From: John C. [ryutsurugi@yahoo.com] Sent: Saturday, May 05, 2001 15:18 To: cognjo@midsouth.rr.com Subject: "Ranma: The Tenth Hakkeshu" Chp. 19 Ranma: The Tenth Hakkeshu or Ranmas Cousin Iori (------) Disclaimer: I do not own Ranma =. That is property of Rumiko Takahashi. I do not own The King of Fighters, that is property of SNK. I do however suggest you look up information on these two properties. You wont be disappointed. (------) Note: This takes place after the Ranma = manga and during the King of Fighters 98. (------) Ranma the Tenth Hakkeshu Chapter 19: Pub-Crawl from Hell The scene shows Englands coastline. Fans have been waiting for days for this event. The next series of fights should have taken place, but, due to bad weather, could not. People wait in rows waiting, hoping to catch a glimpse of their favorite fighters as they walk of the boat. The site is an unexpected one. The Black Noah is in shambles. The whole top layer looks like a mesh of confetti. And there are some very deep dents in the sides of the boat. As the ship (or, whats left of it) docks, the gangplank comes down with a loud thud. Chizuru Kagura walks down the gangplank to deliver the bad news to the masses. Chizuru: We are sorry. Due to unfortunate circumstances, the fights will be delayed until further notice. This proclamation receives a collective groan from the British audience. Billy Kane walks down to try to cheer them up. Billy: Hey hey HEY! Dont look so glum chums. Tmorrow we begin again. So no bad feelings, okay gents? The audience reluctantly breaks up. A construction crew that Rugal called in over the communications wire on the Black Noah reaches the scene. They start making assessments of the damages, once the fighters are off. Rugal: How bad is it? Will my ship sail again soon? A short, fat, greasy little man hands Rugal a small piece of paper. The little man continues to smile as Rugals jaw drops upon looking at the paper. Rugal: ONE MILLION THREE HUNDRED THOUSAND POUNDS TO COVER DAMAGES!?!?!? The short contractor just nods his head as Rugal drops to his knees, and his left eye twitches uncontrollably. An all too familiar phrase echoes through the air. Rugal: THIS IS ALL YOUR FAULT RANMA SAOTOOOOMMMMEEEEEEEEE!!! (------) Most of the fighters that know Ranma, gather around him on the port where the Black Noah is docked. They start to bombard Ranma with questions. Terry: Ranma, if you dont mind me asking HOW THE HELL DID YOU LEARN NEKO-KEN!? Ranma (Defensive): Hey, its not my fault. I didnt want to train in it. Its all my dumb Pops fault. Mai: How did you learn such a terrible technique? Ranma is about to decline, when he realizes, if they try to learn it, it wont work. The trainee has to be under ten-years old. Ranma: Its like this. Pops Hand me your Advanced Combat manual. Iori (Interested): Advanced Combat? How old were you? Ranma: I was eight. Leona (Grabs Genma by his pudgy neck): YOU STARTED HIM IN ADVANCED COMBAT AT AGE EIGHT!?!? Nodoka (Unsheathes her sword and points it at Genmas gut): YOU TOLD ME HE WAS AT AGE FIFTEEN WHEN THIS HAPPENED!!! Genma tries to voice a defense, but can only make unintelligible gurgling noises, due to Leonas hands wringing his fat neck. Ranma: Please. Save your beating on him till after Im done explaining. Leona is reluctant, but she lets go of the fat martial artists neck. Nodoka keeps her sword in place to keep Genma from running off. Ranma: The training for Neko-Ken is rather simple. Take the trainee, wrap him or her in fish sausages, and throw the trainee into a pit of starving cats. All the fighters stare at Ranma. Than look at Genma hatefully. A yellow spot begins to appear on Genmas pants. Mai: POOR RANMA! At least he only did it to you once. Ranma (Without emotion): Who say anything about once? The fighters jaws drop. Kim: You mean Ranma: Yup. When I didnt learn it the first time, Pops threw me in again, tied up with dry sardines. When that didnt work, he than did it to me with slated salmon, than mackerel jerky, than fish sticks, than crab cakes, than As Ranma continues