He sat there, watching his life...... his world........his
heart.......coming falling down, crashing into a million pieces. His words
did all that had happened. It was all his fault. He knew it, and accepted
it.
Matt looked on at his fallen comrade. Tai. \“Aw god....”\ Tai lay next to
him, his breathes came in short, sharp, intervals. His face was so pale, so
unnatural for him. He looked so pained, not just from the physical pain but,
from something else.
Matt’s eyes trailed down his body, observing him. His body was so battered.
His arms had cuts everywhere, one impractical, that cut from his elbow. It
went half way up his arm to his shoulder. His legs where covered with tiny
scratches here and there, but nothing to serious.
He sighed, looking back at his face. The worst of all the cuts had happened
on his head. The gash went from the top of his left eye to his hair line. It
wasn’t deep, but deep enough for him to lose enough blood to.... no! He
could think such thoughts. Those were the thoughts before he found Tai. They
were a curse! Every single one of those words
were a curse!
He brought his legs up to his chest, laying his head on them, pointing away
from his friend, looking at the same campsite they were at before they found
Tai.
The trees colors had darkened, to him. The ponds blue water had turned
dark, almost black. The sun came nowhere near him. Never giving him light to
see, or be guided by. He felt so lost, so.... alone. Sure there was Izzy,
Joe, TK, Mimi and Sora, and not to mention the Digimon, but... this was
different. When Tai had fallen, it felt like his heart had been ripped right
out of his chest. Like part of his soul had lost him. Like he’d never be
complete again.
“Please be OK.” he whispered to Tai.
“Matt?”
He lifted his head up, turning it to see who was speaking to him.
Sora stood before him, worried written all over her face. She kneeled down
on both knees, looking at Matt.
“Y.... yes?”
“Will you please take a walk with me, I need to talk to you.”
“Fine.” He pulled himself off the ground walking over to Sora, who now
stood there with him.
“Thanks.”
They began to walk off, into the dark forest. Matt didn’t even bother to
look at Sora. He occupied his vision by the ground passing beneath his feet.
The blur of brown and green clashing together, along with a few twigs here
and there, barely catching his sight.
Suddenly Sora stopped, refusing to let Matt pass her. She gripped him by
the shoulders making him face her. Matt looked into Sora’s eyes. They were
stern yet comforting. The hard edge to them took over and the comfort gave
way being pushed back. Sora starred at him, not in hatred but in anger.
“Matt, this has gone long enough.”
“What are you talking about?” He tried to conceal the fact, but nothing
could get past Sora. Nothing.
“You know what I’m talking about. Why are you blaming yourself, for what
happened to Tai? You know it isn’t your fault, that he got hurt. You have to
realize it.”
Matt pushed her firm grip off of his shoulders, turning his head to a tree
next to him, starring at it like there was nothing else. “You’re wrong.” He
whispered.
Sora strained he hears to listen. She didn’t like the answer. “MATT! What
if Tai saw you like this? You can be sure he wouldn’t approve it. Why do you
torture yourself like this? You know, as well as I know, that it isn’t your
fault.”
“No Sora, it is my fault. If I won’t have said those words to him, he would
have never of left us....... me.” Matt turned back to Sora looking straight
in her violet eyes. He couldn’t describe it. So many emotions were there.
One stood out the most. Anger. Her eyes were flaming. “I know what I did,
and I accept it. You should to.”
“NEVER!” She lost it. She tried to hold her temper but it was no use. She
blew her “cool”. “Wake up, Matt! Didn’t you notice that Tai was going to
leave no matter what? One more fight would have sent him over the edge, even
if that last one didn’t. He couldn’t take the stress from his friend.
Couldn’t you see it? See it in his eyes? There was so much hurt in them,
full of anger, sorrow and everything else you could imagine. What you saw
from him was nothing. I have always been there for Tai and he’s shown me
every emotion that I wanted to see. That was just one, and only one. He was
happy. He never had to tell me what he felt. I just knew. You were hurting
him, by those words.
