A Really Messed Up Romance Fic.
By Hikari4Takeru

Dedicated to DarkGaotmomnanfe. *snicker*

Once upon a time, in the land of Messed Up Romance Fics, there lived a fig who lived with her two stepsisters and her eeevil stepmother. Her name was Figgerella. She was a slave. I laugh at thee! HA AHA HA AHA HA HA AH! ... anyways, like I said, yes, she was a slave. All day long she had to wash clothes and scrub floors and do a whole lot of other crap.

One day, the doorbell rang, and Figgerella answered it. It was Mr. Prune.

"Hi, Mr. Prune!!" she said. "Your name sounds funny!"

"...to shay..." he replied. "Anyways, there's going to be a ball tomorrow night, everyone in the kingdom is invited, blah blah blah."

"Everyone?"

"Yeah. Everyone."

"YAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAY!!" Figgerella was so happy she she slammed the door, smashing Mr. Prune's unusually large nose.

Figgerella quickly ran to tell her eeevil stepmother and stepsisters.

"THERE'S GOING TO BE A BALL AND EVERYONE'S INVITED!! YAAAY!" she screamed.

One of her stepsisters, Date, replied. "Yeah, everyone but YOU!"

Figgerella's usually bright face faded. "...really?"

Her other sister, Plum, also joined in on the fun. "Cause you don't have anything nice to wear so THERE!!"

"Besides..." Date said, evilly. "There's no way you can get all your chores done by tomorrow night!"

"Oh, I will, I will!" Figgerella chirped. "And I'll find something nice to wear and everything!!"

Her sisters just laughed and left her to do the laundry.

***

The next day, Figgerella woke up VERY VERY VERY VERY EARLY (around noon) so she would be able to do all of her chores, and still have time to find something to wear by nightfall.

She hurried up and did all of her chores (badly, I might add). There was still an hour to go until the ball... could she find something to wear in time?

Nope. So Figgerella broke into Date's room and took one of her dresses.

She was just about to go, when stupid Date FINALLY realized that Figgerella was wearing one of her dresses.

"NO WAY!! THERE IS NO WAY YOU ARE WEARING THAT DRESS! IT'S MINE!" she tried to rip it off, then Plum gave her a warning.

"If you take off that dress, she'll be naked."

"EWWWWWWWWWWW!" they both said, and left her in the parlor as they hopped into the carriage and left.

Well, Figgerella started crying. As well as any fig can cry, I mean, have you ever seen a fig cry? I haven't. If you have, tell me.

...anyways, her Fairy Orangemother finally came.

"I can grant you one wish!" The Fairy Orangemother said.

"I want to go to the ball and have Prince Stone fall in love with me!"

"Easy!" The Fairy Orangemother waved her wand. All of a sudden, out of the blue, there was a HAT!

Figgerella just blinked. "A hat?"

"NO NO NO NO NO!" The Fairy Orangemother replied. "You MUST capitalize all the letters. It shows the importance."

"Oh. A HAT?" Figgerella blinked again.

The Fairy Orangemother smiled. "Don't worry. Just keep that HAT on all night, and nothing will go wrong."

So Figgerella got up and walked next door to the ball.

Once there, Figgerella immedietly saw Prince Stone. He was a stone. And a Prince. (Well, DUH...) and Prince Stone immedietly saw her. Well, her HAT at least.

"You have such a beautiful HAT!" He said. "What is your name?"

Figgerella blushed and told him.

"What a most beautiful name... I love you!!! Let's get marry-"

But all of a sudden, Figgerella saw her eeevil stepmother and her stepsisters coming toward her out of the corner of her eye. She screamed loudly and started running to her house. Along the way... she lost her HAT...

***

The next day, Figgerella woke up and once again began to work. She heard the doorbell again, and went to answer it. There was Mr. Prune and... Prince Stone!

"Ohmigosh!" she gasped. "Prince Stone!"

"Figgerella!!"

"Prince Stone!"

[ INSERT FIELD OF DAISIES SCENE HERE ]

They finally stopped hugging and kissing, and Prince Stone motioned something to Mr. Prune. Mr. Prune promptly held up Figgerella's HAT.

"YAYYYYYY!!" She said, glomping Prince Stone. "YOU FOUND MY HAT!! I LOVE YOU!"

"I love you too, Figgerella!"

And they all got married and lived happily ever after, until Figgerella divorced Prince Stone for being an alchoholic.

THE END!

Explanation:

Well, the reason I wrote a stone/fig fic is because... I wanted to!! I was inspired by my friend, DarkGatomon's site. ^_^ (https://www.angelfire.com/anime2/darkgatomon) Go there, btw. Anyways, I was inspired by this one passage on her site:

"THIS SITE CONTAINS ROMANTIC MATERIAL. In other words: boy/boy, boy/girl, girl/boy, girl/girl, stone/fig (yes, stone/fig. I am doubtful that I will ever write something in which a small piece of rock is romantically attracted to a funky-looking fruit, but I feel that I should put this warning up, just in case I ever do). If you are offended by any of this, then PLEASE LEAVE NOW. THIS IS THE ONLY WARNING YOU WILL SEE ON THIS SITE. So, if you are deeply offended by a stone/fig relationship that you see on this site, please refrain from making yourself look like an idiot by flaming me. It's really a waste of your time, and it's probably going to annoy you far more than it will annoy me. Thank you!"

^_^ I think that explains it quite well. Hope you enjoyed it!