Mood:  irritated
Now Playing: Theme to shindlers list
Topic: My day today
Well today was a decent day, although i found out that three people quit. One didnt show up, yes I am again talking about work. thats all i talk about almost. I am now doing a better job at work, so im happy about that.
Now on to the thing that has been vexing me for some time now. Christians whom think the sun rises and sets in George Bushs BUTT. So many of them try to get all philosophical with me and read deep hidden meanings into my decision to vote for John Kerry. There is none there people, I voted my consience. Sure I hate Kerry, he is for faggots and baby killers, but George bush is a lying stupid and plain bad president, so people get over it, stop trying to play DR Phil and just accept the fact that out of Bush and Kerry, Both whom I hate I voted for kerry. Live with it, if you cant then either make it where our election system changes or butt out of my buisness.
I go to two christian message boards, that is my first mistake, Christians are such back biting scum. Again , this is why i call myself a servant of Jesus and not a christian. Christian has become a tainted and perverted word much like pharasee or scribe. anyway, every post I make, people tries to find something to tear apart and make something bad out of it....First they said i am too judgmental, So I searched my heart and found they were right...NOW I dont judge people, but NOW they say I am too accepting and liberal, damned if I do , damned if I dont, again I say christians suck.
Then when I make a post about the meaning Christian is not the same as what it meant in the bible times , meaning when the bible was written, THEN they try to make it something political like well if there was fewer democrats the world would be a nicer place.....Im sure they think George Bush will get them into heaven as slick as Bush got out of going to Vietnam and getting off scot free for being awol while guarding texas from God knows what.
I am ordering a book on cassette called CRUCIFIED BY CHRISTIANS, My good buddy wayno mentioned it to me, so I think ill give it a shot....couldnt hurt.
So, the question comes up....AM I JADED....the answer is a big ole YES. a big honking yes. CHristians are leading more people to hell than any cult or false teacher could. With their judgementalism and attitude of GOD ONLY TALKS TO ME mindset I just wanna puke.
Well , i just want to get to bed cause i have to wake up extra early tomorrow cause Kim needs the car. Maybe a good shower , no, a nice warm bath with candles and some enya playing will rid this scourge of Politically correct selfrighteous christian hypocrites from my mind. I want more of Jesus, Less of todays quasi-religion.
Nite world.

Mood:  irritated
Now Playing: Null Factor.
Topic: The rage burning
I am so friggin upset today. I was having a good day untill the so called Christians ruined it. , Man I cant stand christians. I am of course not talking about Servants of Jesus, They are real. Christians on the other hand do nothing but judge me with their self righteousness, Their Ivy covered arches hold steel doors meant to keep the servants out. So pious. To hell with them.
Satan knows where to hit a man, he uses those closest to him or his SUPPOSED peers to bring him down.....I dont care any more. I am who I am, I fear no one save Jesus and God the Father. I dont care what those self righteous soul suckers say about me. I wish them wisdom enough to look in the mirror. At themselves , the very thing that they hate most.
Well I just feel the Solitude coming on again, the desire to just be in a dark room by myself, to shut out all of the outside world , just me and Jesus, no one else....There are a few exceptions to this....Sarath today, in his wisdom treated me like a human being. He is such a wise man that has done things that others only dream of, but in his humility lifted me and my worthless life up until I felt like I was just as good as him.
Then there is my buddy Paul, He lives in Ohio, he is a young man, but so wise and caring. Man, These are good folk. '
I wish Wayno was here to talk to, but he said he might get rid of ICQ, the program I use to chat with him with...Wayno is one of my oldest buds on the internet. He is a good man, kindof strange at times but one of the most loyal and trustworthy people I know.
Anyway, in closing i want to say, if you feel the need to judge me...DIE, SLOWLY AND PAINFULLY, OR SAY YOUR PEICE TO MY FACE, dont hide behind the safety of the computer...If you want to judge me a sinner, Ill beat your ass like a sinner. Then you can be justified before the God you dont know yet.

