The Sailor Scouts vs. The Digidestined By: Raberba girl Here's a little translating thing, for those of you who don't know: Taichi/Tai Yamato/Matt Koushiro/Izzy Takeru/T.K. Hikari/Kari Jyou/Joe (Sora and Mimi have the same Japanese and English names.) It was a beautiful sunny day in the Digiworld. The Digidestined kids were wandering along, looking for Randomevilvillainbadguymon so that they could fight him. Well, they ended up bumping into a much, much worse enemy. . .more terrifying and annoying than ANY digimon can ever be (and that's including Etemon). . . The Digidestined are about to face-off in the hardest battle of their lives, with (dum dum DUUUUM!) the SAILOR SCOUTS! "So," Taichi said, "I wonder where Randomevilvillainbadguymon is?!" Yamato spontaneously pulled out his harmonica and started to play for some unknown reason. "Noooo!" Jyou moaned, "Now I'll be depressed all day! Don't you know any other songs, Yamato?!" Everyone ignored Jyou, because he always complains about stuff like that. Just then, Hikari started glowing. "THEY ARE COMING," she said in an emotionless voice, "OUR GREAT ENEMY. . ." Then she collapsed. Everyone ignored her too, because Hikari always suddenly got possessed by some weirdo half-digimon thing and started glowing and talking funny. "Ooh, look! Berries!" Gomamon said. "Let's pick some to eat for dinner!" All the digimon started picking the berries to eat for dinner. "STOP RIGHT THERE!" *stupid music starts playing* "Oh my goodness! What IS that?!" Mimi shrieked as the music continued to play. "It must be Randomevilvillainbadguymon!" Taichi yelled when he saw the freaky-looking silhouette with anti-gravity tentacles that were mysteriously floating stationary in the air. "Agumon, digivolve!" *stupid music of a different kind starts playing, clashing with the stupid music that started playing before* Di-di-dididi-di di! Digimon, digital monsters, digimon are the CHAMPIONS! "Agumon, digivolve to - GREYMON!" Digimon! *the second stupid music stops playing, leaving the first stupid music to carry on on its own* ~~And no, the two 'on's were NOT a typo!~~ "I am Sailor Moon, the champion of love and justice! How dare you murder these innocent little berries; in the name of the- " "NOVA BLAST!" And Sailor Moon got incinerated to a crisp. Actually, she WOULD have gotten incinerated to a crisp, had not Sailor Mars and Sailor Jupiter jumped in front of her. "We must protect our princess, our queen and mistress and the love of our life!" was their dying 'heroic' cry. Sailor Moon burst into tears as Sailor Mercury and Sailor Venus stood with bowed heads and mourned. "WAAAAAAAAAGGGGGHHHHHH!!!!!!" "AAAAAGGGHHHHH! STOP, STOP!" the Digidestined shrieked. "She wails louder than MIMI!" Koushiro moaned. However, Gomamon was not affected by the horrible noise, because he is so cute, and cuteness is immune to injury! *Digimon stupid music starts playing again - WHAT HAPPENED TO BRAVE HEART?! THAT SONG IS THE COOLEST!* Di-di-dididi-di di! Digimon, digital monsters, digimon are the CHAMPIONS! "Gomamon, digivolve to - IKAKKUMON!" Digimon! *the stupid music stops playing* However, since Ikakkumon is definitely NOT cute (at least in the dub, which is the only thing I've seen), he was overpowered by the Serena-screams and de-digivolved back into the bundle of kawaiiness known as Gomamon. "@@@@@@@" he said. (Anime spinney-eyes, you know?) For a while everyone just stood there, the Digidestined on the ground and moaning because of the S-screams, Sailor Moon still wailing, Sailor Mercury and Sailor Venus still in mourning, and the rest of the digimon too scared to digivolve because they weren't sure if the author thought their champion levels were cute enough or not. And Sailor Moon never got up the guts to attack, because she has a disease called 'Blonde Ditz Amnesiac Syndrome', which can never be cured (judging by the fact that Sailor Moon doesn't appear to have been cured from the first season of SM to the last), and which can only