Revelations

Cordelia:  "Xander, why are you giving me a lap dance?"
Xander:  "What?  I just like you."

Willow:  "I think it's great when two people like two people and want to be close to them instead of anyone else."
Xander:  "Hear, hear!"
Oz:  "Yeah, well-put."

Cordelia:  "Why are you guys so hyper?"
Willow:  "Hey, speaking of people and things they do that aren't like usual... Anyone notice Buffy acting sort of different?"
Xander:  "Let's see:  killing zombies... torching sewer monsters... and, no, that's pretty much the same old Buffster."

Willow:  "A boyfriend?  Why wouldn't she tell us?"
Cordelia:  "Excuse me?  When your last steady killed half the class, and then your rebound guy sends you a dump-o-gram?  It makes a girl shy."
Xander:  "But we're the best of Buffy's bestest buds.  She'd tell us."
Buffy:  "Tell you what?"
Willow:  "About your new boyfriend, who we made up... unless we didn't?"
Buffy:  "This was a topic of discussion?"
Oz:  "Well, raised, but never discussed."

Buffy:  "Synchronized slaying."
Faith:  "New Olympic category?"

Buffy:  "What do you think?"
Gwendolyn:  "Sloppy.  You telegraph punches, leave blind sides open, and for a school night slaying, take entirely too much time."

Faith:  "No offense, lady, I just have this problem with authority figures.  They end up kind of dead."

Gwendolyn:  "Do you have Hume's Paranormal Encyclopedia?  The labyrinth maps of Malta?"
Giles:  "It's on order."

Faith:  "Excuse me, Mary Poppins, but you don't seem to be listening."

Buffy:  "Hmm, academic probation's not so funny today, huh, Giles?"

Gwendolyn:  "The fact is, there is talk in the Council that you have become a bit too... American."
Giles:  "Me?"
Buffy:  "Him?"

Giles:  "What do you propose?"
Gwendolyn:  "Well, if it's not too radical a suggestion, I thought we might kill him."

Giles:  "That was bracing."
Buffy:  "Interesting lady.  Can we kill her?"
Giles:  "I think the Council might frown upon that."

Buffy:  "Big night for us Slayer types.  People to see, demons to kill."

Buffy:  "It's just... old habit.  Bad, bad habit.. to be broken."

Buffy:  "Cold turkey.  That's the key to quitting."
Angel:  "..."
Buffy:  "You think they make a patch for this?"

Buffy:  "I'm going to try and vent a little hormonal angst by going out there and killing a Lagos, whatever that is."
Angel:  "Lagos?"
Buffy:  "Some demon looking for some all-powerful thingamabob, and I gotta' stop him before he unleashes unholy havoc, and it's another Tuesday night in Sunnydale."

Xander:  "Hey, you're not the Watcher of me."

Willow:  "What does he want from us, anyway?"
Xander:  "The number of a qualified surgeon to remove the British flag from his butt?"

Willow:  "Oh, stop."
Xander:  "Right.  Stop means no, and no means no, so, um... stop."

Willow:  "How'd you find it?"
Giles:  "I looked."

Faith:  "Ronnie, deadbeat.  Steve, klepto.  Kenny... drummer.  Eventually, I just had to face up to my destiny as a loser magnet.  Now it's strictly get some, get gone.  You can't trust guys."
Buffy:  "You can trust some guys.  Really, I've read about them."

Faith:  "I've had my share of losers, but you...  You boinked the undead."

Xander:  "Hey, Giles, here's a nifty idea.  Why don't I alleviate my guilt by going out and getting myself really, really killed?"

Buffy:  "What am I doing?  What are you doing?"
Angel:  "I don't know."
Buffy:  "Shame on you!"

Angel:  "I think I have what you're looking for."
Buffy:  "Great, just, wherever this was gift-wrapped, remind me not to shop there."

Angel:  "The Glove of Myhnegon."
Buffy:  "The world's ugliest fashion accessory."

Gwendolyn:  "The pictures are fun to look at, Mr. Giles, but one really ought to read the nice words as well."

Giles:  "I am in complete control of my Slayer."
<Xander bursts in>
Xander:  "Giles!  We have a big problem.  It's Buffy."

Buffy:  "What's with all the tragedy masks?"

Buffy:  "It's not what you think."
Xander:  "Hope not, because I think you're harboring a vicious killer."

Willow:  "This isn't about attacking Buffy.  Remember, 'I' statements only:  'I feel angry.'  'I feel worried.'"
Cordelia:  "Fine.  Here's one:  I feel worried... about me!"

Buffy:  "What is this?  Demons Anonymous?  I don't need an intervention here."