on and on with his list of stuff Genma threw him into the pit with, the anger of the female fighters just grows and grows. Apparently this story Ranma tells, recapping his Neko-Ken training has kick-started a maternal instinct. The female fighters turn towards the sight of a scared-shitless Genma. Mai: Genma you rotten Mary: No-good Vice: Useless Mature: Blundering Yuri: Idiotic King: Dumb-as-shit Kasumi Todoh: Mean Shermie: Ugly Athena: Psychotic Chizuru: Evil Leona: SONUVABITCH!!! At this point, most of the female fighters dog-pile on Genma, unleashing Special Move, after Special Move on Genmas fat ass. Yuri (Lets off a HUGE ki projectile): HAOH SHO KOKEN!!! ! Mai (Jumps into air and comes down amidst flames): CRIMSON FIREBIRD DIVER!!! ! King (Kicks Genma into air and beats on him): SILENT FLASH!!! , , , , ! Ranma: That move really isnt silent Vice (Grabs Genma and whacks him into ground repeatedly): WITHERING FORCE!!! , , , ! Leona (Grabs Genma and covers him in explosives): RYBO SPARK!!! !!! As the mushroom cloud dissipates from around Genma, we see the fat martial artist lying bloodied, burnt, bruised, and broken, lying in the center of a 4-foot deep crater. Mai: THAT WILL TEACH YOU ENEMY OF CUTE GUYS!!! All the male fighters just stare at the group of laughing female fighters. Ranma just thinks calmly to himself about what he just witnessed. Ranma (Thinks): I almost feel bad for the old panda Almost Takuma, Soun, and Saishu walk up to Genma. Takuma: You poor man. Soun: To have such an UNGRATEFUL SON! Saishu: After you go through all the trouble to teach him the ways of the art. Takuma, Soun, & Saishu: HOW WE FEEL FOR YOU! The three (possibly retarded?) martial artists help Genma to his feet. Only to be hit by an oncoming stacked bus. !!! Genma, Soun, Saishu, and Takuma go flying from the impact. Billy (Sticks head out drivers window): DAMN! I JUST HAD THIS THING WAXED!!! Geese: Billy Why are you driving a bus? Billy: Thats simple boss. If we cant fight, than why not drink? Ranma (Confused): Drink? Billy: YEAH! I own a bar here on me home-turf. I figured, if we cant have the tournament due to Rugals little pirate ship being in shambles, why not drown our sorrows in good ol alcohol? Terry: What sorrows? We pretty much hated the guy Billy: So? IT GIVES US A REASON TO DRINK! CELEBRATE!!! Most of the fighters eye Billy, but than realize, this isnt a trap. After all, HES BILLY KANE! The man that couldnt possibly come up with a good plan if his life depended on it. So grudgingly, the fighters pile on Billys bus, and take a ride to his bar. (Mostly because they have nothing better to do). Mature and Vice stay to tell Rugal of Neko-Ken. They figure that will get Rugal to keep from hemorrhaging over lost money. (------) Rugal stares at his ship, being worked on by the contractor and his crew. Rugal at this point wants to tear the Tenth Hakkeshu apart limb from limb. He has got to learn Neko-Ken, at any cost, to take revenge on the boy. Vice and Mature walk up to Rugal. Mature: Whats the matter Rugal? Rugal (Angry): Damn BOY! I cant believe he did THIS to MY ship! Vice: If it makes you feel any better, we know how you can learn Neko-Ken. Rugal (Smiles): Really? Hmm Eh heh heh Now I can have my revenge. Mature: How? You arent really going to Rugal (Interrupts): Yes Mature. I WILL LEARN NEKO-KEN! THERE IS NO POWER I CANNOT CONTROL!!! Vice and Mature stare at Rugal. A slight wind picks up. Mature (Puts hand to her mouth): Cough, cough. Orochi Power. Cough, cough Vice (Puts hand to her mouth): Cough, cough. King of Fighters 95. Cough, cough Rugal (Frowns): I hate the two of you. You know that? (------) Billys Bus comes to a screeching halt. Surprisingly, they made it to Billys bar in one piece, NO THANKS TO BILLYS LITTLE DETOUR!!! (When you consider the detour, which consisted of crashing through the gates of Buckingham Palace, and having a whole mess of guards shoot at them with automatic weapons. Only thing that saved them was that the Old Pervert Team knew the Queen Mother). Yup, very surprising indeed