Cat Fist Fury



Standard disclaimer is in effect.



<>: Thoughts



                                  Chapter 6



                                Aloha Furinkan



     Ranma was the subject of much backslapping and adoration 

when he arrived at school the morning after the tournament. 

     "Way to go Cojiro!"

     "You were totally awesome!"

     "You really put that stuck-up snob Kuno in his place!"

     "You totally rock!"

     Ranma was a little more than embarrassed at all the attention 

that he was getting, but he smiled back at his admirers as he went 

to his first class.

     Sometime later, Ranma decided to visit his new friends at the 

gymnasium. Fortunately, they had recovered enough from the 

previous day to attend school. As he entered the building, which 

was still undergoing repairs, due to the damage caused by the 

tournament, he was warmly greeted by his teammates.

     "Hey Cojiro! Over here!" Shang said from a corner. Ranma 

looked over and frowned as he saw that the Chinese boy's right 

arm was in a sling. As he walked over to him, he was approached 

by the other members of Himoto's fighting team.

     "Hey buddy!" Sakoto said. "Way to go! You really cleaned 

Furinkan's clock yesterday!"

     "Aw, it was nothing. You guys did pretty good, considering who 

you went up against."

     "Thanks for the flattery, but we all know who pulled Himoto's 

fat out of the fire yesterday." Sodan said. He had a small bandage 

on his forehead, where Kuno's bokken had struck him. "We got to 

admit, that Ultimate Neko Ken was pretty impressive."

     "How do you know?" Ranma asked. "You guys weren't there."

     "No, but Kai was in the crowds with a camcorder. He showed us 

the tape of you in action. Right now, he's probably selling clips to 

people. I swear, he's just about as bad as Nabiki."

     "Who's Nabiki?"

     "Nabiki Tendo, the Ice Queen of Furinkan. She's the older 

sister of Akane and she's what you would call a mercenary."

     "Mercenary?"

     "Uh huh. I know about her because I used to go to Furinkan. 

She's into blackmail, extortion and information gathering. If you 

want the dirt on someone, she's the one to see, for a price. She 

also sets up betting pools. I'm pretty sure she had one going 

yesterday. I guess when you won, you must have really upset her 

profits!"

     "I see." Ranma said quietly. Then another thought came to him. 

"By the way, since you used to go to Furinkan, maybe you can 

confirm some rumors I've been hearing from there."

     "Like what?"

     "Well, I was considering to enroll at Furinkan when I came to 

Tokyo, but when I heard some crazy stories, I decided to enroll 

here because those stories sounded too unbelievable!"

     "Believe me! Anything that you have heard from Furinkan is 

true!" Sodan affirmed.

     "You mean, the part where they have some crazy Hawaiian nut 

for a principal?"

     "You got it! He was the main reason why I transferred to this 

school! When he showed up at the beginning of the semester, he 

made up this stupid rule that all boys had to get buzz cuts and all 

girls get bowl cuts!"

     "Are you serious?" Ranma began to unconsciously finger his 

ponytail.

     "I'm serious! Then he made all the students go chasing around 

the school, looking for some stupid coconut that had a 'get-out-

of-rules-free' paper in it! He set up weird traps and stuff and even 

hadseveral dozen principal's offices to annoy the students! After 

giving him several rounds of torture, we finally managed to make 

him give up that haircut idea for a while! Since then, he's been 

coming up with all sorts of ways to torment us! I left for Himoto 

soon after that coconut incident. From what I've heard, he's still 

after everyone's hair! I've seen him leap out and cut off a student's 

hair in three seconds with those barber shears of his! The longer 

your hair is, the more likely a target you become!"

     "Whoa, that's weird!"

     It was at that moment that Kai came running up to the group. 

"Hey guys! Look what I've got!" He began waving a handful of 

large denominations of yen notes. "Hey Cojiro! Your fighting 

style is really raking in the big bucks!"

     "Oh really?" Ranma responded.

     "I'll say! That tape I made of you fighting Furinkan yesterday is 

the hottest item on the market! Lots of students are wondering if 

you could start a class and teach that Neko Ken of yours! They're 

willing to shell out a lot of money to attend!"

     "This could help out our sports and other physical activities 

clubs." Sodan suggested.

