Voice: LIVE FROM A CARDBOARD BOX... IT'S... A MOCKERY OF THE PENCIL SHOW!!

Hika: I have a dog! Dog! Dog!
His name is Bryce! Bryce! Bryce!
He likes to eat! Eat! Eat!
A lot of rice! Rice! Rice!

DG: I have a dog! Dog! Dog!
His name is Rick! Rick! Rick!
He likes to eat! Eat! Eat!
A lot of sticks! Sticks! Sticks!

TG: I have a dog! Dog! Dog!
His name is Reese! Reese! Reese!
He likes to eat! Eat! Eat!
A lot of cheese! Cheese! Cheese!

Hika: Hello, and welcome to A Mockery of The Pencil Show!

DG: It's a mockery!

Hika: Of the Pencil Show!

TG: And once again... WE'RE BACK TO CO-HOST! And we have a guest! ^^

Hika: A very... RANDOM guest.

DG: This guy is as random as you can get! He's...

TG: A RANDOM GUY NAMED CHRIS PODIMA! ...how does he have anything to do with LotRs?

Hika: Who cares, we're the GJT! Before we bring him out, we'd also like to introduce a friend of ours. Since Chris is not a friend. Please welcome Taichi!

TG: Taichi! *Gropes randomly* This is NOT our muse Taichi... mind you... o.O

DG: No, no, it's a freaky Taichi.

Taichi: o.o; I'm not freaky!

Hika: This is my "husband" Taichi. We got married in Vegas.

DG: See? I said he was freaky. Now, let's get on with the show, shall we?

TG: AND! FOR THE FANGIRLS PLEASURE... We have... My muse... Sean Biggerstaff / Oliver Wood! *Holds up a leash*

Hika: Let's!

TG: Okay... Bring him out!

DG: ....oh, fine, I'll bring mine out, too. *drags out Frodo, all cute and stuff*

Hika: *spazzes* FRODO!

TG: Woot! It's Frodo people.

*Random people drag out a Random Guy Named Chris Podima*

DG: My Frodo's much better than RGNCP... but, alas, he isn't who we're interviewing. SO!

Chris Podima: o.o;;;;;;;;;;;

DG: Okay, does anybody here have a question for a random guy named Chris Podima? ...anybody?

Hika: I DO! I DO! "Do you like eating rats?"

Sean 'Biggerstaff': o.o;;

Chris Podima: No, I do NOT like eating rats. AND YOU MAKE ME! *sobs hysterically*

Hika: *shakes head* Crybaby.

DG: Rats are good food for random guys named Chris Podima, I think.

Hika: Me too!

TG: *Pet Pats Chris Podima and hands him a mouse* There there.

DG: Alright, I got one, then. What would you do if our sponsor, Electrical Field Disrupting Shock Wave Producer Producers, did testing on you with their product, the Electrical Field Disrupting Shock Wave Producer?

Sean 'Biggerstaff': *Whispers to Taichi* How do we get away?

Chris Podima: Erm. Die?

TG: Nice answer. ^^

Hika: That works. I like it!

DG: My fave!

Taichi: *dies*

Hika: NO! TAICHI! I'll cut your hair! YOUR HAIR!

Sean 'Biggerstaff': o.o;;

DG: DON'T LET HER CUT YOUR HAIR!!!

TG: NO! Taichi you can't die! *Performs CPR on him* o.O

Taichi: x.x

DG: Erm. Goddess?

TG: Hika.... The spray...

DG: ...aren't you a, you know, goddess?

Hika: *shoves Taichi to the side* We'll worry about him later.

Taichi: x.x

Hika: I *did* spray him with immortality spray.

DG: He is SUCH a wimp.

TG: *Sweatdrops* *Moves her hands around causing blue magic graphic effect and putting it on him* Live human child...

Taichi: x.x

Hika: *looks at TG oddly*

Taichi: *still dead*

TG: O.o I'm trying...

DG: ...SUCH a wimp, I say.

TG: A fug him!