Billy: Okay Kiddies, were here! ACK! Mary (Strangles Billy): YOU TWISTED MOTHER F*CKING IDIOT! YOU ALMOST GOT US ALL KILLED!!! Yamazaki: Calm down Mary. I thought that was quite fun. Mary (Still strangling Billy): Fun? FUN!? YOU THOUGHT THAT WAS FUN!?!?!? Yamazaki (Nods his head): Quite. Blue Mary face-faults, dragging a Billy that has a face turning purple down with her. Yamazaki: I dont think he can survive much longer without air you know (------) Back at the Black Noah, Rugal has had the hull of the ship filled with cats. He looks at himself, and makes sure the fish sausages are properly secured. Rugal: Are you SURE this is how it works? And why is Vice holding a camcorder? Mature: To answer your questions Rugal, yes we are sure, and Vice has the camera so we can record the historic event when you learn Neko-Ken. Rugal (Smiles): Of course. This will be childs play! Rugal jumps into the hull of the ship through the opening he has on the deck, and it is automatically followed by the sounds of screeching cats, and a screaming Rugal. Vice (While recording): Hey Mature, why am I recording this? Mature: Simple. In two weeks Fox Network airs Failed Suicide Attempts. I think we cold make an easy $250 by mailing the tape of this event to them for their show. Vice (Understands): Ahhh After all, Fox has such quality programming on it. And this will add to its library of cultural footage. Mature and Vice have a good laugh while Rugal screams at the top of his lungs. Rugal: GAH, BAD KITTY, THATS A BAD KITTY!!! GAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!! (------) Mary has let up on Billy, and the fighters have started to enjoy themselves. Billys bar is actually owned by him personally. He has, not surprisingly named it Billys Bar. Ooooooooh. How original Anyway, the Lonely Wolves have taken over the pool table; there are tables and stools with fighters all around. Oh, and Benimaru has taken over the Karaoke Machine Benimaru: ALLELLUIAH, ITS RAINING MEN Kyo & Goro (Jaws dropped to the ground):  Benimaru: What? Its a classic. Kyo: I need to burn my eyes out now Goro: I lost all respect for Benimaru now Without warning four figures crash through the roof and land on a table in the center of the room. ! Takuma, Genma, Saishu, & Soun: Ow Ranma, Yuri, Ryo, Akane, & Kyo: DAD!? Ranma: Never fails. Pops ALWAYS finds a way to find me Billy: HEY, YOU FOUR BETTER BE ABLE TO PAY FOR THAT! Soun: Ill engage one of my daughters to you if you want! Akane mallets her father into the ground for that remark. Akane: STOP ACTING LIKE THE DUMB PANDA!!! Ryoga: Oh Akane, how tense you are. Let me help calm you. Shingo: Akane-chan, I will help you! Ryoga (Angry): KEEP AWAY FROM AKANE! Shingo: Why? Akane is my girlfriend. Ryoga (Angry beyond belief): WHAT!? SHINGO YABUKI, PREPARE TO DIE!!! Shingo: WWWWAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH!!! The Anything Goes Team watches this from a table in the corner of the bar. Ranma: Glad Im no longer involved with THAT Iori: Im surprised you didnt go insane with all the idiocy. Leona: Well, Ranma seems to be adaptable to me. So I can see how he was able to survive. Ranma: Yup, thats me. One good ol adaptable Ranma catches Colognes staff. Iori and Leona get up into a fighting stance. No one else in the bar notices because theyre watching the fight/massacre of Ryoga Vs. Shingo. Ranma: Problem Old Ghoul? Cologne (Annoyed): You have improved Ranma: What? No Son-in-law bit? Cologne: I do not like what youve become. Demon Ranma (Eyes narrow): Look Elder, I have gone easy on you so far. If you keep forcing me, I will NOT hold back. Cologne (Angry): And since WHEN did you develop a backbone? Ranma: Had to. Life changed on me again, so I adapted to it. (Voice turns harsh). Now listen Old Ghoul, I am SICK of you sending Shampoo after me, to kill me. I dont know WHY you want to kill me so badly now, but you are overstepping your boundary. I will retaliate the next time you attack me, my family, (Genma excluded), or my friends. Cologne (Smiles): Demon, you are two hundred years