Timothy Jones in the Ring
"Welcome to UWM Saturday Night! Timothy Jones has a big announcement for us,"said Steven. Ken said,"I wonder what it is." "No Chance" hit and Timothy Jones came out with two belts on his shoulders. Steven said,"What the heck? Timothy Jones is a title holder?" Mr. Jones got into the ring and said,"Tonight, there will be a tournament. It'll be a tournament with no rules. It'll be a tournament with 4 men in the ring. It'll be a HARDCORE TAG TEAM CHAMPIONSHIP TOURNAMENT!" Ken yelled,"OHHHHHH DADDY! That's what those belts are!" Mr. Jones continued,"Don't be surprised becaused Joe Hart and Crispy are going to win these belts I have on my shoulders. Anyone else has no chance."
Hardcore Howie/Dashi Nokia vs. Joe Hart/Crispy
"Due to the graphic nature of this wrestler viewer discretion is advised", and Howie came out to loud boos. "Geeze, does this guy get new music every week,"said Ken. Howie climbed into the ring and taunted the crowd. Dashi Nokia came out and slid into the ring. Howie and Dashi got in each others faces and Howie shoved DaShi and DaShi shoved back. Howie looked as if he was backing off and then dropped DaShi with a hard right hand. "These guys are supposed to be partners,"said Steven. "Yeah I know, the crowd will be silent as they hate both teams,"said Ken. DaShi got up and started to brawl with Howie. Crispy and Joe came running out of the back with chairs and slid into the ring. DaShi saw them coming and tried to stop Joe but Joe quickly swung the chair and DaShi fell down. Crispy ran at Howie but Howie moved and the chair bounced off the ropes and hit Crispy in the face. "Hahaha, Crispy you moron,"said Ken. Howie grabbed the chair and beat Crispy with the chair. Joe ran at Howie and hit a chair shot to the gt, and then to Howies back. "OOOOOHHHHH DDDAAADDDDDDYYYY". Joe continued to hit Howie and DaShi ran from behind and hit Joe with a forearm. Crispy rolled out of the ring and grabbed a table and started to set it up when DaShi grabbed Howie and threw him over the top rope onto Crispy through the table. Crowd cheers. "HAHAHAHA, that was the best move I have ever seen!!"said Ken. DaShi turned around and Joe grabbed him and spinebustered him onto a chair. Joe covers 1,2, DaShi kicks out. Crispy and Howie were starting to get up and Howie started punching Crispy, but Crispy blocked and low blowed Howie, followed by a suplex. Crispy rolled into the ring and helped Joe stomp on DaShi. Howie rolled into the ring and went to dropkick Crispy but Crispy pulled DaShi in the way. Howie just looked at DaShi and DaShi kick flipped up. "Uh oh,"said Steven. Howie and Dashi started shoving again, but Howie went for a right hand DaShi blocked and applied the arm buster. "These two are partners you know,"said Ken. Howie was almost unconsious when ShiKariudo came out of the crowd and pulled DaShi out. ShiKariudo grabbed DaShi and threw him over the guard railing into the crowd. Joe applied the Dullshooter and Howie still suffering from the arm buster passed out from the pain. The ref rang the bell. "Joe Hart and Crispy advance,"said Steven. "Yeah, against a very stupid team,"said Ken, "Jones must have known that Howie and DaShi would fight, thats why he put Hart and Crispy against them."
Sign of the Week
"ShiKariudo, GO BACK TO JAPAN!"
