Hi I'm Ralph LaFrenz. My job is to keep you posted on "whats up" in the world.
Contrary to most beliefs, I, Ralph Paulo Lafrenz, am not the self-centered, shallow, water skier that most people think I am. Actually, that is Jäson and Keith, the stupid jerks responsible for that lame CuddleBreeders
webpage. I am a slave in my own country. Forced to work the "German" 60 hr work week, I find little time to do anything. But here's what i like (time permitting):
Water Skiing oh what can bring more joy than getting wet in the first few moments of dawn. Most recreational 'skiers don't wear a wet-suit. I do, it keeps me warm and and my body protected (I can do a flip, bare footed!) I've been water skiing since I was 13. I used to go down the coast to Naples and use my Uncle Guiseppi's boat. I was skiing with my cousin once when the outboard motor detached from the boat while he was skiing. The prop was still going strong when it took off his left leg. Sorry Tony...
My Beanie Babies
I also collect Beanie Babies in my spare time. I have 47 of them right now. A lot of people ask me what my favorite is. Thats a tough one...i'd have to go with Scoop the Pelican. I also think that the teeny beenies that they sell periodicly at McDonalds are an embarassment to all the real Beanie Collectors. Only ametuers collect that crap. Once I sent in a recomendation to the TY company that they make a "Snapper the Turtle" beanie and guess what!? They did!
P.S. I have a Peace Bear for sale. Only $25! Get in contact with me if you are seriously interested.
Techno/Trance/House
Since I'm Italian, it only seems natural to have one musical love. Before I moved to the USA and started working at this piece of crap operation, I DJ'd at some of the "most happenin'" (i do love american phrases) clubs in Rome, Milan, and Venice. I still can work the dual turn tables and "wreck" the Roland XJ5000 sequencer. Jäson promised that i could DJ all CuddleBreeder sanctioned events (Xmas, New Year's, President's Day, take-your-daughter-to-work day, etc.) Liar. My most recent gig was a Lion's Club "Fish Fry." My pay: a free dinner. thanks for nothing! I like my music loud. Keith used to let me play my music every morning between the hours of 7&8 AM. I can't anymore because it's not at a "reasonable level." Whatever. James, Phil, and Nancy loved it! So to Keith I say: caccati in mano e prenditi a schiaffi!
Honda Goldwing
My Honda Goldwing touring cycle rocks! it's a 1987, tan, with 80,000 miles. i have a leather jacket like the Fonz and an awesome helmet with an "angel riding a unicorn over a rainbow." it's not "tough," but i like unicorns. oh, me and my "hog" go waaaaay back....the summer of '98 i drove to Kansas for vacation, 1999 i drove to Daytona Bike Weekend - only to get "screwed over" by some Polish crotch rocketers(!), taking Keith (when he was nice, cool, and considerate) to jazz dance lessons. Also, Jäson: I know you pushed over my "ride" @ Scores last weekend. grow up.
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