too early to defeat me. Ranma just stares at Cologne and snaps her staff in two with his thumb, index finger, and middle finger. Ranma (Smiles): You forget Old Ghoul, I had to kill an Immortal God, SOMETHING YOU COULDNT DO, for a girl I thought I loved. If I can do something like that when I am unsure of myself, what makes you think that I cant defeat you, when I actually know exactly what it is I want? Now leave. I am willing to forget the past discretions youve held against my friends and me since you took the time to train me in the past. But that was the past. Ive made up for it by not killing you when I had the chance to do so. Any more attacks, and I will not hesitate to retaliate. The hatred in Ranmas voice chills Cologne to the bone. Normally she would just destroy an inferior outsider male that would dare raise his voice against her, but she knows what Ranma says is the truth. She cant fight him head on any longer. He has become too strong. She realizes if she is to get his power, she will have to be more discreet about it. Cologne (Smiles): Very well Ranma (says the name with a hint of venom to it), I will leave you alone. There is no way I can match you now. Cologne walks away, towards where Shampoo and Mousse are standing. Shampoo looks ready to attack when Cologne says something to her in Chinese. Shampoo nods her head and the three walk away. Mousse takes one more look back, and continues on his way. Leona and Iori get back to the table and start to Ranma about her. Iori: I dont think shell leave you alone. Ranma: I know. Shes stubborn. She doesnt want to change. That will be her downfall. I think you two should be careful as well. Leona: Why us? Ranma: Cologne doesnt like being made to look inferior. She may attack you two as an indirect blow to me. Leona and Iori just stare at Ranma. From what hes told them about her, they know hes not joking (------) Back at the Black Noah, Rugal gets himself out of the ships hull Rugal: THATS IT! I QUIT!!! Rugal faints and makes a loud thud on the now refurbished Black Noahs deck. Vice: What do we do now? Mature: How much tape we got? Vice: We have five hours footage of him getting clawed, scratched, and bitten at by cats. Mature: Hmm I guess we have enough. What do you want to do? Vice: Lets go to that bar Billy was talking about. I need a drink. Mature: Sure. But do you remember what the place is called? Vice:  DAMMIT! (------) Back at the Billys Bar, things have gotten hectic. Ranma has had to beat the crap out of the Old Pervert Team at least forty four times already. (They keep attacking the ladies in the bar). Ranma: STUPID OLD MEN! ! Happosai: Ranma, HOW DARE YOU SPOIL YOUR MASTERS FUN? HAPPO FIRE BURST!!! Happosai throws more of his explosives at Ranma, only to have Ranma catch them and throw them back at the old perverts. !!! Happosai (Scorched): TRAITOR! (The old pervert faints). Mai (Waves Japanese victory fans): GO RANMA!!! Ranma: This place is a nightmare. Wheres Leona? Iori points to where Leona is. Ranma sees Leona laughing, and her cheeks seem red. Ranma: Shes drunk? Iori (Shrugs his shoulders): I guess I only saw her drink two glasses of beer. Guess she cant handle alcohol very well Iori goes back to drinking, Ranma grabs the collar of Ioris jacket, and the go up to Leona. Ranma (Grabs Leonas shoulder): I think its time we left. Leona (Surprised): Wha Oh. Hi Ranchan! Ranma: Why did you do this? I told you that you need to be alert. Being drunk doesnt cut it. Leona: Im not drunk. I had only non-alcoholic beer. I dont like alcohol, it dulls (She faints). Ranma is horrified. He extends a bit of his aura into her mug. He analyzes it and gasps in horror. Ranma: This has been drugged Cologne: Quite right Demon Ranma places Leonas unmoving form into Ioris arms, and turns to Cologne with a look of total hatred. His gaze freezes Shampoo and Mousse in place; Cologne gets a slight chill up her spine. Ranma (Angry): If you did anything to harm her permanently, Ill Cologne (Smiles): Youll what? You realize if you kill us, she dies as well. Thats