be combated if a cute guy in a cape and mask who can NEVER be even CLOSE to being cute as Duo Maxwell stands on a light pole, gives a pep talk/annoying way-too-long speech, and reminds the Blonde Ditz that she HAS a weapon! Yamato, seeing his fallen harmonica lying on the ground, strained inch-by-inch to reach it; his fingers were so close; almost. . .there. . . FWSH! *black background with a flash of red that looks like either a) the color of rose petals b) blood or c) ketchup* Sailor Moon immediately stopped crying and looked up at Tuxedo Kamen, who was, of course, standing on a light pole. "Tuxedo Kamen-sama!" *Tuxie's speech music starts up* "I am Tuxedo Kamen! How dare you- " *Digimon stupid music starts playing again* Di-di-dididi-di di! Digimon, digital monsters, digimon are the CHAMPIONS! "Gabumon, digivolve to - GARURUMON!" Digimon! *the stupid music stops playing* "AAAAGGHHHH!" Tuxedo Kamen shrieked, falling off his light pole as Garurumon (who IS cute, but not as cute as Gomamon!) jumped at him. Then he started whacking at Garurumon with his cane, which was very stupid, because EVERYONE knows what happens when you hit a huge, blue and white wolf with superpowers who also happens to be the digimon of the best Digidestined kid EVER (although Koushiro's not far behind): the huge, blue and white wolf with superpowers who happens to be the digimon of the best Digidestined kid ever suddenly gets an unexplainable urge to RIP THE ATTACKER'S THROAT OUT. " *gasp* Tuxedo Kamen-sama!" Sailor Moon shrieked in horror as Tuxedo Kamen ran off into the woods, screaming, with Garurumon in hot pursuit. "Go get 'im, Garurumon!" Yamato cheered, his cool little crest thingy glowing just because it looks neat when it glows. "Sailor Moon! Use your sceptre!" Sailor Venus cried. Sailor Moon nodded. "RIGHT!" she said, over-pronouncing the word terribly. "What the heck is she DOING?!" Sora said is disbelief. Koushiro immediately snapped open his laptop and started typing. "By my calculations, it appears that she is engaging in a 30.00987 second attack sequence which requires her to - to spin around. . .and. . .fling her foot in the air. . .and- I have no idea what she's doing!" Since this little dialogue took about eight seconds, the Digidestined had 22 seconds in which to attack. "Pepper Breath!" "Super Shocker!" "Boom Bubbles *pah*!" "Lightning Paw!" "Spiral Twister!" "Poison Ivy!" This would have finished off Sailor Moon for sure, or at least wounded her a bit, had not Sailor Mercury and Sailor Venus jumped in from of her. They both got burned, zapped, boomed, zapped again, splashed, and tied up a little, but since the rookie digimons' attacks appear to have no or little effect, they only succeeded in putting the two sailor senshi out of commission instead of killing them. "WAAAAAAAAAGGGGHHHHH!" Sailor Moon started sobbing again. This time, however, Yamato was quicker than she. He grabbed his harmonica and started to play, drowning out her wails. "Good thinking, Yamato!" Koushiro called. "All right, let's get this freak!" Taichi yelled eagerly, holding up his digivice to Sailor Moon. Nothing happened. While Taichi was working on finding out what was wrong with his digivice (namely by banging it on a rock and screaming, "What's WRONG with this stupid thing?!"), the others got to work. *Digimon stupid music starts playing again* Di-di-dididi-di di! Digimon, digital monsters, digimon are the CHAMPIONS! "Agumon, digivolve (back) to - GREYMON!" Digimon! *the stupid music stops playing* *Digimon stupid music starts playing again* Di-di-dididi-di di! Digimon, digital monsters, digimon are the CHAMPIONS! "Gomamon, digivolve (back) to - IKAKKUMON!" Digimon! *the stupid music stops playing* *Digimon stupid music starts playing again* Di-di-dididi-di di! Digimon, digital monsters, digimon are the CHAMPIONS! "Palmon, digivolve to - TOGEMON!" Digimon! *the stupid music stops playing* *Digimon stupid music starts playing again* Di-di-dididi-di di! Digimon, digital monsters, digimon are the CHAMPIONS! "Biyomon, digivolve to - BIRDRAMON!" Digimon! *the stupid music stops playing* *Digimon stupid music starts playing again* Di-di-dididi-di di! Digimon, digital monsters, digimon are the CHAMPIONS! "Patamon, digivolve to - ANGEMON!" Digimon! *the stupid music stops playing* *Digimon stupid music starts playing again* Di-di-dididi-di di! Digimon, digital monsters, digimon are the CHAMPIONS! "Gatomon, digivolve to - ANGEWOMON!" Digimon! *the stupid music stops playing* ~~Okay, all the digivolving things are done now; you can stop scrolling down.