You knew it too, huh?” Matt closed his eyes, giving a small nod.
“Then why did you keep it up? If you knew then why? Why did you hurt him?”
He gaze never left him, still holding firm, no matter what happened.
“I... I... I really don’t know. My pride........ my ego........ I just
can’t pin point the exact thing though. I really never ment to say those
words to him..... honestly I didn’t. They came out before I could even begin
to think. My anger took control before I could do anything about it.”
“Oh Matt, you should have never of hid your feelings for Tai.” Matt was
shocked. How did she know?
“Wha??.... who??...... how??” He couldn’t even think of the words. Sora
gave a small smile, letting her anger diminish.
“I knew from the way you acted around him. I’m very observant, toward
others. The world and people around me are fascinating, so I watch. That’s
why I can get along with everyone. I observe and I learn. I watch you and I
see and lost boy, trying to figure out his way. The light was taken from
him, when that special someone left.”
“You watch that much?”
Sora nodded her head. “Listen to me, and listen well. You found the light
don’t let it go. Say what you’ve wanted to say, and take it from there. From
then on, only you and he can figure out your future.”
“But...... he’s still unconscious. How can I tell him like that?”
“Like you’ve always wanted to. When he wakes up, let him talk but shut him
up, long enough for you to speak.”
“Sora?”
“Yes, Matt?”
“Thank you.”
Sora gave a bright smile. “Anytime for a friend Matt. Anytime.” She moved
forward, putting her arms around Matt’s shoulder, giving him a warm hug.
Pulling back she began to walk back, toward the camp, Matt following
shortly afterward.
When they got back, the sun was setting, making the small pond shimmer from
the gold rays, bouncing off. He looked around at everyone. Mimi, TK, Izzy
and Joe sat next to the camp fire cooking some fish and each having a fresh
fruit next to their feet, along with all the Digimon.
He saw Sora join them, waving for him to come and sit. He did just that,
walking over and sitting himself down next to TK and Patomon. He picked up a
unused stick and a raw fish. He pushed the stick through the tail of the
fish and to the mouth, sticking the
other end of it in the ground, so he wouldn’t have to hold it.
“So Joe, how’s Tai doing today?”
“His wounds are healing, nicely but he still shows no sign of waking up,
Izzy.”
“Oh. Do you think he’s just resting?” Mimi asked
“Hard to tell. He just might be. He’s lost a good amount of blood, so
that’s probably why he can’t wake up. We’ll see soon enough.”
“Joe, you’re a good doctor.”
Joe’s cheeks redend a little, from TK’s comment. “Thanks TK, but I’m not a
real doctor you know.”
“I know, but if you can bandage that good then you MUST be a good doctor.”
“Hehehe.” He put his hand at the back of his head, blushing more. “It was
nothing at all, don’t worry.” He smile at the younger boy, who smiled back.
Matt smiled at seeing TK. The boy looked up to everyone. He couldn’t help
but give a small grin. He picked up his fish, deciding it was done and began
to slowly munch on the hard meat.
“So Matt, why are you being so quiet?” Mimi asked.
“Oh. No reason, just thinking.”
“OK, whatever. Ya know what I heard?”
“What?” Sora asked
“That thinking gives you wrinkles. EEEWWW!!!! I’m never going to think
again.” The group burst out in a laugh.
“Mimi, you have to think once in a while.” Izzy commented, still grinning.
Mimi narrowed her eyes at the shorter boy. “And who said I had to, Mr.
Smartie-pants? I can’t have my face drop to the floor when I begin to think!
That’d be HORRIBLE!!” The group began to laugh again, this time harder than
before.
Matt clutched his side, from the pain in his stomach, from laughing so
hard. “OK, OK. Mimi, from now on, you are to never think. That good for
you?”
She smiled and nodded her head. “I guess so, but I have to think when I do
important stiff.”
“And what might that be?” Sora chimed in.
“DUH! Go shopping of course!”
Matt cracked another smile but didn’t laugh aloud again, for his sides
still hurt from the previous statements.