in turn means you killed her. So if you do anything to harm us Ranma allows himself to smile. Ranma (Smiles): So, youve started to use your head eh? Listen and listen well Amazon TRASH! If youve done anything to harm Lechan, I swear I will hunt you all down, and burn your village to the ground with Orochi Flame. I will not leave one child of the Amazons alive. Your culture, your history, EVERYTHING, will go down in purple fire. Do you understand? Now, you can either give me the antidote to whatever you did to Lechan, or come good or bad, I WILL DRAG YOU TO HELL MYSELF! The hatred etched on Ranmas smiling visage gives Cologne no doubt. Ranma will not hesitate to kill her if she, Shampoo, Mousse, or ANY of the Amazons, should they lay a finger on him or any of those he cares about. Cologne quickly pulls out the pill, which is the antidote. Ranma snatches it from her hand, and places it in Leonas mouth. He closes her mouth, nose, and massages her throat. Leona wakes up with a cough, Ranma is greatly relieved, and lets out a breath he didnt realize he was holding. He turns to the Amazons again. Ranma: Youre lucky. If she had died, I would have killed you on the spot. Come on Iori, lets go. Iori puts Leona down and the two help Leona walk back to the ship. Leaving a visibly shaken Cologne back at the bar. (------) Ranma and crew were lucky that Vice and Mature were still there when they got back to the Black Noah, so they were able to be let on. Ranma takes Leona to her cabin, and helps her settle. Leona: Christ I cant believe they spiked my drink without me noticing. Ranma: Im just glad I was able to help you in time. If I had lost you Iori (Interrupts): If you me for anything, Ill be in my cabin. Iori gets up and walks out, leaving the two alone. Leona: Ranchan. Thank you Thank you for saving my life. Ranma: Well, I wouldnt say I saved your life That could have just been a sleeping pill or something Leona (Smiles): Liar Ranma: Yeah. It was poison. I was just so relieved that nothing horrible happened. I dont know what I would have done if you If you Leona: Well, I didnt. So come on, smile for me. Please? Ranma cant deny Leona anything. The smile automatically breaks out on his face. Not a false one, like he had on his face for the years he spent in Nerima, but one like the night he first kissed her. One filled with love. Leona: Ranchan, if its not too much, would you spend the night with me? Ranma with that statement breaks out into sweat, blushes profusely, starts talking incoherently, and just makes weird motions with his body. Leona cant help but laugh. Leona (Smiles): Not like that! I mean, just in case I need help. Like I go into a relapse from whatever that junk was Cologne put into my system. Ranma (Calms): Alright. I can do that for you. Sorry about before, but Leona silences Ranma with a kiss on the lips. After a few minutes, Ranma breaks the kiss. Ranma: Leona I Leona: What? Dont get so uptight. I love you, and you know you love me. So dont freak out about it, okay? Ranma: Sorry. Its just I dont want you to over exert yourself. You couldve died on me. And the fact that whenever stuff like this happens, I have a whole mess of people ready to beat me up because of it. Leona (Sly smile): Well, I wont beat you for it. I promise you that. Ranma: Promise? Leona (Smiles): Promise. Leona is about to kiss Ranma again when suddenly a familiar person opens the door. Ryoga: WHERE THE HECK AM I NOW!?!? I CANT FIND MY WAY BACK TO THE BAR!!! Leona (Annoyed): Must he ALWAYS DO THIS? Ranma: Yup He wouldnt be Ryoga otherwise. (------) End Chapter 19 Next Time: The Fighters finally get back from Billys Bar. And boy are they a mess! Looks like a slight vacation is in order for the fighters to get back on their feet. Send your questions and comments to either RedPriest17@aol.com or Ryutsurugi@yahoo.com. Note: Flames will be read and than used to fuel the Orochi fire. __________________________________________________ Do You Yahoo!? Yahoo! Auctions - buy the things you want at great prices http://auctions.yahoo.com/