     Ranma sighed and sadly shook his head. "I'm sorry guys, but I 

can't teach anyone how to do Ultimate Neko Ken."

     "Huh? Why not?" Kai asked.

     "I can't teach anyone because of two reasons. First of all, I'm 

still developing this fighting style. I'm not even sure what limits I 

can attain with it. Secondly and most importantly, the initial 

training to this style is far too dangerous. I found out the hard way 

that learning the technique would cause severe mental trauma. The 

technique can also be lethal to innocent bystanders. I was lucky 

because I found a way to control it. Purely by accident and it can't 

be duplicated." <Especially since the Spring of Monster Tiger is 

gone!> "I hate to tell you guys but Ultimate Neko Ken is off 

limits."

     "Aw come on Cojiro. You can bend a little on that right?" Kai 

pleaded.

     "I said no and I mean no!"

     "But"

     "Leave him alone Kai. If he says that it's too dangerous and he 

can't teach it to anyone, then we should respect his wishes. After 

all, he won the No Holds Barred tournament for us."

     "Oh yeah! Speaking about the tournament, I just heard some 

really important news from Furinkan!"

     "What was it?" Ranma asked.

     "Because they lost to you yesterday, the entire student 

population had to submit to buzz cuts and bowl cuts!"

     "What?! I thought the principal gave up on that idea!"

     "Apparently not! It seems that Kuno had signed a contract with 

the principal, confident that Furinkan would win! Of course, he 

was too busy bragging about his 'superior fighting skills,' that he 

didn't bother to read the fine print. If Furinkan won the 

tournament, then the principal would resign. However, if they 

lost"

     "Then everyone would get buzz cuts and bowl cuts." Ranma 

finished.

     "You got it!" Kai nodded his head. "After you had beaten their 

team, he put everyone under those shears of his! And get this, you 

know that Ukyo guy you fought?"

     "Yes" Ranma began to get nervous.

     "Turns out that he wasn't a guy, he's a girl! Cute girl too! She 

just barely managed to convince him that she's female and 

escaped getting a buzz cut! She got a bowl cut with all the other 

girls! Of course this didn't make her any happier though! Everyone 

is really sore at Kuno for signing that contract! They also have a 

lot of hostility toward you!"

     "Hey! How was I supposed to know that this would happen?"

     "That may be true, but they kind of blame you for this mess! 

Not that it's any of our business! Hey Cojiro! Where are you 

going?"

     Ranma neither looked back nor answered as he headed out of 

the gym.

     Ranma arrived at his rented apartment an hour later and headed 

toward the bedroom closet. He then hauled out his knapsack and 

started searching.

     <I can't believe this! I'm just starting my third day of school 

and I've already got a whole other school mad at me! Worst of all, 

my old friend Ucchan paid the price for my victory yesterday! If I 

knew what was going on, I'd thrown the fight! I've got to make 

things better! Now where the heck did I put that stuff? Ah! Here it 

is!>

     Ranma took out a small bottle, which contained a clear, 

emerald-green liquid. It's top was capped with an eye-dropper. 

Pocketing the bottle, he then began to look through the pages of a 

telephone directory. As he flipped through the sections for 

Furinkan's address, he came across a name of an okonomiyaki 

shop that just recently opened up. His eyes widened as he read the 

ad out loud.

     "Ucchan's Okonomiyaki. Owned by Ukyo Kuonji."

     Later that day, Ranma walked down the street toward the 

establishment where his childhood friend was running her 

business. He stopped for a moment at the front door, gathering his 

courage as he prepared to face his old friend again. He took a deep 

breath and entered the building.

     Ukyo looked absolutely miserable as she stood behind the 

grill. She good reason to be despondent. He hair, which had been a 

beautiful mass of brown tresses the day before, had been cropped 

down to an awful bowl cut. She had on her back another large 

spatula and several small ones on her bandoleer. She noted that 

someone had entered her restaurant and put on a small, cheerful 

face.

     "Welcome to the Ucchan's. May I YOU!!!"

     Ranma didn't like the way her expression had become hostile, 

and braced himself for the worst. Ukyo grabbed at her throwing 

spatulas and flung them toward his head. Ranma ducked the 

projectiles, which embedded themselves into the wall behind him.

     "Hey! Calm down! I just want to talk and give you something!"

