[Spiderman Marathon]


...Another step has been taken the ultimage goal here in Superior Wrestling. Two more wannabes sent home with their tales between their legs.. making what happened at Sudden Immorality seem more and more like a fluke. But let's face it -- no one can turn back the hands of time and right the wrong. All you can do is push forward. And that's precisely what Tommy Grady is in the process of doing. Granted, it will not be forgotten -- and it WILL be avenged. Since the combination of Staggs and Grady has come into existence, it has been a broadly accepted fact that those two men are the favorites for the tag team title straps. They took care of what is very likely to be the toughest competition throughout the round robin tournament. Truth be known.. favorites often fail. Champions do not...

:::Scene opens with an image of a home. We zoom in and begin to recognize this home as that of Aaron Everage, which shelters Tommy Grady. The camera travels up the same worn down steps that we're accustomed to crawling up. We push through the front door and take a right down a hallway. We pass the computer room to our left and continue down the hall. We cut into a room to the right and notice Tommy Grady sitting on the corner of the bed with a comic book in his hand. The camera settles and we see Grady slamming the comic book against his head and letting out grunts:::

Tommy Grady - AAH! .. [pulls comic book down on head] .. GRRRR!


Aaron Everage - TOMMY! TOMMY! What are you doing, Tommy..

Tommy Grady - I've been caught.. I must not be distracted! .. [pulls comic more over his head] .. I'M COMING SPIDERMAN!

Aaron Everage - What the hell is going on?

Tommy Grady - .. [frowns].. Spiderman is in trouble.. I'm trying to save him, Aaron!

Aaron Everage - It's a story..

Tommy Grady - To some.. to others, it's a way of life, Ev!

Aaron Everage - No.. it's a comic.. drawings that tell a story..

Tommy Grady - Of life..

Aaron Everage - Of a fantasy life..

Tommy Grady - And that's why I was going to save him..

Aaron Everage - By pulling a comic book over your head?

Tommy Grady - .. and pulling..

Aaron Everage - And you thought that'd work?

Tommy Grady - You're right.. [stands up] .. I have a better idea.. [dances] .. What Blue can do.. we can TOO!

:::Tommy closes his eyes and point to the comic laying on the bed:::

Aaron Everage - ... still here..


Aaron Everage - I think your problem is that you're human and not on TV or in a book..

Tommy Grady - You've found my flaw, Ev! That's obvious, but must you exploit it?

Aaron Everage - Relax..

Tommy Grady - How can I relax with Tazi on the loose?

Aaron Everage - He's actually no longer on the loose thanks to the better side of you..

Tommy Grady - Is that my right side?

Aaron Everage - No..

Tommy Grady - I've been told my right side is like a blooming flower beneath a half risen sun..

Aaron Everage - You've been lied to..

Tommy Grady - You sure? Look again..

Aaron Everage - You're right.. you've been BRUTALLY lied to..


Aaron Everage - Look, Tommy.. I'm going on a date tonight. This lady is bringing over her son and I'm embarassed to tell her that I'm taking care of a man the same age as me so you're in charge of taking care of her son.. Now, I'm trying to track a babysitter down, but if my attempt fails -- don't act normal..

Tommy Grady - Okay.. should I try not to be sexy, like I so obviously am?

Aaron Everage - More along the lines of don't be a childish idiot..

Tommy Grady - How dare you ask for some flavor, with that comment!

Aaron Everage - You mean a favor?

Tommy Grady - First some flavor.. now a favor? Dude, I'm not a machine. I'm not a renaissance man.. I'm not Spider freakin' Man, doo.. I can only do so much..

Aaron Everage - Tommy, just pop in a movie.. play board games.. watch TV.. just don't try to entertain yourself.. get it?

Tommy Grady - DUDE! I could just pop in a Josh Silver promo and make it a nap time!

Aaron Everage - PERFECT!

Tommy Grady - That was a joke.. I don't tape that crap.. it'd leave poop streaks on the film..

Aaron Everage - Well do you have any better ideas?

Tommy Grady - I could do a shimmy and cluck like a chicken..

Aaron Everage - What would that accomplish..