Slut TV Part 1
The Big TV powered up and showed Womankind in a parking lot. "YESSSS IT'S SLUT TV!"Ken yelled. Womankind turned towards the camera and said, "Hello again wrestling fans, and welcome to another episode of Slut TV. This week, since no other wrestler dares face me for MY UWM Women's belt, I decided to go out on the town to see what these other wrestlers REALLY do in their off-time. I followed Della here, to the UWM female wrestling school. This is where all the females in UWM start. Steven said, "What? Can it be true that Della has actually been TRAINING all this time!?" Womankind pointed the camera away from her and showed a strip joint called Pussy Palace. Ken laughed and said,"It's true too! TAKE THE CAMERA IN THERE WOMANKIND!!!" Womankind said, "Now, what would Della be doing in here? Let's go take a look." Ken jumped up out of his chair and screamed, "WOOOOOO! OH DADDY HERE WE GO!" Womankind guided the camera in Hooters. Womankind spotted Della at a desk. Della said, "Hi. I'd like to apply for a job here." The man interviewing her said, "Well, it looks like you have the...qualifications, but I'm afraid you'll have to be...tested first." Della said, "I understand." Della and the man went into a back room and the man locked the door. Womankind spun around to face the camera and said, "Whoa! Now, I know that Della hasn't been earning much from wrestling seeing as she never does it, but this is LOW! Well, I don't think I need to prove anything else here." Womankind went back outside and drove off. Ken said, "Aww I wanted to see some dancing girls..." Steven said,"Don't worry Ken...Womankind said she's going to follow all the women around. There's still Rini and DDT to go. You never know what you'll see." Ken said,"That's true. Remember what DDT was doing to that pole last week?" Steven said,"Womankind just made that up! Why do you think she turned the camera away!?" Ken said,"Because she didn't think it was appropriate for the "younger viewers" to see!" Steven said,"Whatever you say Ken...Let's get back to the action in the ring."
Lance Fortune/???? vs. Matt Sledge/Jerkicho
The Big TV showed Lance Fortune with Mr. Lucky in the back. Lance said,"Remember what I taught you. You need a gimmick just like I have mine. Let's go." Ken said,"The Golden Child Lance Fortune is in the tournament? I wonder who his partner is." Steven said,"I'd bet my money on Kevin Hash AKA The Sellout." Lance's music hit and he came out alone throwing money into the crowd. Ken said,"Where's Mr. Lucky? Is his gimmick to come from the rafters like Misery?" An unknown music hit and Mr. Lucky came out wearing red, white, and blue wrestling tights. Steven said,"I don't believe this! Mr. Lucky is going to wrestle!?" Ken said,"Weird...PAY UP LITTLE MAN!" Steven said,"Oh, shut up. It was a figure of speech." Lance and Lucky got into the ring and Lucky got the mic. He said,"I wrestled in high school, college, and now, I'm gonna wrestle in UWM! I'm one of the greatest wrestlers here and do you know why? I owe it all to the 3 M's, Mind, Muscles, and MONEY!" Mr. Lucky threw a ton of money into the crowd and then, Matt Sledge's music hit. He came out to boo's. Ken said,"Matt Sledge and the word hardcore don't belong together." Jerkicho came out next and got a big pop. He had a mic with him and he said,"Jerkicho is here and he wants to tell Mr. Lucky to learn the 3 F's, Fat, Flabby, and old Fart. No one is E-E-E-Ever going to beat the Ayatollah of Coke Cola!" Matt and Jerkicho got into the ring and the bell rang. Lance Fortune stomped on Matt as Jerkicho pounded away on Mr. Lucky. Lance turned to Jerkicho and clotheslined him on the back of his head. Matt got up and lowblowed Lance. Matt gave him a huge german suplex and rolled out of the ring. Mr. Lucky was working on Jerkicho's eyes as Matt slid back in with a chair. Matt ran at Lance but Lance tripped him and Matt hit his head on the chair when he hit the floor. The Golden Child stomped on Jerkicho and Mr. Lucky started choking Matt. Matt picked Lucky over his head and threw him at Lance. Ken said,"WOW! Matt picked that big fatass up over his head. I'm impressed...NOT!" Jerkicho rolled out of the ring and pulled a table out from under the ring. Matt delivered bodyslams to Mr. Lucky and Lance over and over as they got up. Jerkicho got another table out and stacked them up on the outside. When Matt went for another bodyslam, Lance dropkicked him in the back of his knee and Lucky fall on top of Matt for the pin. The ref counted 1..2. and Matt kicked out. Steven said,"Mr. Lucky almost got the pin!" Mr. Lucky held Matt Sledge while Lance Fortune punched away at him. Jerkicho got into the ring and bulldog'ed Lance. Matt gave Mr. Lucky a backkick to the nuts and he went down. Matt rolled Mr. Lucky on the stacked tables and helped Jerkicho beat on Lance. They layed Lance on the table and Jerkicho climbed the toprope. Lance got up and pushed Jerkicho off the turnbuckle. Jerkicho hit his head on the railing and was down. Lance dropkicked Matt and Mr. Lucky got off the table. They took Matt Sledge up to the toprope and gave him a huge double powerbomb through the two stacked tables. Ken screamed,"OHHHHHHH DADDY!" Mr. Lucky pinned with his foot and the ref counted 1..2..3. Lance Fortune and Mr. Lucky advance in the tournament. Steven said,"Wait! Look at that! Mr. Lucky slipped Matt some money and now, Lance is giving Jerkicho some money! THEY BOUGHT ANOTHER WIN!" Ken said,"More and more sellouts in UWM. Hey Lance, I'll be your friend for a fifty."
