Welcome
to my world of bandgeekism, which we swear is no a cult! |
| ¾ TIME: A way to keep the band
continuously out of step. AIR: The driving force behind brass instruments, but generally lacks in woodwinds, therefore causing squeaks. ALTO SAXOPHONE: A musical instrument that either plays very loud or not at all between squeaks. AUXILIARY: See COLOR-GUARD. BAND CAMP: 1. a set of cabins in a rural setting, used to house band members and their stashed food; stashed food needed for survival. See BAND CAMP FOOD.2. a time when freshmen are known, and the upperclassmen set up their reign on the freshmen. 3. can be a time for fun if you have Silly String, Water Guns, Duct Tape, and Shaving Cream... BAND CAMP FOOD: food that has been tested and denied approval of the FDA; is served to the inhabitants of band camps. BANDGEEK: The state of a band member who is willing to give up all free time during season. BANDGEEKISM: Something that is related to marching band which spontaneously happens (such as walking with friends down the hall in step or whistling warm-ups or scales without thinking about it). (scales and music obliviously) BAND JACKET: 1. Status symbol. 2. Proclamation of true geekdom. BAND PARENTS: The only parents that a band geek sees between August and December. The only reason the band is held together. BAND PARTY: A gathering of Band Geeks where they can wear their Band Jackets and usually get it on. BARI-SAXOPHONE: An instrument for woodwind saxophone players who want to play like a tuba. BARITONE: 1. A device for doubling with trombones except using the right notes. Also used for playing during silence. BASS CLARINET: A concert instrument that, when used properly, is still not heard. BASSOON: An unusual hybrid between a bass clarinet and oboe which remains unused in marching. BRASS: Metallic looking and sounding devices designed to over-blow and blast. BUS: 1. A good way to get to know someone (nudge, nudge, wink, wink, if you know what I mean), however the most painful way in the world to watch a movie. CADENCE: A way of making the crowd forget the parade march the band just played that impresses people. Good time for band section visuals. CLARINET: A device which, when used properly, will cause the user's shoulders to point towards the end-zone. COLLAR: Something thy hair shalt never toucheth. COLOR-GUARD: People who carry flags, and rifels, but watch out sometimes they might become armed. COMPETITION: 1. A general gathering of bands so everyone can prove that they're better than everybody else. CONDUCTOR: The person in the front who waves his arms and dances wildly to the music. DOUBLE REED: A good way to make a band member's face look like they just ate a lemon. DRUMMER: People in the band that hit these round things with sticks usually they don't play at the same time or even not at all. DRUM MAJOR: See CONDUCTOR. DRUM: Round hollow devices with covering on the top and sometimes the bottom. Loud. DYNAMICS: Either loud or louder (volume). EARLY: To never be. Reasoning: To be early is to be on time, while to be on time is to be late, but to be late is to never be. Following this through, early is to never be. EARLY MORNING: a Form of torture that the band is put through at Band Camp. Things drummers never show up to. ECHO: What a band geek should hear after a good cut-off. FIELD: 100 yards in length, this is a wide expanse of mud on which bands perform. Contained within the area of this expanse are frequent sprinklers with occasional patches of grass. FLUTE: An un-tuned device for people who want to be in the band who have weak arms and don't wish to be heard. FOOD: What bands can't eat while on break. Also stuff people sneak to you in the stands. FOOTBALL TEAM: The main reason the band can't always use the marching field. The reason our friday nights are tied up from August to November. FORMER BAND GEEK: The name given to a person who was in band, quit, and now returns (usually with food) to rehearsals to watch just for fun. FORTE: The lowest dynamic marking a brass instrument can play at. FRENCH HORN: Only brass instrument that is played with left hand. Involves strings in conjunction with valves and an impossibility to play fast or loud. FRESHMEN: Designed to make up half the size of the band. FRESHMAN INITIATION: A form of entertainment to all alumni/upper-classmen. FULL UNIFORM: A form of torture consisting of Urkel pants, pants that usually don't fit, a heavy jacket, black pointy shoes, black socks and plumes. GRADUATED BAND GEEK: Someone who no longer attends the school or is over-age for a drum corps., so he is no longer in the band but still comes back each year. HALT: A time when everyone is theoretically stopped. HARMONY: All voices except the