A Bicycle Built For 4 Part II- Where's The Bike? By: Miss ParaPara Rated: R Author's Note: Hi. Miss ParaPara here. I hope you enjoyed my first fanfic in the " Bicycle Built For 4" series. This is part two. If you haven't read part 1, go read it NOW! This fanfic is guaranteed to make you laugh. If you don't find it funny you can go suck my DIC (if I had one that is). I would like to thank Motoki for his help in the making of the bike. Well I hope you enjoy! Warning: Do not read this fanfic if you are a 100% DiC fan. I used DiC names but it contains jokes and future characters you DiC lovers would take offense to. So go get some bento and start reading! I'd also like to say that this story is a mystery. See if you can figure out who "did it " before the High Youmas do. .............................................................................. A Bicycle Built For 4: Part 2 Where's The Bike? By: Miss ParaPara email me at .............................................................................. " OK., you three remember where we parked the car." Malachite said as he and the other three high youmas stepped off the bicycle. Yes it was still the same red, four seater bicycle they drove around in. Mal had decided to take his little " kids" out for some shopping. They all wanted to go to the new shopping complex that had just opened in Juubangai. " Put down your kick stands high youmas!" ordered Mal," We don't want the car to fall over." The four put down the kick stand at the bottom of their seat. " Maybe we should leave a window down," Mal continued," It's so hot today, the car will be hot & stuffy when we come back." ' What the fuck is he talking about!' Nephlyte thought to himself, This is a bike not a car! It doesn't have windows! Malachite is nuts! " Mal," spoke up Zoicite," Let's leave the windows alone. I'm sure the bike er I mean car will be fine." She handed Jedite his diaper bag. It contained four diapers, and a couple baby bottles. Jedite, even though he was over a thousand years old, still had the tendency to "crap his pants". Malachite also thought that Jedite was still a baby (that Kunz must be nuts). The Three Lights, Seiya, Yaten, and Taiki pulled up in their Land Rover beside them. Seiya gave Jed a fruity smile. He started to sing " Search For You Love" ( a Japanese song by the Three Lights) the other two joined him. " Let me have that bag, Jed," Mal took the bag from Jed. Across the parking lot was Endust Park. Mal could see the inner Sailor Senshi and Tuxedo Mask( in their regular form, not senshi form.) Serena was eating popcorn, like a popcorn hog would. The others were reading mangas. Raye was trying to get some popcorn from Serena, but the " Rabbit" wouldn't share. Lita got tired of hearing their fight and grabbed the popcorn and threw it in a mud puddle. Serena started to eat the popcorn straight from the puddle. Mal could hear her say " It's still good. Only a little soggy!" As she was bent over the puddle Raye kicked her in the ass. Serena went face first into the puddle. 'What a retard!' Mal thought to himself. Mal looked forward to see where his youmas had run off to. He grabbed Jedite's hand when they crossed the parking lot. Nephlyte and Zoicite ran ahead and tried to push each other into traffic. " Stop that high youmas!" Mal called out to them" or I'll have to give you a spanking." Neph and Zoi stopped and ran into the store. Mal noticed people whispering around him as he approached the mall. " Hey look at the fags!" Sammy Tsukino yelled out. Mal turned around at the kid and took his hat that had " Shingo" on the front and gave it to Jed. " Hey give that back you white haired fruit!" Sammy tried getting the hat back but Jed wasn't going to let him have it. " Hey, kid why don't you go bother your sister, Sailor Moon." Mal told him. " Serena's Sailor Moon? Really. Wow!" he ran towards the park yelling " Serena's Sailor Moon!" Once inside the mall Jed asked " What's 'Shingo'?" " I think it's a baseball team, Jed. It's good for you to wear that hat to support the team." Mal replied, still holding Jed's hand. Mal apparently didn't know his Bishoujo Senshi Sailor Moon. Jed spotted Nephlyte up ahead. He was standing in a lingerie shop talking to Sailor Aluminum Siren ( who was the owner). Aluminum Siren was wearing one of the outfits she sold. Neph was feeling the material. " High youma Nephlyte!" Mal yelled to him. Neph saw him and stopped feeling up Siren. " I'm shopping on my own, Mal" he told him," I'll meet you by the front doors in two hours." " Where's Zoi?" Mal asked him. Mal noticed Siren