Thunder kicks off live from Toronto, Ontario, Canada! The crowd is on their feet, waiting anxiously for the first NWA show to begin...
JR~ Welcome ladies and gentlemen! This is the NWA... and this is Thursday Night THUNDER!!!
King~ Hey everybody! This is Jerry ‘The King’ Lawler and my partner, Good Ol’ JR, Jim Ross! Tonight history will be made as this is the debut of the NWA! In tonight’s main event, Scott Steiner will be taking on...
Suddenly a countdown is shown on the titantron, interrupting King. The countdown begins, building anticipation as each number ticks away...
5
4
3
2
1
‘Break the Walls Down’ (Chris Jericho’s theme) hits over the PA system as the fans immediately begin to boo. The self proclaimed ‘Living Legend’ walks out, wearing a cocky grin. He turns around, back facing the crowd, and slowly raises his arms up into the air.
Lilian Garcia~ Ladies and gentlemen, making his way to the ring, from Winnipeg, Manitoba, Canada, weighing in at 231 lbs., please welcome... Chris Jericho!
Jericho turns around and slowly walks down the ramp, taunting the fans. He stops in front of one fan who is holding a Jericho Sucks! sign. Jericho grabs the sign and holds it up with a smirk on his face. Then Jericho pretends to give it back, but instead rips it in half.
Jericho continues walking, stopping once to flex his arms, showing off to a fan. Jericho climbs the steel steps and poses on the ring apron. Flashes from the crowd reflect off Jericho.
Chris climbs through the ropes and grabs a mic. He raises it to his lips, about to speak, but then lowers the mic as the fans start to chant Jericho Sucks!
“Would you please shut the hell up?!?! Maybe I could actually get a word in...”
The fans continue to boo but after a while the booing dies down.
“First of all, I would like to welcome everybody to... Thunder IS Jericho!!!”
“Now for those of you who don't know me, I am Chris Jericho, your new hero, your party host and most importantly, the most charismatic showman to ever enter your living rooms via a television screen. And for those of you who do know me...well, all hail the Ayatollah of Rock and Roll-ah!”
“And its only appropriate that I make my debut in the greatest country in the world!”
The fans cheer.
JR~ He’s just sucking up to them. That’s all he’s doing! He doesn’t even live in Canada anymore!
King~ Shut up, JR! Jericho is about to talk again!
“Well, the former greatest country. You see, it used to be back when this huge rock star still lived here! But since I left, Canada has fell apart. Canada has been filled with all these ass clowns you see here tonight!”
JR~ See, King! Jericho couldn’t care less about anybody, but himself!
“Now when you hear that this is the NWA’s first night, you think of a dawning of a new era. And it is the dawning of a new era... but not because this is the NWA’s first show. This is the dawning of a new era because the Larger than Life... LLLLLLLiving LLLLLLegend is here! Thank you...thank you.”
“And now for the first time in NWA history, you have a man who can entertain you, you have a man who is good enough for you, you have a man who can make you jump up off your chairs, raise your filthy, fat, little hands in the air and scream “Go Jericho Go, Go Jericho Go, Go Jericho Go!”
“And now I will let you in on a little secret... pretty soon, the most highly anticipated... the most highly entertaining... the most highly watched segment on all TV... Chris Jericho’s High-Lite Reel! Yes, the rumors are all true. The High-Lite Reel will debut in the up-coming weeks! And a person might ask exactly why would I name it the ‘High-Lite Reel’... well, it’s only fitting, since I am the High-Lite of the Nite!”
“Later on tonight, all my Jericholics in attendance and the millions watching at home will bear witness to Y2J beating the life out of Scott Steiner! Oh, look at me, I'm Big Poppa Pump. And I'm the big, bad rootie tootie, bootie, patootie, screwty daddy. That's not even real words, that's gibberish. That's baby talk. Well, Mr. Pump, you can take all your freaks and peaks and your geeks, and Iron Sheiks! ‘Cause nothing will help you when your facing the King of Bling-Bling! Steiner, your arms might be the largest in the world... but they sure are gross looking! And no matter how big you make your arms, it doesn’t make up for the fact that you have a... very... small... penis! It’s okay... it’s not your fault... it’s okay.”
“Scotty, let’s take a little walk down memory lane, shall we? Roll the footage, monkeys!”
The titantron plays footage of Y2J and Scott Steiner back in the WWE.
“Oh look, there’s when I locked the Walls of Jericho in on Scott Steiner!”
“And there’s me, doing push-ups right over Steiner’s life-less body!”
“And who’s that handsome young man that is making Steiner scream in pain? Oh, that’s me!”
“As you can see by my great video, all throughout history I have kicked that freak’s ass! Mr. Big Poppa Pump will be a walk in the park, so why bore you with more of Steiner! ‘Cause I know what you people truly want to hear... and that is more about the King... of the WORLD!”
The crowd boos.
“Oh, shut up! What do all you stupid Canadians know?!”
JR~ Jericho is Canadian! What’s he talking about?
“You ASS clowns need to show me the respect that I deserve! After all, I am a HUGE rock star! I was the first Undisputed Champion!”
The fans start to chant asshole.
“That’s it! I’m sick and tired of wasting my precious time talking to you lllllllosers! Steiner, after I beat your ass tonight, you will NEVER eeeeeeeever be the same again!!!”
Jericho’s music hits as he drops the mic and rolls out of the ring. He starts to walk up the ramp as the fans sitting ringside give him the middle finger. Jericho smirks and then continues walking to his lockerroom as the scene fades to a commercial break...
