And before you can say.... a brief tribute to Kenny Everitt


I must say I was surprised when the idea was suggested to write a little thingo about Kenny Everitt, surely a huge departure from the normal gloom and doom (of the highest order of course) that regularly lines the pages of The Fall of Because. But after all, there is always a light at the end of the tunnel, and that light always starts with a good dick gag.
Cuddly Ken rose from the bowels of British radio in the 60's to end out on those videos that everyone gets out every now and then. He was a comedian, a dj, a space captain, a friend to the stars, a transvestite and a mouth on a stick. His completely original but ridiculous style of comedy brings out the giggling schoolgirl in all of us. How can anyone forget the Kenny Everitt Video Show with its overload of double entredres and abundance of lumpy bits. Surly the saucy grinding of his in-house smut patrol, "Hot Gossip" has influenced many a young pop starlet to wear green short pants with feathers and prance around slapping themselves, knowing full well that everyone is going to fast forward past it on the video.
Most of his jokes were pretty lame, every look really cheap and the guest pop stars that occasionally appeared on the show are incredibly dated (except when Thin Lizzy were on it), but Everitt is such a goddamn funny bastard to listen to and look at that while other comedians of his era rot away on the video shop shelves, Kenny vids aren't even there! Because most of them have been stolen by some other Kenny loving geek.
I'm not sure when he died, but I think it was of Aids in the late 80's- early 90's sometime but his legacy lives on.
I can only highly recommend getting hold of some Kenny if you're up for a bit of titillation and laffs.
Here is an exert from an autobiography he released in 1982 called "The Custard Stops at Hatfield."

Kenny on Kenny

'"From an ancient manuscript sent to Rome by a Governor of Judea, Publius Lentulus in about 7 BC: He is tall and elegantly shaped, his hair falling in graceful curls, agreeably couching on his shoulders, his cheeks without blemish and of roseate hue, and his beard thick, reaching a little below his chin and parting in the middle".
From an ancient manuscript sent to a filing cabinet by a registration clerk, Manny Hansmakelightwork, in about 1944 AD: He is small and shaped like a hot-water bottle; his hair falls like a premature Brillo Pad; his cheeks look like a relief map of India and his thick tongue reaches a little below his teeth and dribbles a lot'.
The subject of the first description is Jesus Christ with whom the subject of the second, me, has nothing in common with except the birthday and the beard."



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