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Sasami Springer
Crowd: SASAMI! SASAMI! SASAMI! Sasami: Hello, Thank you very much. Welcome to The Sasami Springer Show. Today's topic, "Bizarre Love Triangles." Lets welcome our first guest. He is a average school boy who is in a relationship with his girlfriend Ryoko. Say hello to Tenchi Masaki! Crowd: YEAH, WE LOVE YOU SASAMI Sasami: Hello Tenchi Tenchi: Hey Sasami Sasami: so, how long have you been dating Ryoko. Tenchi: Well, we have been dating for about 5 years now. Sasami: Wow, sounds like a solid relationship Tenchi: Well, it isn't Crowd: OOOOOOOH!!! Sasami: Care to explain why? Tenchi: Well, I've been seeing another woman Crowd: AWWWWWW, SASAMI SASAMI SASAMI........ Sasami: So, you came here tonight to tell your girlfriend this. Tenchi: That's correct Jerry. Sasami: My name is Sasami, not Jerry you retard. Tenchi: sorry Sasami: well lets bring her out anyway, Meet Ryoko Crowd: Whoa!!! She's Hot!!! Sasami: welcome to the show Ryoko Ryoko: Hello Jerry Sasami: WHAT THE F***, DO I LOOK LIKE JERRY Ryoko: sorry Sasami: That doesn't matter what does is the fact that tenchi has something to say to you. Tenchi: Ryoko, you know I love you right? Ryoko: ye-yeah Tenchi: well, I hate to say this but I've been seeing someone else. Crowd: OHHHHHHHHHH!!!! JERRY JERRY JERRY! Sasami: IM SASAMI not JERRY! Ryoko: WHAT THE F*** YOU MEAN YOU SEEIN' SOMEONE ELSE. Who be dis' hussy. Tenchi: ....... it's Ayeka Crowd: OHHHHHHH Ryoko: WHAT!!!! YOU SICK LITTLE F***!!! She's your Great Aunt!!! Crowd: GROSS, YOU SICK LITTLE S*** Sasami: Let's bring her out. Crowd: BOOOOO!!!!!! Ayeka: OH Boo you!!! You don't know me! You don't know me! YOU DON'T KNOW ME!!! *Tenchi and Ayeka do a serious kiss and Ryoko comes over and tries to break them up* Crowd: STEVE STEVE STEVE ........... *Steve breaks it up* Ryoko: How could you do this to me? Tenchi: You were never there for me Crowd: BOOOOO Tenchi talking over the crowd: You were- You were never- NEVER THERE *Ayeka and Ryoko get in a big cat fight and steve tries to break it up. however, Ryoko makes an Energy Sword and cuts his head off. Half the crowd empties out the back door screaming for their lives.* Ayeka: You want some of me, YOU WANT SOME OF THIS. You best back off, I'm bearing a Child of Tenchi The Remaining Crowd: OHHHHHHH!!!! Sasami: and now for my Final Thought. We learned a lot today. but I think everything can be summed up into one sentence: MY NAME IS SASAMI NOT JERRY, IF YOU CALL ME JERRY YOU WILL DIE. Thanks for coming..... oh yea! And if you are a child molesting fat octopus man from outer space and would like to be on the show, please call 1-800-96- JERRY
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