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My quotes

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here's some quotes:

~i can't think about other people right now. i'm too self absorbed~

~this day was a total waste of make-up~

~My foot and your ass need to meet!~

if your happy and you know it .............get out of my house

~buckle up huntsville- Jessica's driving~

my computer must like me cuz everytime i sit down i turn it on

~Isn't it ironic how you adore those who ignore you, but you ignore those who adore you!~

~Before you criticize someone, you should walk a mile in their shoes. That way, when you criticize them, you're a mile away and you have their shoes.~

~i'm not short, i'm vertically challenged!~

~Ya know, if guys had a period they'd probably brag about the size of their tampons~

~B is for beautiful, I is for intelligent, T is for talented, C is for charming, and H is for how HARD i'm gonna hit u for calling me a BITCH!!!!~

~If u need space join NASA baby!!!~

~If the shoe fits, get another one just like it.~

~DONT LOOK AT ME IN THAT TONE OF VOICE~

~Going to church does not make you a Christian anymore than going to McDonalds makes you a hamburger.~

~friends are forever, guys are for whenever. so when worst comes to worst my girls come first~

There are two theories to arguing with women. Neither one works

~ The chances of a piece of bread falling butter side down is directly proportional to the cost of the carpet.

~Ociffer, I swear to drunk i'm not God~

~Your house is so nasty, I tripped over a rat, and a cockroach stole my wallet.~

"I'm taking what he's saying with a spoon full of sugar" another Jessica blond moment.

~You took the "L" outta LOVER and now its "over"~

~Three people can't share a love seat~

~girls are like telephones in a way, they like to be held and talked to, but you press the wrong button and you get disconnected.~

"i'm here first- i'm going!!!!" -Jessica on four way stops

~im not a tease im just a reminder of what u can't have~

~Never make a decision you can get someone else to make.~

~I DONT NEED TO POINT OUT MY BEST QUALITIES...THEY STICK OUT ON THEIR OWN!~

~Duct tape is like the force. It has a light side & a dark side, and it holds the universe together~

"stop honking the horn, quit calling my name, cuz i already know im driving you insane."

~i'm good at sucking down things~ -an original, lol.

~if it didnt really matter u wouldnt be spendin so much time thinkin about it~

~Many people will walk in and out of your life, but only true friends will leave footprints in your heart~

~if the only tool you have is a hammer you tend to see every problem as a nail~

~Never look down on anybody unless you are helping them up.~

~i dont have a license to kill-i have a learners permit....~
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