     "There's nothing to talk about!" Ukyo hissed as she unslung her 

battle spatula and charged at him. "There's nothing you could give 

me that I could possibly want!" She then started swinging.

     Ranma calmly dodged each of her strikes and said, "Oh come 

on! How was I supposed to know you'd get that awful haircut if 

you lost the tournament? I felt bad about it, so I came here to try 

to make things better!"

     "You can make things better by standing still!" Ukyo swung 

again, narrowly missing Ranma's head.

     "Well, I don't think trying to kill me is going to get you back 

your hair!"

     "No, but I'll sure feel a lot better!"

     "Hey! If you want someone to blame, then you should blame 

Kuno! He was the idiot who signed the stupid contract!"

     "We already have! Just about everyone on our team had 

pounded on him after the tournament. But you're also to blame for 

all this! I'm going to enjoy reducing you to a bloody smear!"

     "Hey if you don't stop this right now, I'm going to change my 

mind about restoring your hair!"

     At the mention of regaining her hair, Ukyo stopped in her 

attacks. "W-what?!"

     Ranma then took a step toward her and reached into his pocket. 

Pulling out the small bottle, he unscrewed the eyedropper and 

held it out. With a quick hand motion, he held it over Ukyo's head 

and applied three drops to it. An instant afterwards, the 

okonomiyaki chef felt her scalp begin to tingle. She then felt 

something behind her. Reaching back, she ran her fingers through 

what ever was now covering the nape of her neck.

     Her eyes widened as she brought her hand before her. Between 

her fingers were long strands of thick, healthy hair. Thinking that 

this was some sort of dream, she gave a gentle tug at the tresses. It 

was real! She looked back at Ranma with a shocked expression.

     "H-how did you do that?"

     Ranma smiled as he held up the bottle. "It's an ancient hair-

restoring formula that I came across in China. Unlike Dragon's 

Hair Soup, this stuff works on girls too. Although, I think I used 

too much. Your hair is longer than I remembered."

     Ukyo looked at a nearby mirror and saw that her hair was 

indeed longer than it was yesterday. She saw that its length went 

down to past her waist. Her face softened as she realized she 

could cut it down to its proper length later. She then looked back 

at Ranma.

     "I I don't know what to say. I I'm sorry I attacked you."

     Ranma's smiled as he said, "It's okay. If some nut cut my hair 

like that, I'd be mad too."

     Ukyo became thoughtful as she considered the person before 

her. "Say Cojiro, is it?"

     Ranma nodded. "Could that stuff work on anyone?"

     "Yes. I was planning to go to Furinkan tomorrow and help the 

other students."

     "You are? That's great!" Her face then became saddened as she 

remembered. "Oh but, the principal won't like that. He'll make 

us have those haircuts again!"

     "Don't worry!" Ranma assured as he headed toward the door. 

"I've got some things to discuss with him too! Trust me! Once I'm 

through with him, he won't be inclined to cut anyone's hair again!" 

Just as Ranma opened the door, he looked back to Ukyo and said 

with a smile, "By the way, you really look cute with long hair. 

Especially as a girl!"

     Ukyo felt her heart stop at that comment. Her cheeks began to 

blush with a fierce crimson as she watched him exit. <No one had 

ever called me cute before I think I like it!>



The next morning

     Fortunately for Ranma, the teachers had granted him the day 

off, in gratitude for the victory at the tournament. After getting 

directions to Furinkan High, Ranma walked to meet with the 

Headmaster from Hell. After walking for a while, he noticed a 

huge number of teenagers, moving at a frantic pace toward the 

gates of the high school. He frowned as looked to each student. 

Every boy had been given a buzz cut. Every girl had an awful bowl 

cut. He also noticed that many had sustained various injuries and 

their clothes were tattered. Looking to the rear of the mob, he 

spotted Akane, Nabiki and Ukyo. Deciding to jog behind the 

crowds, he focused his enhanced hearing on the conversation 

between the three girls.

     "So it's really true? This Cojiro guy grew back your hair?!" 

Akane asked.

     "It's true!" Ukyo affirmed as she ran her fingers though the 

newly trimmed tresses. " That guy didn't ask for anything! He kind 

of felt sorry for me and used this potion to restore it! He's not as 

bad as I thought! He said that was coming today to teach that 

principal a lesson!"