my day
Mood:  a-ok
Now Playing: Paganini Violin sonata number six
Topic: My day today
Well I have not posted anything for a few days. I guess life has just been too bizzy for me to get on here and do anything. BUT..Today went well. I voted for my first time today. I felt the need to at least partially make a change or have part in a possible change for my great country. Most Christians vote for Bush like he is some manner of a saviour or something. I am a follower of Jesus and I dont think Bush OR Kerry will do anything remarkable. Both are lyers and politicians, which is one in the same. BUT I went outside of what most ignorant christians do and I voted for John Kerry. First let me say, Kerry is an immoral man and not one that will do anything moral for America. He is pro-abortion and gives many rights to faggots. Homosexuallity and abortion are both horrible and disgusting things. They are unspeakable. I HATE THE SIN, but I must love the sinner. Because I tollerate things DOES NOT mean I endorse them. With that being said here is my reasons why I voted for John Kerry.:
First, Kerry has a plan about the war with Iraq. How to let the Irqies take care of themselves. He admits there is a need for war, BUT not against Iraq. He believes like I do that our prime target is Osama BinLauden and he should be executed with extreme prejudice by any means we have. Him and all like him. Let Iraq worry about themselves. Kerry has a plan to stop the war, Bush is spouting hold the course and he dont even know what the course is.
Kerry also fought in war. He went to Nam and fought and was decorated and wounded three times. Bush pulled strings through his dad to get a cushie job guarding Texas , most of which time he was AWOL. Bush also is taking good American jobs, sending them overseas where labour is cheap then shipping the stuff back here TAX FREE and charging us up the wazzoo for it. Bush LIED about the reasons for going to Iraq. FIRST it was Weapons of mass destruction....When that lie was found out, it was to Get Osama...when that lie was seen through and he let osama walk free, he lied again by saying the reason we are there is to free Iraq...they dont want freed, they wanna serve a false deity called ALLAH , which by the way I urinate in ALLAHS BEARD. Next Bush is sending money to help the very people that we are fighting....Bush never mentions Osama because I honestly believe he is somehow connected and in legue with him. Sure Bush is anti abortion, thats good. But abortion is still legal and Bush has not stopped it. Bush is anti gay...But he dont make their perversion illegal, Bush is NOT a saviour, Neither is Kerry....But Bush is aborting soldiers at an alarming rate when he was himself afraid to go and fight. HOLD THE CORSE....He dont have a course. He is just a lyer and a worthless man who took our countries surplus budget and turned it into a deficit in record time . Carter worked four years for the friendship of other countries, Bush destroyed it in a matter of months making us the most hated nation in the world.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Ok, now on to other things. I am still loving work. I enjoy the friendship of all the folks there. I got my raise. Hopefully my new position will come into effect soon as i have been being trained there for a few days.
Been talking to my goth bud Jaime. He is such a cool dude..He has many of the traits I wish I had such as kindness, gentleness and caring. I dont have these qualities in abundance. I have two days off, I want to spend them in prayer and in the Word of God....I hope I can accomplish this...
I am at the moment talking to my good buddy Wayno and Jess. Wayno is , well I told you about wayno in other posts...hes just way cool. Jess is a good and trusted freind. I can talk to her about stuff and she dont get mad or judge me....a good friend indeed.
Well, Im into my dark mood again...Its so peacefull.I switched my online name again from the Metalvikng one to the Dweller Unseen one. I have two names I use online. Dweller Unseen and metalvikng. Metalvikng is the one for the rougher and more in your face side of me, Dweller is for the calm man who becomes shaddow and melts into the darkness and just lets the world do as it wishes.
Enough for tonight.

Wise words to promote fellowship between believers
Mood:  irritated
Now Playing: Nothing
Topic: Wisdom from Sarath
I have a good friend at work, you have heard memention him before. His name is Don, but his real name is Sarath. I cannot pronounce or even begin to write his last name. He is from Shri Lanka.
We was talking today at work. He asked me what it was that I didnt like about those calling themselves Christians today....I told him it is because all they want to do is Judge and Point fingers and act self righteous. I then told him that I wish people could be more like him and NOT JUDGE. He got a puzzled look on his face and said "Jim, I do judge, all men judges". He proceeded to say "But it is WHAT we judge that makes a difference, If what you have in you is GOOD and Pure, then you will JUDGE that which is GOOD AND PURE in OTHERS." This completely amazed me, I told him so, to which he replied and smiled " Its all so simple". What else could be said with logic like that? This man is not even a follower of Jesus, BUT he had summed up one of the greatest fundamental truths of the bible. I count myself very fortunate to know someone like him. The harmony that all of these Judgemental Christians are seeking for through pomp and tradition, Don has found by just watching and listening with an open mind and open heart to the wonders of Gods world.
He then later told me that if each of us would take a moment to see how tiny we are in the whole scheme of things, we would have NO CHOICE but to just be humble. We see the planet as the center of the world and US as the greatest thing on that planet...But the fact of the matter is, our solar system is by no means the greatest, and our sun is by no means the largest, and our planet rests in one of the OUTER MOST arms of our galaxy, not even close to the center.....We are so small that for us to judge in the light of Gods greatness is ludicrious.
Well enough babbling about my distain for self righteous and self centered christians....
I just want Jesus and his righteousness, I want to be a servant to HIM, I want to be in the game, not the person that Keeps score, Thats Gods job.
Goodnight world.

