NICKY

NICKY: RETURN

LIFE__Yeah, Nick has one. A wife and a kid, two off-center pals, a Ta-Ching_56,
affection for matters technical and a partner who never saw a man she didn't enjoy ... shooting.

Nick DeLeon, Vitalle, Hricko ... they're tight. Everybody knows that - anybody in the first circle - anybody who matters in Charleston where a man speaks less and character holds first place. Narration belongs to Nick. You will find no explicit gore or porn. Swearing is the perps liberty, and sometimes the ladies ...
Otherwise, Nick DeLeon narrates as a gentleman, southron and gracious as circumstance allows. However, the crime stories reflect adult themes not intended for children. Ofcourse Charleston itself speaks.
The graphics reflect Nicks home on Colonial Lake as Charleston Penninsula divides, part of the SOB section. This historic district near Charleston Battery is better known for beauty than virtue.

Undercover like I was City Station would cover my wife ... with a coupla' donut munching rookies. Crap! I was looking for cover - personal cover. Hard cover  for Eve and I knew the man to do it. Vitalle. He ran the Charleston docks, floated them and the unions on a green sea. And when he got mad he bit tires and broke arms. He advised Hricko, as his second, a man ta throw an electronic curtain over Eve. And tho I hated the pervo he grifted keyboards for breakfast - assembler for lunch and I didn't know the enemy. Not exactly. So I'm here, at a 2-bit bar trading pox with two bad men who can do a hard job.

Two's plenty. Damn the women ...! Over there, by the windows looking out to an Ashley River oily as planters boots.

Tough luck if they spotted me. But it didn't figure. I had worn Hricko's ancient windbreak, to the bar and it stank invisible, dried Cod'r salt that's murder on Charleston intuition. Plenty invisible.
Annie and Frieda should'a PGPed their email! Some paws gotta scratch, and a dame's never shifty enough to dodge. None a' that 'hiding-in-plain-sight' crap ... but ...  they could catch the stained back and a pilot's cap pulled over -  not me. Not with Vitalle and Hricko hacking Straights and bunched around like a bear and a bald hawk in the corner table where the chops are still hot and the Wild Turkey cold.

Pussars Cafe is like that. Hot and cold. The young blond waitress knew Hricko well and Vitalle but not me. Strictly tradecraft --- those two rapped the Charleston-to-Awaik race blue water showing end of the month. My Ta-Ching crew. Ha!  They scared me worse than a dark alley or sailing two points into a force 5. But I'd take the cover and smile ... they didn't bug me, with crosswind chatter like did the two gal coppers, Annie Rains and Frieda Wye, rapping with Sammy-the-Mole, rapping serious and rapping about me. About my health.  Strictly accident, but I take me real personal ... especially when two bricks in the blue wall fish a private eye from the sewer to write an insurance policy.
Directly behind us, they sat two table over, against the huge plate glass windows looking out from Pussar's Cafe to the Ashley River Marina. Annie and Frieda rocked on one bench like a pair of blue-water schooners - Sammy like a photo-sensitive garbage scow hunched and pinned and drilled into the glass.

Sammy had nose up ... talk was loud and insistant. The window rattled. I caught the echo. From Annie with the grim model's face, new silver bars and husband dead of bad luck. And from Frieda with the demanding voice and 357 S&W.
"LOOK, SAMMY, WHILE NICK'S OUTA TOWN, WE JUST WANT YOU TO SHAMPOO HIS TA-CHING. GIVE IT THE RUBDOWN EVERY NIGHT.",
"HEH, FRIEDA, WHAT DOES IT LOOK LIKE I GOT A GOLD EARING AND DISHPAN HANDS? BESIDES, THE OCEAN MAKES ME SEASICK, SALT YAKNOW, HYPERTENSE KILLS A MAN LIKE TOO MUCH VIAGRA.",
"ITS AT THE DOCK, SAMMY, FIFTY YARDS FROM HERE. TAKE YOUR NOSE OFF FOR A GANDER ... IF THAT HELPS ...",
"HEH, MISS IMSOBLODRIEDICOULD CRAP GOLD ... I GET COMPLIMENTS - IM A LONGDISTANCE FELLA ...",
"SEE, FRIEDA, JUST LIKE I SAID, SAMMY GETS EMOTIONALLY INVOLVED REAL EASY. GO ORIENTAL, THIS TIME, WITH NICK'S TA-CHING!",
"SO FIFTY YARDS FIFTY MILES ITS STILL THE OCEAN AND SHARKS SPAWN UPSTREAM I HAD A COUSIN DROWN IN A WADING POOL NEXT TO THE OCEAN WITH A LIFEGUARD EVERY FIFTY YARDS.",
"THE MAN WON'T TALK TO ME, ANNIE.",
"THEN LET'S SCRUB HIM, FRIEDA.",
"YUM - WHERE'S THE BRILLO!",

