Willow: "This is a nightmare. This is... my world is spinning."
Xander: "It's not that bad, Willow, really."
Willow: "740? Verbal?? I'm pathetic! Illiterate! I'm Cletus, the slack-jawed yokel."
Xander: "That's right, and the fact that your 740 verbal closely resembles my combined scores in no way compromises your position as the village idiot."
Willow: "Where did I go wrong?"
Xander: "Willow is very sad by her academic failure. How did you do? This is not good."
Cordelia: "What's not good?"
Xander: "Well, I'm just worried it may hurt my standing as campus stud when people find out I'm dating a brain."
Cordelia: "Please! I have some experience in covering these things up."
Oz: "I can see why you'd be upset. That was my sarcastic voice."
Xander: "You know, it sounds a lot like your regular voice."
Oz: "I've been told that."
Xander: "Why the sourpuss?"
Buffy: "I don't know. I guess... my future. I never really thought about it. I wasn't even sure I was going to have one."
Cordelia: "I think this is great. Now you can leave, and never come back! Well, I mean that in a positive way. Get out of Sunnydale. That's a good thing. What kind of moron would ever want to come back here?"
Xander: "Come on. It'll be fun."
Cordelia: "I don't know, I just thought we were going to do something... you know, classy."
Xander: "What's classier than bowling?"
Cordelia: "Apart from everything ever?"
Xander: "There's pictures. Of me. In your locker. I never knew I was locker door material."
Cordelia: "Well... just barely. Besides, I look really cute in those pictures."
Willow: "What's this?"
Oz: "It's a gift."
Willow: "What's the occasion?"
Oz: "Pretty much you are."
Willow: "It's a little Pez witch!
Oz: "It's kind of a theme present. Do you like it?
Willow: "I like. I more than like. Oz, this is probably the sweetest... We have to find a little Pez werewolf, so little Pez witch can have a boyfriend."
Oz: "I don't think they make a werewolf Pez. You might have to settle for a wacky cartoon dog."
Buffy: "Okay, but you're just going for a few days, right? I mean, you're not going to settle there and grow crops or anything?"
Giles: "What? Oh, my gear. No, this is... this is basic necessities."
Buffy: "Giles, you pack like me."
Willow: "It's a mistake. It's a terrible, fatal mistake. I see that now."
Xander: "It's just bowling."
Willow: "It's bad bowling."
Willow: "It's a very intimate situation. It's all sexy, with the smoke and the sweating, and the shoe rental..."
Xander: "You're turned on by rented shoes?"
Willow: "That's not the issue."
Buffy: "All day it's been, like, 'Congratulations! Go away.'"
Spike: "I need a curse."
Pagan: A what?"
Spike: "A curse! Something nasty. Boils. I want to give him boils all over his face. You know, dripping pustules. Let's really go for the gusto here."
Pagan: I'm hearing a lot of negative energy, and I bet..."
Spike: "Leprosy! A spell that makes his parts fall off. That sounds proper."
Pagan: We don't carry leprosy."
Spike: "I gave her everything - beautiful jewels, beautiful dresses, with beautiful girls in them, but nothing made her happy. And she would flirt! I caught her on a park bench, making out with a chaos demon! Have you ever seen a chaos demon? They're all slime and antlers. They're disgusting. She only did it to hurt me. So I said, 'I'm not putting up with this any more.' And she said, 'Fine!' And I said, 'Yeah, I've got an unlife, you know!' And then she said... she said we could still be friends. God, I'm so unhappy!"
Willow: "There, there."
Willow: "Now, I'm not a real witch, you know. I don't know if this is going to work right away."
Spike: "Well, if at first you don't succeed, I'll kill him, and you try again."