Slut TV Part 2
Womankind appeared on the Big TV again. Ken jumped up again and yelled, "YAY! Here we go again! It's time for another episode of SLUT TV!!!" Womankind said, "Well, what a treat it must be for you male pigs out there this week. You get to see all three UWM sluts this week, in some of their sluttiest acts ever. I followed Rini over to this mall, and she just went in the drug store. Let's go in and take a look, shall we?" Womankind guided the camera over towards the prescription counter, where Rini was standing. Rini said to one of the workers there,"Hello. I'm here to pick up my birth control pills." The woman serving Rini said,"Of course, Mrs. Carman." The woman went back and got them, then handed them to Rini. Rini exited the drug store. Womankind turned to the camera and said,"Well, that was interesting. What would she need those for? Oh...Of course...For fucking every male wrestler in UWM...Is there anything left to prove here? I don't think so. Now, onto DDT." Ken said,"Well, that wasn't as...exciting as the last version with Della, but it was just as effective." Womankind got into the car, sighed, and said,"I wish they'd make it a little harder for me...Then again, they're always trying to make things hard. And, I know, by looking at them, it must be very tough for them to do that."
Studly Boys vs. Rogues
"This should be a great match" said Ken. Rogues came out to lots of cheers. Studleys came out with a cart full of tables. "Oh, this should be a GREAT match now,"said Ken. Rogues wasted no time and suicide dived through ropes onto the Studleys. Jesse grabbed Pa Pa Ray and slammed him into the steel rail while Lukas slammed D-Buffs head over and over into the steel steps. Lukas held D-Buffs legs open and Jesse ran over and kicked D-Buff between the pipes. "OOOOHHHHHH DDDAAAAAAADDDDDYYY" D-Buff fell to the ground motionless. Jesse grabbed Pa Pa Ray and body slammed him onto the floor. Jesse hoped onto the guard rail and did a mini moonsault onto Pa Pa Ray for a two count. "Why don't they pin D-Buff?"asked ken,"He is obviously dead." Lukas set up a table and Jesse threw Pa Pa Ray to Lukas where Lukas kicked him in the stomach and hit the firemans pancake threw the table. "OH MY GOD!! Its over!!"scream Steven. Lukas covered and Pa Pa kicked out at 2. D-Buff slowly started to get up and recovered just in time and avoided a drop kick by Jesse. Jesse started to get up and D-Buff grabbed him and ddt'ed him down. Lukas was still pounding on Pa Pa Ray when D-Buff came running over and hit Lukas in the back with a piece of table. Lukas slowly got up and D-Buff did a back-breaker. Pa Pa ray set up a table and D-Buff threw Lukas into Pa Pa Ray's arms into a set up for 3s. D-Buff jumped onto the ring apron and jumped off into a 3s threw the table. "OOOOOHHHHHHHHH DDADDDYYYYYY." D-Buff covered and jesse tried to stop the count but was held back by Pa Pa Ray and the ref counted to 3. "WOW, what a brutal match,"said Steven. "Yeah, it never went in the ring,"said Ken.
