"anyone? anyone?"

5/25/99

Went to see Election tonight. I was the only person in the theater until halfway through the previews. I was totally weird--maybe my blood sugar was playing games, or something. I sat in my seat, dead center, listening to the pre-movie soundtrack, which was from that Star Wars movie. I lined up all my gummi bears in little rows according to color, and ate all the ones with imperfections. I spoke to the gummi bears. "What's the little jagged edge by your shoulder? Sorry, man." "Hey, why are you all lopsided? Better luck next time." Then I made sure I had the same number of each color. All the extras I ate in one big swipe, making Tim Allen grunt noises under my breath.

I looked around and affirmed that I was alone, but that didn't make me any less crazy.

When the pre-preview film came on, telling me to be quiet so as not to disturb others, I said aloud, "Oooh, I better be quiet." After the first couple of previews, a few people straggled in. We were all in a similar mood. Throughout the movie, something funny would happen on the screen and one person--always someone different--would react audibly.

The movie was really good. I'd almost say it was better than the book. Really. The focus was shifted away from the student-teacher affair, and a few details were enhanced, but the details made the movie fantastic. I especially liked the way the girl's name, "FLICK" looked like "FUCK" when she spelled it on the cupcakes.

It was rather disturbing to see Matthew Broderick in the teacher role. He had the look of the aging, unattractive, no-money teacher. I hate that look. Pasty, graying, the discomfort of early middle age, at the mercy of the public school system. They caught him right in it. I used to have a crush on Matthew Broderick, back in the Bueller days.

My own teaching was uneventful. No tantrums, no flowers.