Tommy Grady - You're right.. I wouldn't want the kid to think I'm THAT cool..

Aaron Everage - [rolls his eyes] .. Yeah.. that's WAY too cool.. how about you just watch TV.. no entertainment, okay?

Tommy Grady - Are you saying there will be a Josh Silver promo on tonight?

Aaron Everage - If we're lucky..

Tommy Grady - I don't have to watch them anymore.. hooray for me!

Aaron Everage - Yeah.. lucky you..

Tommy Grady - [sings] .. I'm so lucky.. I'm a star.. but I CRY CRY CRY--

Aaron Everage - Quit it..

Tommy Grady - You're eye-ballin' a future star, Ev! Take a picture..

Aaron Everage - It'd break the lens..

Tommy Grady - WHATEVA! It'd melt the lens cuz I'm so hot and steamy, doo.. WHATEVA!

Aaron Everage - Shut up..

Tommy Grady - Should I rub my nipples in a circular motion?

Aaron Everage - No..

Tommy Grady - You're just jealous that your nipples aren't rosy red like mine, doo..

Aaron Everage - Yup.. I sure am..

Tommy Grady - You're pathetic puny pink nipples suck..

Aaron Everage - Is that we've come to? Insulting nipples?

Tommy Grady - There comes a time to insult nipples.. today is one of those times, Ev..

Aaron Everage - You need to grow up..

Tommy Grady - [bobbing his head to the music].. I don't wanna grow up.. I'm a Toys R Us kid.. there's a million toys at Toys R Us that I can play with..

Aaron Everage - Enough with the singing..

Tommy Grady - Does it make you jealous that you weren't blessed with the same talents as me?

Aaron Everage - That's exactly it..

Tommy Grady - Not everyone can be born with the freestylin' SKEELZ that I'm blessed with..

Aaron Everage - Most certainly not.. especially with the originality..

Tommy Grady - Oh, you want original?

Aaron Everage - Gimme original..

Tommy Grady - [bobbing his head] .. Yo... yo yo.. yo yo.. my name is Grady-yo.. I rock yo television yo.. all the time yo.. am I ugly - no.. FO SHO!

Aaron Everage - Wow..

Tommy Grady - Amazed?

Aaron Everage - No..

Tommy Grady - It's cuz I'm black, ain't it? AIN'T IT!

Aaron Everage - I doubt that..

Tommy Grady - You're supposed to say yes and then I quit cuz you're racist..

Aaron Everage - A2 isn't a role model, Tommy.. quit acting like him..

Tommy Grady - He's a former champion..

Aaron Everage - And look at him now..

Tommy Grady - Wow.. that's a great point..

:::Ding Dong:::

Aaron Everage - She's here.. now don't make a fool of me..

Tommy Grady - Whateva..

:::Aaron leaves the room and Grady pops out of his bed to follow him into the other room:::

Aaron Everage - [opening door] .. Hey sweet heart, how are you doing tonight?

Aaron's Date - Hey Aaron..

Tommy Grady - Whoa momma! Get a load of the jugglies!

Aaron's Date - Get a load of who?

Tommy Grady - Those huge almonds on your chest..

Aaron Everage - TOMMY!

Tommy Grady - I mean, uh.. you have some nice titty meat..

Aaron Everage - THAT'S BETTER?

Aaron's Date - Who's this guy?

Aaron Everage - He's Tommy.. He's..

Tommy Grady - Sexy, intellegent.. and wishing this was Mardi Gras so I could see those jugglies..

Aaron Everage - TOMMY!

Aaron's Date - He's cute..

Tommy Grady - CUTE?! I'm not a puppy, miss..

Aaron Everage - That was a compliment..

Tommy Grady - .. but I'll do ya doggy style.

Aaron Everage - TOMMY!

Tommy Grady - That was a compliment TOO!

Aaron Everage - I'm so sorry about this..

Aaron's Date - It's fine.. I can take a joke..

Tommy Grady - Are you the big pimp chillin' with me tonight?

Date's Son - Uh huh..

Aaron Everage - His name is Billy..

Tommy Grady - Hello Billy..

Date's Son - Hi..

