Silliness2:The Sequel(bum bum bum!!)

JOKE

Q:How many Ronin Warriors does it take to change a light bulb?

Jeopardy song plays...

A: Five. One to doubt the mission's success, one to say, "We need to come up with a plan!", one to make idle threats and stupid comments, one to say, "We have to work together!", and one to call Anubis and his staff to do it for them.
 

@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@
 

WHAT IF...ACT 7
What if each of the Ronins lost a sense?...
 

Sage is making breakfast. Kento is looking at his food funny and making shifty eyes at Chef Sage. Ryo is on the phone, but just looking at it. Cye is reading the paper.

Sage:"Ryo, go wake Rowen up."

Ryo:"What?"

Sage:"I said, go wake Rowen up!"

Ryo:"What?"

Sage:"GO...WAKE...RO...UP!!"

Ryo:"What?"

Kento:"Oh forget it! I'll go get him up!"

**************

Rowen falls down the stairs and lays still in a heap at the bottom.

Sage turns from the oven.

Sage:"Ryo, go pick Rowen up."

Ryo:"What?"

Kento lifts Rowen into a chair and continues eating.

Rowen:"What's cooking?"

Ryo:"What?"

Kento:"Sage is..."

Rowen: Ryo:"What?"

Cye nods to Sage.

Sage sees his arm is on fire.

Sage:"Oh. I hadn't noticed."

He puts out the fire and continues to cook.

Kento:"This tastes funny...It doesn't have a taste. Here, tell me what you think."

Kento puts the fork in front of Rowen's face.

Rowen leans in and the fork goes up his nose.

Rowen:"Ow! What'dja do that for!?"

Ryo:"What?"

Rowen:"Why don't you turn some lights on?"

Kento:"They are on. Let's just go outside and eat."

Sage:"Yeah, like a picnic."

Ryo:"What?"

Cye nods to Sage.

Sage's leg is on fire. (and they say Rowen doesn't know how to cook...)

Sage puts the fire out and goes outside with a plate of food.

Rowen:"Excuse me..."

Kento:"What's the major malfunction? Let's go!"

Ryo:"What?"

Rowen:"Hello! I'm blind! I can't see where I'm going!"

Kento:"So. Cye's mute but you don't hear him complaining."

Cye looks at Kento.

Kento:"What?"

Ryo:"What?"

There is a crash outside.

Rowen:"What?"

Sage:"I fell off the porch!"

Kale:"No, you were pushed off."

Sage:"Really? By whom?"

Kayura pops up in Kento's face.

Kayura:"Now he did say he was blind, right?"

Cye nods to Kayura.

Kayura does her Tarzan yell and whisks Rowen away.

Rowen:"Who is this? Where are we going!?"

Ryo:"What?"

Kale and Dais are using Sage as a soccer ball, but he doesn't know it.

Kento is eating everything.

Kento:"Hm...that's gone bad too. No flavor."

The phone rings.

Cye picks it up and nods to the reciever.

Ryo:"What?"
 

@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@
 

WHAT IF...ACT 8
What if they were all Sesame Street Characters?...

Rowen's Girl:"ATTENTION! MANY THANKS  TO SHANNA FOR HELPING ME OUT. WITHOUT HER, THERE WOULD BE NO RANCID FOOD FIGHT! ^-^ ::waves hello to Shannannanna::
 
 

A little orange guy with black hair and a striped shirt walks in.

Cye:"RG! Sekhmet is throwing stuff at me again!"

A green moldy thing in a garbage can hops loudly into the kitchen.

Sekhmet:"Uh-uh!"

He reaches in the can and pulls out a banana peel and throws it at Cye.

Rowen's Girl:"Where is Dais?"

A yellow monobrow with black hair and a striped shirt walks in.

Dais:"I don't wanna be Cye's friend..."

Dais crosses his arms and pouts.

The blue thing with wobbly eyes at the other end of the kitchen turns.

Kento:"These cholocate chip ones are my fave! Hey,...what's that noise?"

A glass of water on the table begin to ripple as a tremor in the ground becomes stronger.

Finally a red furred wooly mamoth enters the room.

Anubis:"AAAHHH!!"

He runs around the table and back out the door as White Blaze tries to take him down.

Sekhmet throws a can at White Blaze.

Ryo:"Hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha!! Make him hahahaha stop!!"

Little red Ryo runs around the room laughing while Sage tickles him with one of his yellow feathers.

Sage:"You have to let me tickle you! It's in your name!"

Kale sits down at the table wearing a long cape and starts pointing at the occupants of the room.

