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Planet of the Apes

Ahh...the movie theater. A place where you can spend your entire month savings on a ticket and take out a loan to buy a small popcorn and a box of Goobers. Where used gum and smuggled-in cigarettes decorate the theater floor. And if you're lucky, there will be one light in the whole movie theater that doesn't go out when the movie starts and that light will be the one right over you. Either you are mad at that or you're waiting for God to give you a message, like "leave the theater". Okay, all that stuff doesn't happen, well, actually all of it can. Yeah, the light thing did happen to me. At least it distracted me from the terrible movie, The Animal (shudder). Well, let's get past the opening of this review and get to the nitty-gritty (hehe...funny word). I went to see a movie that made me feel happy to see original plots. That's right, Planet of the Apes.

Tim Burton's remake of the timeless classic was good to me. I'm not the biggest fan of Tim Burton films. I did like Beatlejuice. And Nightmare Before Christmas. I guess I like his dark sense of humor. But this movie had the two elements that can make any man interested. Action and monkeys.

The characters were great. The classic hero who is forced to free the human race and the enemy who's ways of thinking is in the hero's way. I never really learned their names, though. I went through the whole movie calling General Tay (I don't even know if that's right. I'll just say the bad guy ape) Tim Roth. If you heard the rumor that Charleton Heston makes a cameo, then, in the words of Ed McMann, "You are correct, sir!". He even says a line from the original movie.'s so cool! I won't tell you anymore about that.

The plot was one of the only things that had anything in common with the original. It's pretty much the same thing. Humans in space, humans crash-land on planet of apes, hero is captured, hero escapes. Stuff like that. Even the ending. Well, sort of. If you've seen the original, then you know the hero of the movie finds out that he was on Earth all along. Well, this version is a little different, but keep in mind, it is a retelling. The same movie, just with a different director and better technology. You have probably heard that some people think the ending set up for a sequel. Well, that might be, but I think it was a clever way to put my local police force in a movie. Wait, those were apes in police uniforms. Hey, simple mistake.

Basically, this movie is the standard sci-fi action movie. Big fights, big explosions, the usual stuff. If you like that kind of stuff (like me), go see the movie. Although, by the time you've read this, you have probably seen the movie already. A lot of people have. And to those who haven't seen it, what are you waiting for? Apes to take over the earth? Go see it!