By Pixie and Cherry Okay this is a stupid story about the day Krillin got pissed off at Piccolo and decided to do something about it. Sorry Piccolo... "That jerk! Why does he think it's so funny to intimidate me? Lot's of people are scared of spiders!" Krillin grumbled to himself. He shuffled along kicking up dirt with his feet. The dragon radar began to blip. He ran ahead and found the last dragon ball. "Woohoo! Eternal dragon, I summon you!" he cried. The balls began to glow and there was a big show of wind and lightning. Shenlon appeared. "What is your wish?" he asked. "I want to get back at Piccolo! He was being really mean to me! He knows I don't like spiders so he stuck one in my shoe! Then he called me a girl when I got freaked out and cried in front of everyone," Krillin said. Shenlon got a big sweatdrop. "What exactly do you want me to do to him?" he asked. "I want him to suffer a whole 24 hours of embarassment! Yeah that's it! I don't care how you do it," Krillin said laughing evilly. "It is done," Shenlong said and dissappeared again. The dragon balls scattered. "Hehehe, this is gonna be good," Krillin chuckled to himself and left. Piccolo and Gohan were sparring out in the middle of nowhere as usual. Piccolo was about to get a good shot in on Gohan when a rock fell out of the sky and landed on top of him. "Mr. Piccolo!" Gohan cried and dived down to see if his mentor was okay. All he could see was a green and pink arm sticking out. "Mr. Piccolo?" he asked. No answer. "DAAAAAAAADEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!!!!!" he screeched and raced for home. When Piccolo came to he didn't know where he was. He groaned and tried to clear the fuzziness from his vision. He was in a house lying on a soft bed with a warm blanket covering him. "Ah I see the patient is awake," a voice came. "MR. PICCOLO! YOUR OKAY!" he distinguished Gohans voice, next thing the kid was jumping all over him. "OWWWWWWW!!!!! GET OFF!!!!!!!!!" Piccolo roared in pain. "Gohan! A big rock fell on him! His ribs are probably broken!" the other voice admonished. "Oh yeah I forgot, sorry Mr. Piccolo," Gohan said climbing off sheepishly. "Hold on a second, whoever you are, what did you say happened to me?" Piccolo asked. "Humph, I've been your former enemy's wife for how long and you still don't know my name! A big rock fell on you, that's what happened. At least that's what Gohan said happened," Chi-Chi said. Piccolo turned his head to where there was a blur about the size of Gohan. "A rock fell on me?" he asked dryly. "Yeah it was so wierd! It just fell right out of the sky! Uh, why are you talking to the fern Mr. Piccolo?" Gohan asked. "I can't see! Everything's all blurry," he said. "Oh dear! We better take you to the hospital right away!" Chi-Chi exclaimed. "I'm not going to any hospital, in fact I'm outta here right now," Piccolo said and tried to sit up. He growled in pain and fell back down. "Fine, you don't have to go to the hospital but you are not leaving this house until your better. Understand?" Chi-Chi said. "Whatever," Piccolo muttered, trying not to let the stabbing pains knock him out. "Good, Gohan it's time for school," she ordered. "Aw mom! Can't I stay here and help Mr. Piccolo?" Gohan whined. "Absolutely not! You can see him after school," Chi-Chi said firmly. Bye, I'll come straight home after school to play with you!" Gohan said and left. "Swell," Piccolo said sarcastically. He shifted around trying to get more comfortable. Wait a second, something was wrong. He lifted up the blanket and saw a green and pink blur instead of the blue one that should be there. Then he yelled bloody murder. "What is it? What's wrong!" Chi-Chi exclaimed rushing in. "Where the hell are my clothes?" Piccolo demanded. "Oh! They're being washed," she said. "You undressed me???" Piccolo asked, mortified. "Yes, I couldn't very well wash them while you were still in them," she said. Piccolo could feel his face turning purple. "WELL NEXT TIME DON'T!" he roared. "Geez Piccolo, I was just trying to be helpful," she muttered and left. "Baka! Why me?" Piccolo asked nobody in particular and materialized himself a new gi. Later on Chi-Chi came in and started watching soaps. "Turn that crap off! I'm trying to sleep!" Piccolo said irritably. Was this woman going to pester him all day? Hadn't she done enough already? "Look buddy. You've beat the crap out of my husband, killed my husband, kidnapped my son and I'm kind enough to be letting you stay here. I think you can stand a little TV," she said. "You left out the part where I got killed to save your little brat's hide," Piccolo growled. "You did? Really? Oh my that's so sweet! I can't believe it..." Chi-Chi started blubbering. "Oh shut up!" Piccolo said and painfully turned onto his other side so that his back was facing her. He heard the door open and somebody come in. "Hey Chi-Chi! I'm ho..Piccolo! Your awake. Gee I didn't know you were an All My Children fan," Goku said snickering. Damn it, Goku was making fun of him! How much lower could he sink? "I'm not, your stupid wife is watching it. I can't