<<I see a shadow every day and night.
I walk a hundred streets of neon lights,
Only when I'm crying.
Can you hear me crying.>>

Wind rustled through an opened window on the second floor of a small bookstore. A old building nestled between others from the olden turn of the century from long ago and ancient New York. A wispy thin figure sat nestled in the corner of the window box, a book lay open upon his lap, the wind rustling the pages. The reader had long forgotten the words in the binding and seemed lost in thoughts from long ago. Black silk slid across the boys face, ebony eyes distant, reflecting a hard life... and infinite sadness.

Long and graceful fingers slipped strands of black hair behind his ears. He hated these nights. He use to go for long walks in the dusk, under the darkening skies, then wander through the lights of New York City, till he finally ended up back at his small store in the village. It was the last place he ever expected to be... they would ever expect him to be. He missed them, for it was worth. Missed them... missed him.

The most perfect thing he would never be worthy of... never should have even hoped. It was the hope that made him fall in the first place. His heart beat faster at every smile. His mind stop ranting for a moment in his wake. "Duo..." his lips whispered.

The boy that meant more than life to him. Duo made his life move on through the war... he just wished it was him on the receiving end of Duo's affection. No, Duo had always chose Heero. For what reason, it had eluded Wufei for years. He could never understand why Duo loved the pilot who used him for sex. Didn't Heero ever realize the wonder he had doting on his every step!? No... he never did. Besides Heero was more perfect than he would ever be. Who could love a failure?

He had ran after the war. He was seventeen and very confused... he headed to the last place they would ever look, like they would ever look for him. He doubted they ever noticed he was gone. Though he had hoped that maybe once before they died they would ask, "what ever happened to Wufei?" but he doubted it. He had to escape, it was like learning to live without breathing... living with out being by Duo was the hardest thing for him... and still was.

He had fallen hard... so hard. He wanted nothing more than to be held by that braided beauty. To hear his voice... his name sounded so perfect coming from an angel's lips...

Then he finally gave in... one tear slid down his cheek and landed on his hand, rolling onto the worn book. That gave way to a cascade of pain... and finally... he gave into his sobs...

<<So many times you always wanted more,
Chasing illusions that you're longing for.
Wish I wasn't crying.
Can you hear me crying.>>

Duo sat in his loft. He was suppose to be happy. Everybody had him pegged as happy. Why shouldn't he be happy? He had Heero didn't he? Well, on the weekends... to think Heero believed he was hiding his affair with Relena. Duo knew Yuy was jerking off with Miss Queen of the World, practically nightly.

Heero wouldn't know till tomorrow that Duo had called him at the meeting to find his "husband" wasn't as the meeting, that the number had been Relena's secretary. Or more accurately the same secretary Relena used. Rather odd, he thought, secretaries usually have enough to with one person, nope she seemed fine with two.

Or maybe it was the fact Heero was working for her and never told him that gave it away. Duo was seething again. He had to be better looking then Relena. Hell, he knew he was better looking than Relena, whistles and cheers alone told him that. So how he still had to fight for Heero...?

"Cause that baka knows he'll get it no matter what..." Duo answered himself. How long had he been honest with himself and he still craved that bastards attention. Why was there a void? A huge gaping emptiness that would constantly claw at his heart?

Duo slammed down the picture of him and Heero. He didn't want to think about that idiot... which itself was a large problem. He turned over and eyed the desk draw. It wouldn't be so hard would it? It would end things so...so quickly. It would be easy for Heero then... it would make himself look like the street rat he always had been...

But could he possibly do it?

With a heavy sigh he pushed himself off the bed. Slow strides took him to the desk and with hands shaking he opened the drawer. Coolness ran over his palms as he used his other hands to turn on the light, he needed to see.

He ran his eyes over and over the words, they were blurring over with tears... why? Why was it sooo hard to let go?!? "Now or never..." he muttered and pulled out a piece of paper and pen. He began to quickly write his reasons to Heero, hoping there would be some guilt involved on the other parties part... but he was just handing Heero over, wasn't he?