“Well guys, I think it’s about time we go to sleep. I’ll take first watch
and I’ll wake Joe up. Izzy can do a shift and then Sora can finish the
night. Sound OK?”
“Sure Matt.”
“I don’t mind.”
“OK.”
“G’night, Matt.”
“Night TK.”
“C-ya in the morning everybody!”
“Night Mimi.”
Matt got up and walked over to Tai, with Gabumon by his side, leaning
against a tall tree a little bit away from where Tai lay. He watched as the
moon’s rays came upon Tai’s face, washing over his pale face like a blanket
of silk. His face looked more alive
then it had ever since the day Dubarenmon had him.
“Something wrong?”
“Huh? Oh no, Gabumon, nothing’s wrong.” He gave the furry Digimon a small
smile to prove his words.
“OK.” He gave a long yawn, smacking his lips together tiredly.
“You can go to sleep if you want to Gabumon.”
“Are you sure?”
“Yeah, I’m not tired at all. I think I can handle it. Go ahead.”
“Well, OK.”
“See you in the morning Gabumon.”
“You too Matt.” Gabumon walked over to where Agumon and Gomamon lay and
slept next to them.
Matt gave a small sigh. He was alone. Just the way he liked it. He walked
over and sat next to Tai, taking Tai’s gloved hand in his. He gave a gentle
squeeze, not expecting a response. Of course he never got one.
“I wish I could tell you right now. The moment is perfect. There’s no one
to mess it up..... except for me. I know I’m not good at showing anything to
you, but I just wish I could do this right. It seems that I just can’t place
my words, that’s all.” he lowered his
head looking at the dark ground. His hand never left Tai’s.
His eyes slid closed but not for long. He had to keep watch. He opened his
eyes again, but to something new. He looked at his hand, still connected
with Tai’s. But something was different. /“But what?”/
Suddenly he found out the reason. A slight pressure was being put on his
hand. It wasn’t his either. He looked down at the pale boy laying before
him. His eyes where half way open and staring into Matt’s, like he was
searching his soul.
“T... T... Tai? Oh..... my... go.... god.” He couldn’t find the words. This
was unreal! One minute Tai’s sleeping like there’s no tomorrow and the next
he’s awake starring at me!
“Hello..... to you..... too man.......” He gave a small smirk on his face,
trying to hide the pain, but it didn’t go over to well.
“Is this a dream? Yeah, I’m dreaming that’s it. I’ll wake up and you’ll
still be laying there like a zombie.”
“Don’t brush me off as a dream you ass.” Tai struggled to get up, using
Matt’s hand as support. Hehe, what support. Matt was to shocked to even
help.
A sharp pain when through Tai’s left leg making him collapse back down to
the ground, groaning in pain.
“TAI!” Matt shook of the effects of seeing Tai awake and held his hand
tighter, so as to softer the hard landing.
“Ohhhhh...... crap, that hurts.” He winced from the pain in his leg. Matt
let go of Tai’s hand scooping him up into his arms. “Hey!”
“Don’t worry, I’m just moving you somewhere else.” Matt carefully got up
from the ground and walked over to the tree he was leaning on, just a little
bit ago. He gently began to set Tai down on the ground, letting him put his
back on the base to keep him up.
“There. Better now?”
“Sure.” Tai said dryly.
“Tai, I need to apologize.”
“Huh?” Tai looked totally confused. /“Why would he apologize to me? I’ve
just seen him in what? 3 months? I don’t remember, but what’s he trying to
say. Could it be for what happened 3 months ago?”/ Tai dismissed the
thought. Why would he try to pretend to apologize when he knew he wouldn’t
mean it. Matt was utterly pathetic. He tore his gaze way from Matt’s face
and looked at the ground.
“Tai, please look at me. This is important.”
“Why? So You can tell me you hate me, closer up this time? I don’t think
so! Forget it. Just leave me alone, I’m better off without you.” Those words
struck Matt right in the heart. ‘I’m better off without you.’ His chest felt
like there was an anvil on it,
weighing him down from saying anything.