Crap. It made my ears hurt ta hear that crap. Vitalle had just hammered down his forth rye and glanced over at the threesome. THEY GONNA HELP YA TOO, NICKY? 
I said THE GIRLS ARE KIND-HEARTED. 
Vitalle blew a Habanaos cloud over the table even Castro couldn't afford. I GOT TWO PITBULLS PULLED OFF DOCK SECURITY GONNA SHADOW THE WIFE WHILE YER GONE. THEY ONLY KILLED A COUPLE GUYS SO THEIR SAFE ... BABE-IN-ARMS KNOW WHAT I MEAN?
"YEAH, TONY ... Hricko smirked. BET THEY READ THE CARTOONS ONCE A MONTH. CAN THEY FIND COLONIAL LAKE? 
Vitalle grunted. THEY CAN FIND IT HRICKO IF ONLY TA DUMP YOUR AZZ IN WITH BIG-IRON BOOTS. Vitalle was kidding. ... I knew he was kidding ... From his toothy smile, I knew he was kidding Hricko too. 
 Hricko stopped smirking. GET ME THE T3 TO BETHESDA ?
 Vitalle snatched at his fifth rye. YEAH, I BOUGHT ONE YESTERDAY. 
No ... 
YES ...! 
Hrickos electronic curtain, the T3 ... Eve would vanish in electronic noise, Hricko said and now he had almost stopped breathing. And to us all the crap that Sammy-the-mole rapped away two tables over seemed almost human.
 
"HEH, LOOK, I GOT NO PROBLEM WITH COPPERETTE IN SPRAYPAINT BLUE AND YEAH, I OWE NICKY TWO DIMES BUT HES TAKEN' ANOTHER VACATION WHERE WHO KNOWS MAYBE HE GETS A SUNTAN, HUH THO THAT AIN'T WHAT THE STREET SEZ JUST BECAUSE CAPT'N MARSH CANT FIND A RAG OR A MULE DRIVER ...",
"IS THIS PERVO TALKING ABOUT ME, ANNIE - I JUST WASHED THIS BLOUSE!",
"FRIEDA, YOU MEAN THE MAN WHO VICE BUSTED LAST WEEK WITH THE FIFTEEN YEAR OLD?",
"WAX-ON-A-WAMBAT ... OOOONO I AIN'T TAKEN' THAT DIVE SHE WAS SIXTEEN ... SHE SWORE SHE WAS SIXTEEN ... OR AT LEAST HER TWIN SISTER HOW MUCH YOUNGER COULD SHE BE AND JEEZ SHE HAD PLENTY.",
"AND THE HASH, SAMMY?",
"HEH - THOSE CUBES WERE UNREFINED SUGAR BROWN GRAINY KNOW WHAT I MEAN HOW CAN A MAN STA HEALTHY THESE DAYS?",
"YOU BELIEVE THIS, FRIEDA ... SUGAR, HUH AND THE LAB SEZ 18% THC ... SOME SUGAR SAMMY, FOR THE UNDERAGE SUGAR. YA KNOW, THE JUDGE GOT A DAUGHTER JUST ABOUT HER AGE ...",

Some rap, the gals laid on Sammy ... I buried a smile in cold Turkey. Sammy-the-mole was sweating like a fur seal in Samoa and the gals lapping it up. For my taste, a bit too eager,",
"Even for cops. Even for Sammy. A woman wants to make a man sweat like that ... she should marry him. Like a married man, the creep had even forgotton his own story....

