Colin struggled against the pull of the water, feeling his legs tangle beneath him as the Chevy was sucked into the mud and silt below him. He willed his arms to move, his wounded hands and knees stinging as he swam against the tow, fighting his way to shore. He grabbed the nearby reeds, using them to pull himself up on to the banks of the pond. Slumping against the mud walls, his lungs gasping for breath, Colin lay there, his eyes closed as he felt the adrenhalin draining from his body.
Shivering, Colin forced himself to his knees, wincing as weight was put on his legs, which had only moments before been pinned under the dashboard of his car. He growled against his shaking limbs as he pushed himself over the embankment, and then he suddenly found himself rolling uncontrollable down the other side. He landed with a groan in a soft stretch of grass next to the road.
He lay there for what seemed like a long time, feeling his heart pounding wildly within his chest, his hands shaking as his body went into shock. Staring up at the sky, he observed the grayness of the approaching clouds and thought to himself that it didn't matter if it rained anytime soon, he was already soaking wet. He shivered again, his chest muscles clenching painfully as he began coughing. He rolled over onto his side, his body spasming as he was racked with pain.
Curled in the fetal position, Colin missed the screech of tires and the cloud of dust that erupted as a truck pulled up at the side of the road.
"Colin!?!?" He felt a gentle hand touch his skin; it felt hot and he welcomed it's warmth against his cold flesh. "God... Colin, what happened!?" He groaned, rolling onto his back. His eyes opened slowly, feeling heavy and sticky, blinking as they tried to focus on the voice that was attached to the hand.
"'Chelle..." He moaned under his breath. A hand touched his forehead, wiping at his eyes.
"You're bleeding something awful, Colin... Hold on a second, I'll be right back." The warmth disappeared, and Colin reached for it blindly, sighing softly when it return.
"Hold still, Colin... just let me clean you up a bit." A something soft was draped over him and a hand dabbed gently at his forehead with a cool cloth, wiping around his eyes again.
The voice gasped, "What happened, Colin. Look at you! Your forehead... your hand!" A hand grabbed his left wrist, forcing him to press his hand against his own forehead. "Hold that there!" The voice was stern and Colin obeyed. A cloth was wrapped around his right hand, causing Colin to hiss as it was tightened and secured.
"I'm going to get you back to the Crowe's Nest. We'll have Syrena or one of the guys fix you up... and Chelle'll take care of you."
"Chelle..." Colin moaned, suddenly pushing the hand away. "No...."
"Colin, stop it... I have to get you back to the Crowe's Nest..." There was another gasp... "Shit! Your leg too, Colin... what the heck were you doing?"
"No!!" Colin sat up suddenly, pushing hard against the hands that held him. But they fought back against him, holding him down.
"COLIN!! STOP IT! You're in shock.... It's me! Loria!" The soft hands held his face, forcing him to look at her.
"Loria?" He blinked, feeling suddenly heavy, his mind whirling.
"Whoa there..." Loria rested her hand behind his head as she eased him back, encouraging him to lie back down. He went reluctantly, mumbling under his breath, but he let her go about her business.
She pulled another clean rag from her backpack and wrapped it carefully around Colin's bloody knee.
"My car..." Colin moaned, turning his head towards the pond.
"Yes Colin, your car... your beautiful car..." Loria muttered as she fastened the rag with a knot.
"My car..." Colin frowned, lifting his head.
"Lay back, Colin." Loria pushed his head back, quickly doublechecking the rag before pressing it firmly against his forehead, causing him to wince. "Your car... it's at the bottom of the pond. Do you mind explaining to me how it got there?!"
"It was an accident...."
"I'll say! God... Colin... you... you could have been killed!"
"I'm fine..." Colin spoke gruffly, even as he felt his body being overwhelmed with pain.
"You're bleedy and you could have drowned!" Loria leaned back on her haunches, glaring at Colin. "Now can you walk, or am I going to have to carry you back to the truck?"
"I'll walk..." Colin winced as he propped himself up on his right elbow, cradling his wounded hand against his stomach. Loria reached for the rag on his forehead, brushing aside his hand. She dabbed at the cut there, wetting a corner of the rag with saliva before attempted to clean it gently.
"You're going to need a few stitches... especially in that hand of yours...you've got some deep cuts there." She secured an arm around his waist and gripped his left hand, helping him slowly to his feet. Colin leaned against her, limping and swaying as they took the few short strides to the truck.