     "Really?" Nabiki said with a mercenary gleam in her eyes. She 

could make a lot of money from whatever he used to restore 

Ukyo's hair. She could also make considerable profits on the 

encounter between the principal and Cojiro. More than enough to 

recoup her losses at the tournament.

     "I don't believe it!" Akane said and she fingered her own, 

principal-approved hairstyle. "Why would he restore your hair, and 

not the rest of us?"

     "I don't know, but I'm not one to look a gift horse in the mouth." 

Ukyo shrugged. "Then again, considering how just about the way 

everyone at school hates this guy for beating us a couple of days 

ago, he wouldn't feel very welcome if he showed up. He'd 

probably get chased out by an angry mob!"

     "You got it in one, Ukyo!" Ranma said as he ran up beside the 

three.

     "Cojiro! Good to see you!" Ukyo exclaimed.

     The three looked to their right and saw Ranma running beside 

them. Each of them had mixed reactions at his sudden appearance.

     Nabiki looked at him and saw a considerable source of income. 

Ranma was tall, lean and well muscled. He was about 6'1" and had 

long, raven hair, tied in a loose ponytail that went halfway down 

his back. His eyes were blue and his face was very handsome. He 

was a great martial artist, if the tournament was any indication. 

The fact that he had access to some miracle hair-restorer was also 

a plus. She could see how this person could make her a lot of yen! 

Plans of selling photos and betting pools made yen signs appear 

before her.

     Akane took one look at him and repressed the sudden urge to 

lash out at him. She hadn't forgotten what he had done to her at the 

tournament. In front of the whole school, he had humiliated her. 

He had beaten her without even laying a hand on her. She had 

prided herself on being the best martial artist in Nerima. Now this 

upstart had taken it all away. It was his fault that she had gotten this 

stupid haircut! Boys were nothing but perverts!

     Ukyo looked at her new friend and had mixed feelings. Sure he 

had beaten her at the tournament and had inadvertently caused her 

to have her hair cut. The fact that she was also a girl had been 

exposed. Then again, he did restore her hair. Now he was heading 

to her school in order to put the principal in his place and offered 

to restore the hair of all the other students as well. He was good-

looking and had called her cute. Ukyo decided to reserve her 

judgment about this Cojiro, until the matter with the principal was 

resolved. 

     "So what's with the marathon?"

     Ranma's voice snapped Ukyo back to the present as she nodded 

to him. "That stupid principal made up another one of his stupid 

rules!"

     "Really? What is it?"

     Nabiki decided to answer. "He told everyone yesterday that 

anyone coming in late for school would have to clean out toilets 

for a month! Pretty small time if you ask me! Oh I'm sorry, we 

haven't introduced ourselves. I'm Nabiki Tendo."

     "Nice to meet you." Ranma nodded to the older sister.

     "And I believe you remember Akane." Nabiki gestured to her 

sibling, who turned up her nose and tried to ignore his presence. 

"You'll have to excuse my sister's rude behavior. She's still pretty 

steamed about the new haircut and losing to you a couple of days 

ago."

     "Hey, don't worry about it! After I'm finished with your 

principal, I'll grow her hair back with everyone else's!"

     "Oh?" Nabiki remarked as she became more interested. Akane 

also became intrigued at the thought of getting her hair back, 

despite her continued attempts to ignore him. "Say Cojiro 

would you be interested in a little business proposition?"

     "Later Nabiki. We're almost at the school. By the way, why 

does everyone look like they've been walking through a 

minefield?"

     "It's more of that principal's stupid tricks!" Ukyo replied. "He 

put up booby traps and other obstacles in the surrounding areas! 

He really wants to make a lot of us late!"

     "Well, I'm going to have to see him about that too!" Ranma 

remarked as he saw the gates of Furinkan High in the distance. On 

top of the gates, he saw a man that was dressed in a colorful 

Hawaiian shirt, Bermuda shorts and sandals. He wore a pair of 

dark shades and on top of his head appeared to be, a small palm 

tree? He held up a megaphone and laughed maniacally!"

     "Aloha all you bruddas and sisters! You gunna be mucho tardy. 

Nobody gunna get in da gates before the clock strikes! Da Big 

Kahuna says you be scrubbing them toilets today, yah!"

     "That's the principal?!" Ranma asked in disbelief.

     Ukyo, Akane and Nabiki nodded.