Kid Kaos/Hardcore Robert vs. ReyMooseJr/Big Moose
Moose Pack's music was heard as ReyMooseJr and Big Moose walked out Rini and the crowd went nuts. Ken said,"Rey's been TV champ, so has Big Moose but neither have had a sniff of the hardcore belt. I don't think they have much of a chance." Steven said,"I don't know Ken, with Rini in their corner anything can happen." Then "Detroit Love" hit and Kid Kaos walked out with Hardcore Robert. Ken said,"Kaos looks fully healed, but two or three weeks is too little for a full healing." Steven said,"I'm sure we all remember the great match from last week, Robert against Howie..maybe Howie will interfere in this one." Kaos and Robert slid in and the bell rang. "Here we go,"said Steven as ReyMooseJr and Kid Kaos tied up. Suddenly, Womankind came running out with a vengeance from the back. "What the hell is she doing here?"said Steven as she turned a corner and ran straight at Rini. Rini turned around and began to run away. Meanwhile, Rey got out of the tieup and noticed Rini running from Womankind. He immediatly jumped over the ring ropes and ran after Womankind. Ken said,"Odd turn of events, looks like it's Kid Kaos and Robert against The Big Moose. He's big enough, he has a chance!" Kaos and Robert ran at Big Moose, but he showed strength and tossed them both over the top rope. Steven yelled,"WHAT A MOVE BY THE BIG MOOSE!!" as Kaos got right up and walked over to Steven. Ken said,"Get up Steven before Kaos kicks your ass!!" Steven replied,"You don't gotta tell me twice!" as Steven got up and Kaos grabbed the chair Steven was sitting on and went move to the Big Moose, who was sliding outside. Ken yelled,"Here we go!!" as Robert got up and the two double clotheslined Big Moose with the chair. "Good God!!"yelled Steven as Kid Kaos and Hardcore Robert picked up the ring steps and ran them at Big Mooses back. "I knew Robert and Kaos had a big advantage in this one!!"said Ken as Big Moose struggled to his feet. Robert picked up a ring bell and climbed up to the apron and signalled to drop it on Big Moose's head. Steven said, "Big Moose...man I thought he had a good chance in this one..guess not!" Kaos watched on gleefully as Robert jumped off the apron, but Big Moose threw his hand up to Robert throat and yelled. Ken yelled,"MOOSE SLAM!!" Kaos ran at Big Moose but he shot his hand out to Kid and grabbed him by the throat. Steven yelled,"DOUBLE MOOSE SLAM ON THE FLOOR!!" Big Moose picked them up and hung them in the air for quite some time before dropping them violently on the ground. "OHHHHHHHH DADDDY!!!"yelled Ken as Big Moose put his large body across both Kaos and Robert and pinned. 1...2..both men's shoulders got up!! "What resiliancy from Kaos and Hardcore Robert!!" Big Moose looked up, dumbfounded and threw Kaos and Robert into the ring and hunted under the ring for a good weapon to use against the two competitors. He finally found a table after searching for a while and tossed it in. Steven said,"I can only imagine what Big Moose can do with that!!" Hardcore Robert and Kid Kaos struggled to their feet, and in desperation, double dropkicked Big Moose to the outside and set up the table. Big Moose got up quickly and slid in, but was met with a swinging neckbreaker from Robert. "DRIVE BY!!"yelled Ken as Robert rolled Big Moose on the table and Kaos climbed to the toprope. He signalled for the legdrop we all knew and jumped off onto Big Moose, cracking him through the table. Steven yelled,"MOSH DIVE!!" and Ken replied,"Steven you're crazy man..it's the 187 Dive!!!" Steven said,"Either one is okay, here comes Rey and Rini!" as Hardcore Robert pinned Big Moose. 1...Rey slid in...2...Kaos stopped him with a huge clothesline...3! Kid Kaos and Hardcore Robert advance in the tourney!! Big Moose and Rey both got up slowly while Detroit Love hit and Robert and Kaos celebrated. When Rey and Big Moose finally got up, they, along with Kaos and Robert started a staredown. Steven said,"They're both staring a hole through each other...I bet we see an ass beating.." Rey and Big Moose advanced along with Kaos and Robert and their hands met in a handshake. "Awww that's nice...they're showing respect for a job well done."Ken replied,"Damn!! I wanted to see a brawl!"
