I'm in love with a Feral Vandal, but I don't care!

A little while ago I was at the market one fine afternoon, admiring all the wonderful Hobart produce. Things made from Huon pine, Valhalla ice cream, other things made from Huon pine, that poet guy who always gives me a funny look when I walk past,(I have been meaning to buy one of your books I swear),more things made from Huon pine, the people I buy my potatoes off, and still more things made from bloody Huon pine.
But today's visit was to consist of more than, do a lap, see if there are any cute girls, buy some apples and then go home. And girls don't write in and complain. Like you all go there just to look at the second hand Bibles.
Today was to be a fateful day indeed. For I was to fall for a woman who I know would be no good for me.
It all started, as it always does, with me noticing two girls walking in front of me. But the kind of noticed as in you noticed them so you wouldn't walk into them.
Any way I walked off and forgot all about them. Until I heard a noise like a thud. A thud like somebody kicking somebody else's stall. But I didn't take much notice, well you wouldn't, would you. This was followed by the owner of the said stall calling out "Hey, that wasn't very nice!" This too I would have barely remembered if it had not been for the person who had done the not very nice thing walking away with her friend saying, "Yes, I know, I don't care, fuck you, I hate you, I hate you!"
And as this voice came up behind me and then over took me, it turned out to be the girls I'd seen before.
"Fuck you, I hate you, I hate you!" NOW THAT IS MY KIND OF BIRD!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Walking away with total indifference and hatting with total defiance. God, I almost asked her to marry me! But I didn't because that's the kind of guy I am. Shy, retiring, and vulnerable when it comes to girls. Oh, wow is me!
My advice to all the lonely guys and girls out there who are looking for that someone special, take heart, they are out there.

Peter Hilton


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