Syrena's nerves tingled at the feeling of his calloused fingers against her skin, and she swung their hands together trying to allay her emotions. "Thanks for breakfast," she said quietly, turning to face him as they walked.
"No worries, love," he smiled at her, the corners of his eyes wrinkling slightly.
"So did you happen to grab the key on your way out?"
He grinned mischieviously, raising his eyebrows, "Oh, was I supposed to?" She cocked her head and raised one eyebrow, smiling curiously. "Yeah, Sy, I brought the key."
"Great." They continued walking up the slight incline to the hotel, her hand still clutched in his, and she realized that she was almost truely happy. Happiness had been such a fleeting feeling in the past few years, she'd begun to think that it was gone forever, but here, walking hand in hand with Hando, feeling cared for and important, she was surprised to feel the lost emotion. She sighed heavily, keeping her eyes focussed on the walkway before her, trying to remind herself that the situation was only temporary, that things would go back to the way they were.
"You okay, hon?" Hando squeezed her hand gently and slowed their pace, pulling her toward him.
"Yeah, I'm fine, Hando. Perfectly fine," she replied, resisting the tension, attempting to maintain her pace. "I'm just thinking about things... the past mostly, a bit of the future... life in general, I guess."
He stopped and held her there, drawing her toward him with a gentle tug on her hand and turning her to face him. He brushed an errant tress of hair out of her face, tucking it tenderly behind her ear and leaving his hand there, running his fingers down her neck and looking deep into her eyes. Dropping his voice to a mere whisper, he stated, "All life is present; the past is gone, the future is unseen. The future starts now, love." His breath brushed her cheek, and he bowed his head to press his lips against the pulse point at the base of her throat.
She took a deep breath and let it out slowly, closing her eyes for a moment and almost succumbing to the sensation before remembering that they were standing in the middle of the pathway and pushing him back. His eyes had darkened with arousal, and he ran his tongue deliberately across his lips. Syrena pressed her fingers to his lips, "You're right, hon, but we need to understand the past before we can decide the paths of the future. Without understanding the past, we'll fall back into the same abyss over and over again, and I don't want to see that happen. Do you?"
He lowered his eyes and shook his head, "No. But I want to forget... I..."
"Hando, your past is a part of you as much as mine is a part of me. If I forgot my past, I wouldn't be the same person you see here. Remember, 'A man can't lose the past nor the future, for how can you take from him that which is not his?' You can't change it, you can't get rid of it, it's a part of you, but it's not yours. My past... well, it's been hell, but I'd like to think I learned from it. Can you say that about yours?" He closed his eyes and nodded hesitantly, unsure of the truth of his response. Syrena smiled and ran her hand over his head, "You can learn from your past, Hando, but you've got to remember it to see the lessons it has to offer." With her hand on the back on his head, she pulled him to her and kissed him gently on the forehead. "Now come on, let's go get a sack lunch and spend the day remembering what our past has to show us."
She tightened her grip on his hand and turned to continue up the path to the hotel; Hando allowed himself to be led for a moment before picking up his pace to walk beside her. Together, their fingers still interlaced, they entered the lobby of the hotel and stopped momentarily at the front desk. "Morning, Peaches," Syrena grinned broadly. "Um... have you got any messages for me? Any news on 'chelle?"
"Hi there, Sy. Last I heard she was doing fine, resting. Other than that, no messages."
"That's good to hear, on both accounts there. If you guys need me for anything today, I think I'll be at the west beach, just so ya know."
Peaches smiled and thanked her. "Thank you, Peaches. I'll catch ya later," Syrena nodded in farewell and continued with Hando to gather her pack from her room in preparation for the day ahead. Turning to Hando as they climbed the stairs, she asked, "Is there anything you need to bring along for the day?"
"Nope, hon, I'll be just fine."
"Right, well I'll just grab my pack and kit, and we'll see about getting some kinda picnic or something to take along. Sound like a plan?" Hando acquiesced smiling expansively and handed her the key. He waited by the door as she gathered her first-aid kit, stowed it in her pack and slung the pack over her shoulders. He started to step forward to help knowing how heavy the pack was, but she waved him back. "I've got it perfectly balanced, Hando. Believe me, it's not as heavy once it's on--years of experience packing," she grinned, leading the way back down the stairs to her truck waiting in the parking lot.