DG: Um... yes! Yes, indeed. Now, d'ya have a question fer our guest er what?

TG: Chris...If you had to choose between eating rats and being yaoi with a kid named Thian what would you do? *Pokes him* Well Chris....

DG: Yeah, I'm dying to know!!

Isthian: *randomly there* .....me, too.

Hika: Me too! *glomps Thian* Hi!

Taichi: x.x *dead and drifting away*

TG: Yeah... Hi Thian!

Hika: How's Fiona?

Isthian: *going all oggly over TG and Hika* Who's Friona?

TG: And your partner in insanity Taira? ... O.o *Thwacks him* I have a man! *Shoves Biggerstaff at him* Attack him my muse!

Isthian: Duhhh.... you're pretty. Wanna kiss me, honeys?? *makes a pufferfish face*

Taichi: *drift... drift...*

Hika: *blinks* Aren't I married? *realizes Taichi's dead* HE'S MINE! *grabs him*

Taichi: *gets up*

Sean 'Biggerstaff': *Punches him* Away from the authors!

Isthian: WAGH!! I'M SORRY I'M SORRY I DIDN'T MEAN IT I'M SORRY!!! *runs off*

DG: *blinks after Isthian a few times* Er. That was interesting. Now for a few messages from our sponsors!

*****************************************************************************
DG: Have you ever had company come over, all of a sudden? Company you hate? Ones that you don't want to know about your fancy robot-butlers that automatically answer the door, since they'll probably steal them, claim them as their own, patent them, and make millions that should rightfully be yours???? Well, then we have the product for you! Introducing the ELECTRICAL FIELD DISRUPTING SHOCK WAVE PRODUCER!!!!

It will turn off all of those pesky electronic things that you want to keep out of sight, INSTANTLY!! And at the low, low price of twenty million digidollars!!

Side effects include random guys named Chris Podima suffering black outs, insanity, and/or horrible, horrible death. Symptoms are usually severe to cataclysmic.
*****************************************************************************
Hika: Today we have a VERY special offer for you! This wonderful little device is perfect for just about everything! You can clean with it, dance with it, defeat rabid squirrel men or smother random guys named Chris Podima! For only six easy payments of $24.99, you can get this wonderful, this amazing, paper towel!!! All your friends will be jealous, as you clean those dishes and kill those random guys with comfort and style!
*****************************************************************************
*Two logos appear in the corner of the screen: The logo of Industrial Quality Chain and their new partner, High Quality Rats*

TG: High Quality Rats, the best way to keep your Chris Podima happy and healthy!

*Pan to Chris, who doesn't look too happy*

*Throws the rats at him and he looks at them in disgust*

*The chain is yanked, for now you have an Industrial Quality choke chain, and the boy eats.*

*Alas, he still don't look happy. So with another yank and someone glaring at him, he smiles*

TG: And we also introduce, for those who have an overly plump CP..... *Pan to really small rats* DIET RAT! The best way to get your pet in shape!
*****************************************************************************

DG: So, uh, how about that answer, Chris? *pokes Podima a few times*

TG: Yeah...

Taichi: *walks onto stage, has Alzheimer's and amnesia* Is this Jerry Springer?

TG: CLOSE!

DG: Foolish human.

Hika: ... o.O Um... HI TAICHI!

Taichi: Taichi? Who Taichi? Who you?

TG: CHRIS! What's the answer!

DG: You're Taichi, you foolish person... can we get him out of here?

Taichi: Who am I?

Chris: I uh... I'm not YAOI! I REFUSE... Unless it's a lemon...

DG: Nobody. Nothing. GO AWAY, TAICHI.

TG: *Pulls Taichi over* You are Taichi Yagami. ^^

Taichi: Taichi? Why does everyone call me Taichi? My name... Fried.

DG: ....ew? EW!! The THOUGHT of HIM in ANY couple IS totally SICKENING!!

Hika: Hi Fried!

Taichi: Nooo....... Me name... Fridodo.

Hika: How 'bout this for a question, Chris. What's your preferred way of dying?