looking at Jed and himself in a weird way. " She ran into Fish Eye and they went to look at some make up and other fruity things. Now could you leave Mal, I'm in the middle of something here." " Bye Neph" Jed waved," Me and Mal are going to the toy store." Jed and Mal walked away. " They are so weird." Neph told Siren," Now back to our plans for tonight." He put his arms around her. Siren shoved him back. " Sorry Nephlyte, but I don't want to see you anymore. You and your friends are just too weird!" " It's not me!" Neph exclaimed," Mal is nuts. He thinks we, high youmas, are his little kids. And Jedite acts like a little kid, because he's retarded. I'm not like them, but since you don't want me I'll leave." Neph left the lingerie shop in search of another woman he could lore into his bed. .................................................................. Meanwhile Mal and Jed found themselves inside of K.Rool's Toy Store. Jed ran to the girls toys. " Wow! Look Mal there's Sailor Moon dolls. Can I get one? Please!!!" Jed picked up a Chibi Moon doll. Mal looked in his wallet. Luckily he had enough money for one doll. " O.K. Jed. You deserve a treat. You have been acting more youma recently." Jed looked around at the other toys. As he rounded the next isle of the girls' section he noticed that some toys and dolls were out of their packaging and scattered on the floor. In the middle of this messy isle, Para Para sat. " Here's some more tea for you Mr. Bear." Para Para ripped open a tea set and took out a tea pot and cups. She had stuffed animals and Barbie dolls arranged in a circle around her. " What the hell are you doing!" Mal shouted when he saw Para Para and the toys, "You aren't suppose to open toys in the store. Where's your mom?" Mal grabbed Jed's hand so he wouldn't start playing in the toys. " Para Para don't have a mom," replied Para Para," Now leave me before I hurt you." She started to throw dolls at Mal. " Well, where's the ones who look after you little girl? Your leader?" Mal asked. Para Para stopped throwing dolls. " I'm not a little girl. My name's Para Para. I'm a dangerous villain from the Dead Moon Circus, the Amazoness Quartet to be exact." Para Para stood up." If you want to know who my leader is I guess it's Master Zirconia, no wait a minute it's Queen Neherenia she's the one who really runs the circus." Para Para looked at Jed. ' He looks like fun. Maybe he'll play with Para Para.' " Para Para! Get over here now!" Zirconia and the Amazoness Quartet appeared in the isle. Zirconia noticed the mess on the floor and became angry. Para Para obeyed. She followed them out of the store. " You're in shit now, Para Para." Cere Cere whispered as they left. " Why do you always act so childish?" Ves Ves asked " you make the whole Dead Moon Circus look bad." " Yeah," Jun Jun smirked," I hope Zirconia tells Queen Neherenia. Then your ass will be spanked or you will be killed. I hope you get killed." .................................................................... " Can we go to the play area next, Mal?" Jed tugged on the high youma's cape," I want to play in the balls!" Mal smiled at the thought of " Balls". He was looking forward to the day when Jed would play with real balls. But he knew Jed meant the plastic ones in the ball room. Mal looked at his watch and gasped. It was one o'clock! He must round up his high youmas and leave. He had an important meeting with Queen Baryl at two thirty. " Sorry Jed," Mal replied," it's getting late. We have to find Nephlyte and Zoicite. Maybe next time." " But I saw Rini and Hotaru here. They are going to the ball room for sure." " Now Jed I don't want you hanging around the Senshi. they're a bad influence." Mal held Jed's shoulders as he spoke to him. Suddenly Jed started to cry. " What's wrong Jed? I'm sorry but we youmas especially us High ones only hang with other youmas." " It's not that," Jed cried," I just crapped my diaper." Mal started to smell that familiar smell Jed often produced. He was glad he remembered the diaper bag. He took Jed to the women's' washroom ( It had a changing table in it), and started to clean up Jed. Before he was done Haruka and Michiru walked into the washroom. Mal was putting powder on Jed's ass. " Disgusting!" shouted Michiru, " you two gays are gross. Even Haruka & I don't do that!" " Hey your high youma bike is retarded! Let's go Mich." Haruka put her arm around Michiru's shoulders and they left. ..................................................................... Minutes later the four high youma were walking out to the parking