Lance Fortune/Mr. Lucky vs. Joe Hart/Crispy
"No Chance" hit and Joe Hart and Crispy walked out, amist boo's and hisses from the crowd. Hart and Crispy slid in calmly and then flipped off the crowd. Steven said,"Everyone hates Timothy Jones and his group. Everyone. Fans, wrestlers, you name'em." Ken replied,"NOT ME!!" as "Nobody's Real" hit and Lance Fortune walked out, throwing money to the crowd and getting a giant pop, while his fat father walked out throwing money as well. Mr. Lucky had a mic, slid in and begin to talk. He said, "My son has wrestled since he was four years old just like me. I've taught him everything I know so show him the respect he deserves! He is the greatest! However, I am just as great. Me and Lance fortune...we practice THE THREE M'S!! YES, THAT'S RIGHT!! Mind, Muscles, and most of all...MONEY!! Mind, Muscles and Money and you can be like us!! Now...for our opponents Joe Hart and Crispy..." The crowd began to boo. Ken said,"Steven, you need to practice all three M's! No mind...you're all flab, no muscles, and look at your shirt! A company shirt! No money!" Steven replied,"Yeah yeah whatever. Just listen to Mr. Lucky" Mr Lucky continued,"See, these guys have muscles, that's pretty obvious. Even if they are STEROID ENHANCED MUSCLES, THEY ARE MUSCLES. They have NO mind, since they are aligned with Timothy Jones...and obviously, and most important, NO MONEY! Steven said,"That's no way to score points with the guy who gave you your contracts...wow look at Joe!" Joe Hart was flaming mad and showed it with a huge clothesline to Mr. Lucky while Crispy worked on Lance Fortune. Joe quickly threw Mr Lucky over the ropes while Crispy destroyed Lance Fortune. Ken said,"Lance and Lucky just aren't cut out unless they have the money to back it up in the UWM" as Crispy low blowed Lance Fortune and slid outside. Steven said,"Here we go, hardcore style!!" Crispy pulled up the ring curtain and pulled out a chair. He slid back in and tried to whack Lance upside the head with it, but The Golden Child dropkicked the steel chair into Crispy's skull. Ken yelled,"OHHH DADDY WHAT A REVERSAL" as Mr Lucky, the fat old man was getting abused with the ring steps from Joe Hart, as he slammed Mr. Lucky into them and slammed them into Lucky's face. The Golden Child threw Crispy out while Joe Hart threw Mr. Lucky in. He laid him on the ground, criss crossed his legs in a submission and pulled back. Steven yelled,"DULLSHOOTER! All the money in the world won't get you out of that!" Suddenly, the Big TV powered up and the screen flashed,"Leave Now." Joe let go, go out of the ring, and left. Ken said,"What the Hell!? That was weird. HEY JOE, GET YOUR ASS BACK HERE!" Lance Fortune pulled a hurt Crispy into the ring with a chair. Mr. Lucky held him down while Lance put the chair around Crispy's leg. Lance ran at the ropes and legdropped Crispy's back on it. Ken yelled,"SPINNING LEGDROP!!" and Steven said,"Crispy's gonna get hurt, where the hell is Timothy Jones?" as Mr Lucky stomped on the chair and Crispy wailed in mercy. Finally, Lance Fortune pinned Crispy, whose leg was bent out of shape. 1..2...3! EMT's rushed in and wisked Crispy away as Mr. Lucky and Lance Fortune celebrated.