even see the TV, I can't see anything actually," Piccolo said through gritted teeth. "Huh, that rock must've given you a really good crack on the head," Goku said. "I'd like to give you a good crack on the head," Piccolo said under his breath. Goku either didn't hear or didn't care. "Chi-Chi! I'm hungry!" Goku whined. "Give me five minutes and I'll whip something up. Anything I can get you Piccolo?" she asked. "Yeah, water," he said. The door opened again and somebody, he figured Gohan, bounced in. "Hey Mr. Piccolo! How are ya feeling?" Gohan asked jumping up and down beside the bed. "Fan-fucking-tastic. You?" Piccolo asked sarcastically. The next thing he knew he was being smacked over the head with a frying pan. "I will NOT tolerate that language in my house! Especially not in front of Gohan!" Chi-Chi scorned. Great now Chi-Chi was beating him up, how much better can this get? "Aw mom he doesn't mean it! I'll go get you some water!" Gohan bounded off to do so. "I think I can see a little better," Piccolo said rubbing his head. "Keep it up and you'll have your sight back in no time," Chi-Chi threatened and left. Piccolo didn't have a comeback so he just glared at what he was pretty sure was her back. Gohan came bouncing back in with a glass of water. Only he got a little too excited and tripped spilling water all over Piccolo. "Gohan you clumsy little shit!" he hollered. Chi-Chi ran in and swung at him with her frying pan again. "That's it! Gohan is not allowed to see you anymore, your a very bad influence! Next thing you'll get him to drop out of school and start taking drugs..." Chi-Chi declared dragging a loudly protesting Gohan upstairs. "I can't take this anymore! I'm leaving!" Piccolo said and got up, trying not to wince. "Fine! Go then!" Chi-Chi yelled from the top of the stairs. "FINE I WILL!" Piccolo yelled back. He stumbled out the door and slammed it after him. He decided that in his current state flying wouldn't be a wise idea, so he began walking. "Hey Piccolo! Are you okay? I heard about the rock," an female voice came. Piccolo swore under his breath, Bulma. "I'm fine. Go away," he said. "Uh Piccolo? Did you, er, have an accident?" she asked. Gohan had spilled the water on him in a very unflattering spot. "NO! Gohan spilled water on me," he said. "Oh...of course he did," Bulma said. Piccolo could feel his face turning purple again. He needed a quick getaway so he shot into the air...and right into a tree. The good news was he hit his head hard enough to get his sight back. "What the hell was that? Piccolo?" it was Yamcha. "You have thirty seconds to leave before I kill you," Piccolo said in a dead serious tone. "I don't know if I should leave you out here. You look drunk," Yamcha said. "What the hell are you talking about? I'm not drunk!" Piccolo growled. "Your flying into trees and you pissed your pants. I think you are!" Yamcha said. "ARGGGGHHHHH!!!!!" Piccolo didn't know how much more of this he could take. He jumped up and sped off. Once he thought he was a safe distance away he landed without hitting any trees and slumped to the ground. "Piccolo? What are you doing here?" a high pitched voice came. Damn, not Choazu! "Nothing! I was just about to leave," Piccolo said getting up. "You don't have to leave Piccolo, it's okay to be uncomfortable. Coming out is the hardest part," another voice came. Tenshinhan. Then Piccolo heard several other voices. Oh shit, no no no! "What's today?" Piccolo asked, a feeling of dread settling in his stomach. "Tuesday," Choazu said. SWEET KAMI! Tuesday was when Choatzu and Tien had their gay support group meetings! Looking to his left he saw Tien, Choatzu, Freeza, Mr. Popo, and Captain Ginyu sitting in a circle. Piccolo flew faster than he ever had before in his life... For some reason he ended up at Kame house. He snuck in through an open window upstairs and dived into a closet. "Nobody will find me in here for a while," he said to himself smugly. He half buried himself in a pile of magazines. MAGAZINES? He'd hardly come to realize the horrible truth when the door to the closet opened. "PICCOLO? If you wanted to read my hentai why didn't you just ask?" Master Roshi said. Krillin was standing behind him with a video camera. Piccolo couldn't take the humiliation anymore, he flew as far away as he could before he passed out. "Yup and I got the whole thing on tape!" Krillin bragged. "So let me get this straight chrome dome. You had to get the eternal dragon to get back at Piccolo for you? Pathetic," Vegeta sneered. He along with every single other character from DBZ were crammed into Master Roshi's living room around the TV. "Not as pathetic as Piccolo, wait until you see this," Krillin said taking the tape out of it's case and popping it into the VCR. At the same time Piccolo was talking to Shenlon. "Yes I want that special on extremely large and hairy spiders that was on last week to be on Krillin's tape," Piccolo said. "It is done," Shenlon said and disappeared. Even from far away Piccolo could hear the hysterical screams of Krillin. Piccolo smirked and went to do his meditation. |