"WA...WA...WAIT A MINUTE YOUSE TWO GOT THE EVIDENCE MIXED UP SINCE I AIN'T SEEN A CUBE SINCE RUBIC AND WHO GROWS CHRONIC IN POLAND?",
"LISTEN, ANNIE, TO THE LITTLE WEASEL LIE. YOU HAD A POCKET FULLA FLAKES, SAMMY - YOU CALL THAT CORN?",
"FLAKES, YEAH, I ADMITTED THAT. WE WERE EATING ITALIAN ... A ROMANTIC EVENING AT POSIE'S GRILL ... THEY GOT LITTLE EARS STICK IN END A' THE CORN, SO YA SHAKE THIS, SHAKE THAT PRETTY SOON WHO KNOWS WHAT SHAKIN'? HONEST, FRIEDA BETWEEN CHICKEN-FRY STEAK AND CHOCOLATE ECLAIR IT LOOKED LIKE OREGANO TO ME!",
"HOW BAD IS THIS JERK BUSTED, FRIEDA? UNDER-AGE, UNDER THE INFLUENCE ... SAMMY, THAT'S THREE-TO-SIX IN THE BIG STILL AND THE GUYS THERE ARE ALL BIGGER THAN YOU ARE TALL ... SAMMY KEEPS TELLIN' ME HE LIKES ME, GONNA GIVE ME THE HEAT LIKE MR BARBEQUE BUT WHEN HE GETS OUT, HE AIN'T GONNA HAVE ANYTHING TO LIKE!",
"ANNIE, FRIEDA ... YOU WOULDN'T DO THAT, NOT TO A STRAIGHT JAKE ... OKEY SO I CRUISE THE ROWBOAT, MY NIGHTLY CONSTITUTIONAL ON THE DOCKS ... WHAT AM I LOOKIN' FOR?",
"CAN WE TRUST THIS SEWER-SLIME?",
"ON NICKY'S ROWBOAT ... HE'D BUST YOUR CHOPS, SAMMY, FOR CALLING HIS TA-CHING A ROWBOAT.",
"HOW 'BOUTS THIS, SAMMY, WE FIGURE ... SAY ... HUNDRED KILOS, MAYBE ONE-FIFTY.",
"KILOS! HUNDREDS?",
"YEAH, SAMMY, YOU POKE AROUND REAL GOOD. CHECK THE HULL-LINE ... CLIMB THE MAST. YOU AIN'T AFRAIDA HEIGHTS, ARE YA?",
"BUT ...BUT HEH I GET DIZZY ON A STEP-LADDER BUT KEY-RICE ... YOU MEAN OL-THREE-BALLS IS RUNNIN' DOPE THESE DAYS? I NEVER FIGURED HIM FOR IT.",
"THAT NOSE OF YOURS, SAMMY, SURE KNOWS HOW TO GET WHERE NOBODY WANTS IT!",
"MAYBE YOU DAMES THINK SO, BUT ... BUT I KNOW A STRAIGHT JAKE. NICKY AIN'T NO MODERN SHARPER NOSIREE.",
"A 15TH CENTURY MAN, ASK ME ... NICKY WITH HASH? NOT WITH THE RICH WIFE, NOT WITH THE KID. NOT WITH ... NOT WITH THE HOLY CITY",
"DID I SAY HASH, SAMMY? SEMTEC, SAMMY ...",
"YEAH, YA LITTLE WEASEL, LISTEN TO FRIEDA! CHECZO SEMTEC. A HUNDRED KILOS OF IRISH PLAYDOE ... SLOVAK SAUSAGE ON A STICK ... NOT HASH SAMMY.",
"HEH, THAT STUFF EXPLODES ... WHOSE AFTER DELEON? NOT JERRY-THE ARAB IS IT ... OH JEEZ, NOT HIM, BOOBS-IN-A-BALAST-TANK!",
"WE DON'T KNOW, SAMMY, BUT YOUR GONNA MAKE SURE NOTHING GETS PUT ON NICKY'S ROWBOAT!",

"AND IF I MAKE A MISTAKE? Sammy was sweating like a rat in a cobra_cage. HEH, HOW COME YOU GALS STOPPED TALKIN' ... HEH C4 AIN'T LIKE D# IT DON'T JUST BREAK A STRING..... SURE YOU GALS AIN'T GONNA GET ME A REDUCED SENTENCE ...",

Right then Hricko started mumbling I DON'T LIKE THESE PALS, TONY ...
Vitalle broke in scratching his skeptic eyeball over my face. THAT'S YOU, NICKY YA GOT A SENTENCE HOW BOUTS I REDUCE IT. HOW BOUTS I GET SOMEONE IN SEATTLE KEEP AN EYE OPEN .. SEATTLE GOT DOCKS TOO. 
I said THANKS BUT NO. I GOTTA TRUST SOMEBODY. 
Vitalle rapped. TRUST? YER LOOKIN' AT EM, NICKY. BOTH OF EM.",
A COPPERS GOTTA BELIEVE DIFFERENT, I said, BELIEVE IN THE BLUE WALL OR TURN IN THE BADGE.
FINE, NICK Hricko keeps mumbling. ALL I CARE YOU CAN BELIEVE THE HOLY GHOST IS A '49 HUDSON ... BUT DRIVE A FORD.
I DRIVE A FORD, I said ... and Ben Hricko and Tony Vitalle promptly ordered doubles.
"*******************************  THE END  ***************************** ."