - by a new self-aware super computer processor called Skynet, developed by a computer company called Cyberdyne Systems. Humans were rounded up and made to work to death or be killed- until a man called John Connor taught the humans how to fight for survival...and finally win over Skynet and its many mechanical protectors- giant skyscraper sized tanks, large hovercraft jets and armies upon armies of cyborgs- whether in their robot form or in perfect living tissue human disguises.

But Skynet's smarter than we think- it sent back one of these human cyborgs (Arnold Schwarzenegger)  into time, to before John Connor was born, to kill his mother, Sarah Connor (Linda Hamilton), so John Connor isn't born and it claims victory over humans. But humans are smarter than we think too, John Connor sends a volunteer recruit, the aforementioned Kyle Reese, back in time to protect Sarah Connor from the Terminator. Without luck in killing Sarah Connor, Skynet sent back a new T-1000, a shapeshifting Terminator made purely of liquid metal that could make blades from his body and is harder to damage than the old cyborg Terminators, to kill John Connor as a pre-teen- while John Connor in the future reprogrammed a cyborg (Arnie again) and sent that back in time to protect the pre-teen John Connor.

After that, the company that made the Terminator movies, Carolco, went under and bankrupt and lost the rights to make future Terminator movies. It was only until recently when the guys behind Carolco, Andrew Vajna and Mario Kassar, bought back the rights to make more Terminator movies and started a new film studio, C2 Pictures, and went to work on a new Terminator movie. But it seemed wrought with problems as most of the original cast members, including the original director, refused or weren't allowed back onto the movie. Linda Hamilton was planned to appear in the trailers, but she pulled out on reasons that she didn't like the script. James Cameron, the original director, didn't want to make it because he wasn't interested in working on someone else's script in a movie world he created, Robert Patrick-The T-1000- decided to stick with Charlies Angels: Full Throttle, and Michael Biehn didn't take part cos James Cameron wasn't working on it. While Edward Furlong, the prepubescent 12-year old John Connor in Terminator 2: Judgement Day, wasn't allowed back because of drug problems.

But finally, after a few re-casts, eliminations, CGI, make-up and story tweaks later, Terminator 3: Rise of The Machines is finally out in cinemas across the Americas, Europe and the rest of the world. But what's the story within the movie?

STORY IN A NUTSHELL: The TX, the latest edition of the Terminator from Skynet, is sent back in time to stalk John Connor and his future lieutenants in modern-day Los Angeles. Connor is protected only by a familiar T-101 model Terminator- whose mission is to keep John Connor alive on the day when the Skynet system is due to become active and begin its attack on humanity.

THE MOVIE:
(warning: may contain spoilers).
Well, the movie is good enough. Definitely the best movie of Arnie's later career so far. Claire Danes plays a solid role as love-interest Kate Brewster, Kristianna Loken is rather intimidating despite her sexy looks as the TX (especially in the scene where she 'takes care' of a few people with her many changing appendages), and Arnie plays a more rough, tough Terminator than the friendly one of Terminator 2. But my problem personally is with Nick Stahl's John Connor- he's gone from Edward Furlong's bad boy into a nerdy, neurotic drug-taking melancholic. His fate may be getting to him, and he may now be a drifter, but still- it shouldn't have taken away John Connor's punkish steel. But then, in this movie, a whole lot has changed since the days of Terminator 2- though it is said the drug taking scene (John Connor breaks into Kate Brewster's animal hospital and steals some pills) is a rather cruel injoke towards Edward Furlong and his descent into it.

The overall movie though, despite a surprising and pessimistic ending when Judgement Day does take place, is more of an action fest than an intellectual and emotional venture. The scene where John Connor is chased down the streets of LA by a fire truck driven by the TX, along with 2 police cars and an ambulance controlled by her, is a fantastic display of action- as is the gunfight in the cemetary where we once again say hello to the other re-occuring character of the Terminator series, Dr Silberman (may have seen him be taken hostage by Linda Hamilton in Terminator 2), not to mention the battle against the prototype terminators as Cyber SYSTEMS corporation. That's right! not Cyberdyne, but Cyber Systems! Just one of the many confusing parts of the Terminator 3 storyline.

Terminator 3 is a worthy addition to the Terminator series- it manages to defy the dreading aura of box-office bombing that the odds against it showed, but it's not the best of the Terminator movies. It's just a good movie to pass 2 hours or so.

