*You should be sleeping.*

The darkness made strange patterns on the floor, dispersing and reforming as his tired eyes refused to focus. It seemed like far less work to simply watch than to try and do anything about it, so he just sat and stared.

The hulking entity behind him tried again. *You really ought to be in bed.*

Bed... Bed was a nice place, he thought distractedly. Or it had been, once. Now it was just another place he had to go alone. No, he wasn't overly fond of his bed anymore.

*You're not thinking clearly,* the voice said, and this time it sounded a little stern. *If you do not rest, your fighting will suffer.*

And it was all about fighting, after all. They couldn't do anything without fighting these days. There never seemed to be an alternative. "I don't feel like fighting," he mumbled abruptly, watching the shadows slide into each other across the floor. "Why doesn't someone just surrender and get it over with?"

*Someone other than you?* the voice replied, a wry note tingeing the words.

The darkness dissolved once more, and he blinked rapidly. His eyes had started to tear in response to the dryness. "She said she gave me up, Zaal."

There was a noticeable pause. *Tonight?* the zord inquired at last.

"Yes," he said, frowning at the floor. "No. She said it tonight. But she said she'd done it a long time ago. When she first became a Ranger."

*What does that mean, she 'gave you up'?* Zaal wanted to know.

He let out a frustrated sigh. "I don't know. I wish I did. Maybe if I knew, I'd know how to get her back." Only to Zaal did he admit that getting her back was all he really wanted. Saving face in front of the team, making her see reason, guiding a new teammate in the responsibility of the Power... they were all excuses, ways to justify the things he said to her without having to face the devastating truth.

The truth was that he was utterly and irrevocably in love with someone who had "given him up" long ago.

*She hasn't been yours to win for a long time,* Zaal said quietly. The words were a disturbing echo of his own thoughts, and he wondered distantly just how much the Power was projecting to his companion.

"I know," he muttered anyway. Whatever the zord was getting mentally, there was no one here to hear him if he spoke aloud. "I'm trying not to think about that."

*Don't you want to know why?* Zaal asked, a moment later. There was an odd lightness to her words, as though she thought he ought to be smiling with her.

"I know why," he grumbled.

*Truly?* Apparently diverted, Zaal added, *Do share.*

"Because I'm stubborn, arrogant, and contrary. And because I always think I'm right, even though I never am. And I'm conceited. Maybe that falls under the same category as 'arrogant', though; I'm not sure."

*No,* Zaal said, dismissing Cetaci's words as easily as he had rattled them off. *That's not it at all.*

He waited, but no further explanation was forthcoming. "Well?" he asked reluctantly. "Are you going to tell me?"

*I haven't decided.* She was clearly trying to cheer him up with the teasing, but it wasn't working. It just wasn't a good night to be teased.

He tried to disguise his sullenness, knowing she didn't deserve it. But he wasn't going to play her game, either. He stared down at the floor, watching the shadows start slipping out of focus again, and he wondered what would happen if he fell asleep right here. If he just didn't go back to his room, and exhaustion overtook him before morning did.

*She isn't yours to win,* Zaal said quietly, taking pity on him at last, *because she never stopped being yours to lose. You can't regain something you already have.*

"Something I already have," he repeated aloud, trying to make sense of that. His overworked brain wasn't cooperating.

*If she had really given you up,* the other continued, *she wouldn't fight every suggestion you make. The two of you wouldn't turn every risk you take into a battle for dominance. And she certainly wouldn't come to you when you dream about her.*

His head snapped up, and he tried desperately to swallow a yawn. "How do you know about that?" he blurted out.

Zaal gave the very distinct impression of a shrug. *She told Mireth.*

Girls, he thought disgustedly. They would talk.

*I don't appreciate that,* Zaal informed him. *As though your gender is any more discrete.*

"*I* didn't tell anyone!"

*You can't even keep your eyes open,* she said, with some asperity. *I refuse to argue with you in this condition.*

"Because I'm right," he muttered. He couldn't muster the appropriate indignation, though, and she seemed to know it. It annoyed him to realize that his eyes *were* closed, but he suspected that the difficulty involved in opening them outweighed any potential advantages.

*Delphinius,* she said, more gently. *You really should be sleeping.*

"If you'd stop talking to me," he mumbled, "I probably would be."

*You are not going to sleep here,* she said, and there was no room for argument in her tone. *If you do not return to your quarters, I will contact control and have them teleport you there.*

"No." He managed to rouse himself at that, for he didn't doubt that she would carry out her threat. And he knew who was in control right now. "I'm going. Truth."

He dragged himself to his feet, embarrassed to stumble a little when his balance didn't quite cooperate. He put one hand on Zaal's hull, though whether for support or comfort he wasn't entirely sure. "Good night," he added, as he turned to go.

*Delphinius...*

He paused, glancing back.

*Yours to lose,* she reminded him quietly.

He just sighed. It wasn't half as comforting as she probably meant it to sound. Their relationship wasn't at all what he wanted it to be, and here was Zaal telling him that it could only get worse.

"Yeah," he said, turning away again. "That's the truth."