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The Odd Couple

 

Starring: Jon Kellar, Kev Mania, Dyna Might, Sean O'Gara

 

~Our somber scene opens in a hospital room where Dyna is lying in bed unconscious, her forehead bandaged up. Kellar is sitting by her bedside holding her hand, his head buried in the covers next to her, the Extreme Heavyweight Title draped over a chair in the corner~

“Don’t give this mother f*cker one damn thing, Jon!! GO TO HELL YOU PIECE OF SH*T!!!”

~Kellar raises his head towards the sky~

Zander almost smiles as he reaches in and pats the side of Dyna’s face but then quickly grabs the steel chair from Damien and…. SMASHES THE STEEL CHAIR STRAIGHT INTO DYNA’S FACE!!!!!!

~Kellar shakes with rage, then drops his head back towards Dyna. We cut to outside where Sean O'Gara is standing and waiting as Kev comes with a tray of coffee~

Kev: How is he?

Sean: Take a wild guess...

Kev: Well I got him a coffee... maybe he'll appreciate it.

~Sean opens the door slightly and leans in, seeing several full cups of coffee sitting on the table by the bed. It is obvious Kellar has not touched them, and Sean closes the door~

Sean: I doubt the 26th time will be any different Kev...

Kev: Is he still mad at us?

Sean: I don't know, he hasn't said a word for almost a day.

Kev: Did you explain to him about being locked in that room?

Sean: Yeah, but I don't think he wanted to hear it. Besides, we did try to make that up to him. You got involved in that mega-brawl and I saw Dyna to the hospital safely. Not a lot more we could've done to be honest.

Kev: I doubt Jon sees it that way.

Sean: Give him time, the doctor's said she'd be fine and that she just needs to sleep if off now. Jon's just on a guilt trip right now over what happened.

Kev: You think he'll give Zander the title shot now? 

Sean: Well bearing in mind the ban on a rematch is in writing and due to insurance reasons I doubt he can give Zander the rematch, even if he wanted to, which I doubt he does to be honest. Plus Dyna told him not to.

Kev: Since when has Jon ever done what Dyna told him? 

Sean: You have a point... but in any case you and I can't stay here.

Kev: Huh?

Sean: We've got a match a week on Sunday. You and me versus two of Zander's so called "misfits"

Kev: NeCro?

Sean: Nah, different ones. There was some mention of a Daft Angel and  Sex up North... I wasn't listening. So it could be anyone from Zander's

Kev: Including NeCro?

Sean: No not him. GZW doesn't see the money in two retarded sidekicks going head to head... come on.

~We cut to the two of them driving along a road towards Sean's Japanese apartment about 1/2 an hour later~

Kev:...

Sean:...

Kev: Oh ha ha! I just got that... you're about as funny as hemorrhoids, you know that?

Sean: See now I find hemorrhoids pretty funny...

Kev: What?

Sean: So long as I'm not the one with them I think they provide for very amusing jokes.

Kev: See you and I are VERY different people...

Sean: And for that I thank the Holy Mother and our lord Jesus Christ.

Kev: Hey!

Sean: ...though I'm glad to hear that you admit that you are in some way "different" from normal. First step to curing yourself is knowing you have a problem.

Kev: I'd hardly classify you as normal Sean, and anyone who has seen you wrestle would agree with me...

Sean: What's wrong with the way I wrestle?

Kev: Nothing...

Sean: Then what's your point?

Kev: The fact that your wrestling C.V. reads the following when you look under "style": 'Would rather kill self playing lemmings off of any remotely high structure than lose a match."

Sean: Hey, you and Kellar work the mat, and that works for you. Great! I work the air, and that's what works for me ok?

Kev: Yeah, I remember it working so well in that ladder match you had with Rob Grayson back in UCW for the Internet title when you decided that it was more productive to make a Sean O'Gara-shaped hole in the ring than grab the belt that was right above you...

Sean: Kev, are you wearing your seatbelt?

Kev: No... wh..?

~Sean slams the brakes on and Kev smacks his head on the glove compartment, Sean then accelerates hard and Kev flies backwards into his seat~

Kev: Yeah well... I was asking for that I guess.

Sean: And then some... now let's get moving, we've got to break the "intoXication" out of mothballs and see if we can still hit it without killing anyone... well... except for Zander's buddies anyway.

Kev: I thought that move was outlawed after that guy...

Sean: Only in America... and we're in Japan. Besides, it's not as if anyone remembers that incident.

Kev: Especially the guy we hit with it... I mean he couldn't even remember his own name.

Sean: Neither can I... he didn't exactly have an illustrious career.

Kev: I heard it was only one match..

Sean: Well, I'll say it before and I'll say it again.... s<bleep>t happens.

Kev: Well that is what our lawyer told his mother anyway...

Sean: If it's good enough for an American court, it's good enough for me. Let's go.

~They both laugh as the car speeds away~