     "Well, in that case" Ranma suddenly accelerated and 

overtook the entire group. The students were a little more than 

startled when they saw someone rush forward in a blur and was at 

the front gates in an instant. Nabiki was especially astounded. She 

had estimated that the distance they still had to cover was at least 

five hundred yards. Ranma had traversed the distance in under half 

a second!

     The principal looked down at the person who was at the locked 

front gate and snickered. "Oh, you volunteer to be the first to 

scrub them toilets!" Then he noticed Ranma's long hair. "Oho! I 

missed one! You also be getting the buzz cut!" With these words, 

he leapt down and produced a pair of barber shears. 

     Ranma had been expecting this reaction, considering what his 

friend Sodan had told him. Dodging the principal's lunge at his 

temple, Ranma lashed out with a spin kick that connected with his 

foe's head. The headmaster was slammed face first into the 

concrete wall. He made a considerable impression in the wall as 

he painfully slid down to the ground.

     "Ooooh! You do that on purpose!" He moaned as he picked 

himself off the ground.

     "Damn right I did!" Ranma said as he waited for the principal's 

next move. 

     "Hey keiki! How's about a nice pineapple?" 

     Ranma saw his foe toss him what appeared to be an ordinary 

fruit. However, Ranma knew better. Before starting out for 

Furinkan, he had talked with Sodan and asked him for more 

information about the principal. He knew there was some kind of 

bomb in it. As the pineapple flew toward him, Ranma did a back 

flip and kicked it back.

     The principle let out a surprised yelp as his own weapon was 

sent back and exploded. When the dust cleared, he was sprawled 

on the ground in a small crater. His clothes were tattered and 

smoking as he moaned in pain. He then slumped into 

unconsciousness.

     Ranma smiled as he turned toward the gate. The iron gates were 

locked tight and upon closer inspection, he noticed that the locks 

and the hinges had been welded shut. Shrugging at the minor 

problem, he simply grabbed hold of the bars and pulled.

     To the amazement of the approaching students, Ranma 

wrenched the gates of the high school free of their hinges and 

held them aloft. Placing the gates to the side, he picked up the 

principal's megaphone and yelled, "COME ON YOU GUYS! 

THERE"S STILL ONE MINUTE LEFT!!" Ranma pointed up to the 

large clock and indicated the time. 

     This was all the incentive the students needed. With a final 

burst of speed, the crowd made a mad dash to the school's 

entrance, just as the Hawaiian nut had regained consciousness. He 

then looked at the approaching mob and let out a pathetic squeak 

as he realized that he was in their path.

     "OW! OUCH! YOW! HOLD IT! OW! YOWZA! NO! 

YEEEEEOOOOW! OUCHIE! OH BOY! STOP! OOOH! OH 

MOMMA! HELP! COWABUNGA! THAT HURT!"

     Thirty seconds before the bell rang, the last student passed 

through the gate. In their wake, the principal was sprawled on his 

back with a glazed look and hundreds of footprints all over his 

body. He was also sporting several large bruises from being 

trampled by the entire student population of Furinkan.

     Ranma smiled with satisfaction as he hefted the gates and 

slammed them back into place. He then stepped back and began 

concentrating his chi. His eyes glowed red.

     "CAT'S EYE BEAMS! RAPID FIRE!"

     Four short, but very intense beams of heat blasted from his 

eyes and hit the hinges of the gates, welding them back into place. 

The students were astounded as they recognized the technique. 

They stared at the Neko Ken fighter in silence. They were unsure 

whether to cheer him for getting them into the school on time, or 

to kill him for their loss at the No Holds Barred Tournament.

     Ranma smiled as he heard the late bell ring. He then pointed to 

the still dazed principal who was outside the school gates. Raising 

the megaphone, he said out loud with a grin, "HEY EVERYBODY! 

THE PRINCIPAL'S OUTSIDE THE SCHOOL GATES! THE LATE 

BELL HAS RUNG! EVERYONE ELSE IS INSIDE! THE 

PRINCIPAL IS TARDY! SO WHAT DOES THAT MEAN?"

     There was a smile on everyone's face as the truth sank in. In 

one enthusiastic cheer, the crowd gave their answer.

     "THE BIG KAHUNA IS GOING TO BE SCRUBBING 

TOILETS!!!!"