Slut TV Part 3
The Big TV powered up. Ken got excited again and said,"Yes! Is it! Is it!" Womankind appeared on the big TV. Ken yelled,"It is! YAAAAY!" Steven said, "Geez, Womankind sure is getting a lot of camera time this week..." Ken said,"Yeah I know, isn't it great!?" Steven said,"That's not what I meant..." Womankind looked towards the camera and said,"Hello again wrestling fans. Last time I left you, I was in the drug store with Rini. Well, in the very same mall, I spotted DDT in a clothing store. I guess whores stick together in bunches." Steven said,"That's not true. DDT and Rini probably had no idea they were within 500 miles of each other." Womankind continued,"Anyway, DDT is still in there. She picked out some clothes and is in the change room now." Womankind took the camera into the store and hid behind a display outside the change rooms. DDT came walking out in a low-cut top and a very short leather skirt. Ken yelled,"WHOA!!! Look at how low that top is cut! And look at how short that skirt is! GO DDT!" DDT changed back into her regular clothes, took the other clothes to the cash register, and paid for them. Womankind said,"Look at that. I'm 3 for 3 tonight in exposing sluts. Now, if I wasn't doing Slut TV this week, what would I be doing, you ask? Training so I can defend MY belt. Unlike these whores, I have better things to do with my time than sleep around with every guy that looks at me twice. Anyway, that's it for Slut TV this week." The Big TV powered down again. Ken said,"Wow. Quite a...revealing week here on Slut TV!"
Kid Kaos/Hardcore Robert vs. Studly Boys
Detroit Love hit the speakers and Kid Kaos and Hardcore Robert came out. "These guys could go all the way,"said Ken, "They are both hardcore." Detroit Love was cut off and the Studlys ran out and clubbed Kaos and Robert in the back. Pa Pa Ray was manhandling Kaos and suplexed him onto the steel ramp. "Then again, the Studleys are major hardcore in both ways,"said Ken. "Would you shut up,"said Steven. D-Buff had Robert and bulldogg'ed him on the ramp. "Ouch!" Kaos was getting up and Pa Pa Ray brought him down to the ring and slammed his back into the ring post. "Kaos is still hurt from the match at the ppv with Howie,"said Steven,"He shouldn't even be wrestling." D-Buff picked Robert up and brought him down to the ring. D-Buff tried to slam Robert into the ring steps, but Robert blocked and kicked D-Buff in the nuts. "CHRIST!! THATS TWICE TONIGHT!!"screamed Ken. D-Buff had a blank look in his eyes and Robert picked up the steel steps and hit D-Buff in the head. Pa Pa Ray saw Robert coming after him and dropkicked the steps into Robert's face. Pa Pa Ray picked Kaos up and was going yo powerslam him but Kaos slipped out and hit a swinging neckbreaker. Kaos helped Robert up and told him to set up a table. Kaos jumped onto the apron and onto the top rope. Robert set up the table and put both Studleys on the table. "He can't do this!! Theres no way!!"yelled Steven,"He'll really injure himself!!" Kaos jumped off and hit a huge frog splash onto both Studleys. "OOOOHHHHHHHHHH DDDDADDDYYYYYYYY!" Kaos layed limp on D-Buff and the ref counted 1,2, and Howie hit Kaos in the back with a chair. "WHERE THE HELL DID HE COME FROM!!"screamed Steven. Howie grabbed a spectators glass of beer, drank it, spun Robert around, and shattered the cup over his face. "WHAT THE HELL IS HE DOING!!"Howie set up a table and grabbed Robert to set him up for a pump-handle gutbuster. "NO, He Can't!!"screamed Steven. Howie lifted Robert and Robert went threw the table. "OOOOHHHHHHH DADDYYYYYY". D-Buff was getting up and was thanking Howie when Howie dented the chair over his head. Howie looked at Kaos trying to get up and threw him into the ring. Kaos was getting up and Howie jumped onto the toprope. Kaos stumbled up and Howie jumped off and swung the steel chair down onto Kaos's head. "JESUS CHRIST!!! GET SOME EMT'S, DOCTORS, ANYTHING!!"screamed Steven. "How about a mortician,"said Ken. Kaos just layed on the mat and Howie rolled out of the ring. Pa Pa Ray rolled into the ring and covered kaos, 1,2,3. Almost right after 3 EMT's came running out and got Kaos in a stretcher. D-Buff and Pa Pa Ray celebrated and seen Robert trying to help Kaos when Pa Pa Ray grabbed him from behind and reverse ddt'ed him down. D-Buff rolled out of the ring and brought in a table and set it up. Pa Pa Ray put a chair on the table and set Robert up for 3s. D-Buff climbed the rope and jumped off hitting 3s on the chair through the table.. "OOOOHHHHHHH DDDAAADDDYYYYY." "I'm gonna have nightmares,"said Steven. Another group of EMT's came out and put Robert on a stretcher. Studleys laughed as Robert and Kid Kaos were taken away.