Matt began to force the words from his mouth. “I can’t. I have to say this,
now or you may never know.” Tai looked up from the ground, looking straight
at Matt. /“That voice. I’ve heard it before. That’s the voice he uses with
TK. Such love in there.”/ Tai kicked himself mentally. /“What am I
thinking?? He hates me, he said so himself.
Wishful thoughts are nothing but trouble.”/
“You remember what I said to you, about hating you? I never meant them,
Tai. I could never hate you.” Tai sat there stunned from what was said.
“Y-y-you, don’t? Then why did you? I mean.... I...... Why?”
“I wasn’t thinking. They came out before I even got a chance to think about
what that might do. I’m sorry. I truly didn’t mean them. I wouldn’t blame
you, if you hated me, for what I did.” A solitary tear ran down Matt’s
cheek.
“Oh, Matt.” Tai flung his arms around the blonde’s neck, tilting his head
to one side and placing it on Matt’s shoulder.
Matt was stunned. First Tai can’t stand him, then he’s hugging him. “Tai?
Are you OK? I mean......” Tai pulled away, two tears streaked down his
cheek. Matt brought his hand up and gently brushed them away.
“Thank you, Matt. You don’t know how much that means to me. Thank you.” Tai
gave him a small smile.
“I have something else to tell you to.”
“Huh? What?”
“That.... um.... er.... I don’t know how to say this. I’m not very good
with my words.” Matt began to blush furiously.
“Matt, before you say anything, let me tell you something.”
“What?”
“I love you. I have for a long time now, I was just afraid you'd hate me.
Believe me.”
“Y-y-you do?” Tai slightly nodded his head, castling his gaze to the forest
ground. /“No no no NO! He’s not saying anything. Maybe he just wanted to be
a friend. OH, I’m so stupid. Now I blew it.”/ Tears began to poor out of his
eyes, quietly sobbing his heart out. He pushed away from the dazed blonde,
pushing himself flat against the tree behind
him.
Matt shook his head clearing his mind. He found Tai pulling away from him
and pressing himself against the tree. /“Matt you idiot! He just poured his
heart out and you just sit here like a kid how just got smacked for stealing
a cookie from the cookie jar. Get a hold of your self!/ Matt slid further up
to Tai. He finally detected the soft sobs coming from the other boy. He
reached out and wrapped the boy in his arms, pressing his head against his
chest.
“Shh, it’s OK, I’m here. I won’t leave you.” He began to rock Tai back and
forth soothing his sobs. /“Here’s your chance, go for it.” Matt pulled Tai
away from his chest, picking up his chin with his hand, making him look into
his eyes.
“Tai...... I... I love you, too. I’m sorry I didn’t say it sooner, I didn’t
want to make you cry, honest. Please, give me a chance.”
“Are..... are you sure?”
“Yes. What I said back then was my pride speaking, not my heart. Please
forgive me.”
“For what?”
“Hurting you. Making you leave. It’s all my fault.”
“Matt, that Digimon that had me was not your fault. Don’t blame yourself.
I’m OK and I’m with you. That’s all that matters to me. Just promise me one
thing.”
“Anything.”
“Promise me you’ll never leave me.”
"Why?"
"Please, Matt."
“OK. I promise.”
“Thank you.” Tai closed his eyes and nuzzled into Matt’s chest, letting the
sleep over come his body.
“Sleep well, my angel. Sleep well.” Matt bent down and kissed Tai on his
forehead, tightening his protective embrace on the chestnut haired kid,
forever and more.
*******************
*Author* HAHAHAHA!!!!!!! I'm DONE!! YES!! *jumps around* Thank you, thank
you, thank you! *stops and becomes serious* OK sorry this took me awhile but
I've been real busy. I busted my rear getting this LAST one done. I hope you
like it. Thanks to all of those how wrote to me saying you liked it, that's
the really only reason why I continued. ^_^ ^_^
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