Welcome to the picture gallery of dr_dell
RiskyJokes | |
Picture Gallery is under constructions.Jokes are here |
Two bowling teams, one of all blondes and one
of all brunettes,
charter a double-decker bus for a weekend for a bowling tournament
in Atlantic City.
The brunette team rides in the bottom of the bus, and the blonde
team rides on the top level. The brunette team down below is
whooping it up, having a great time, when one of them realizes
she doesn't hear anything from the blondes upstairs.
She decides to go up and investigate. When the brunette reaches
the top, she finds all the blondes frozen in fear, staring straight
ahead at the road and clutching the seats in front of them. They
all had white knuckles.
The brunette says, "What's goin' on up here? We're having a great
time downstairs!"
One of the blondes looks up and says to her, "Yeah, but you've got
a driver!"
Two nuns took their first trip outside the
convent. They had never
seen a baseball game, so they got tickets. Once inside, they sat in
the bleachers, and hearing a vender selling hot dogs, one said, "We've
never had hot dogs before," and they decided to order a couple.
The first nun unwrapped her hot dog, and proceeded to quickly wrap it
up again, saying, "Oh, my!"
"What's wrong, sister?" asked her companion.
"Well," came the reply, "which part of the dog did you get?"
A couple went on vacation to a fishing resort
up
north. The husband liked to fish at the crack of dawn.
The wife liked to read.
One morning the husband returned after several hours
of fishing and decided to take a short nap. Although
she wasn't familiar with the lake, the wife decided to
take the boat. She rowed out a short distance,
anchored, and returned to reading her book. Along came
the sheriff in his boat. He pulled up alongside her
and said, "Good morning, Ma'am. What are you doing?"
"Reading my book," she replied...as she thought to
herself, "duh -- isn't it obvious?"
"You're in a restricted fishing area," he informed her.
"But officer, I'm not fishing. Can't you see that?"
"Yes, but you have all the equipment. I'll have to
take you in and write you up."
"If you do that, I'll have to charge you with rape,"
snapped the irate woman.
"But, I haven't even touched you," groused the sheriff.
"Yes, that's true, she replied, "but you do have all the
equipment."
A couple of women were playing golf one
sunny Saturday morning. The
first of the twosome Teed Off and watched in horror as her ball
headed directly toward a foursome of men playing the next hole.
Indeed, the ball hit one of the men, and he immediately clasped his
hands together at his crotch, fell to the ground and proceeded to
roll around in evident agony.
The woman rushed down to the man and immediately began to apologize.
She then explained that she was a physical therapist:
"Please allow me to help. I'm a physical therapist and I know I
could relieve your pain if you'd just allow me!" she told him
earnestly.
"Ummph, oooh, nnoo, I'll be all right.... I'll be fine in a few
minutes," he replied breathlessly as he remained in a fetal position
still clasping his hands together at his crotch.
But she persisted: and he finally allowed her to help. She gently took
his hands away and laid them to the side, loosened his pants and put
her hands inside, beginning to massage him.
"How does that feel?" she asked.
"It feels great." He replied. "But my thumb still hurts like
hell!".
Husband (A computer Professor) returning late
from work:
Husband: "Hi dear. I'm logged in"
Wife: Have you brought the grocery?
Husband: Bad command or file name
wife: But I told you in the morning ?
Husband: Erroneous syntax. Abort, retry, cancel?
Wife: What about my new TV ?
Husband: Variable not found
Wife: At least, give me your credit card. I need to do some shopping
Husband: Sharing violation. Access denied
Wife: It was a great mistake that I married an idiot like you
Husband: Data type mismatch
Wife: You are useless
Husband: By default
Wife: What about your salary ?
Husband: File in use. Try after some time
Wife: Who was in the car this morning ?
Husband: System is unstable. Press ALT + CTRL + DEL to reboot
Wife: Are you going to have some snacks ?
Husband: File system full
Wife: What is the relation between you and your receptionist ?
Husband: only user with WRITE permission
Wife: What is my value in this family ?
Husband: Unknown virus
Wife: Do you love me or your computer or you're being just funny ?
Husband: Too many parameters !
Wife: I will go to my dad's house.
Husband: This program has performed an illegal operation and will be
terminated
Wife: I'll leave you forever
Husband: Close all programs and logout and then login as another user
Wife: It's worthless talking to you
Husband: Shutdown the computer
Wife: I'm going
Husband: It's now safe to turn off your computer
Is there something missing???
Keep in touch with this page and with me as well...n if u wanna some pic added here just mail it to me on drimranqamar@hotmail.com, i hope that would be
added soon after recieving.
|