Buffy:  "I just wanted to wait..."
Xander:  "For what?  For Angel to go psycho again the next time you give him a happy?"

Cordelia:  "What gives you the right to suck face with your demon lover again?"
Buffy:  "It was an accident!"
Xander:  "What, you just tripped and fell on his lips?"

Buffy:  "Look, you guys, he's the one that found the Glove of Myhnegon.  He's keeping it safe for us in the mansion."
Xander:  "Right!  Great plan.  Leave tons of firepower with a scary guy, and leave us to clean up the mess."

Buffy:  "You would just love an excuse to hurt him, wouldn't you?"
Xander:  "I don't need an excuse.  I think lots of dead people actually constitutes a reason."

Cordelia:  "Hello?  Miss Not-Over-Yourself-Yet?"

Gwendolyn:  "A word of advice?  Vampires rarely knock."

Gwendolyn:  "Do you know who the Spartans were?"
Faith:  "Wild stab -- a bunch of guys from Spart?"

Gwendolyn:  "You will probably hate me a great deal of the time."
Faith:  "You think?"

Buffy:  "So, on a scale of one to a million, how much are you hating me right now?"

Faith:  "I say I deal with this problem right now.  I say I slay."
Xander:  "Can I come?"

Willow:  "Um, not to downplay my own slaying abilities, which in some circles are considered formidable, but shouldn't Faith be here?"

Buffy:  "Look, if you're feeling any demon-o-phobia, please... splitting is totally an option."

Buffy:  "How long do you think he can stay angry with me, anyway?"
Willow:  "The Emotional Marathon Man?"

Willow:  "Keeping secrets is a lot of work... one could hypothetically imagine."
Buffy:  "You have no idea."
Willow:  "None whatsoever!"

Willow:  "You know, I always consider myself a good person -- floss, do my homework, never cheat.  But lately, and please don't judge me on this, but I want you to be the first to know, that, that... there's a demon behind you."

Buffy:  "Sorry about that.  So, what were you saying?"
Willow:  "Oh, I... I opened my S.A.T. test booklet five minutes early.  Just doesn't seem important now, does it?"
Buffy:  "Your secret's safe with me."

Xander:  "Good old Sunnydale library.  Fully equipped with reference books, file cards... and weapons."
Faith:  "Beauty."
Xander:  "I call crossbow."

Xander:  "Just think a minute."
Faith:  "Yeah, I'm thinking.  Thinking Buffy's ex-meat did this!"

Xander:  "Faith, if we leave, Giles could die."
Faith:  "Yeah, and he's going to have a whole lot of company unless I do something permanent."

Xander:  "Wait!"
Faith:  "For what?  You to grow a pair?"

Gwendolyn:  "That's what I love about this town.  Everyone's so helpful."

Angel:  "Okay, that hurt."

Faith:  "I can't believe how much I'm gonna' kill you."

Xander:  "Think we got it?"
Willow:  "Well, it's either the catalyst for living flame, or just some really smelly sand."

Xander:  "I know what the glove does."
Willow:  "There's no time to test this."

Faith:  "You're confused, Twinkie.  Let me clear you up.  Vampire.  Slayer.  Dead vampire."

Gwendolyn:  "Faith, a word of advice.  You're an idiot."

Cordelia:  "So, there's no more glove-thingy?"
Xander:  "No, a little living flame, a little mesquite -- gone for good."
Oz:  "Sounds like we missed a lot of fun."
Xander:  "Then we're telling it wrong."

Willow:  "What do you think Buffy and Angel are gonna' do?"
Xander:  "Boy, do I don't know."

Willow:  "Well, he saved me from a horrible flamey death.  That sort of makes me like him again."
Xander:  "Well, as long as she and Angel don't get pelvic, we'll be okay, I guess."

Buffy:  "What are you guys talking about?"
Oz:  "Oddly enough, your boyfriend.  Again."

Xander:  "Just seeing the two of you kissing after everything that happened, I leaned toward the postal.  But I trust you."
Cordelia:  "I don't, just for the record."

Giles:  "She was kicked out by the Council a couple of years ago for misuses of dark power.  They swear there was a memo."

Buffy:  "The place looks nice."
Faith:  "Yeah, it's real Spartan."

Buffy:  "How are you?"
Faith:  "Five-by-five."
Buffy:  "I'll interpret that as good."

Buffy:  "I realize this is gonna' sound funny coming from someone that just spent a lot of time kicking your face... but you can trust me."

Buffy:  "I'm on your side."
Faith:  "I'm on my side, and that's enough."
Buffy:  "Not always."