melody and percussion. INSTRUCTOR: Person who tells you when you're screwing up. INSTRUMENT: A device used for torture. INTERVAL: A space between two band members that is random and constantly changes throughout the year. IQ: A constant combined number that does not changes as the size of the band does. LAPS: Possibly a new form of torture this marching season. MALLET: Things Drummers like to throw during band. see also STICKS. MARCHING SHOES: Ugly, comfy, relatively inexpensive footwear. MARK-TIME: A time when people only move their feet (without changing location) to some tempo, usually "to the beat of a different drum." MELLOPHONE:(flugel horn)A tunable version of a marching french horn. MELODY: The loudest voice, usually carried by the trumpets or piccolos. MEMORIZATION: An action that is supposed to take place in conjunction with sets and music between band camp and the commencement of the regular year, but does not generally happen, except by true band geeks and freshmen who want to impress someone. MEZZO-FORTE: The highest dynamic marking of any woodwind excluding the piccolo. MOUTHPIECE: A critical piece to a brass instrument which is meant to be dropped or thrown onto grass, loud stages, and/or sometimes mud if not forgotten. MUD: A substance that the school wishes to grow and therefore waters the field every night in hopes of increasing (VERY entertaining sometimes) MUSIC: 1. Papers which contain little black lines and dots with strange symbols that somehow show what the music is to sound like. 2. The succession of these notes that, in theory, should sound good. Unfortunately,we're not all in Theory - we're in Marching Band. NOTES: 1. Little round dots on lines that show the approximate pitch that the instrument player tries to hit. OBOE: A double-reed instrument used for obtaining a clarinet sound in a piccolo range. ON TIME: To never be. See reasoning for EARLY. PERCUSSION: The group of instruments hit by sticks or mallets that keeps some beat or another. People in here eat, sleep, and breath percussion. PICCOLO: A high-pitched instrument similar to that of the flute, only you can actually hear that it's out of tune. PLUMES: Those funny, yet annoying "chickens" that are SUPPOSED TO add "flair" to a band uniform. See FULL UNIFORM. PRACTICE: The constant repetition of a sequence of notes in an unsuccessful attempt to become skilled. Usually drives family members either away from home or insane. 2. What most of us don't do. RAIN: Nature's way of telling the woodwinds to go inside and practice music. REED: 1. A piece of wood that makes a great excuse for not playing well (particularly for brass instruments) if broken or brand new. Usage: "Sorry, new reed," or "I broke my reed." 2. A device used to efficiently cut one's finger. REHEARSAL: Time used by band geeks to forget anything learned during practice. RIFLE: Things the colorguard carries. Unfortunately, live ammunition is sometimes granted. SECTION LEADER: A person in band that is head of his or her section.2. they are supposed to make their section practice but it rarely happens. SENIOR: A source of constant guilt trips. SLOW: What always happens when the band is marching is usually caused by the percussion section. SLOW MARCH: what no one but the truely skilled can do in band. SNAP: Instantly changing a horn's position from attention to 'horns up' or vice-versa. Havoc for someone in front of a snapped instrument. SQUEAK: The only sign that the woodwind reeds give that they are actually playing. SUSPENDERS: The most effective way to strangle a band geek while still keeping their pants up. TEMPO: The correct beat, usually (but not always) carried by the conductor. TENOR-SAXOPHONE: An instrument similar to the bari-saxophone, except it matches the pitch of a trombone or baritone. TRUMPET: An instrument that is designed to make a band sound better. The idea is that if the trumpets play loud enough, you can't hear the rest of the band, so only the trumpets' mistakes are heard, not everyone else's. TROMBONE: A device with the same pitch as a baritone, except that it uses a slide instead of valves, so it's easier to forget the position(s). TUBA: A concert sousaphone that is extremely heavy. TUNE: What the condition when all instruments are within half a step of each other is called. VALVE: A key object on most brass instruments that sticks only during important performances and solos. WANNABE BAND GEEK: Someone who hangs out with true band geeks. WOODWINDS: 1. A true sign that God has a sense of humor. 2. A biological mistake. YELLING: What the band director(s) will do this year 2. What old band geeks do when someone else is wrong, out of step, or just stupid. |
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