What is Pirates Of The Caribbean?: And no, that's not a typo. Pirates of the Caribbean is the latest Jerry Bruckheimer (producer of such hits as Top Gun, Flashdance, Coyote Ugly, Beverly Hills Cop, The Rock, Con Air and CSI: Crime Scene Investigation) and Disney offering. Yes, it's a Disney movie with a rating above G (or U for English readers). The original Pirates Of The Caribbean is a rather dull 11-minute ride at Disneyland- spouting out 'A Pirate's Life for Me' on a stereo system, seeing prisoners hold out bones and food to entice a mangy mutt holding the jail keys to come over, the drunken port of Tortuga and a gift shop selling food, candy and souvenirs at reasonable prices ^^

The movie was made in an aim to bring back the pirate movie genre from the briny deeps of Davy Jones's Hollywood locker (but leaving Cutthroat Island to remain there). It was an ambitious project to say the least. First off, the pirate movie genre has faltered over the past 10 years, with movies like Cutthroat Island and Muppet Treasure Island. Second, British leads Orlando Bloom and Keira Knightley are relatively new. Orlando Bloom had so far, 2 hits to his resume, the Lord Of The Rings: The Fellowship Of The Ring and The Two Towers- but he wasn't really a lead character in those movies, more of a sidekick in his role of Legolas. While Keira Knightley, with relative success in British movie 'Bend It Like Beckham', wasn't the biggest name on the bill. But with solid lead star Johnny Depp and Oscar-winner Geoffrey Rush as supporting actors, not to mention the large amounts of budget cash to be provided by Disney as well as the skills of director Gore Verbinski, screenwriters Ted Elliot and Terry Rossio (they wrote Shrek!) and the productive skills of Jerry Bruckheimer, this movie managed to be the top live-action movie of the summer.

That, or perhaps people found Keira Knightley/Orlando Bloom too alluring to resist

But less talk, more review!

MOVIE IN A NUTSHELL: The crewmembers of the ship, The Black Pearl, are under an Aztec curse for stealing their gold- their bodies, though appear well and alive in the day and night, become skeletons under the glow of the moonlight. No food can satisfy their hunger, no drink can satisfy their thirst, nor any woman their lust. The only way for them to lift this curse is to return all the Aztec treasures back where they found them, but the last remaining piece of treasure hangs on the necklace of the lovely Elizabeth Swann, daughter of the British Governor. When she is kidnapped, it is up to young blacksmith Will Turner, and the mysterious, brain addled pirate Captain Jack Sparrow to rescue her from the clutches of the cursed crew and their captain, Barbossa.

THE MOVIE:
This movie covers all aspects that keep an audience thrilled at an even level- romance, adventure and comedy. Tales of pirate lore, cursed treasure, secret identities and acts of betrayal and derring-do hit the spot perfectly, keeping the pace up perfectly in time for the final showdown against Geoffrey Rush's Barbossa and his crew of cursed pirates aboard the The Black Pearl.
Orlando Bloom, Keira Knightley and the aforementioned Rush provide solid characters and personalities, but the real star of this movie is within Johnny Depp's Jack Sparrow- crossing the drug-addled slurrings of Rolling Stones' Keith Richards, and skunk lothario Pepé Le Pew. His actions, movement and speech provides a masterclass in comedy acting, especially within scenes such as when the Commander of the British forces tells him that he is the worst pirate he's ever heard of, but Jack cunningly replies 'but you have heard of me'. Not to mention scenes prior where he confuses 2 guards, saves Keira from drowning, takes Keira hostage to provide his getaway, and then steals the best ship of the Royal Navy to go on the search for Keira along with Orlando Bloom's Will Turner.....and this is just his actions early in the movie!

The CGI of the skeletal figures of the Black Pearl crew is beautifully done, especially in perhaps the big money moment amongst the rabble- where Barbossa slowly leaves his cabin and into the moonlight- slowly changing into a skeleton himself. He tells Keira 'you best start believing in ghost stories, you're in one!' before taking a giant swig of rum and seeing it spill from his ribs. This sinister turn provides a pleasant shiver to the proceedings, being scary without sending kids shrieking from the cinema screen room. Not to mention the cameo hints from the Pirates Of The Caribbean ride itself- including the port of Tortuga and the prisoners trying to entice the dog with the jail keys. But luckily, you probably wouldn't have to wait 45 minutes in a queue to get tickets to this movie.

This is a movie that prides itself on its lively detail and top-notch craftmanship, but doesn't take itself too seriously. A lesson most other movies should learn: the audience aren't forced into the feeling of having fun, but are having fun because the movie is fun as well.

Leaving Note: Little fact before I sign off until next month: Disney left their logo off this movie so as not to influence audiences into thinking this was more friendly, numb-fluff that the people behind Mickey Mouse are so well-know for.