1)I know, I'm obsessing.
2)But this class is hard.
3)And frankly, I never want to be in it again.
4)It turns out I'm just not a big fan of cutting animals up.
5)Good thing I didn't want to be pre-vet.
6)So anyway, I failed the first exam in spectacular fashion.
7)Tomorrow's the second exam.
8)I'm stressing just the smallest bit.
9)So I came back from lunch and I was sitting outside, trying to relax.
10)Martin wanders by.
11)I love Martin. He's as crazy as me.
12)He was having a horrible day, which is unusual for him.
13)So we took a mutual study break.
14)It involved being loud and obnoxious in the quad, which is an activity we usually associate with drunk people.
15)I hope some of them were trying to study while we were being annoying.
16)It also involved discussing the relative "buttness" of certain trees.
17)We managed to drag four other people into the conversation, though we had to explain to them the definitions of "butt" and "non-butt".
"butt"--lost all its leaves
"less butt"--has all colored leaves
"only slightly butt"--some colored leaves, some green
"butt in a repulsive way"--losing green leaves in a way that makes it look dead
"butt in a sad way"--has all green leaves, but drooping in a way that makes it look dead
"butt in a cold way"--the rock Martin was sitting on was cold
"butt philosophy class"--a philosophy class that does not use the term "butt"
"excessively butt"--Martin's roommate last semester
"butt what"--Emily's non-comprehension when we tried to explain that the trees were "butt"
"non-butt"--study breaks that involve discussion of the word "butt"
"dis-non-beneficial butt"--anything that makes such study breaks possible
"freaky butt"--Martin's fear of spiders
"oh, butt"--Martin was disappointed when we failed to crush the spider with a granite slab