An hour later the couple had showered, changed clothes, then made their way to the hotel restaurant. Being the brief slow time between breakfast and lunch, it was nearly empty with the exception of the employees, Andy, and Arthur Baskin, both of whom were sharing a table, and finishing their cups of coffee or tea and sweet rolls. The two young men acknowledged John and Tina as they passed, and no one missed Andy excitedly saying how pretty Tina looked with her straw curls and how happy the companions appeared.
"Aren't they sweet together, Arthur?" he said. "You can tell how much John likes Tina, and how much she likes him, can't you?" Baskin only ducked his head in reply, blushing profusely.
Rick was cleaning one table as the couple approached. "Morning Tina, John. Well, afternoon anyway. How are you two doing?"
"Fine Rick," John answered, and Tina told him she was all right as well. "How are you?"
"Doing okay, especially after everything that went down last night." The two nodded. "I was glad to see morning show up myself."
"I know what you mean," Tina replied. "Peaches told us that 'Chelle is doing better though, thank God." The waiter nodded, saying he had heard the same news.
John spoke next. "Rick, I know it's almost lunchtime, but do you have a table..."
"Sure thing, John. Anything for you and Tina. I just finished setting that one." He nodded at one off near a quiet corner. "Is it okay or would you prefer..."
"That'll work, Rick, thanks. Tina darlin'?"
"Works for me."
Lightly placing a hand on her back, he escorted her to the table, enjoying even the slightest touch of her. Andy - observant as always - was right: the straw curls were pretty; her jeans and the fit of her rose colored sweater flattered her, thrusting her full breasts upward in an enticing fashion. And yes, John considered as he pulled out the chair for her, he liked her - he *more* than liked her.
"Okay...would you like the breakfast or lunch menu?" Rick asked, grinning. "You're in time for either at this point. Andy and Arthur just had breakfast themselves."
Tina shrugged. "I've been thinking about this the whole time. Decisions, decisions. What do I want? I...guess...I'd like the breakfast. It's not that late yet."
"Yeah, me too, Rick. Breakfast menu."
"Great. Want to go ahead and order your drinks now, too?....Tina, I know you like orange juice and the Starbucks Breakfast Light Blend with half-and-half normally."
"Still do. Let's go with that." She loved this type of service.
"John, you want your usual black coffee and orange-pineapple juice?"
"Absolutely."
"Be right back." He returned moments later, leaving their drinks and the menus with them, promising he would give them enough time to get their orders together. John and Tina laughed and discussed several choices, but at one moment, they quieted, their hands briefly touching when they reached for the same water glass. The sheriff's fingertips brushed the back of her right hand as he gazed at the pale rose polish on her nails.
"I love that color," he whispered, watching her blush the same color. Geez he was starving, not just for food, but for her again.
"I know. That's why I picked it." She cleared her throat. "Okay...concentrate."
"Right, concentrate." He just hoped his privates thought the same. "What are you getting?"
"Mmm...I'm going with the Healthy Selections Lite menu. Low fat bacon; fat free blueberry muffin; fresh fruit cup; all white omelet; whole wheat toast."
"Sounds good. I'll go with that, too."
"John you don't have to. I'm just still on my mainly fat free..."
"Nah, I like how it sounds, and I've seen you eat it before. Besides, I'll catch up with my fat content later for lunch and dinner." Tina laughed, as did he. "Seriously, it sounds good, darlin'. I can pass on my pancakes and waffles for one day." She nodded, smiling, saying she just didn't want him to feel obligated, but it was nice he was so thoughtful....
Forty-five minutes later, they were both partially done with their meals and deciding how they would spend what was left of the day.
"I don't think we've ever been up in that area before," John was saying as Tina ate the last of her muffin. He used the edge of a slice of toast to push what remained of his eggs and bacon. "Give you a little bit of an idea of what it'll be like when we go camping."
"You're just anxious to get me into the wilderness, aren't you?" Tina joked.
"I didn't say wilderness, darlin'. Wilderness. You make it sound like Moses and the Israelites or something." They both laughed. "Aw man...those Healthy Selections were fantastic. I could eat another one."
"I'll bet you could, but remember, it won't be but a few hours before we have lunch. Think I'll go with a salad; then we can have something more for dinner." They smiled and said almost simultaneously, "Ribs," then started laughing again. "I've been a good girl the last few weeks. I can splurge a bit...And how did you know I was thinking..."