Kale:"One. One dork. Two. Two dorks. Three. Three dorks..."

A tall blue furred thing enters the room and sits beside Kale.

Kale turns to him and points.

Kale:"Four..."

Kayura walks over, inspecting Rowen.

Kayura:"Oooo. He's so fuzzy!!"

The kitchen door swings open.

Anubis:"AAAAAAHH!!"

Kale:"Seven. Seven dorks. Eight..."

Kale turns to RG and points.

RG is forced to break Kale's finger.

Rowen's Girl:"Nine. Nine fingers left."

Sekhmet reaches in his can and throws a fish skeleton at Cye who faints.

~~~~~~~~~~

Rowen's Girl:"My appologies if you were totally lost. Here are the credits. (^.^* I have failed...::sniff:: WAAAAHHHH!! I couldn't even come up with a lousy plot!!)

@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@
 

WHAT IF...ACT 9
What if Kayura and RG fought over Rowen?...

Rowen's Girl:"I must say, that this idea was entirely Shanna'sand Druggie Bear's, and I'm grateful to them for this cutie! Sorry if you think it sucks, but since it wasn't my idea, I had to rack my brain to make it longer than, 'I'd kick her ass!'"
 
 

Kayura:"He's mine! I saw him first!"

Rowen's Girl:"Yeah, you saw him first! You also tried to kill him first! I only started that recently!"

Crowd:"Oooooo!"

Kayura:"Well you don't own him!"

Rowen's Girl:"At least I don't have to wait until he's unconcios to get him alone!"

Crowd:"Oooooo!"

Kayura gives the evil eye and RG returns it.

Kayura:"You *****!"

Jerry:"Whoa! What do you say to that, RG?"

RG picks up a chair and swings it overhead.

Kayura rips the microphone from the host's hands and swings it like nunchucks.

Crowd:"JERRY! JERRY! JERRY!"

Kayura:"How long has this been going on!?"

::BANG::

::CRACK::

Rowen's Girl:"Nothing is going on yet with me, but nothing is ever going to go on with you!"

::BANG::

::CRACK::

Kayura:"I've known him longer. Anyway, you're the one who keeps hurting him! He'd have to be crazy to like you!!"

Rowen's Girl:"That's it! My next story you're goin' bald!"

There is a war cry and Rowen jumps on stage swinging a techie like a bat and knocks Jerry out.

******************

Kento:"I love this show! Pass the chips, Cye."

Cye:"Awfully violent, though...Where are the secrity guards? They're NOT doing their job..."

TV:"JERRY! JERRY! JERRY!"

~~~~~~~~~~
 

Rowen's Girl:"I wanted to win, but in real life, Kayura would kill me so I was generous...sort of."

Drunky:"Who won? Oh! Jerry! Jerry! Jerry! Jer-buuurp!"

Cye:"Those security guards should be fired..."
 

@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@
 

WHAT IF...ACT 10
What if there was a REAL Ronin Warrior Sailor Moon crossover?...
 

City streets, a bad guy is destroying buildings.

Five figures appear, cloaked in shadows.

Cye:"Hold it right there!"

Baddie:"What? Who's there? Show yourself!" (Baddie...oh I am so creative)

Cye:"...um...no."

Kento:"Oh for Pete's sake!"

Kento jumps out into the light dressed as Sailor Venus.

Baddie stares for a second.

Baddie:"Muahahahahaha!!!!"

Kento:"Shut up! I look fantastic!"

Cye:"That's why I'm hiding..."

Ryo:"C'mon, guys, uh...yeah, guys! Let's do it!"

Ryo rushes out dressed as Sailor Mars.

Ryo:"OW!! I twisted my ankle! Who's crummy idea was it to fight in high heels anyway!?"

Kento:"Sailor Sage, you wanna come out here?"

Sage steps into the light as Sailor Jupiter.

Kento:"Uh, Sailor Sage?"

Sage is admiring his legs.

Sage:"...so soft..."

Cye gags in the shadows.

Baddie:"Teehee!!"

Ryo:"In the name of the moon-"

Rowen:"That's my line!"

Ryo:"Huff! Well then get out here and say it!"

Rowen:"...donwanna..."

Ryo:"Now! Or in the name of Mars, I shall whip up on you!"

Rowen stalks out as Sailor Moon.

Rowen:"inthenameofthemoonishallpunishyou. HAPPY NOW!?"

Kento:"Use the stick!"

Cye:"It's a scepter, Sailor Kento."