lot. " You look different Zoi" Nephlyte told Zoi. He carried his two bags packed with items he had brought from " Chibi Adult Store." The store was so chibi that Neph practically bought everything in it. Molly would be getting a surprise in bed tonight. Zoi was pleased to see Neph had noticed her new look. She and Fish Eye had went to Urawa Ryo's ( Greg in the DiC version) new shop called "Eyebrows 4 U". Since Urawa had such thick eyebrows he opened a shop specializing in eyebrow styling and care. Zoi had her eyebrows thinned. " You look even more fruity now." Neph, for no reason smacked Zoi in the head with his bags. They started a fight, but Jed interrupted with a usual question. " Do I have to be the trunk?" Jed eyed the bags Neph & Zoi carried. He always had to be the trunk just because he sat at the back of the bike. " Of course Jed," Zoi handed him three of her bags," unless you move up a position you will always be the trunk." She did her annoying laugh, but then stopped short. " Where's the bike?" They all said at once. The bike was no where to be seen. It wasn't where they had parked it. The four high ones glanced at each other in shock. Someone had stole the bike! For a moment no one said a word. ' It's kind of good that the bike was stole' Nephlyte thought in his head,' Maybe now Mal will consider getting a car. Too bad through I had just gotten my license to drive the youma bike!' ' Now how am I suppose to get home,' thought Zoicite,' If I hadn't spent all my money at getting my eyebrows done I would have money for a cab. That's the last time I spend money to look pretty.' Mal just stared at the spot where the bike had been. He could see the tread marks on the ground leading out of the parking lot ( the parking lot wasn't paved yet). He also saw a watery fluid on the ground. ' Oh no, he thought, 'I hope the car isn't leaking transmission fluid!' " Mal," Jed tugged on the older youma's cape," I need my diaper changed again. I just made a mess in my pants." " No time for diaper changing now, Jedite," Mal looked at his three high youmas," We have to go to the police and report the bike as stolen. Come high youmas!" The four headed for the police station. .................................................................. " Mr. Malachite could you describe your automobile" the officer asked Mal. The other three stood behind him looking around at the inside of the police station. " I've told you everything. It's an 1999 four seater. Red, and fully loaded. It has a reflector on the front and back. You can clearly tell it was built and driven by a high one, namely me. The kick stand in the last seat is a little rusted and..." " Kick stand?" the officer questioned," why would your car have a kick stand?" He was beginning to think Mal was nuts. Neph went over to the officer and whispered " It's a bicycle." " A bicycle!" the officer laughed," sorry but we don't investigate stolen bikes. Now get out of here you nut cases." " Don't speak about my automobile like that!" Mal was now yelling at the officer," We don't need your help. But remember this the next time Juubangai gets taken over by the darkness." Mal stormed out of the building. The other three followed. By now it was getting dark outside and there was a chilly breeze in the air. " Mal I'm cold," Zoi whined," How are we going to get home?" Mal turned to his youmas. They seen a look they had never seen before from Mal. Fear. " I know a cheap hotel we could spend the night. We have no other way back to the Negaverse," he told them," In the morning we must investigate this matter. We need our bike back." '' Why can't we just teleport back to the Negaverse. We always did that before that stupid bike came along'' Neph whispered to Zoi. .................................................................... " So where do we start looking?" asked Zoi. The four high ones were finished their breakfast at the hotel restaurant and it was time for The Investigation. " Let's question all groups of four. They are most likely to have taken the bike because there are four seats" Neph suggested. He scratched his balls and stretched.. " Good idea, Nephlyte." Mal got out a piece of paper and a pen," O.k. name me groups of four." " The Sailor Scouts. Inners & outers." said Zoi. " The Amazoness Quartet." said Neph. " The Sailor Anima Mates". Mal wrote vigorously. " The Four High Youma" exclaimed Jed. The other three looked at him with sweatdrops on their foreheads. Mal ordered Jed to stand up, then kicked him hard in the ass. Jed sat down and went silent. " Let's go high youmas. Let's see