Today was my first day teaching high school Algebra. How do you spell HELL-- h-e-l-l. The kids weren't so bad. The comedy acts and the attitude should be expected from time to time. What was more depressing was what they represented-- the brink of adulthood. The moment when excitement seems to dissipate into the reality of the blah that is here and now. The teenage years seem to be a time where really, nothing is interesting, and everything is a crock of shit. I can't even listen to pop songs after today, because the lyrics seem too juvenile. I need to go for the more adult stuff like Arab Strap or Cat Power or even Yo La Tengo. Anything obscure enough to ensure that one of my students couldn't write the lyrics or sing along.
So several aspirin later...I'm again contemplating my options for the future. I imagine that my dream at sixteen wasn't so bad afterall-- to marry a rich British rock star and live between Europe and the U.S. Too bad the guys I was interested in are now recovering addicts or over the hill. Any young strappin' Brit boys out there with loads of money? Don't worry, I won't even be able to get
five quid off of you. Fish and chips maybe. A few pints, perhaps. "But in the end, it doesn't even maaaattttter...."