Alright. This kind of thing really fucking razzes me! Our children are going to school to be taught by people who can barely fucking put two words together. The picture below is that of an actual paper sent home with my little brother concerning a bake sale to take place at his school. The literacy level of the typist befuddles me, because she is the "Bake Sale Chairwoman," a title that she has no doubt worked hard her whole life to achieve. That must be right up there with Vice President of Pretzel Day. Jesus. It's no wonder our kids are so fucked up. By my estimation, they're being educated by people who dropped out of high school and got their G.E.D.'s in prison while doing 18 months for child neglect.
My first problem with this artwork is the first sentence. "The Home and School Association will be holding a Bake Sale for the children."
Well, I kinda figured that out, since the letterhead states "RHAWNHURST SCHOOL BAKE SALE." And no, they will not be holding it for the children, they will be holding it to garner more money for the Teacher's Lounge Liquor Cabinet Fund. Also, they capitalize "bake sale" like it's a fucking holiday.
The next problem is the phrase "bake goods." They need us to send in "bake goods." What does that mean? Should I send in a cookie sheet and a set of pot holders? Ohh, ohhh they want baked goods! I think the person writing this was a little "baked."
But, lo and behold, all of the above was topped off with a final paragraph that sounds like it was written by crackheads who just wants the "bake goods" for themselves, because they actually tell us exactly what the "children" like. During this list, they stick an "and" right in the middle, like they were finished the list, but then continued anyway. Then they complete the sentence with the most mind-numbingly illiterate phrase ever compiled by an educator. "...just to give you an idea on what to send in."
An idea "on" what to send in? What the fuck is wrong with you? On top of that, they make the term "baggie" a fucking verb. "Please baggie the treats?" Did what you're smoking come in a baggie, too?
You wonder why I'm fucking crazy? It's because I was taught by these fucking people!