Thoughts and Jokes

Ever felt like this?

FuCk JVC!!! i had a JVC CD-RW 4X4X24 for about 1 1/2 months and it is fucked! i didn't do it, it just started not reading cd's. You know what i'm gonna do? I'm gonna go right up to the head guy at JVC and say, "Eh' buddy, hows aboot givin' me a new peice of shit to use, BITCH!" and he'll respect my athority...


A lady and her young son were walking around the mall when they met a man who was extremely bow-legged. The little boy thought this was funny and tugged on his mother's pants leg and said, "Look ....look at that bow-legged man. Isn't he the bow-leggiest man you ever saw?"

The mother was not too pleased with his making fun of someone and said, You are being very rude. It is very inconsiderate to laugh at someone and for your punishment you will have to study Shakespeare when we get home."

For the next three days the little boy read Shakespeare and finally his mother thought he had learned his lesson, so she took him shopping again at the Mall. After an hour or so, they saw another bow-legged man, and the little boy said, "Look!", but then he remembered what he had been punished for and immediately said:

"Lo, what manner of men are these, that wear their balls in parenthesis


CFCs and the Hole in the Ozone:
So you think you are all smart like the scientists eh? well guess what, i am smarter than your bitch ass! You all think thhat that huge gap in the the Ozone was made along time ago by the millions of products, like hairspray, which contained CFCs as a propellant for the hairspray and so on.. but after years of research i have found that is it actually the combination of cigerett smoke and gym socks! yes it's true! they have cut the production of CFCs and Freon but the gym socks and cigerett smoke are still the most profound threat to our health! No shit.....


Don't follow Lemmings!!!!! Lemmings are trying to kill you! they have "Spleen Rays" which make humans follow then, and the leader of this pack of covert murders has the ability to make humans into lemmings so when they walf off the clifs, it appears that they are lemmings, and not social workers.


All new interns will have to implanted with an Anti-Clinton chip that prevents them from having any "Sexual-Relationships" with the leader of the United States. Unfortunally a HUGE flaw has been discovered... a large "ON" "OFF" swich is clearly visible.


Midgets, not genetics
I have formed a theory that midgets are not a fault in a person's genes, but a process I call "Spontaneous Shrinkage". This happens because there is a misbalance in chemicals in the person's body, and just like Spontaneous Explosion, Spontaneous Shrinkage happens anytime and it is unexpected. There are no warning signs and no aliments. I mean I say a 6'9" guy walking along then, BLAM! 3'5"!


If anyone objects or is mentally fucked up by my site or thinks their minority has been discriminated against, FUCK YOU! I have the freedom of speech and it is all done in humor. Oh, have you had you're first Fuck You of the Millennium? If you haven't, here it is officially:

FUCK YOU!!!