those Sailor senshi first". They followed Mal. ..................................................................... Meanwhile at Raye's shrine all the Senshi ( inners & outers) were just hanging around. Mina was trying to give Artemis a bath in a tin pan, while he used his " Artemis Cat Claws Dig!" on Mina's flesh and ran out of the pan. " Get back here you fuckin' cat or I'll get your balls removed!" She chased the white cat around the yard. Lita, Raye, and Serena were eating homemade blueberry muffins Lita had baked up. " That last ones mine" Serena reached for the last muffin at the same time Raye did. " Paws off meatball head!" Raye tried to get the muffin from Serena," You had enough. You're getting fat." " You're one to talk, Raye. I heard you talking to Luna about you ripping the ass out of your sailor suit." " Well Darien likes my ass. He asked me out for this weekend." Raye exclaimed. " You slut leave my Mamo- chan alone!" " You don't even know what version of SM this fanfic is, do you." " Nobody knows. The author keeps switching back and forth. I thought this story was about the four high youma and their missing bike, but we keep hogging the plot. At this rate they'll never get their bike back. Now give me that stupid muffin Odango, so this story can progress." While this fighting continued, Setsuna snuck up on the two and snatched the muffin. She stuffed it in her mouth and swallowed. " Setsuna!" Raye & Serena exclaimed, large sweetdrops formed on their foreheads. Setsuna smiled and ran into the shrine. " Need more muffins!!! I never eat in the anime, except ice cream. I need muffins!!!!" " Fuck," Raye cried," Now she's going to tear apart my cupboards till she finds muffins." Meanwhile Mina was still chasing Artemis. He jumped into Rini's arms. " Hi Artemis." She & Hotaru started patting Artemis. " Hold him for me guys" Mina ordered. She ran towards them. " I got worms!" Artemis told Rini. Rini dropped the cat, and he ran off. Michiru saw Mina chasing Artemis. " Deep Submerge!" she aimed her attack at the white cat. Artemis was soaked. " He's got his bath now." Michiru exclaimed and went back to playing her violin for Haruka and the Three Lights. Seiya kept starring at Michiru. A bulge was forming in his pants. " When are the four high ones going to show up this fanfic's getting boring" spoke up Amy. She looked up from a boring physics book she had been reading. " We're here." All the girls turned to see the four high youmas standing before them. Michiru stopped playing the violin. " This could be trouble," Luna informed the girls," I think you better transform." " Good idea Luna." Serena replied. She and Rini opened their moon compacts and shouted " Moon Crisis Power, make up!" " Mars Crystal Power, make up!" " Venus Crystal Power, make up!" " Mercury Crystal Power, make up!" " Jupiter Crystal Power, make up!" " Saturn Planet Power, make up!" " Neptune Planet Power, make up!" " Uranus Planet Power, make up!" " Fighter Star Power, make up!" " Maker Star Power, make up!" " Healer Star Power, make up!" The Sailor Senshi stood in their super senshi form ( well except for the Starlights). " We didn't come for a fight," Mal explained. The youmas stepped closer to the senshi. " Sure you didn't. Jupiter Oak Evolution!" Jupiter threw her attack at the youmas and hit Jed. Jed fell to the ground and started to cry. " How dare you!" Mal exclaimed," Kunz Condom Tie up!" A large condom enclosed the senshi and tied up so they couldn't get out. " No rubber can stop me," Uranus shouted," World Shaking!" The attack didn't have any effect. " Let me try. Deep Submerge!" The condom filled up with water. " Oops sorry," Neptune said. " Thanks a lot stupid," yelled Sailor Star Healer," Now we're all going to drown." " Don't yell at her, Yaten." exclaimed Sailor Star Fighter. " Face it Seyia. You are really a girl. This male form is just a cover up to find Princess Kakayru. Stop being a fruit." " We are all going to die!" Sailor Moon started her usual crying. " Sailor Moon I love you." Mercury started to feel up Moon. " Gross! Get the hell off me Amy!" Moon threw her off. Sailor Chibi Moon got on her knees and pulled out her Crystal Carillon. " Pegasus please help us." She held up the carillon, " Twinkle Yell!" Out of nowhere Pegasus came flying. He didn't have time to give Sailor Moon her Moon Keleid Scope, because he was hit by Nephlyte's Starlight attack. Pegasus fell to the ground and was dead. " You fucker!" screamed Sailor Saturn," I'll kill you." She raised her Silence Glaive and shouted, " Silence Glaive Surprise!" Her attack