Lina's School Of Magic
Welcome to Lina Inverse's School of Magic! ^_^
Hello. Are you tired of people picking on you? Are you sick of all the corruption in the world? Well, then you've come to the rigth place! Lina Inverse's School of Magic will not only help you with these problems, but many more! 
Not only will you become a famous sorceress (like Lina, only not as talented, pretty, gracefull...), but you will also learn Lina's special secrets like, "How To Put Food Away Like There Is No Tomorrow", "When A 'Dragon Slave' Is The Only Answer", and "How To Make Your Chest Look Bigger". This extensive 10-year class will teach you spells like the "Dragon Slave": Head me, spirits darker that dust...
Red beyond crimson flow like blood...
In the name of those reduced to dust...
I pray to the shadows...
Mark ye villians that bar our way...
And to my small strenght thine own ally...
To deliver doom, folly repay...
Come judgement from the grave...
DRAGON SLAVE!!!!!
the "Ragna Blade":
Sword of the cold dark void...
Free yourself from the heaven's bond...
Become one with my power, one with my body...
Let us walk the path of destruction together...
Power that can slash even the souls of the gods. . .
The ultimate attack spell...
One that draws its power from the lord of all dark lords, the lord of nightmares ...
The sword of darkness which can cut down the gods themselves...
RANGA BLADE!
and the "Giga Slave":
Darkness beyond blackest pitch...
Deeper than the deepest night...
King of Darkness, shining like gold upon the Sea of Chaos...
I call upon thee!
Swear myself to thee!
Let the fools who stand before me be destroyed by the power you and I possess...
Accept this darkness and obey my command...
GIGA SLAVE!
Not only has Lina found success herself, but her teachings have helped countless numbers of people. Why, she has even helped royalty. She even taught Princess Amelia Wil Tesla Saillune, warrior of justice! 
And Sylpheel, an solemn orphan of as a result of destruction by Rezo.
Due to Lina's recent lack of bandit robbing, we are offering this class to YOU, yes YOUat an introductory price of 50,000,000 gold coins, or $50,000.
*Disclaimer: This course is not real. Any attempt to send money for it will be accepted, but the buyer should know that nothing will be sent in return. Void where prohibited. Keep away from small children. Indigo Moon, the webmistress, will not take resposibility in the event of an injury. Not valid in Hawaii or Puerto Rico. Includes sales tax. Should no be taken with alcohol. Consult your doctor. Eligible for people 18 and over. Offer ends April 1, 3999. Must show legal ID. Double coupons will not be accepted. Have a nice day. :)