     Ranma smiled as the students continued to cheer.

     At noon, Ranma entered the cafeteria and encountered a 

thunderous round of applause. Many students were giving him high 

five's and backslapping as he approached the front benches. 

Standing on a table, he held up a megaphone and waved for their 

attention. As soon as it quieted down , he addressed the crowd.

     "I know that some of you consider me the enemy, because I 

defeated your team during the No Holds Barred Tournament! 

Many of you blame me for the buzz cuts and bowl cuts! I assure 

you, I had no idea that would happen. Therefore, I wish to make 

amends!" He then scanned the crowd and spotted the only other 

person who did not have a principal-approved haircut. "Ukyo 

Kuonji! Would you please come forward?"

     Ukyo stood up and slowly walked toward the front. Many 

people gasped when they saw that her hair had grown back. Many 

reached out to give her tresses a tug to make certain that it wasn't 

a wig. After a few pulls, she gave them an irritated glare. When she 

reached the front, Ranma continued.

     "As you can see, Ukyo has her hair back! I have something that 

will allow everyone to get his or her hair back too! I am willing to 

share it with all of you! Free of charge!"

     Nabiki spat out the milk she was drinking, the moment he said 

the word 'free.' She saw the yen signs come crashing down to the 

ground. All her plans to market the hair formula were gone in an 

instant.

     Ranma smiled as he saw the hopeful looks on everyone's faces. 

"The contract that Kuno signed stated that everyone get haircuts if 

Furinkan lost the tournament. And everyone did! The contract did 

not mention anything about the students growing their hair back!"

     There was a thunderous cheer or agreement. Ranma then 

continued. "Therefore, at the end of school, near the baseball 

diamond, I will administer enough of the formula, so that each 

student will regain at least fifteen inches of hair in an hour! You 

can then visit your barbers or hairdressers to get it cut or styled 

the way you want it! See you then!"

     There was another thunderous cheer as Ranma left the 

cafeteria.

     Later on in the afternoon, Ranma walked toward the storage 

room to get some large water bottles. He figured that if he 

dumped the entire contents of the bottle of hair-growing tonic 

into several gallons of water, the diluted formula should be 

enough to do the job. A teaspoon per student would suffice. 

Granted, their hair won't grow instantly as Ukyo's did, but 

considering how strong the formula was, they should be happy by 

the next day. Just as he was about to head downstairs, he heard 

some moans and pleas. Looking around the corner, he saw group 

of boys standing in front of a restroom. Judging by the way they 

were hunched over and squeezing their legs, he figured that they 

really needed to go!

     "Hey! What's happening?" Ranma asked as he walked over to the 

group.

     One boy looked at him and said, "That stupid principal has 

locked all the doors to all the restrooms! He's in there right now 

with the only set of keys!"

     "How long has been in there?"

     "More than twenty minutes! Every time he cleans a room, he 

locks the door. He wants us all to suffer. He told us that no one 

uses a restroom until he has finished cleaning ALL of them!"

     "How many restrooms are there?"

     "Fifty! All of them are locked! Every one of them has students 

waiting outside to use them! He's only done two and the others are 

too filthy for anyone to use! Looks like he dirtied them up 

beforehand when he made up that late rule! Doors have been 

replaced with reinforced steel ones and are too thick for us to 

break through!"

     "I can see why you haven't gone to another room. Well, we can't 

have that now can we?" Ranma stepped up to the door and knocked.

     "Uh uh! Nobody be using them rooms until I be done with all of 

them!" The Headmaster from Hell laughed.

     "This will be your first, last and only warning, you macadamia 

nut! Get your butt in gear OR ELSE!" Ranma's voice became 

deadly.

     "HA HA HA HA!!!" The principal laughed.

     Ranma took a stance and stared at the door. He let off a low and 

menacing growl that sounded like his tiger form. The students 

backed away as they watched with awe. The Neko Ken began to 

manifest as Ranma readied his 'claws.'

     "RIPCLAW SLASH!"

     Ranma's right hand glowed with an eerie blue light as he sent it 

in a downward arc. The steel door flashed once and then fell apart 

into two neat pieces. The boys behind him were shocked beyond 

belief. The door had been at least six inches thick and Ranma had 

sliced through it like cardboard. 

