Batist's Royal Rumble RP#1

People Used: Kevin Kelly, Flair and Myself
People Mentioned: All Royal Rumble Participants
Record: 2-0-0
Stable: None

***The Show begins showing the monstrous youngster Batista is walking victorious from both his RAW and Smackdown! Matches he still doesn't know what Brand he should join but after the Rumble Batista Promises to make his mind up and he is getting phsyched for his big PPV Match The Royal Rumble he is wearing his usuall Maroon Tights with Yellow Flames streaking across his Black hair is is neatly cropped as he is walking down the Hallway he enters a room a very dark room Batista grabs some Hand Cream and has a magazine with him he opens the door just a bit to see if anyone is out in the hallway no one is there so as Batista clicks on the lights Flair is there***

Batista:
AAAAHHHHHHH!!! Don't Scare me Like that!!!! What the hell are you doing here anyway??

Ric Flair:
Well Batista whats this a magazine of Trish Stratus I see and Hand Lotion what where you gonna do in this room with these!!!

Batista:
None of your business you old fart now why are you hear and answer me!!!!

Ric Flair:
Well Batista I just was wondering around and I thought this was a great place for me to do thinking and here you are and I was just thinking of you so you ready to hear me!!!

Batista:
Whats your offer??

Ric Flair:
Well what about joining Smackdown! and I'll give you a Heavyweight Shot!!!!

Batista:
Ummm No!!!!! I'm not that desperate yet!!! Now if you'd excuse me I gotta go!!!

Ric Flair:
Alright but think about what I said Dave!!!!!

***Batista just nods his head in disgust and hands Flair the Hand Cream and the Divas Magazine***

Batista:
You have it old man maybe it'll help you not get any kind of herpies see ya later!!!!

***Batista leaves the room and sees Shawn Stasiak having an interview with Kevin Kelly for his match against Go-D***

Kevin Kelly:
Shawn Stasiak in 2 days you'll be able to become the Hardcore and European Champion I just wanted to know how do you feel??

Shawn "Planet" Stasiak:
Well I'll tell ya how I feel Kelly I am going to become the Hardcore and European Champion and show this entire fed that I am the greatest athlete this fed has ever witnessed I am going to give Go-D A One Way Ticket To Planet Stasiak!!!!! and after that I will.......

***Batista gets face to face with Stasiak and says....***

Batista:
Listen hear Stasiak I don't care who wins this Sunday Night and I don't care if you are a great champ or any shit like that the only thing I care about is that Hardcore Title if you win then expect for THE SIN TO BEGIN this Sunday Night if you win those 2 titles!!!!! And this doesn't mean I made my mind to become a RAW Brand Superstar this only means keep that title warm Ugly Man and keep it warm cause as soon as I see your ugly ass with those 2 titles or Go-D the Sin will really begin just remember that asshole see you then!!!!!!!

***Batista leaves Stasiak stunned as the show goes to a commercial Break***

Tekken 4
McDonalds
WWF 2K3 Royal Rumble
Snickers
Subway

***The Show begins showing the Titantron and it shows Batista both giving Chris Jericho and Dynamite FALL FROM GRACES and pinning them to become an unstoppable menace and showing how all the crowd reacted when he finshed them off with his awesome Powerbomb***

***It shows the big man celebrating as all of a sudden the Titantron blurs and Batistas music blares over the arena as the Big Man walks down to the ring as the crowd hold up Banners***


