CONTINUED:
He grabs George by the lapels and shakes him violently.
He collapses in George's arms, crying on his shoulder.
He is sobbing hysterically with his arms around George.
Stanley immediately stops crying, and looks up hopefully at George.
(CONTINUED)
CONTINUED: (2)
Stanley shakes George's hand vigorously. They walk into a nearby elevator.
Stanley starts to wipe George's glasses as the elevator doors close behind them.
28 INT. PHILO'S WORKSHOP - CLOSE ANGLE ON TV MONITOR
VISUAL HOUSEWIFE
Housewife in Honey, where's the
suburban kitchen. spatula?
HUSBAND
Husband slaps forehead. Okay, kids... let's go!
ANNOUNCER (V.O.)
Excited family exits There's just one place to
house. go for all your spatula
needs...
Ext. stills - "Spatula (heavy echo) Spatula City!
City" - huge spatula on Spatula City!
building.
Int. stills - Spatula A giant warehouse of
City aisles - chryons: spatulas for your every
"MARKED DOWN!", need! Thousands to choose
"SATISFACTION from in every shape, color,
GUARANTEED!!", "FACTORY and size!
DIRECT TO YOU!!!"
People with shopping And because we eliminate
carts walking down the middleman, we can sell
aisles. all our spatulas factory
direct to you!
Same family in car Where do you go when you
with excited kids. want to buy name brand
spatulas at a fraction of
retail cost
(CONTINUED)
VISUAL
Billboard with giant (echo) Spatula City!
spatula: "Spatula Spatula City!
City - Home of the
Spatula - Next Exit"
Ext. Parking Lot - And this weekend only, take
People running advantage of our special
towards store. liquidation sale.
Woman holding spatula Buy nine spatulas - get the
in one hand and penny tenth one for just
in other; nine spatulas one penny!
flashing over her head.
Family opening presents Don't forget... they make
around Christmas tree - great Christmas presents!
kids hug parents.
(Soft focus) Man hands (hushed v.o.) And what
spatula with bow to better way to say 'I Love
woman over candlelit You' than with the gift of
dinner. a spatula...?
Dolly down aisle of (echo, shouting) Spatula
spatulas. City! Spatula City!
EXECUTIVE
Dull-looking executive Hello, this is Sy
type sitting at desk Greenblum, President of
with hands clasped. Spatula City. I liked
Chryon: SY GREENBLUM, their spatulas so much, I
PRESIDENT OF SPATULA bought the company!
CITY.
ANNOUNCER (V.O.)
Ext. Spatula City. Spatula City! Seven
Chryon: OPEN 'TIL locations! We're in the
MIDNIGHT! Yellow Pages...under
"Spatulas"!
Same family: husband, NEIGHBOR
kids, and neighbors My! Where did you get that
sitting at dining room lovely spatula?
table, being served by
housewife with spatula.
Husband and wife look MUSIC JINGLE
at each other, then Spatula City... We
wink at camera. sell spatulas, that's all!
Philo throws a switch, starting another commercial.
28 EXT. CITY HALL - DAY
A blind man playing with a Rubik's cube is sitting next to the bum we saw earlier.
(CONTINUED)
CONTINUED:
The bum answers "no" each time.
ANGLE ON PAM
Pam is at a pay phone outside of City Hall. A crowd of media people and assorted onlookers is milling about.
Pam does a double-take. From her P.O.V. we see a friendly, middle-aged midget holding the camera. This is NOODLES MACINTOSH.
30 EXT. CITY HALL FRONT STEPS - DAY
Richard Fletcher, an assistant, a cameraman and Frankie are getting ready to do their own live remote. Frankie sees something o.s. and nudges Richard. As Richard exits, Frankie notices a small bug on his arm and over-reacts, swatting it to the ground and stomping it violently.
ANGLE ON NOODLES
He is looking through his camera, adjusting the lens.
Two legs enter frame and stand directly in front of Noodles' camera.
(CONTINUED)
CONTINUED:
Noodles looks up from behind his camera.
He holds his hand waist-high.
Richard walks away. Noodles goes back to adjusting his camera.
30 INT. PHILO'S WORKSHOP - DAY
George cues Philo to begin the morning newscast.
CLOSE ANGLE - MONITOR
We see an EXTREME LOW ANGLE of Pam looking into camera.
ANGLE ON PHILO
Philo does a take to the monitor, puzzled by the extremity of the camera angle.
She turns and runs toward the mayor. On the monitor we see the jerky, low-angle motions of Noodles' camera in close pursuit.
32 EXT. CITY HALL STEPS
Pam is running toward the mayor with Noodles close behind, straining to keep up. Noodles runs directly in front of Richard, who nonchalantly sticks his foot out, sending the tiny cameraman and his camera crashing to the ground.
33 INT. PHILO'S WORKSHOP
The monitors got to static. Philo starts flipping switches frantically, trying to figure out what's wrong.
34 EXT. CITY HALL STEPS
Richard is standing over Noodles, who is still sprawled on the ground.
(CONTINUED)
CONTINUED:
Noodles is speechless as Richard and Frankie walk away, laughing.
ANGLE ON PAM
Pam is continuing towards the mayor, her back to Noodles. She hasn't seen what's been going on.
Turning toward Noodles, Pam sees what has happened and stares, dumbfounded. Frankie casually approaches her.
The crowd suddenly moves toward them as the mayor approaches, and Richard shoves Pam out of the way.
Pam is shaken up as she looks over towards Noodles, who is standing motionless, on the verge of tears. His camera lies broken at his feet.
35 INT. FLETCHER'S OFFICE - INTERCUT WITH PAM AT U62
Both are at their desks, on the phone. Pam is fuming.
She slams down the phone.
36 INT.U62 MAIN ROOM - DAY
Bob is at his desk, on the phone. Stanley is nearby, methodically polishing all the pencils in a pencil cup.
CLOSE ANGLE - TV MONITOR
On the monitor we see a cheesy chyron which says "Talk of the Town with George Newman" superimposed over two silhouetted figures. It is accompanied by STUPID BACKGROUND MUSIC.
The lights come up and we see George seated across from a guest.
U-62 STUDIO - GEORGE AND GUEST ON SET
George and Joe walk over to the demonstration area.
(CONTINUED)
CONTINUED:
He turns on the saw and shouts over the noise.
The blade starts cutting the wood. He turns toward George and continues cutting.
As he raises his hand, we see that a part of his thunb has been cut off, and is spurting blood everywhere. George looks horrified.
George gets on his knees and starts looking for Joe's thumb.
George hands Joe's thumb to him. Joe puts it in his pocket.
37 INT. MAIN ROOM
George walks out of the studio in a blood-soaked shirt and is greeted by Bob.
George smiles weakly.
38 INT. STUDIO - "UNCLE NUTZY" SET
Five or six bored-looking kids are sitting on a small set of bleachers. George is dressed in a silly multi-colored jacket and pork pie hat. We hear a DRUM ROLL as he runs into frame and the studio lights go up.
Billy spits in George's face.
We hear the o.s. HONKING of a BULB HORN.
Bob enters doing a silly dance, accompanied by KIDDIE THEME MUSIC and lukewarm applause from the kids. He is dressed up like a typical kiddie-show clown, complete with frizzy orange hair, clown make-up, and a giant red nose.
(CONTINUED)