REASONS WHY CARRIE SHOULD DUMP AUSTIN
1. He isnt Mike Horton
2. He makes dumb look smart
3. He looks like an ape
4. He cant find a clue
5. He has beyond disgusting belly-button hair
6. He cant grow a proper beard
7. He is secretly gay and is planning on running away with Stefano
8. He has a butt cleft on his chin
9. He has forgotten how to play the piano
10. He cant talk in full sentences
11. He says "duh" in every sentence
12. He kisses Samis lying ass
13. He is braindead and a himbo
14. He stares blankly all the time
15. He mistook Sami for Carrie (cmon on)
16. He is a mommys boy
17. Maybe Kate would leave Carrie alone
18. Sami would finally shut up and leave Carrie alone
19. She wouldnt have to live with the fear of miniature Austins
20. Mike is smarter, better-looking, successful and crazy about her
Back to austin bashing page