Joe hart Backstage
Timothy Jones and his group, Triple X, Adam Blackman, DDT, John Carter and Timothy Jones were discussing strategy backstage when Joe Hart came up to them. Joe said softly to Timothy,"Listen up man..I know you brought me up from the ashes in UWM. You gave me the numerous title shots, and all that. But..I kinda..." he drifted off. John Carter said,"Kinda what?" Joe replied,"Well Timmy, I kinda find a new boss, a new leader. It's time for me to take the ball...AND RUN WITH IT!!" Joe smiled at Tim while he and his group looked on dumbfounded. Suddenly, all 5 dove onto him. Adam Blackman, DDT, John Carter, Crispy and Triple X were holding him back and choking him out while Timothy Jones beat the crap out of him. He yelled,"JOE, YOU THINK YOU CAN GET BY IN THIS COMPANY WITHOUT ME!? YOU GOT NO CHANCE!"
Studly Boys vs. Lance Fortune/Mr. Lucky
Ken said,"Well, my favorite pair, Rini didn't win but maybe the Studly Boys or Lance Fortune and Mr. Lucky can." The Studly Boys came out with their cart of weapons. Lance Fortune and Mr. Lucky came out next with a cart of money. Ken yelled,"I'VE NEVER SEEN SO MUCH MONEY!" Lance and Mr. Lucky gave it out in handfulls to the crowd. Steven said,"It's like getting a free front row ticket when Lance and Mr. Lucky come out." Ken said,"This is the third time they've come out. Those are the luckiest people in the crowd!" The Pa Pa Ray got the mic and said,"You LOSERS can't pay off the St-St-St-" D-Buff smacked him and Pa Pa Ray yelled,"STUDLY BOYS!" Lance and Mr. Lucky got into the ring and the bell rang. Lance put his hand out and motioned for the mic. He got it and said,"Hold up, Cream Puff. No one wants to see this perfect face get all messed so I'm just gonna sit back and relax while my friend takes care of both of you." Steven said,"He can't mean Mr. Lucky." Suddenly, the crowd went wild. Ken said,"What the Hell is going on!" Steven yelled,"It's Joe Hart! Mr. Lucky....must be his new boss!" Joe slid into the ring with a chair and bashed it into Pa Pa Ray's head. D-Buff ran at him and got a chair shot. Ken said,"Both Studlys are laid out!" as Triple X, Adam Blackman, John Carter, and Timothy Jones came out. They got into the ring and Triple X and Adam attacked Joe. Lance and Mr. Lucky jumped on their shoulders. Adam, who Mr. Lucky jumped on, went down but Triple X didn't. Triple X threw Lance over the toprope and then, Joe hit him with huge clothesline. Timothy Jones and John Carter stomped away on Mr. Lucky and Adam Blackman nailed Joe with his Kendo Stick. Adam picked Joe up and gave him the dvd. Triple X got up and gave Joe the Sexdegree. When Mr. Lucky was laid out, Timothy and John came over and helped beat on Joe. D-Buff crawled over to Mr. Lucky and pinned. The ref ran over there and counted 1..2..3. Ken yelled,"The Studly Boys are the first Hardcore Tag Team Champions!" Pa Pa Ray and D-Buff grabbed their belts and left not wanting to get involved in the fight. Joe was being held down and Timothy Jones was screaming in his face. The sound of glass shattering filled the arena and Timothy Jones turned around in fear as PD Derek was already in the ring. Adam ran at him and got a Powerslam. Triple X got up and got the Sex-Factor from Derek. John pleaded with Derek but a got clothesline. Mr. Jones got a chair and hit Derek in the back with it. Derek didn't go down. He turned around and Timothy Jones tried to get out of the ring but Derek grabbed him. Derek lifted him up and gave him the Sex-Factor on the chair. Steven yelled,"GOOD GOD! Timothy Jones is busted open!" Derek stood on the turnbuckle with his hands held high. Ken said,"PD Derek and Mr. Jones will never get along. I'm sure that Mr. Jones will have something to say about this next week."