"Ribs?" He shrugged. "We haven't had any in forever. Just thought that would be a nice change."
Tina glanced towards the entrance, catching the eye of Jeff Mitchell as he came in. Both she and Biebe then waved at him before he strolled over to Rick. "You thought good." She took a final sip of the few drops of orange juice. "Now back to the wilderness."
The Alaskan chuckled, rolling his eyes. "Look, let's just drive around up there, get a feel for it. We'll drive some of the terrain the Sebring can take - let you have a good look. I mean, when we do seriously go, I'll pick an easy spot since you're a beginner. I wouldn't make you climb mountains and stuff our first time out...And the place I'm thinking about is sort of like that English countryside you loved." He watched her eyes gleam. "We wouldn't have to hike but a mile or two to this place I'm considering."
"I can do that. I walked 1-1/4 miles from the rail station to Hever Castle, and that was hitting flat roads and inclines. It was exhilarating."
"See, this will be pretty much the same. I wouldn't have us hit something difficult your first time out."
"I appreciate that, Sheriff. I think I can deal with a route like that."
"Something easy to break you in, darlin'. Hey, have you ever been rock climbing?"
She shook her head. "Always wanted to. Looks like fun."
"We've got a set-up over at the fitness center. You ought to let me teach you if you're interested."
"I'd love to. Guess you've done some climbing in your day, eh?"
He chuckled. "Yeah, I have. More than I care to admit. But no, we'll find a nice site overlooking one of the valleys or gorges so we can get a great view of the sunsets." Tina smiled softly. "Just a nice weekend together. Maybe even get some fishing in? Leave on a Thursday; come back by Sunday evening."
"I'll start working on it; see when I can get time off again. You know," she paused to complete her coffee, "I'm actually looking forward to it."
"Told ya, sweetheart."
"Just promise me one thing."
His eyebrows raised. "Anything...you know that," he said sincerely.
"If we start finding mysterious rocks stacked outside our tent, or see little stick figures hanging in the trees..." she teased, and Biebe laughed uproariously, "...can we leave? Before the Blair Witch or something worst lures us to that empty house and down to the basement?"
"Or we run into three bad actors with a camcorder?" Now it was Tina's turn to laugh. "We'll leave. I promise, especially if it's the three bad actors with the video cameras. I wouldn't make anyone suffer with that."
"Thank you," she replied, bowing her head in appreciation. She leaned forward, about to discreetly kiss him on the cheek, when her joyful expression suddenly fell as she glimpsed the main entrance.
At the back of the Tavern, Arthur sifted through the piles of paperwork on his desk, shaking his head as he glanced at some of the recent financial spending.
Liz passed by the doorway, looking in. "How are the figures, Arthur?" She giggled when she saw the strained expression on his face. "That bad, huh?"
Arthur waved his arms, tossing the papers to the desk and opening the blue ledger book. "This is outrageous, Elizabeth! Seven thousand dollars in one night on beers and peanuts. And then there is Annabella's receipt from the grocer's last week. She still hasn't explained the extra flour and eggs and whatever else that never made it to the pantry."
"Relax Arthur, you know it always works out just fine." Liz smiled in reassurance. "Listen... I've got to step out for a bit, before the lunch rush hits. Andy's taken over the bar and Annabella and Rick are working on the lunch menu... and things are pretty quiet right now. Just keep an ear out for the phone, okay? I should be back in about 45 minutes."
Arthur nodded without looking up from his seat and Liz disappeared down the hall. With a frown he started entering in the daily figures into the ledger book.
"Stay with me, Colin." Loria patted his arm, trying to keep him awake. Her fingers touching his skin, she noticed immediately the coolness of him. She glanced at his face. His head lolled back against the headrest and sweat beaded on his forehead and mixed with the blood the dripped from his split eyebrow. He moaned, brushing aside her hand with a shaky hand, sending a smear of blood down his arm. "Colin..." She gripped his arm, shaking him roughly. "You've got to stay awake, you're going into shock.... We'll get you back to the Tavern and someone can have a look at you... Stay with me, Colin.
Colin blinked, his eyes feeling terribly heavy. He grunted, his head nodding as he tried to focus on the road ahead, but the furious rate at which everything was passing by the window, made him feel dizzy. He clenched his teeth as he felt his stomach wretch.
