You’re Lost Between Generation X and Baby Boomers If…..
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You remember when Jordache jeans with
a flat-handle comb in the back pocket were cool.
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Any photograph of you shows you wearing
an Izod shirt with the collar turned up.
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You know any “Weird Al” Yankovic songs
by heart.
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You’ve ever run someone’s doorbell and
said “Lanshark!”
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You were once bowled over by the technological
excellence of such products as Atari, IntelliVision, telStar and Coleco.
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You remember the premier of MTV- or
worse yet, you remember its predecessor, “Friday Night Videos.”
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You and your friends ever discussed
having a reunion at the end of the century and playing Prince’s “1999”
until you passed out partying.
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A predominant color in your childhood
photos is plaid.
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You remember when music that was labeled
‘alternative’ really was alternative, and when ‘alternative comedy’ was
really funny.
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You took family trips BEFORE the invention
of the minivan.
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(Related to No. 10) You rode in the
back of the station wagon facing the cars behind you.
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You’ve recently horrified yourself by
using any one of the following phrases: “You know, back then…., “When I
was your age…,” or “When I was younger…”
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Schoolhouse Rock played a HUGE part
in how you learned things like grammar, math, and history. (A big
hint here is if the only way you can recite the Preamble to the Constitution
is by singing it.)
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You ever dressed to look like someone
in a Madonna, Cyndi Lauper or Duran Duran video.
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You remember your first kiss with someone
having happened while either “Leather and Lace” or “crazy for You” was
playing.
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You remember with pain the day the Green
Machine hit the streets (or the sidewalks), instantly making the Big Wheel
obsolete.
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The age-old question “Where’s the beef?”
still makes you laugh.
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You remember when film critics raved
that no movie could ever possibly have more advanced special effects that
“TRON”.
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You had a crush on Ted the photographer
on “Love Boat”, Gage from “Emergency”, or Ponch from “CHIPS”.
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You hair at some point in time in the
‘80s could only be described by saying “I was experimenting”.
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You’ve ever shopped at Benetton.
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You’re starting to believe that having
the kids in school year-round wouldn’t be such a bad idea after all.
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You’re currently employee doing something
that has absolutely nothing to do with your college major.
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U2 is too popular and mainstream for
you now.
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You remember trying to guess which episode
of “The Brady Bunch” it was by the first scene.
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You had a front-row seat (i.e., blew
off one or more classes) for Luke and Laura’s wedding on “GH”.
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Your parents wanted you to attend medical
school, but you decided it was pointless since Quincy got all the babes
anyway.
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You know who shot J.R.
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You recall when Love’s Baby Soft was
in every girl’s Christmas stocking.
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This rings a bell: “My name is Charlie,
and they work for me.”
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You were unsure if Diet Coke would ever
catch on. (Related item: you were sure that “New Coke” would NEVER catch
on.)
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You know all the words to the double-album
set of “grease” soundtrack.
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You ever had a Dorothy Hamill haircut.
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You sat with your friends on any given
Friday night circa 1982 and dialed 867-5309 to see if Jenny was actually
there.
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“All Skate, change directions” means
something to you.
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You’ve ever owned a pair of rainbow
suspenders like the ones Mork used to wear.
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You bought a pair of Vans and wanted
to order a pizza in history class so you could be just like Jeff Spicoli.
(Related item: if you’ve ever smacked yourself in the head with a shoe
and exclaimed, “I’m so wasted!”
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You owned a Preppy Handbook.
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You were too young to see “Blue Lagoon,”
so you just had to settle for the second-hand reports.
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You remember when movies were only PG
and R.
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You learned to swim at about the same
time “Jaws” came out… and still carry the emotional scars to prove it.
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You remember when you cable TV by had
a sliding selector switch… and your “cable remote” was connected to the
TV by a cord!
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Your jaw would ache by the time you
finished one of the brick-sized packages of Bazooka.
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You remember Bo and Luke Duke, Daisy,
Boss Hogg or - worst of all what Sheriff Roscoe’s full name was.
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Your parents paid $2,000 for top loading
VCR that was almost the size of a coffee table.
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You found nothing strange about Bert
and Ernie living together.
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You remember having a rotary phone.
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You actually believed that Mikey, famed
kid from Life cereal commercials, died after eating Pop Rocks and drinking
a Coke.
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“Members Only” jackets… so no more.
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And lastly, I’ll make a song stick in
your head for the rest of the day: you actually remember the words to the
theme song of “The Greatest American Hero,” (BELIEVE IT OR NOT, I’M
WALKIN’ ON AIR.. I NEVER THOUGHT I COULD FEEL SO FREE-EE-EE…”)