The scene opens at four o clock in the afternoon. Matt Hardy is in his locker room. He is about to get to an autograph session in North Carolina. Matt is ready and waiting for his limo driver. Suddenly there is a knock on his door.
Will: Hi I'm you're new driver. Sorry Im late.
|| Matt || Yeah okay. Dont make it a habit. I'll be out in a minute! My gym bag is there, dump in the boot for me and I'll be along in a minute!
Matt walks off to the back as he sees Kim in her bikini getting ready for a warm bath. Matt looks at her.
|| Matt || Hey Kim. Im going to the autograph signing.
|| Kim || OK Matt. Dont take to long ok?
|| Matt || I wont.
Matt kisses Kim on her forehead as he walks out. Matt walks out the locker room. After a few minutes of walking, walking, and more walking he finally reaches the parking lot where he enters his limo.
|| Matt || Have you been told about my schedule?
Will: Yes sir, you're first stop is at the JJ Sportex Store on 51 street.
|| Matt || Well get on with it then. I need to find the remote for the tv...
Will: There is no remote sir.
|| Matt || Really. Damn. Ill turn it on manually I guess. Oh wait. Where's the TV?
Will: There is none sir.
|| Matt || What? How can you have a limo without a TV? That's just lupidocity. Well how long is this autograph signing for?
Will: Well sir. It should be for two hours sir.
|| Matt || Great! Just Great! Tell me when we get there!!
Hours Pass. The limo pulls up to the store and there is a huge line outside the store. The door opens and Matt Hardy steps out and looks out at the fans.
|| Matt || Matt Hardy, Version 1.0 has arrived! So all you people can just hold up. I'll be ready to sign autographs and talk to all my MF-ers in just a little while.
Matt Hardy walks up to the door and walks in! Security are there to make sure no one causes any problems. He sure has a hell of a big following. Half an hour goes by when the store finnaly opens. Fans run in screaming towards Matt Hardys stand!
Matt Hardy is after signing a mountain of autographs and then Eric walks up with his Matt Hardy Rulez, Chris Jericho Droolz t-shirt. Smart fan eh? He walks to Matt.
Eric: Returning was the greatest thing you did Matt. And going after the World title would have been good, but I guess gold is gold. And working your way to the top will be great for you.
|| Matt || Wow. A smart Mf'er
Eric: Thank you sir. So when are you going to go for the Cruiserweight title again. You were a good champion before, and Matt Hardy as cruiserweight champion is money Matt
|| Matt || What? No no kid. You got it all wrong. I don't want anything to do with the Cruiserweight Title! Im going for the IC title then I will get the World title.
Eric: World title? Really? I know you won the Royal Rumble, but I dont think you are really good enought to be champion.
|| Matt || Me, not good enough? You're kidding right? You're not kidding? What kind of a fool are you? I've got all the Mattributes to be the World Champion! I mean look at me! I've got Mattitude oozing out of every pore of my body! You know what? Get the hell out of here! Go on! You don't deserve someone like Matt Hardy to sign your shirt!
Matt looks a little pissed off as the next person walks up! This guy is wearing a Matt Hardy V1 T-Shirt and cap. He looks like he is a good fan but looks like a dumbass!
Scott: Hi Matt, I'm you're biggest fan!
|| Matt || Nice to meet you! It's good to see some good honest MF-ers here today! What do you want me to sign?
Scott: Could you sign this book and this T-Shirt.
|| Matt || Yeah sure.
Scott: Thanks you're my favorite Superstar in the World. It really is an honour meeting you!
|| Matt || Thank you. Im my favourite superstar as well. I'm always happy to meet a true MF-er!
Scott: Good luck at King of the Ring. I know you can do it!
|| Matt || Well thanks but I don't need luck. This is Matt Hardy you're talking too! I will win the IC title strap and go on to become the greatest this federation has ever seen.
Scott: Thanks again!
Matt continues signing, but the fans do start to get dumber by the time. Then Steve walks up to him.
Steve: Matt Hardy. Wow, its a pleasure to meet you.
|| Matt || Im glad you're pleasured.
Steve: Can I have a picture with you?
|| Matt || Urm sure. But wouldnt you just want me instead of both of us. I mean that would make the picture look ten times better.
Steve: I know that. But then I can brag to my fellow Mf'ers that I met Matt Hardy.
|| Matt || Ok then.
The fan gets a security guard to take a picture. After an hour or two, the last fans walks up to Matt.
|| Matt || So last Mf'er. What would you like me to sign?
|| Matt || What do you want me to sign?
|| Matt || This is the line to get your merchandise signed by Matt Hardy! What do you want me to sign?
Brad: Oh! Ah, I don't want anything signed I just want a corndog!
|| Matt || WHAT? Get the hell out of here! I cant believe he queued up for hours just to say that.
Matt seems pissed off as another Brad to grace the confines of WWCF makes an ass out of himself. Jackass eh? Matt then leaves the stand as he walks back to his limo. The limo driver takes him to his next destination, to answer questions from MF'ers. Great huh? Matt is waiting for the press conference to start. Matt raises his arm and flashes the Version "1" sign at the fans then he sits down.
|| Matt || Hello, it's nice to see such a great turnout for this. But what else would I have expected. I mean it is me. I look forward to answering all your questions! I really do. So lets get right to it. Whos the lucky Mf'er. You!!