didn't have any damage on the condom. " But I'm suppose to be the strongest senshi. We're all going to die." She started crying like Serena. " What about Tuxedo Mask?" spoke up Sailor Venus. " He's not coming," cried Moon," We broke up again last week and he said he would never help the senshi again." " We don't need a weak fruit like him anyway," Sailor Uranus exclaimed, "Where's Sailor Pluto?" Just then Pluto came running out of the shrine. " Sorry, I'm late guys," she explained," But I was making muffins. I'll set you free." She raised her Garnet Rod, " Dead.." " Setsuna, the muffins are done" Grampa's voice came from inside the shrine. Setsuna lowered the rod. " Yum muffins! I'm coming!" She ran to the shrine. " What about us?" Sailor Star Maker shouted to her. " I'll get you guys out in a while. But I have to go now. The muffins are calling me." She went inside. " I'll make a deal with you senshi." Mal told them." You help us find our bike and we'll let you live." " O.k we agree to help you now let us OUT!" The condom disappeared and the senshi could all breathe again. But now they had to help the youmas. Oh well. .................................................................. " So, what makes you think we took your stupid bike." Sailor Lead Crow demanded. The senshi and Starlights were gathered at Ginga TV to question the Sailor Anima Mates about the bikes' disappearance. The four high youmas came along to make sure the senshi did their job. " Where were you last Friday evening?" Sailor Moon asked. " Well," spoke up Sailor Tin Nyanko," I was following Lead Crow around ruining her plans to get star seeds. But unfortunately she managed to get that thick eye- browed nerd, Urawa Ryo. He's probably dead now. We had his star seed for a couple days." She started to stare at Nephlyte's dick. " Is it a big DiC?" she asked him. " Not for you ugly." He walked over to Aluminum Siren. They left for Siren's bedroom to " talk". " I didn't take your bike," Sailor Iron Mouse protested when questioned at glaive point by Saturn," I was working at my new bakery. You can even ask Sailor Pluto. She was there purchasing blueberry muffins." Everyone turned to Pluto who nodded in agreement and stuffed another homemade muffin in her mouth. " Can I have one Setsuna?" asked Moon. " Fuck you make your own!" Pluto held the bag close to her body to protect it from the hungry Odango Atama. Jed tugged on Mal's cape. The big youma looked down. " Can you change my diaper, Mal? You haven't changed me in two days. Neph & Zoi are beginning to complain about the smell." Jed had tears in his blue eyes. " Sorry Jed, but there's no time. We must keep looking for the bike." Mal replied with a cold expression on his face. He was taking this bike disappearance too hard. " I can change him," spoke up Sailor Neptune," I do have experience from changing Hotaru." Jed didn't want this at all. " No," he cried," Only Mal sees my penis." " If I had a diaper, would you change me Michiru?" Star Fighter smiled a perverted smile. Sailor Uranus heard this and beat the shit out of him. " Leave my lesbian lover alone." She pulled out her Space Sword and sliced off Fighter's breasts. Moments later Nephlyte & Siren return with big smiles on their faces. " Well the guilty one isn't here. Let's keep looking." Mal turned to the group of senshi and youmas. They all leave to arrive next at the Dead Moon Circus. .................................................................... " Para Para didn't take your bike!" Para Para protested." I'd rather play and have fun than ride a bike." She sat on the floor and continued playing with her dolls. Jed joined her. " Where were the rest of you when the bike was stolen?" asked Jupiter," From what the youma tells you were at the mall on that day and came in contact with the high ones." " Yeah we were at the mall," admitted Cere Cere," Jun Jun, Ves Ves, and I were shopping for make up. Jun Jun was also suppose to be baby-sitting Para Para. We found the baby down in the toy store where she was confronted by you." Cere Cere nodded her head at Mal. " When we left the mall we went to the Amazon bar to join the Amazon Trio for drinks. I of course had a date with Tigers Eye." Cere Cere stretched out on her pool table bed ( they all slept on pool tables. Don't ask why.) " I was with Hawks Eye." added Ves Ves," Fish Eye wouldn't go out with Jun Jun because he's gay and mostly because she's too ugly. With those green balls coming out of her head who wouldn't be scared!" " You little bitch!" exclaimed Jun Jun," I'll kill you. I'm way prettier