     Before the principal could react, Ranma was inside the 

restroom. The school hallways echoed with the tortured screams 

of someone who was being subjected to an intense mauling. This 

was accentuated with some splashing and flushing noises. To 

those who did not attend at Furinkan, it was unbearable to hear. To 

those who did attend, it was music to their ears.

     "ARRRGH! NO! NOT THE FACE! STOP! GLUB! THAT'S NO 

WAY TO GLUG! OW! NO! NO! NOT AGAIN!" FLUSH! 

"PATOOIE! PLEASE STOP! NO! NOT THERE!" SPLASH! 

"HELP!" SPLASH! "AT LEAST USE THE BRUSH! ARRGH! 

GURGLE! GURGLE! PEEYEW!" SPLASH! "OKAY! OKAY! 

OKAY! YOU WIN!" 

     Within record time, all fifty restrooms were available for use. 

The principal had disappeared when the last one was unlocked and 

no one knew where he had disappeared. Whenever they asked 

Ranma about it, he simply smiled and said nothing.



The end of the school day

     The baseball diamond was a place of great excitement as 

students lined up in front of a large table. Ranma was spooning out 

portions of his hair-restorer to each student. Each teen that 

received his or her portion came away with a smile. The formula 

gave their scalps a gentle tingle and they could actually look in a 

mirror and see their hair slowly grow longer.

     When Nabiki came to get her share, she smiled and said, "Say 

Cojiro, this hair tonic of yours really works! I was wondering 

do you have any more of this stuff? Would you like to go into 

business?"

     "Sorry." Ranma replied as he gave another spoonful to a 

grateful student. "This is all I've got." He gestured to the five, one-

liter water bottles on the table beside him. "Once this is gone, 

there isn't any more! I've got just enough for everyone here. By 

the way, if your lackey doesn't put that bottle back in one second, 

I'll slice her in half like I did that bathroom door!" Ranma gestured 

with a thumb to the table behind him.

     There was an audible gulp as Nabiki's henchgirl slowly replaced 

the bottle back with the others. Ranma turned his head and gave 

her a stern glare. The girl gave him a sheepish grin and melted 

back into the crowds. He then turned back to Nabiki, and said, "I 

didn't bring this hair formula for profit. I consider it sort of like a 

peace offering. Besides, I wouldn't wish that stupid principal on 

my worst enemy!" Ranma's ears twitched and he heard the distant 

sound of a helicopter approaching. When the sound got louder, he 

looked up and saw said vehicle hovering above them.

     As if on cue, the insane laughter of the principal was heard. The 

side door opened and revealed said Hawaiian nut emerged with a 

megaphone. "HA HA HA HA! NO ONE BE GETTING THEIR 

HAIR BACK! NOT WHILE DA BIG KAHUNA HAS 

SOMETHING TO SAY ABOUT IT!"

     Ranma became extremely annoyed as the crowds began to 

scatter. In a minute, he was the only one standing in front of the 

table. He sighed as he screwed the cap back on the bottle he was 

using and took a stance. He then called up to the chopper. "What's 

the matter Principal? Still sore at the fact I used your face to clean 

those toilets?"

     "YOU ARE GOING TO PAY FOR YOUR DISRESPECT! THE 

HEADMASTER IS THE BIG KAHUNA! HIS WORDS ARE LAW! 

IF I SAY ALL BRUDDAS AND SISTERS GET BUZZ CUTS AND 

BOWL CUTS, THEY GONNA STAY THAT WAY!" With these 

words, he began lobbing a dozen of his special coconut and 

pineapple bombs at the table.

     With lightning speed, Ranma scooped up the water bottles and 

dashed away, just as the projectiles landed and obliterated the 

table. He then began making a beeline for the main school 

building. However, the principal motioned for his pilot to cut him 

off. Ranma stopped when the helicopter hovered between him and 

the school. The two faced off as the entire school watched.

     "HA HA HA HA! YOU HAVE NO PLACE TO RUN! NO 

PLACE TO HIDE!" The principal taunted as his chopper began 

moving forward. 

     Ranma crouched down, then sprang upward and forward. Before 

the startled eyes of the crowds, and the headmaster especially, he 

leapt over the helicopter that was blocking his way and ran into the 

school building. 