"We're almost there, Colin... just a few more minutes. Hold on, hon.
Hando eyed the white pickup with the tall lift-back canopy as Syrena unclipped a heavy keychain from her belt loop and raised the canopy door. The truck was white underneath a healthy coat of mud sprays and dust, and the heavy-duty tires spoke of off-road abilities. She hefted the pack over the tailgate to set it gently inside the bed. "Nice place you've got here," he commented, noting the dark curtains on the canopy windows and the mattress stacked with pillows. A kerosene lantern hung from a wire strung across the span of the truck, swaying slightly from side to side with the movement, and a stack of well-worn paperback books rested in the corner.
"Yeah, it is, isn't it? Never far from home, here," Syrena grinned and latched the canopy door. She sighed deeply, running her fingers through her hair as her headache threatened to return, and turned to lean against the bumper. Hando looked at her with questioning eyes, and she waved him off. "Why don't you grab the food, eh? I'll just wait here." They decided quickly on a list of picnic supplies, and Hando sauntered back toward the hotel restaurant to fill the order. She smiled as she watched him go, glad to see some of his old confidence creeping back into his step. He disappeared through the swinging door of the restaurant, and she climbed into the cab to wait. The album in the CD player was one of her collection that required high volume, so she turned it up whilst waiting, leaning her head back against the headrest and closing her eyes to appreciate the full force of Manifest Vision.
* * * * * *
Jeff was leaning against the counter talking softly to Rick when Hando entered the restaurant. They both looked up and stepped away from each other slightly before Jeff spoke hesitantly. "G'day, Hando."
Hando stopped near the counter and looked at the two of them, curling his lip almost imperceptibly out of long-ingrained habit before his brain kicked in, and he greeted them. "G'day, Jeff, Rick," he nodded to each of them in turn. "I... ah..." Words failed him, and he picked up a menu, opening it and staring at it intently, trying to overcome the hatred that sat heavily in his gut.
Jeff glanced at Rick surreptitiously then back to Hando's intimidating form before him. He could see the bandages on Hando's wrists, and he smiled engagingly. "Feeling better this morning, Hando?"
Hando looked up, surprised that Jeff was addressing him directly, and swallowed the bile in his throat. "Yeah, thanks to Sy," he replied and found himself smiling in return.
"I'm glad to hear it, mate. I wasn't there, but I heard we almost lost ya there."
Hando nodded, feeling the knot in his stomach begin to subside. He set the menu down on the counter and glanced inquiringly at Rick.
"What can I get for ya, Hando?" Rick's voice was less confident than Jeff's, and he didn't make eye contact. Hando picked up the menu again and, leaning over the counter, listed the items Syrena and he had decided on. "Coming right up, Hando. Back in a tick," Rick acknowledged the order and headed off to the kitchen.
Jeff watched Rick go and knew that it would take a while for him to regain his composure after the encounter with Hando. He turned to Hando and flashed another grin, "Would you like a drink, mate? I was just going to grab a Coke. Have a seat," he gestured toward the line of stools at the counter and retrieved two cold glasses of Coke before coming to take a stool beside Hando. "So Syrena's been helping you out, hey?"
"Yeah, when noone else really cared," his voice bespoke the resentment he felt at this knowledge.
"Well, you've got to admit, Hando, you've been kinda hard to get to know."
Hando chuckled softly under his breath and nodded silently, watching the bubbles rise in the dark liquid before him. He ran his hand unconsciously over his shaved head, trying to shun thoughts about his past, about Gabe and little Babs, about Davey and his betrayal. Sighing deeply, he took a long drink and leaned on the counter, still not looking at Jeff beside him.
The weight of a hand on his shoulder brought him back to the present. "Hey, mate, you alright?" Jeff leaned down and peered at him with an expression of concern.
Hando sat up and turned to face Jeff. "Yeah, fine," his voice had taken on a forlorn tone underneath its deep timbre. "I have been a bit... um... antisocial. I...," his words trailed off as Rick returned with a stack of take out boxes.
Rick smiled at Jeff, obviously relieved to find the two of them still in one piece and chatting quietly. "Here you are, Hando. Is this on your tab?"
