Hey fair folks of CCW! I'm the narrator! I talk in italics! I cue music...and describe stuff...right? Anyways I might as well get down to business. Our scene opens at the border between Canada and Minnesota. Slowly you can hear those opening drum beats to Survivor's "Eye of The Tiger" the classic theme of keeping on. Emerging slowly from the foggy distance is non other then new comer to CCW and Certified Badass Tommy Drake accompanied by nameless people jogging in sweats. The thrilling wrestler was adorned in a black zip up jacket, matching pants. As the song beats as Tommy and nameless wonders follow him like in Rocky they slowly stop as Tommy crosses the border into Canada...the music abruptly ending as the kids and people stop, just staring at him.
Tommy: "What? It's just Canada. You don't need a citizenship here to follow me."
Random Minnesota Guy Following Drake: "But...it's Canada. I hear if you go up there you never come back...Run for your life people! Guys in red suits are coming for Tommy!"
And with that they abandoned Tommy as the two mounties slowly walked up Tommy, looking him over.
Mountie #1: "License and registration eh."
Tommy: "Ok eh."
Tommy fished through his pockets to realizes he didn't have any pockets on him as he shrugged sheepishly
Mountie #2: "If yeh have no license or registration you're going to have to come with us eh."
Tommy stares at them in dred, opening his pockets as he gulps
Tommy: "What's this all aboot? I have the write to be on Canadian grounds without registration."
Tommy suddenly finds himself handcuffed by Mountie #2 as Mountie #1 talks to him.
Mountie #1: "True. But yeh under arrest for impersonating a Canadian, in Canada when your from Minnesota."
Tommy: "But isn't Minnesota the next best thing to Canada?"
Mountie #2: "Nope."
Tommy sighs as he's slowly dragged around by the mounties to a large car that appears out of nowhere. He slowly steps into the back of the large van as slowly the clunky engine ignites as the camera focuses on Tommy's face as gives a small shrug.
Tommy: "Ahh, my very first match on live CCW television. I'm sure as hell excited! I mean its finally a chance for a not too well known guy like me to show my face in another country. I mean I'm just taking over North America. First US, then Mexico, then US again and now Canada! What can I say beside its a beautiful country, with friendly people and some great wrestling. But enough of that kind of jibber jabber. I have a match this week. That's right folks a match. You see in my grand spankin debut on Talent and well I'm psyched. Thing is though I facing some Switch guy. Now Switch from what I understand your a highly talented wrestler. I mean I've seen some of your work your worthy of being the respected star your being billed at. In most cases I would say I'd give it my all and let the best man win. But seeing that I am a certified badass and former TWF tag champ and the fact you've ignored me all through this week then well I'm a little bit more then disappointed. I think your scared."
Tommy gives his cocky little grin as he exhales some breath, steam slowly arising from his mouth as he slowly begins to maneuver his hands around his back, an old trick to get your hands infront of you while in cuffs. The mounties meanwhile ramble on about various topics.
Mountie #1: "See the game last night?"
Mountie #2: "Which one?"
Mountie #1: "You know, the game."
Mountie #2: "Oh! That game. I thought that was tonight?"
Mountie #1: "Nope. You confused it with that game."
Mountie #2: "So your telling me the big game was last night?"
Mountie #1: "No you silly man. That's tonight."
Tommy slips his hands to rest upon his lap as the van slowly moves along, looking into the front windshield from the back he notices it looks like he's on a film set. He asks aloud to him.
Tommy: "First off, you guys haven't said "eh" in a while. You sure your canadian?"
The two mounties stare back at him and look around...
Mountie's Together: "YES WE ARE!"
Tommy backs off a bit and nods to them, just shrugging.
Tommy: "Hey, sorry man. Back to Switch. I mean I understand you being above me and all but c'mon! You could at the very atleast acknowledge me as some challenge. I understand that I am that good as a wrestle since well... I'm Tommy Drake. But still man. Show some love. Show some pride. Show something! Because as of now you haven't shown me anything. Sure I said I enjoyed your work but I decided I'm going to completely forget about it now. I know I look like a little chickenshit. Can I say chicken shit? I guess I can. Chickenshit with my rantings and ravings about how I'm so good but really when your making your fool look like a fool verbally right after he lost in a number one contendership match you can be a little cocky. I mean I do hope you atleast show up for your match. I mean that would be just disgraceful to not bother showing up for our match because frankly I'm a bit anxious so see how well The Innovator of Innovation, the wrestling book with the right hook and a certified badass in nearly 70 countries fares against a fabled star of Canadian Championship Wrestling. But to do so I need to get out of this van."
suddenly takes keen notice of how his hands are free (minus the thought
of the handcuffs) and the fact the door could be opened. Tommy slowly eases
over and turns the handle, the mounties continue to rant about "the game"
as he throws the door open and begins to run, realizing that in fact the
van hadn't moved at all since he was thrown. With a mad spring he makes
haste to cross over into the Minnesota/United States border line between
the countries. The two mounties, suddenly without a conversation notice
their felon has escaped and come running, armed with night sticks are they
Mountie #2: "HEY! You run to fast eh!"
Mountie #1: "Yeah! Let us catch up to make things fair!...eh!"
Tommy sighs as he rolls his shoulders out and pops his neck.
Tommy: "Make you a deal. Let me out of the cuffs, give me a beat to rap to and let me get a 10 minute head start then I'll let you chase me."
Mountie #1 and #2 eye Tommy suspiciously as they huddle, whispering non-descript words that cannot be understood. They break and mountie #2 speaks for them.
Mountie #2: "We have decided that you are a fair one Minnesota man and we will grant you that. Mountie #1, give him his beat and the key's to the cuffs.
Mountie #1 nods as he tosses Tommy the keys, Tommy catching them in his palms as he inserts them into the locks on his cuffs as they slide off his wrists with ease as Mountie #1 begins his fat beat as Tommy begins a slow walk back into Minnesota
Not so long ago in a place we call today
I was rolled along to wrestle in Canadeh!
My skill so skilled that I needed a license to even use them.
McKormick's laziness will grant him a brusin.
You know I'm better then some rookie.
I've got more skills then that.
Don't bother your post match nookie
Your getting pinned to the mat.
I know I'm untouchable
And your a fallen star
Tee Drake's indestructible!
And you'll be broken like car.
Call my boasts too big or too high
When were finished you'll know I speak no lie
Russ And Tee Drake rolling in the big times
Your nothin but a fat nugget with some small fries!
Fade to Black