But living with no escape from that bitch would suffice for now, he could always get back at Heero by falling in love for real and sending him a wedding invitation... he finished scrawling his memo to Heero, glad that they kept separate accounts and that Heero could never touch his.

He smile widened and he whipped out the pen and signed the divorce papers. He could let his lawyers handle the rest. And glancing over the room, he grabbed a few more personal belongings and left. He was going to ignore those tears in his eyes...

<<There's an ocean between us.
You know where to find me.
You reach out and touch me.
I feel you in my own heart.
More than a lifetime.
Still goes on forever.
But it helps to remember
You're only an ocean away.>>

Wufei smiled as summer gave way into fall, Quatre had wandered in yesterday with Trowa joining up later. His mood was picking up, though he was still mourning his unspoken love, that was reserved for the nights. Quatre did not need to worry about him.

It was strange seeing the radiant blonde walk into his store. Quatre nearly exploded with happiness and shock and took Wufei down in a tackling hug which Wufei could only return. Quatre was amazed at seeing Wufei and they chatted as Wufei closed the store early and the rested upon the mountains of books waiting for Trowa to come by.

Trowa was still amazingly tall, and Wufei was thrilled that Quatre was only a few inches taller than him, not making him feel so tiny, as he often felt around others. Trowa smiled at seeing them, though more than a little shocked, and they mercilessly dragged Wufei with them the entire day. In and out of stores, demanding phone numbers and talking about this and that... Wufei smiled at the memory.

He turned his eyes to the bulletin board with the few numbers and clippings he had. Heero was getting married, and shockingly not invited any of them. Not that Wufei minded, he didn't see why he would be wanted, but he still felt it was rude. And his mind was jumping with elation as Quatre forwarded a number to him...

He had Duo's number. Duo had moved to Italy, after he had left Heero. Duo had left Heero. His heart had begun to lift...

He was now smiling and feeling happier so easily... Duo was only an ocean away... those numbers could connect him... but...

"Why would he want to speak to me? I only talked to him a few times, and even then Heero was latched onto him and vice versa... not fun to talk with someone when a third party is over reading into every word you utter..." he thought out loud.

But for now he was content with his memories and the mere thought he lived on the same planet as his love... his soul mate...

And as the sunset he glanced at the phone, biting his lip... he would call... soon. He promised himself and Quatre that he would call, and he never broke his word, not to Quatre... it wouldn't... it wouldn't be honorable...

<<Was there a moment when I felt no pain.
I want to feel it in my life again.
Let it be over now.
'Cause I remember all the days and nights
We used to walk the streets of neon lights
Oh I want you here with me.
Oh be here with me.>>

Duo sighed looking out the window... Winter had left and spring was erupting all over Italy... it was beautiful... birds and people... the bustling along the waterways, the light reflecting playful kissing the water... he was depressed.

Wufei had called months ago. The last person he wanted calling...and he wasn't even there to take the message!! And he tried... but he couldn't even get the nerve to call the boy back. At that alone he was an ass... Wufei didn't want to hear from him now...

He was trying to convince himself that it was a casual call, that his hyper-active imagination wanted to hint it was more. He would like it if it was more... looking across his clustered desk he let his eyes glaze over at the announcement of Relena and Heero marring... they didn't invite him.

That had hurt. He didn't even get to see the others... or Wufei. So, he had time to think and realized the boy with the raven hair had been right all along. Heero used him for sex. Nothing more and nothing less... and he let himself be used once again.

Sure, he had a good sized corporation, he had wealth... but were was it different than growing up? he still was being used... and he still wanted something... someone... Wufei.

Wufei only lived an ocean away... one large huge ocean of hateful waters. Cold and dangerous... though according to his sources Wufei was living in New York... his city. He loved New York...it reminded him of home.

They used to walk through the neon streets at night, together and chat. It was one of the few memories of the war he didn't mind remembering...just him and Wufei and a million stars and signs and people... Wufei with his rare smiles, drinking in the amazing lights of L2...