Aaron Everage - I'll make a few calls on my way to see if anyone can come by and watch-- er.. hang out with you guys.. We're off though..

Tommy Grady - Shucks..

Date's Son - BYE MOMMY!

Aaron Everage - Be good, Tommy..

Tommy Grady - Bye mommy.. [going for a hug].. I'll miss you.. [grabs a boob].. you guys too..

Aaron's Date - TOMMY!

Tommy Grady - Oops.. hand slipped..

Aaron Everage - GOODBYE!

Tommy Grady - Later brutha! Hit it once for me.. [wink].. I'll miss you four..

Aaron Everage - ... Tommy..

:::Tommy closes the door:::

Tommy Grady - So what do you wanna do, dude?

Billy - Watch the Florida/Kentucky game..

Tommy Grady - Florida is wrestling Kentucky? SWEET!

Billy - It's basketball..

Tommy Grady - Basketball? That's stupid..

Billy - You don't have to watch it.. it's a big game..

Tommy Grady - There's a Spiderman marathon on Cartoon Network..

Billy - I'm twelve, not five..

Tommy Grady - I didn't say you were five.. I said SPIDERMAN..

Billy - Spiderman is for kids..

Tommy Grady - If it was for kids it would be SpiderKID.. dude.. he's a man!

Billy - You're dumb.. Aaron said I could watch TV.. go watch Spiderman in your room or somethin', fag..

Tommy Grady - You're mean, dude..

Billy - [walking away] .. you're gay..

Tommy Grady - AM NOT!

:::Tommy frowns. He moves into the kitchen and gazes off into space as he pulls out a bottle out of the fridge. He doesn't look down as he pours a clear substance into a cup. He puts the bottle down and takes a drink:::

Tommy Grady - BAH! This water is old.... Aaron must have left the lid off of it.. gross..


Billy - Yo.. you got a drink?

Tommy Grady - I have a drink, pal.. but how about you get it your damn self?

Billy - Alright.. I was just asking..

Tommy Grady - Look who you're asking..

Billy - Ooo.. a big scary loser guy..

Tommy Grady - Ya'know what, Bill, my friend? You definitely have too big of a lip for your own good.. and that's fine. I've become accustomed to big mouth losers like yourself. I face them on a day to day basis.. [looks at the camera] .. whether it's Josh Silver, Jack Diamond.. anyone from here to there. The fact is, there are more people with big mouths than should be allowed to live on this planet. But I learn to deal with it. There can be no changing.. while some people have free time to go find a date because they're too pathetic to get one themselves.. others train. Jackrabbit, I really don't know who you're trying to kid. You put on a great show. You're entertaining outside of the ring, but what exactly can you do inside of it? I guess that's something we'll get to find out this weekend on Adrenaline. It's a shame you have the misfortune of teaming with a loser like Kryptonite. On top of that.. receiving a meeting with Tommy Grady and Chris Staggs.. the best tag team in Superior Wrestling. The SWF front office must have a bone to pick with you because anyone they toss into the ring with us is going to come out brutally beaten. The fact is, when Adrenaline rolls around.. the two of you are in deep trouble. Two of the most talented wrestlers in this business will be in the same ring together.. as your opponents. It's an honor for you.. just another match for us. The tag team title is at the end of this constant trail, my friend. And at that end.. you are not even a player. Enjoy your shot in the spotlight, because it won't last long..

Billy - What the hell are you talking about? Why is that camera here? Is this like the Osbournes?

Tommy Grady - How about you keep your fuckin' mouth shut, youngen? You've already pushed the limit and I don't have much refraining power left in me. I'm about to smack you silly..

:::Ding dong:::

Billy - Is that your boyfriend, fag?

Tommy Grady - AAAH! .. [grabs his head]... geez..

:::Grady shakes his head as the door opens:::


|Enter Chris Staggs|

|Enter Chris Naggs|

Chris Staggs - GRADY!

Tommy Grady - STAGGERS?!

Billy - It IS your gay partner, fag!

Chris Naggs - Aaron said you needed a babysitter..

Tommy Grady - Whateva..

Chris Staggs - FO SHO!