"Yeah, beauty. Thanks, Rick." He stood up and reached to take the boxes but thought otherwise. Turning to face Jeff he smiled and extended his hand. "Thanks, mate," he offered congenially.
Jeff took his hand and shook it heartily, returning the smile and dismissing the gratitude, "No worries, mate. Have a good day, and give my love to Sy, will ya?"
Hando nodded in acquiescence, turned to gather the take-out boxes and strode out of the restaurant toward Syrena waiting in the truck. His step had a spring to it that wasn't there before, and he felt some of his old hatred fading away bit by bit. Is this what I've been missing? he asked himself again, gazing at the sparsely clouded blue sky. He frowned to himself, trying to admit to his past that he felt more welcome today than he'd felt in the years he'd been at the Nest, then found himself smiling by the time he reached the truck. Syrena didn't hear him approach, and as he neared the truck he knew why--the heavy electronic sounds echoed in the air, and he could see her leaning back against the headrest nodding her head in time to the beat. A single lyric was repeated over and over in the song, and his mind registered the words: "Each of us hides a secret pain. Share yours with me and gain strength from the sharing." Sighing heavily, he opened the passenger door and placed the boxes of food on the bench seat beside Syrena before climbing in himself.
She grinned at him and reached to turn down the volume, "Sorry 'bout that, hon. Sometimes I get carried away with this song. So you got everything then?"
"Yep, let's go."
"Right," Syrena threw the truck into gear, and they pulled out of the parking lot heading west.
John watched even closer as Jeff and Hando continued to talk. There were no raised voices. In fact the scene was deceptively calm, and the sheriff could only stare in astonishment. He glanced at Tina - saw that she remained very still, studying the situation in quiet amazement, her eyes wide. Her companion placed a hand lightly on top of one of hers, and she looked briefly at him, unspeaking, fear beginning to etch her features.
Minutes later, Rick returned carrying a number of boxes, which were then handed to Hando. He could be heard to thank them, and - without a single negative comment - walked out, likely to join Syrena. Only when he had disappeared did Jeff and Rick sigh loudly, then nervously laugh. Tina, however, continued to stare towards the vestibule, afraid Hando might return.
"Sweetheart?" John whispered. No response. "Sweetheart" he repeated a bit louder and she jumped slightly, looking at him.
"Huh?" she muttered, shaking her head to come to her senses.
"It's all right, darlin'." She nodded in response, emptily looking down at her plate, then back to John, who noticed the expression of near panic in her eyes. "It's okay. I don't even think he saw us. Too engrossed with other things."
"Uh-huh," she whispered, picking up a glass of water so as to take some ice chunks in her mouth. She crunched those so nervously, John wondered if she'd bite her tongue.
Rick slowly returned to their table, still looking as if he had experienced an Epiphany. The sheriff watched for a moment, and then spoke. "Rick?" The waiter glanced up, barely stopping in his table clearing. "You and Jeff all right?"
The younger man appeared baffled at first. "We...I...That is we thought..." He sighed. "I...I...I don't know, John, I just...don't...That was too...freaking...weird. I mean...too weird."
"What did he say?"
"He...You know John, that's the odd thing. He...He behaved like a real, normal person. I mean, he's had derogatory things to say in the past, to my and Jeff's faces. It never mattered, but this time...it was like he was going out of his way to be...nice."
"What did he do? Place an order?"
Rick laughed uneasily. "Yeah, can you imagine that? Looked like Syrena's handwriting, but it was a lunch order. Guess the two of them are going on a picnic. Just when I think I've seen- Hey, I'm sorry. Would you two like anything else? Tina? John?"
"No more for me, thanks." John turned to his companion, her face still filled with puzzlement. "How about you, darlin'? Wanta warm your cup, or..."
"No, I'm...I'm fine," she quietly responded, managing a smile. "Thanks anyway, Rick."
As the waiter finished clearing the table, and John pulled out her chair for her, Tina tried to concentrate on the sheriff's words. He was being lighthearted again, discussing their proposed drive into the country, and she smiled and nodded, looking forward to spending more time with him. She had fallen in love with mountains during her visit to Denver in '99, and while she didn't have the passion for them that she did water or British countrysides, their beauty and majesty still amazed her. She would welcome a change of scenery, seeing a place she had never been before. So why was it, despite all attempts to behave as if nothing had happened, her skin still crawled at the thought of Hando? And all she could imagine was her dream....