The sad state of todays so-called Christians
Mood:  irritated
Now Playing: Nothing
Topic: Christians, I think not
I never thought the day would come where I would say this, But the So -called christians of today are pulling people deeper into the fires of hell than any secular or heathen person could. I frequent a chat board called christian.net It should be a place of brotherhood and fellowship. The creator of the site Mr. Mark Morely is a nice and Godly man. His vision is being destroyed by these self-righteous judgemental and rather ignorant people that call themselves Christians.
They have now taken to judging a persons salvation by the title a person puts on his lifestyle. Such things as a Christian Goth, or a Christian metalhead are considered evil and not quite as good as the people who call them evil. They say tattoos are wrong and will send a person to hell, This and that is all worldly and God dont like it. They seem to think that NO ONE has a grip on what God wants like they do......I am so sick of it I do not wish to be called a Christian any more. I want to be called a Follower of Jesus Christ. I have NOT the right to judge what is in a mans heart because of what he wears or how many peircings or tattoos they have on them. This is the most assinine thing I have heard in a while.
I want to leave Christian.net but I know of no other place that I could even think of finding other Follwers of JEsus to talk with. Some of them are ok, Some of them dont judge...Maybe by saying all of this I am judging too. I dont want to judge but why cant Followers of the ONE TRUE GOD just get along and stop pointing fingers and judging....REfer to the new topic I am going to create tonight called Wisdom from Sarath.

Its all starting to make sense
Mood:  not sure
Now Playing: Cemetary- Act 1
Topic: My day today
Today was sort of an epephiny of a day. The day at work was not that good. I was sick most of the day. God made it possible for me to at least spend the first four hours of work on the computer system taking my tests. That helped allot.
But now on to more important things. For the past few weeks God has been showing me a few things that I was too dense to catch in all of my years as a christian. God has been putting things and more strongly PEOPLE in my life that has showed me some of the places in my life that I JUST WASNT GETTING IT. For example, as always there is Kim, Her humble acceptance of all people no matter where they are or who they are or what they are doing is one of the biggest helps to me I can have. Then there is my friend Jaime. Jaime is the type of person that before Jesus I would have kicked the crap out of and even up to a month or so ago I swore he was a pansy homo goth witch or something. Turns out he has a better understanding of what Jesus meant by LOVE THY NEIGHBOR than I do. He has been a christian for less time than me but has a gentle spirit that is very much a help for me. Then there is my friend Jess E. She has a way about her that just shows Jesus...But in a very real way. She simply believes and therefore acts like she believes. Then there is Wayno...He is a man that it seems that the world uses to wipe its butt on. But still, Wayno manages to preservere and always have a kind word for me no matter what tangent I am rambling on about. He , in doing this shows he is a Man of God. Then there is my buddy Paul who simply in his meek and kind way prays for me and just hopes that I get my head out of my butt and open my heart to what Jesus has in store for me.
Then last but not least is an unlikely person that isnt even a Christian I dont think. He is from Shri Lanka...whereever that is...But he is a thinker, and a man that is in search of harmony and peaceful cohabitation with all and everything around him....He is a very smart man and I could learn much from him by just observing.
It seems in all of this post I have neglected to mention what this great thing is that God has showed me. God has shown me the state of Modern American Christianity and has shown me it has come up wanting. We have left the commandments of Love your neighbor and perverted it into Love your neighbor if he is enough like you that he dont irritate or annoy you. Modern Christianity has traded Brotherhood and unity into a small celled self righteous terrorist organization that slanders and condemns everyone who does not share their self righteous Jihad if you will. I do not wish to be called a Christian anymore because of what that has become. Christian is just another word for self righteous judge. I wish to just be known as a Servant of Jesus Christ and nothing more. For in reality I am nothing more than a man who wants to love like Jesus loved and forgive like Jesus forgives. Beond that, in Me, Jim the man, there is nothing good nor worth mentioning.