~~ By the time the digimon had all digivolved, they found all their Digidestined human partners piled on Sailor Moon like it was a football game and beating her to a pulp. What had happened was that the digivolving took even LONGER (if possible) than Sailor Moon's own attack sequence, and she had already pointed her sceptre thing at Yamato, screamed the incantation, and discovered that in every dimension EXCEPT for Sailor Moon, sprinkles and glitter and little crescent moon paper cutouts don't cause much bodily harm to the target they are aimed at. "Move out of the way," the champion digimon boomed in their weirdo, deep, champion digimon voices. The Digidestined, after a couple more punches that they couldn't help, moved out of the way. "Nova Blast!" "Harpoon Torpedo!" "Electro Shocker!" "Meteor Wing!" "How about a little Needle Spray?!" "Celestial Arrow!" "Hand of Fate! HAH!" While the attacks moved, frame by frame, to seal Sailor Moon's doom, she lay there and waited for one of the Inners to jump in front of her and take the blast for themselves, or for Tuxedo Kamen to throw a flimsy little rose and stop the attacks from SEVEN CHAMPION-LEVEL DIGIMON. But of course, Tuxedo Kamen was unavailable at the moment, as was the eighth champion-level digimon, because they were off on a hunt. With Tuxie being the prey and Garuru-chan being the hunter, of course. And so, Sailor Moon finally met her demise, being blown to bits by the chosen digimon. "YAY!" everyone cheered. Just then, a holographic image appeared of an tiny old man named Gennai. "Greetings, Digidestined! I congratulate you on saving the Digiworld from its greatest threat!" "YAY!" everyone cheered again. "Of course, now you have to face Randomevilvillainbadguymon, but that should be a piece of cake if you managed to kill Sailor Moon. *shudder* " "All RIGHT! Let's go!" Taichi cheered, and everyone trooped off to go find Randomevilvillainbadguymon. And so, the day is saved, thanks to - *fwshh* The DIGIDESTINED KIDS! ~~That was supposed to be read like the narrator's ending line on 'The Powerpuff Girls'.~~ A/N: Well, not everyone died this time. . .only Sailor Mars and Jupiter! And Sailor Moon, who had to die no matter what! Of course, Tuxedo Mask is probably still running around in the woods being chased by a humongous murderous wolf, and Mercury and Venus are probably still in the hospital and racking up quite a bill. . . HAHAHAHAHA! I laugh at them! CREDITS: //Taichi! He has the pouffiest ha-ir!// ANIMATION: Catherine Bloom DIRECTOR: Quatre Raberba Winner //Yamato! He is the cu-test bishOUnen!// SCRIPT-WRITER: Raberba girl PRODUCTION MANAGER (whatever that is): Duo Maxwell //Koushiro! He is the smar-test redhead!// CHARACTER DESIGN: Trowa Barton LAYOUT: Heero Yuy //Digi-kids save the day!// (do do dodo!) EDITOR: Iria Winner PRODUCTION ASSISTANT (?): Chang Wufie //Fight-ing evil! Trying to save - the - Digiworld! Here they come with - cute - digimooooon! The DI-gi-des-tined!// PERSON WHO SAVES RABERBA GIRL FROM WUFEI FOR 'ACCIDENTLY' MISTYPING HIS NAME: Milliardo Peacecraft/Zechs Merquise //Fight-ing evil! Trying to save - the - Digiworld! Here they come with - cute - digimooooon! The DI-gi-des-tined! DIGIMON!// (do do dodo dee do!) Disclaimer: All those 'credits' were just for fun; the GW cast didn't really do all those! Of course, that should have been obvious, but there's always SOMEONE out there. . . ~_~;