***Batista holds the mic up to his as he has a crazy eyed look and stares at the fans***

Batista:
Well Well fans as I was saying if I don't win the rumble which I know I am going to win then I am going to be going for the Hardcore Title but thats in the future okay lets see The Royal Rumble is this Sunday Night and we got asswipes that are going to be in it a couple of alright guys and a couple of the guys you wanna fight and lets face it I wanna elliminate each and every freak in the Rumble so I am going to talk a little bit about each wrestler participating in it and First we start off with Kane the big red machine etc..etc..etc well Kane you are by far one of the strongest wrestlers here by far and I respect your strenght really I do you are a champion but on Sunday Night no hard feelings but I will elliminate your ass, Then theres Go-D double Champ wowy if this guy beats Stasiak by some miracle he'll be owning up to me thats if I don't win this but I will, Jeff Hardy I've always found you to be a little bitch with great skills but don't get me wrong your a great wrestler but I will elliminate your ass to, Shawn Stasiak you ugly freak I hope you win against Go-D which is more than I could say when you face me in the ring Sunday Night I will get you out bitch, HBK you old piece of shit you have no chance against me so keep dreaming and wet your pants a lil' more cause your a nobody, Sting now heres a wanker who knows how to wrestle but he won't beat me thats for sure, Jeff Jarret a slapnuts who plays with his nuts no challenge there, HHH a stupid idiot thinking he will become a champ his never been nothing and never will be nothing, Edge where are my edge heads well they won't be with you when I elliminate you, Matrix Triple H wannabe nothing else I could really say then your ass is grass, Ness a pint size bitch who really ain't a challenge, Kidman a big nosed dick who can't wrestle even in cruiserweight standards, Y2J a hasbeen in his words and nothing that won't be a challenge, The Dudley Boyz are not gonna win this Sunday and they sure ain't gonna win the rumble, Dreadnaight I don't know who the guy is but he doesn't sound like a pushover might be some work!!!, Cash Money what a stupid name won't talk about him just that I will elliminate his ass, Rock I hate him thats all I can say and I promise to elliminate his ass out of the rumble, Stiener just another freak with steroids pumping through his muscles not enough of a challege, Bret Hart nothing now and considered dead by me just won't be a challenge, Crazy Kid another kid who can't wrestle and trys to stay like Edge sorry kid I'm not gonna waste my time on you, The NWO I have nothing against you but I will elliminate all your asses, Booker T I don't know why you are hanging out with Goldust and his bitch but I will elliminate you none the less, Kurt Angle this guys a great athlete but theres one thing about him He Sucks!!!, Undertaker a tobacco spittin old man who doesn't impress me the least and won't be a challenge, Dynamite I bet you and there was no challenge there, Randy Orton another idiot won't make it big at all, Lance Storm all canadian but doesn't impress me your skills are old and weary and I will make sure you are out, Johnny Wilde don't know you but you suck, Goldust only one word describes you your fffffffffff gay, Lesnar another challenge but not good enough, RVD not a challenge lets move on, The Wall another tell guy who stands in my way I will be sure to elliminate that guys ass, Dreamer you suck stick that singapore cane where it belongs and don't bother showing up at the rumble, D.V.V Well Donaven your fat ass is gonna be ellimited by me I will kick your ass Donaven and show you that I can beat you Donaven, My next opponent is the cat napper the asian who eats to many cats and chokes on the furballs yes its none other that Saki Saki $5 I'll tell you what xXx stands for it stands for X-Stupid,X-Queer and X-Fucking Retard in stepping in the ring with me in it and I will proove it to you when I elliminate you, Jamie Noble another cruiserweight thats gonna be no challenge at all, T.P.W don't even start it probably stands for The Petifile Women I will elliminate you to, Shane Douglas your franchise scheme doesn't make you any good at wrestling than seeing other idiots wrestle I'll get you out for sure, Jace Pittman stupid idiot, The Kid and Wint 2 gaybos from diamonds are forever fuck off you fucks, S-I-N a wrestler who I admire you are a fuckin xtreme cunt and it'll be a pleasure in elliminating you, Nathen Jones now when I think queer as folk I think of this guy good luck cause your gonna need it when I get you out, Macho Man an old cunt whose days are over and frankly I don't care if he was the best in the stone age but now the age needs wrestlers like me and I will elliminate his ass, And lastly Tornado a Vampiro wannabe well Tornado be prepared cause I will elliminate your ass very soon!!! And to all my opponents that I face at the Rumble let me just say this.......

LET THE SIN BEGIN!!!!!!

***Batista slams the mic as the crowd cheer Batista,Batista,Batista,Batista, and Batista raises his arm and claps at the fans in appreciation he walks out of the ring as Coach is waiting for Batista in the ramp***

Coach:
Batista this Sunday you face about 30 men in the WWF 2K3 Royal Rumble and you are one of the favorites to win on Sunday Night so what do you think do you think that you will indeed become the 2003 Royal Rumble Winner???

Batista:
Of Course I will I am awaiting all my opponents and I sure as hell will show all that I am capable of winning I am a force to be reckoned with!!!!!

Coach:
Also I have heard rumour that you might be joining RAW is this true and why??

Batista:
I'm thinking about it but no decision yet so don't ask shit!!!

Coach:
One more question you have many fans over the world and I just wanted to know who is gonna win at the Rumble DDP or Crazy Man??

Batista:
Well I think Crazy Man has a chance but you never know I gotta go prepare!!!!

Coach:
Thanks for your time Dave!!!!

***The Show goes to a Commercial Break*** END TRANSMISION.....