food fun and dead cow
Mood:  lazy
Now Playing: Batzz in the Belfrey-out of the storm
Topic: My day today
Today was a pretty good day..Got up at about nine AM. Kim and I took off for a day of food , fun and Christmas shopping. We put a few things on lay away for the kids, then decided to get ourselves something, we got a combo scanner/printer/copier. Its gonna be our Christmas present to eaChother.
We had a coupon for a steak meal at a place in Beckley. Nothing like dead cow for food. I loved it, Kim got seared foul flesh. Got really full.
Then on the way home we stopped at a coffee/tea house called the Calidonia, Got their trademark deserts and allot of coffee. Man I had a wonderful day today.
At the moment I am talking to my good friend Jess. She is from the land of Cheese and the Packers. A cool lady if I do say so myself.
I guess its off to work for me in the morning....Im looking foreward to it....I love work. Although I feel like there is something I am not doing, something that is just not right.....something I am missing. I checked the normal things such as did i close the door, do I have pants on , did i close the fridge door.....stuff like that. All is in order.
Maybe i am just tired and need to relax and chat with my friend here and listen to some soothing music and.....Oh , thats what i am doing, just need the camomile tea and im all set...Nite www.

SO far today
Now Playing: Some crap kim has playing in the bathroom while showering
Topic: My day today
Well , its only 9:41 am and so far my day has been a bit strange. I got a call earlier from one of the bosses at work telling me to NOT COME IN TODAY because I am already on overtime...I had to explain to her that today and tomorrow are my days off. She sounded a bit embarrassed and said "oops did I wake you up?" When I told her yes, she said "Oh, go back to bed, sorry." But the strange part, the dream she was interrupting was: I was back in Newcomerstown Ohio and for some reason I worked for my Aunt Barbara, It was my day off of work from working for her but I was going to visit her, She told me that I was off of work today and didnt need to show up....THEN the phone rings and wakes me up and it was my boss telling me the very same thing.
More to come as it happens.

another good one
Mood:  a-ok
Now Playing: Nothing
Topic: My day today
I cant believe it, I have had another excellent day. This is three in a row. Everyone was at everyones throat today, Yesterday to male employees got into a fight, and then today two women. Sadly one of the women that was fighting was the one that gave me the excellent advice that got me to feeling happy and stress free at work.
Im enjoying a happy talk with my old buddy Wayno. I miss talking with him, but work has been sort of draining me. I try to get him to understand he has lived the life I have dreamed of, but he still thinks he is boring.....Man, I wish I could be as boring as him, then I would really have some fun.
Looking foreward to work tomorrow, I love my job. I like the people I work with. Don and Gabriel is pretty cool people. Don is the thinker, He is I believe from India cause he has a cool accent. He knows allot of different languages, Hes really smart and a dang nice person. Gabriel is my little mexican buddy, I call him Hermano Chiqita..which i think means little brother. I also like everyone else there.
Need to get to bed now, its twelve O four in the morning.....but im enjoying my icq chat with Wayno. Maybe I can catch him on here tomorrow night. So much to do, not enough time in the day to do it.
I thank God he puts such cool people in my life.

A good day.
Mood:  happy
Now Playing: Project 86 Toast to my former self.
Topic: My day today
I had a very very good day today at work. This is the second one in a row that stood out as better than normal.
Still a bit of tension with a close family member but its getting better.
Got to witness to a boy at work today. He asked how I could stay so positive when we was so bizzy...I said because I am a christian and I know at the end of the day, no matter how hard that day was, Im still a child of the Father.
Last week a Christian girl at work told me some of the best advice I could have gotten. It was this: "You can choose what kind of day you are going to have, you can choose to have a good day, or choose to have a bad one. A good attitude or a bad one." Good advice.