Duo remembered Wufei had commented how it was so different from his colony. Even after he had lost it, the neon glow seemed to always bring out the dreamer in him... Something about the city... He would talk to Wufei about New York when they were given those spare moments of rare solitude with the other. Wufei's eyes soaking in his words like... like only a dreamer could.

The lights that filled those sad ebony eyes always gave him a thrill... and a chill and a desire... to pull the boy close... and hold him and kiss him... then reality would drive those nice dreams away... Wufei didn't like him like that. He knew it without even asking. They were friends...

And friends could fly out to New York for... a book. Wufei owned a world known bookstore... it was as good a reason as any...

<<There's an ocean between us.
You know where to find me.
You reach out and touch me.
I feel you in my own heart.
More than a lifetime
Still goes on forever.
But it helps to remember
You're only an ocean away.>>

Duo stood in front of a store in the Village. "I can't believe of all places he would live in the village..." he muttered just staring at the sign...

Wufei noticed a tall man just looking at his sign and a piece of paper... "Wonder if he is lost...?" business was always slow around this time... he pushed himself away from the counter... the man was still there, auburn hair filtering in the breeze... it was loose and tucked behind his ears...

Duo blinked as he noticed large ebony blinking at him, "Can I help you?" the eyes master asked.

Duo looked down, Wufei was tiny! Barely reaching him at mid chest level. "Wufei?" he asked not even sure of his own voice... the beautiful and exotic boy was sooo close, yet felt an ocean away...

Wufei blinked... and blinked and then eyes slowly widened, "Duo?" the word was whispered... he didn't think... it couldn't possibly be...

"Heya Wufei..." the response came from Duo. He knew it was dread to follow.

"What did you do to your hair?!?!" Wufei yelled finally connecting the two.

"What?!" Duo was put-off, he had not been expecting that but Wufei moved closer and fingered the beautiful hair that he once only knew in a braid, "You chopped it!!!" Wufei cried in surprise.

Duo laughed and pulled Wufei back into the store, "And you haven't changed a bit, beautiful store..."

"Your hair..." Wufei was stuck in shock. His Duo had chopped his beautiful mane... he still looked drop-dead perfect, but it was shocking to the poor boy.

Duo smiled wider, it was much better than he hoped... Wu didn't hate him, looking around and noticing no one there, "Can I take you out for a late lunch, please? No one is here, and you really can close for the day right?"

Wufei smiled, and replied, "Sure..."

<<So many times you always wanted more,
Chasing illusions that you're longing for.
Wish I wasn't crying.
Can you hear me crying.>>

Duo and Wufei watch the day slip away like summer... Lunch gave way to a walk through the Village to Central Park, to the uptown stores to dinner, to a walk along the busy streets of Times Square...

"Um... how was the wedding?" Duo asked out of the blue breaking the silence as the neared Wufei's shop again after being gone all day.

Wufei scowled, "Heero didn't invite any of us... not even Quatre. You should have seen his face, oh Quatre was pissed."

Duo stopped, "You mean Heero alienated all of you too?"

Wufei quirked an eyebrow, "he always did."

Duo stopped and in a sudden calm turned back to Wufei, "What would you do if I kissed you and told you I loved you?"

Wufei stopped, and felt his body shut down as violet eyes stole his and lips captured his in a passionate embrace...

Duo sadly pulled back, needing air and bracing himself for the beating of his life until nothing came. He slowly opened one eye to see Wufei blinking in disbelief.

"Why?" Wufei asked silently. "why did you...I could have gone my entire life with out that... and now you do that and now you are going to leave me, right?"

Duo stopped thinking and pushed Wufei into the wall, "I will never leave you of you don't want me too. I love you..."

Wufei sighed, "I... I... love you too..."

Duo smiled and kissed the smaller boy again, after all the night was young, and that ocean that had swelled between them... well it started to melt away with each touch and kiss... and nothing was going to separate them ever again...

<<Only an ocean away.>>

* * * *

Sung by: Sarah Brightman
1996 Eden album.