Rowen pouts as he stomps over to Baddie and beats him over the head with the wand.

Cye:"THAT'S NOT HOW YOU USE IT!!"

Rowen:"Then you get out here and do it, Sailor Cye!"

Cye meekly steps out as Sailor Mercury.

He runs over, mindful of the short skirt, and kicks Baddie in the shin, then runs back to the shadows.

Kento:"Oh yeah. That's gonna do it..."

Sage:"...so long..."

Ryo:"Will someone carry me home?"

Rowen:"I bet that meatball head breaks my bow..."

Kento:"What are you guys complaining about!? We're thin!!"

Cye:"I was always thin..."

Sage:"...so-I agree. Kento makes a much more attractive girl."

Kento:"Those soft and long legs had better carry you fast, lightning boy!"

Ryo:"Guys, I'm serious! My ankle really hurts!"

Rowen:"You guys are aware that Baddie is destroying the city?"

Kayura bounds in.

Kayura:"I'll stop him with my deadly...um...roses?"

Cye:"Hahahahaha!!!"

Tuxedo Kayura throws a rose at Cye and knocks him out.

Kayura then looks at Sailor Rowen and bursts into tears.

Kento has passed out from running and Sage walks calmly over, rubbing his legs lightly.

Sage:"...so pretty...You know, Tuxedo Kayura, you are overlooking something."

Kayura looks up and stops crying.

Kayura:"You're right! He may be in a skirt, but I'm in a suit! It could still work!! YEEEEHAAAAAW!"

Rowen has time to flip Sage the bird before Kayura whisks him away.

Kento crawls over gasping and collapses beside Sage.

Sage:"My bologna has a first name. It's K-E-N-T-O."

Kento:"Grrrrrrr!!!! AAAAHH!!"

Kento chases Sage as he leaps like a deer around pieces of broken building.

Ryo:"Guuuuuys! I wanna go hoooooome!"

Five armored figures appear and promptly topple over.

Mina:"Ow!"

Raye:"I think I landed on your stick!"

Cye:"It's a yari!"

A voice cuts in over the distance.

Rowen:"She broke my bow! I knew she would!!"

Lita:"Quit manhandling my legs, you creep!"

Sage:"...so smooth..."
 

~~~~~~~~~~

Rowen's girl:"I am so sorry. I was soooo tired and this turned out sooooo long." ^-^*

Drunky:"Can I touch your legs?"

Sage:"No way! You'll just hurl on them!"

Drunky:"...so tan..."

Talpa:"You mean all I had to do was put them in skirts!?" O_o

Drunky:"Maybe if they keep it up, Baddie will laugh himself to death."

Rowen's Girl:"Or if they're lucky, he'll be crushed by a low flying Mercedes Benz."
 

@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@
 
 

Things never to say to a ronin...

Cye
Stick a fork in me, i'm done!
Seafood platter?
Aren't you one of the Beetles?
Aren't you the weak Ronin?
Wanna go fishing?

Sage
Is that natural?
When's the last time you got a haircut?
Can you see me?

Rowen
Is that natural?
Wanna play William Tell?
What happens when you gotta take a leak when you're in space?

Kento
Slim Fast?
Could you help me find my twinkies?
My God, man! How much do you weigh!?
How much of that is really muscle?
Have you ever broken a chair?
Oh, an all you can eat food bar...pshyce!
Hey look! It's the fat one!

Ryo
Gee, if I were leader,  I wouldn't have done that...
Hey, isn't that Mia flirting with that cute guy?
White Blaze? That's a stupid name for a tiger...
I bet that slap scars Yulie for life.

Anubis
What's it like being dead?
Can you get me in touch with my great grandma?
You know...you kinda look like a chic...
Can you make the walls bleed?
Where are your chains?
Tell me again...how did you die?

Dais
Can you see me?
If you need glasses, do you get half off?
You look an awful lot like a pirate...
Ew, gross! A spider! Quick, somebody squish it!
Do you sleep hanging upside down?

Kale
Do you ever chase cats up trees?
Do you have fleas?
Do you howl at the moon?
Should I turn my head when we pass a fire hydrant?
Do you ever lick yourself when no one's watching?
Kibbles n' Bits?

Sekhmet
Do you ever shed?
Ordeaurves? A white mouse, perhaps...
Do that tongue thing.

Kayura
So what grade are you in?
How do you get dates with the body of a twelve year old?

~~~~~~~~~~

Rowen's Girl:"Now, you could say this stuff...

Drunky:"But you'd be dead in two seconds flat."

@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@