COCKA FUCKIN DOODLE DOO!
Hello, I'm ZacK. Incase none of you know me, which you should; I am one of Mikes old friends from Virginia Beach. Now back in the day, well...about 3 years ago, when Mike actually had a life, we roamed the streets of "Ghetto Run" scaring little kids and disturbing senior citizens. Well more of a being a senior citizen then disturbing them, but I'll get back to that later. Lets see, he went to my Elementary School but I never really talked to him (geeky kid with huge ass classes and a mullet like haircut...hm...), so really I met him in Middle School. Yes, Larkspur Middle School, brand new and bigger than any West Virginian school around. Also known, as !!HELL!! we served our three year sentence there. Want to know how we survived? Constant stealing of soda from the SCA Office and experimenting new ways to hurt ourselves in the Auditorium. Anything illegal happening in that school you could almost count on us being involved and/or the creators of the whole damn thing. Now, getting off the subject of !!HELL!!. many things happened in our non-so-quiet suburban neighborhood of Green Run, also known as Ghetto Run. There were three people in our little group of Destruction; me, Mike, and Josh-the skinny Starvin' Marvin like white boy in which Mike had most of his battles with. I was the muscle of the group, what can I say, I'm a killer. Mike was the demented "philosopher", who came up with all our ideas, and Josh was the brains, who always put Mike's ideas into something we could actually do. In 1998 the ABWF was born. The Amateur Backyard Wrestling Federation was our means of keeping occupied when Goldeneye got a bit tiring. ABWF always took place at Mike's house, my parents would have beheaded me and Josh lived too far away. It was here where bloody noses were common, and near concussions were no big deal. A 6 inch thick mattress as our ring and pillows thrown on top of it was the only thing keeping us from the ground. Ladders, containers of all types, shovels, and boxes were our common weapons. Mike still has the original tape so if any of you want to see us looking like asses watch that. Towards the end of our time together we got a strange idea in our head. "Why don't we dress up like old people?" Mike said. "Why the hell not" I said. So we were on a mission. I grabbed up a straw hat, a flannel shirt, and some tight jeans, and a cane, and stuffed some pillows in my shirt, I was ready. Mike was the "lady" (he knows I wasn't going to be it), he picked up one of my sisters old dance hats (pink with little flowers), a purse, and two pairs of socks and shoved it in his shirt to recreate the "womanly figure". We hit the streets, dancing around and talking to all types of people. Although stupid and senseless, it was fun. Mike moved in October of 2000 I believe. Oh well, I dropped the stupid ass me and went back to tough, smartass ZacK. But Mike's impression on me is not completely gone, demented and insane I still am. So you want to mess with me? I'm one crazy mofo with hella combat training, 600+ weapons of all kinds, mostly guns, and one twisted mind. This concludes my introduction rant, NOW GO FUCK YOURSELF!