Alex: Hello. My names Alex, I was just wondering what was your reasoning behind returning?
|| Matt || WHAT?
Alex: Why did you return?
|| Matt || Wrestlings my life duh?
Alex: WRESTLING?? Arent you a basketball player.
|| Matt || Security!! Another ALEX that deserves to be in the mental hospital. Ok next!
Jeff: Hi Matt. Jeff Sterling here. Could you tell us your thoughts on your draw last week on Raw?
|| Matt || My thoughts huh? Well, it was for the number one contendership. I was facing the Hurricane. I didnt put the best I had because I didnt expect the Hurricane to give me one hell of a match. But he did. He proved he can make it big, despite what I may have said. He put his heart and soul into it, but I guess it wasnt the best to beat Matt Hardy. I had one aim and that was to be number one contender to the Ic title at King of the Ring.
Jeff: But dont you think that being number one contender is kind of tainted. You didnt actually win.
|| Matt || Maybe not MF'er.
Jeff: WHAT? I am not a Mother F*c..
|| Matt || No Mattitude Follower. Not that.
Jeff: Oh yea, gotcha.
|| Matt || You say its tainted? Well lets put it this way. It doesnt matter if you win by an inch or a mile, winning is winning right?
|| Matt || Well my aim was to be number one contender. Did I leave Raw last week as number one contender?
Jeff: Yeah, you did.
|| Matt || So my Mattributes took me as far as I needed. I am number one contender.
Jeff: Wow. you are so inciteful. That was great. Your greatness is awe-inspiring.
|| Matt || I know. So whos next.
Lil Timmy: Hi, I was just thinking that you havent held the Tag titles yet. Will you be calling Jeff Hardy to come out of the drug rehabilitation clinic to reform the Hardy Boyz?
|| Matt || Well you know what. My eyes are on the tag titles right now. But Jeff Hardy? No way. Matt Hardy carried Jeff Hardy. Remember that. Matt Hardy has progressed to far to go back to the Hardy Boyz now! Jeff may be stuck in the past but I'm not! Matt Hardy is out to prove he is the leader, and thats what will happen.
Timmy: Well you must be really concerned that the cruiserweight title was abolished by Vince.
|| Matt || No I'm not! I have no interest in becoming the Cruiserweight Champion again and I am glad it got abolished. Matt Hardy Version "1.0" will use his given Mattributes to hold a much more prestigious championship than the Cruiserweight Title!
Timmy: But you always blow the big one. I mean I dont think you can win the IC title.
|| Matt || Security!!
Security come on hand to take away little timmy.
Jason Voorhies: Do you really believe you are going to win the IC title. That is the second most prestigious title this federation has. You have said you are going to win it. But How can you be so sure?
|| Matt || How can I be so sure? How do I know that I am going to win the IC title. I know it because every time I go in the ring I can feel it all around me! The Mattitude in the air is something that no one has ever felt before. It infects you! It takes over! It takes over so much that you are driven more and more to be the best and to be a Champion! Being the IC champion will make me the number two guy in this federation. That way I will be able to on Jericho for the World title.
JV: You think you can beat Jericho?
|| Matt || Yeah "ASSCLOWN" Haha. I mean in a world title match I wont blow that. Everything will be on the line and I do think that I can win the biggest title in this federation. And first of all, I will do that by winning the number two belt in this federation.
Freddie Kruger: Well Matt. What about your match on Raw. You will be facing Chris Jericho and Hurricane. You think you can win that?
|| Matt || Why not. Thinking isnt the fact. Knowing is. Im not going to get pinned. Im not going to lose on Raw. Chris Jericho and Hurricane will get a shock if they think they can keep down the man on the roll. Matt Hardy will be the man to beat. You over there.
Greg: Ace reporter, Gregory helms. I have a question for you, Mr Hardy.
|| Matt || Go ahead son. Spill your guts.
Greg: What are your plans for Raw. Most importantly what will you do when you face of with the Hurricane on Raw.
|| Matt || Well im sorry man. I cant really tell you incase the Hurricane is listening.
Greg: (mutters) I see Citizen Hardy is smarter and more devious than I thought.
|| Matt || Sorry?
Greg: Oh. Well do you have any final words?cant you tell us anything?
|| Matt || Well Gregory. This past week I've been asked the same question over and over again. No matter where I go, no matter what I do. No matter what is going on around me I keep getting asked the same question. People walk up to me and say, "Oh Matt what are you planning for RAW?" Every single time I was asked I told them wait and see! Wait and see!
Greg: I see. Do continue.
|| Matt || Well just between you and me Greg. This Tuesday night on Raw, I'm going to make....an Impact! That's it! On Raw I will show the Hurricane and Chris Jericho what is in store in the future. Hurricane will realise what he has coming at KOTR and Jericho will realise what he has coming After Summerslam. You see for KOTR I have a Mattematics problem for you. The equation is V1 + KOTR =
Greg: I have no idea.
|| Matt || 'V1 IC' which means "Version 1 + King of the Ring equals Intercontinental champion" This isn't just a Mattematic equation, oh no!! This is the truth! This is something that will come to fruition at the King of the ring in a few days time. This is the future people. This is the beginning of the Era of Mattitude!!
Matt leaves the stand as he thanks everyone once again. He enters the limo which is going to be taking him to Raw.