TG: *Sweatdrops* Okay... Fried...

DG: Whatever you say, Fridodo.

Chris: Hmmmmmm... being torn to death by rabid fangirls.

TG: You are in luck then!

Hika: Hee hee. Fridodo.

Hika: *brings in a cage full of Legolas fangirls*

TG: *Whistles* OH FANGIRLS!

Taichi: *sits down in a chair*

Hika: *points to Chris* He tried to rape Legolas.

DG: *throws open the lock* MAUL HIM!!

TG: GET HIM!

Hika: *watches in amusement*

Taichi: Legolas? I played him in that one movie... uhm... The Shining.

Rabid Legolas Fangirls: AYAYAYAYAYAYAYAYAYAYAYAYAYAYAYAAYAY! *kills Chris*

TG: *Passes out popcorn and sits on Biggerstaff's lap* Hey girls!

DG: Yum! *throws away her own popcorn and steals some of Hika's*

Hika: *oblivious to the fact DG's stealing her popcorn*

TG: Legolas threw him self off the cliff from recoil... GO SAVE HIM!

DG: Off ya go!

TG: *Looks to Taichi* You are not Legolas....

Rabid Legolas Fangirls: LEGOLAS! MY PRETTY LEGOLAS! *all jump off a cliff carrying Chris with them*

Hika: That's a good thing too.

Taichi: No, I'm Friodo.

TG: YAY! Now that THAT is solved bring out the real guest... FRODO!

Hika: YAY! FRODO! *glomps Frodo* I LOVE YOU FRODO!

Taichi: Frito.

DG: ...Fried I was okay with. Fridodo was okay, too. BUT FRIODO?? That's just crazy talk, man!

Frodo: o.o;;

TG: *Anime pose*

Taichi: Fritos....those chips are good...

DG: Hey, careful with my muse, there!

TG: Okay, Frodo.

DG: STOP PLUGGING COMPANIES THAT AREN'T OUR SPONSORS!! *bright smile* Speaking of which, have I mentioned the wonders of the paper towel yet?

Taichi: Mmmmm........ Frito.

DG: *in background* Ah, yes, paper towels. So useful! So handy! So versatile!

Taichi: I've got to go... my hair doesn't fluff itself, you know!

DG: *gets angry* I SAID NO PLUGGING!! *shoves Taichi off a cliff*

Hika: Awwww! BAI TAICHI!!!! *ushers him out a nice door instead of off a cliff before DG can get to him*

Taichi: Byeeeeeeee!

Hika: Too late. *shrugs*

DG: Nice try, imoto-san, really!

TG: If you had to be trapped on a deserted island... Who would you rather be stuck with: The "GJT" or some rabid Chipmunk man that fears PAPER?

Hika: *nods*

Frodo: o.O

DG: Welllll????

Hika: I love you, Frodo.

TG: I'm waiting?

Frodo: Um. *scared* Rabid chipmunk man, definitely!!

Sean 'Biggerstaff': o.o;;;

DG: I LOVE HIM MORE!!!

Hika: I LOVE HIM A LOT MORE THAN YOU DO!

Frodo: o.o;;;;

DG: NO!! ME!!!

TG: WHAT! Oh... I feel so unloved now...

Hika: ME!

DG: ....er... you're a very nice Joshin? *goes back to the fight* ME!!!! He's MY muse!!

Frodo: *tries sneaking off stage*

Sean 'Biggerstaff': I love you....*Get hugged by TG*

Hika: He's my... um... uh... I LIKE DOMINIC MONAGHAN MORE THEN YOU!

TG: YAY!

Frodo: o.o;;;

DG: NOOOO!!! COME BACK!!! *chases after Frodo* And, uh... YES!! 'CAUSE FRODO IS THE BEST!!

TG: Well... That's the show... Next time we might have the TREE OR THE GIRLY NAILS... BYE ALL! Wave good bye now Muse Biggerstaff.

Sean 'Biggerstaff': o.o;; *Waves*