     Getting over his surprise, the Hawaiian principal motioned for 

his chopper to land. As he stepped out, he signaled to some other 

people that were inside. All of a sudden, four large men, each 

armed with huge barber shears came out and followed the 

principal to the front doors of the school.

     "Now this is the Big Kahuna speaking! Go in there and get 

those bottles! I no care how you do it, but get them! Also get that 

smart aleck too! Give him da biggest buzz cut of dem all! I no want 

to see even the smallest bit of hair on him. Got dat? Now go get 

him!"

     The four men nodded as they went inside. The crowds watched 

them enter the school. A minute later, everything was silent. The 

students began edging toward the building, torn between helping 

Ranma and fearing the principal's wrath should they get involved. 

Then it happened.

     From within the depths of the school, there came a tremendous 

roar of some huge animal. It was then followed by screams of 

terror and objects being smashed.

     "IT"S A MONSTER!"

     "OUT OF MY WAY!"

     "LET'S GET OUT OF HERE!"

     "HE NEVER TOLD US ABOUT THIS!"

     "HE AIN'T PAYING US ENOUGH FOR THIS!"

     There were also the sounds of things being shredded and 

broken apart. An instant later, the four men were dashing out of 

the school, their clothes in tatters. All were screaming at the top 

of their lungs as they disappeared over the horizon.

     "HEY! WHERE YOU THINK YOU BE GOING?!" The principal 

was more than confused as he saw four large men flee like scared 

rabbits. He then looked back at the school. A moment later, 

Ranma emerged from the building, calmly dusting off his shoulder 

and grinning like the cat who just swallowed the canary. He then 

caught sight of the principal and took a battle stance.

     The principal swallowed hard as he immediately realized his 

situation. The crowds around him began close in, their 

expressions were anything, but friendly. He found himself cut off 

from his helicopter and the only path he could go was forward. 

Straight at Ranma, who had begun to approach him with slow, 

steady steps. The look in his eyes were promising intense pain.

     "N-now hold on a minute, little keiki!" The principal stammered 

with a nervous grin. "I just be having a little f-fun now! You no 

want the haircuts, is n-n-no problem! Is all just a little joke, yah?"

     "A joke?" Ranma repeated in a deadly tone. "Okay, if you 

thought all of this was funny, then you'll really get a laugh out of 

this!"

     Ranma leapt at the principal with a speed that defied 

imagination. Her screamed as he saw him rear back with a 'claw' 

and shut his eyes. He felt a something whip by as he head Ranma's 

voice shout out the attack.

     "QUICK SWIPE!"

     The principal braced himself and waited for the end. For a long 

time, everything was silent. Nothing was said nor heard. When he 

realized that he wasn't dead, the principal opened his eyes and 

looked around. He saw the students were staring at him. Behind 

him, he saw Ranma who was casually standing with his arms 

folded. When he looked down and saw that his body was 

untouched, he began laughing. 

     "Ha ha ha ha ha! You missed! I" It was then that he noticed 

that it was awful drafty. His head felt cool as he felt the evening 

breeze blow over his scalp. He felt something brush against his 

foot. What he saw on the ground caused him to go pale. There on 

the cold pavement was a large pile of hair and the shredded 

remains of a tiny palm tree.

     The principal let off a loud wail as he reached up and felt his 

bald head. His screams became even louder as he realized that 

there wasn't even stubble left. Ranma had somehow shaved him 

bare. Soon his screams became accompanied by the laughter of 

the Furinkan High students. It was so ironic. The principal had 

finally gotten a taste of his own medicine! It soon became 

unbearable for the headmaster to handle as he went running off 

from the schoolyard, still clutching his head and screaming like a 

maniac.

     After the principal had disappeared from sight, Ranma went 

back into the school and retrieved the bottles of hair-restorer. He 

waited for the crowds to stop in their mirth. When the snickering, 

the giggling and the guffaws finally ceased, he then picked up the 

megaphone that the Hawaiian nut had dropped and said, "OKAY! 

WHO'S WAS NEXT IN LINE?" 



To be continued



Author's Notes

     Quick Swipe: A very fast slash in which Ranma can cut through 

materials in less than a nanosecond. Not very strong but it is 

effective in delivering secret strikes where the opponent least 

expects it.

     In any case, the Headmaster from Hell has been dealt with, but 

he will return eventually. The changes to this chapter are just to 

make it more full.



