Welcome to the wonderful world of fine RedTelectronix Custom Effects! We here at RedTelectronix pride ourselves in producing the most desireable and hard to find effects on the planet.
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Just got a call for a last minute session, fill-in or jam call? Afraid your chops are not up to snuff?? Let RedTelectronix take your worries away with the incredible Talent Boost! Many users chain multiple Talent Boosts for unlimited talent.
Ever had one of those gigs where you are right in the middle of that dramatic solo and you break a string on your floating trem equipped guitar? Sure, we've all been there one time or another! The rest of the song is completely out of tune and YOU look like the moron.
Well ladies and gentlemen, thanks to RedTelectronix and the latest in pitch shifting technology, you no longer have to endure the heartbreak of mid solo broken string syndrome. The amazing Trem Tuna instantaneously senses an abrubt change in pitch and raises or lowers the the pitch of the remaining strings to perfect tune. Go ahead, break one, break two strings! We don't care! And neither will you with the RedTelectronix Trem Tuna in your effects chain!
Many consider the Trem Tuna to be the "Depends" undergarment equivalent for today's modern guitar player. You'll never have to wonder again.
Getting tired of the sterile, pure and pristine sound of your snobbish "true-bypass" effects? Don't you long for the days of sustain enhancing line noise and buffering? RedTelectronix to the rescue!!
Dontcha get tired of reading all those "How do I get the SRV tone" posts on the discussion boards? The Stevie Ray Vaughannabe should put an end to it all! No matter what you put in to it, SRV comes out the other end. Many users have sworn they felt Stevies presence in the room while using this pedal. A must for any pseudo blues player. Black hat and cowboy boots optional. A special thanks goes out to Phatrick, Rudeboy and Tele-Bob of the FDP for ideas and suggestions on this one!
I've had several requests for a heavy distortion type pedal and here it is! That's right folks, the Corn Biscuit Plus allows you to acquire those near subsonic heavily garbled "Going to H-E-Double Hockey Sticks" tones. Thanks to our patented MegaStortion circuitry, you can sound just like your favorite backwards ball cap wearing 7 string rock idol, regardless of guitar or amp. Of course, you must provide your own ball cap, gigantic shorts, bad haircut, profanity and stern looks. A special thanks goes out to SPAZZ of FDP fame for inspiration on the Corn Biscuit Plus!
Want to stand out in in today's world of sterilized tone, noise gates, "noise-free" pickups and "cymbal drop" tested guitar cables? Then the 60 Cycle Hum Boost is for you! Now with internal 50 Cycle Hum Boost DIP switch for our European brothers and sisters!
Only through the cutting edge technology made available by RedTelectronix can you relive those days of those crackling coiled 20 foot cords, 60 cycle hum and shorted out tubes and caps at the tap of your foot!
A special thanks goes out to "Al" (you know who you are, and so does the FBI) for suggesting this gem of an idea. Did you ever notice how that pesky sustain seems to get in the way of everything? Especially those all-important lead breaks? Kiss those days goodbye forever with the RedTelectronix Sustain Drain!!
Here's another "must have", courtesy of Eldon from the TDPRI. You know those situations where you find yourself with a player of profound ego but laughable talent? You know, the one who is three times louder than the rest of the band? Now you can wash your troubles down the drain with RedTelectronix Ego Compresser!
RedTelectronix is proud to announce its new distribution partnership with geniuses Dave & Randy, providers of the mind boggling Shredder Oil!
Following is the note I received from my new partners;
We were cleaning out an old file cabinet and we happened upon a can of Shredder Oil. Well, of course we took some home, applied it to the necks of our Les Paul and PRS guitars, and son-of-a-gun, we now play like EVH and every other "Shredder" we've ever heard of. Now we could have kept this our little secret weapon, but since we're cool guys, we opted to share this gem with the world. Given that you supply all the "totally cool" guitar effects that anyone would ever need, we hoped you could be the Shredder Oil messiah and get the word out. Hell, you could throw in a bottle with every box you sell. Such a deal!"
Dave & Randy
Chris Kinman of Kinman Pickups submitted this product idea for the dark and mysterious ways of the often rumored, but seldom seen, "Snake Oil".
Previously, Snake Oil has only been available to the most wealthy and elite of boutique pedal builders, amp builders, pickup gurus, NAMM representatives, and Guitar Center sales personnel.
Throughout history, Snake Oil has been an effective tool for door-to-door salesmen of years gone by, used car dealers, lawyers and Government Officals.
As musicians, we are all aware of it's otherworldly powers. Through the genius of Chris Kinman, and in partnership with RedTelectronix Custom Effects, this highly sought after product can be yours for the bargain price of $2,959.05, shipping included. One bottle lasts a lifetime!
Just imagine, no more rusted and broken strings, shorted cords, blown fuses and amp blowouts (when applied properly). I have even heard reports of people dabbing a bit of the oil on thier 1/4" input plugs converting inexpensive stompers and transistor amps that now rival all the major boutique makers.
You may have heard of Chris's fine line of pickups already, NOW you know how they sound sooo good. It's truly amazing! You can't afford to miss this offer!.
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