than any of you." " Stop fighting!" yelled Para Para," Why don't you all join Jed and Para Para in a tea party. We can pretend this juice is tea." Para Para noticed Pluto eating muffins. ` " Can we have a couple muffins for the party, please?" " Never!" Sailor Pluto ate the last muffin," Let's get going. I'm out of muffins." As they left the circus tent, Mal sat on the ground and started to cry. All the senshi gathered around him and tried to be a comforted. It was very dark outside by now. " We'll never find the car at this rate." he cried," I want my car back so bad." Just then in the distance a car was approaching. It's headlights were very bright and blinded everyone for a moment until it passed. When they got their vision back, they found a piece of paper on the ground. It was addressed to Mal. " Meet me at the Juubangai dock right now if you ever what to see your bike again. Sincerely, The Bike Thief " Come on guys," said Sailor Moon," We got him this time." They all ran to the dock. ...................................................................... " He's probably hiding." said Sailor Mars, when they reached the deserted dock. " I'll do a scan with my computer." Sailor Mercury scanned the area for the bike or a person, but Zoicite found the bike first. " There it is." She pointed to the far side of the dock. Behind a create was the bike shining in the moonlight. " Looks like a trap." Sailor Mercury said. " You got that right blue haired nerd." Everyone looked to where the voice came from. A shadowy figure stepped out into the moonlight. It was... " Andrew?" Sailor Moon exclaimed. " You took the bike? Why?" asked Sailor Chibi Moon. Andrew came closer to them. He was still wearing his arcade clothes. " Do you youmas remember in " A Bicycle Built For 4" part 1. One of you fuckers threw a ice- cream at me. Before I could get my revenge, that blond fruit," he pointed at Jed," Farted and I had to let go of the bike or I could die from those fumes. As you speed away on the bike I yelled that I would get my revenge someday. And so I did. I'm not giving the bike up." Andrew grabbed hold of the bike. " Then we'll have to fight you for it. Come on guys let's all team up against him." Sailor Moon ordered. " Mars Flame Sniper!" " Mercury Aqua Rhapsody!" " Venus Love & Beauty Shock!" " Jupiter Oak Evolution!" " Pink Sugar Heart Attack!" " Dead Scream!" " Deep Submerge!" " World Shaking!" " Death Reborn Revolution!" " Star Serious Laser!" " Star Gentle Uterus!" " Star Sensitive Inferno!" " Nephlyte Starlight Attack!" " Zoi!" " Jed Diaper Smell!" " Mal Balls Attack!" " Moon Gorgeous Meditation!" All the attacks hit Andrew at once and forced him off the dock and into the water. The four high youma grabbed the bike, got on and pedaled off. " Aren't you going to thank us?" Star Fighter shouted after them. " No way!" Mal shouted back," That wouldn't be a youma thing to do." " We helped them for nothing!" Saturn was getting mad," Let me kill them." She raised her Silence Glaive and was going to end the whole world until Uranus stopped her. " Don't Hotaru. I'll give you some ice-cream when we get home." " I want muffins!" Pluto whined. " You'll get your muffins too." Uranus hoped she had a lot of money for these groceries. Meanwhile the Starlights helped Andrew out of the water. He looked pretty beaten up. Minutes later an ambulance took Andrew to the hospital. " Good thing Andrew doesn't know who we really are," Moon sighed," If he did I'd never be allowed in the arcade again." " You guys want to go get something to eat?" spoke up Venus. " Good idea." They all left for Fruits Parlor Crown. ..................................................................... Back in the Negaverse Mal was giving Jed a bath. And boy did he need one! " Mal are you happy to get the bike back?'' Jed asked. Mal smiled. " Yes I'm very happy. You might even say I'm feeling a little gay." Mal grabbed Jed's penis and started stroking it. ...........O.k this is getting a little hentai so I should stop 4 now................... ...................................................................... Did you like it? . I hope you didn't mind that I switched back & forth between the Japanese version and the DiC version. It was met for humor purposes. Remember you can reach me at . Suggestions for part three of this series are welcome. I still want pictures of the 4 high youma on the bike. Please draw me some fan art! Also if you know of any funny Sailormoon fanfics please e-mail me. Thanks. Bye 4 now! -Love Miss ParaPara For more of my fics go to Motoki's SM Page at