Why Canada Blows

Canada => The place where all Americans know NOTHING about. Sure, some actors come from Canada, put that's about it. Ever notice that America had to fight for their independence in a long war, while Canada was just given away? England was correct when releasing it from the empire. What was it, Quebec or something tried to leave, but got held back. I don't blame them for trying. Yes, it was me who wrote the article in the guestbook. But what should we do with the rest of them. I have made a list for suggestions:

a. Have them listen to Spicegirls and Hanson for the rest of their lives.
b. We'll have a contest to see who can hold their head under water the longest.
c. Accuse them of world hunger, war, and disease.
d. Put all the rabid dogs in the world in Canada, and close off all borders.
e. We'll test nuclear weapons in Canada.
f. Scratch e., we'll use chemical and bio weapons on them. Nukes would melt the ice and cause worldwide flooding.
g. Dig a trench along the border. Without the United States, Canada would float away into the north pole.