Chris Naggs - So don't be too much trouble..

Tommy Grady - I'm no trouble.. I'm like ice.. I'm cool and meltin' like a chill pill doo!

Billy - Wow.. I've entered hell..

Chris Staggs - You've entered hell before? What was it like?

Billy - This..

Chris Staggs - FO SHO?

Chris Naggs - Don't scare him, young man..

Tommy Grady - I think this kid is Satan himself..

Billy - If that'll get me out of here, I'd be happy to be satan himself..

Chris Staggs - You scare me..

Chris Naggs - I said don't scare him, young man..

Tommy Grady - Billy doesn't care.. he just wants to watch hoops..

Billy - You're right..

Chris Staggs - Well, it's a good thing I brough my hoola hoop..

Chris Naggs - He's talking about basketball..

Tommy Grady - DUDE! I wanna play hoola hoops!

Billy - You're both homo!

Chris Staggs - My name isn't mo.. and I'm not a ho..

Chris Naggs - Yeah..

Tommy Grady - FO SHO!

Billy - Am I surrounded by idiots?

Chris Staggs - Dude, Tommy.. that rhymed!

Tommy Grady - I know, doo! Almond Eminem.. it's all in the mix baby!

Chris Staggs - FO SHO!

Tommy Grady - Dude.. we gotta go watch Spiderman!

Chris Staggs - Spiderman is on and we're missing it?!

Tommy Grady - Yeah, doo..

Billy - Oh God..

Chris Staggs - I

Tommy Grady - SHH! Billy was about to pray.. he needs to repent for going to hell..

Billy - No, I was astonished by the gayness in this room..

Chris Staggs - You're gay?

Chris Naggs - He is?

Tommy Grady - I don't know..

Billy - NO!

Chris Staggs - BULL!

Chris Naggs - Yeah, I'll call bullshit on that one..

Tommy Grady - Yeah, doo.. WHATEVA! You gay..

Billy - I'm far from gay, unlike you fags..

Chris Staggs - You are what you eat!

Chris Naggs - That' doesn't make sense..

Tommy Grady - I guess we should call him DICK then.. HAHAHA!

Chris Staggs - FO SHO!

Billy - I've had it with you morons..

Chris Staggs - You've had what?

Billy - I'm tired of it..

Chris Staggs - Chris, he's confusing me..

Chris Naggs - Don't confuse him, young man..

Tommy Grady - Yeah, dude..

Billy - I didn't do anything..

Chris Staggs - I did your mom..

Tommy Grady - HA! ME TOO!

Billy - No you didn't..

Tommy Grady - His mom has huge tits..

Chris Staggs - FO SHO?

Tommy Grady - Fo DEFINITE sho..

Billy - Quit talking about my mom..

Chris Staggs - DUDE..... Spiderman!

Tommy Grady - OH YEAH!


Chris Naggs - Don't run in the house..

Tommy Grady - Whateva..

Chris Staggs - FO SHO!

Chris Naggs - .... kids..

Billy - But they're, like.. 30..


Chris Staggs - FO SHO!

Tommy Grady - Go watch hoops loser.. losers watch hoops.. LOSER!

Chris Staggs - Yeah, loser..

Tommy Grady - Slooser!

Billy - Slooser?

Tommy Grady - That's my new word for a super loser..

Chris Staggs - That RULES!

:::Tommy and Staggs make their way out of the room towards the TV room. Billy shakes his head and looks at Naggs. Naggs shrugs his shoulder as the theme song of Spiderman can be heard in the background.. Naggs walks off and Billy shakes his head with a disappointed look on his face. The scene slowly fades to black:::

...Jackrabbit, the heat is rising. Adrenaline is approaching. You and your tag team partner are awaiting your chance at greatness, but the fact is -- you'll fail. Tommy Grady is a very talented athlete. He has not been defeated many times. You have some talent, there is no denying that. In fact, I respect you -- but your partner, Kryptonite.. let's just say that when Adrenaline comes around he'll be your weakspot. And he'll be the reason that the winners of the match is the team: Whateva Fo Sho...

ThIs MeSsAgE hAs BeEn BrOuGhT tO yOu By: