Back to the grind.
::Neil and Gideon are walking to the place they are going to cut their next promo. On the way they are talking……::
Gideon: I have to ask Neil What the hell happened?
Neil: What are you talking about?
Gideon: I understand you jumping Willie and getting me DQd. I’m surprised you were on good behavior that long.
Neil: I actually jumped Willie? Shit I must have been more drunk then I thought.
Gideon: You are kidding right?
Neil: Seriously G. Between the Painkillers after the bar fight Sunday evening and the case of beer I don’t remember half the shit that happened Monday.
Gideon: You don’t remember the Gauntlet match?
Neil: Had one hell of a headache. Saw the bruise on my forehead and assumed some son of a bitch hit me with a chair.
Gideon: ……… WOW… Neil I don’t know how to tell you didn’t do much that match but the real eye opener was the beautiful Springboard Leg Drop on Hughes.
::Neil laughs his head off.::
Neil: You’re shitting me G.
Gideon: Nope I’m not. I saw that and said "What the F#$k was that?!".
Neil: You are screwing with me right?
Gideon: Nope.
Neil: A springboard legdrop?!
Gideon: Yup.
Neil: And I actually hit the F$%kin thing too?!
Gideon: Yup. Beautiful move as well.
Neil: I’ll be damn.
Gideon: Have you still got the pill bottle?
::Neil reaches in his jacket pocket and passes the bottle to Gideon. Gideon starts reading it.::
Gideon: Codeine AND Morphine!?! Good god this could tranquilize a mountain lion Neil!
Neil: Kinda wondering why I wasn’t feeling any pain from the bar fight. Getting a chair cracked over your back and being driven through the men’s room door isn’t something I usually shake off that quick.
Gideon: I’m surprised you weren’t out. See those little words "Do not take with Alcohol"?
Neil: Hell even the morning paper say "Don’t take with Alcohol" these days Gideon. You get a 15 minute long guilt trip by the religious wackos who think it is some kind of a sin to drink if you get a beer at a restaurant. Hell even God drank. You think all that shit with the wine and him turning the Red Sea to wine was a coincidence?
Gideon: Remind me to cancel a few of the charity events down south. There is no way I’m wading through THAT much hate mail when you offend the Catholic church again.
Neil: You mean you never thought about all the Church functions that require wine before?
Gideon: Why do you think I’m a Taoist?
Neil: I assumed it was one of those martial arts BS things to keep the ole Sensei happy.
Gideon: That too.
::They arrive and Neil sees that the number of the building matches the one Gideon wrote out. 1745 West coast drive. It is an old Catholic Cathedral.::
Neil: No F$%kin way!
Gideon: It is a very nice church.
Neil: You remember the last time I was to a church.
Gideon: Yes Mike’s (Hegstrand) funeral.
Neil: The time before that.
Gideon: Of course I do. I had the honor of escorting Stephanie to the alter during your wedding.
Neil: The time before that.
Gideon: Rick (Rood/Rude).
Neil: Two funerals and a wedding. And if it wasn’t for it being my wedding I wouldn’t have been there.
Gideon: We are only cutting a promo here Neil. If you were going for confession I’d clear your commitments for about a month.
Neil: So what the hell are we doing here?
Gideon: A Eulogy. It should be entertaining.
Neil: All I can say is I’m glad it is sunny out. One of these days God is going to nail you with a lightning bolt.
::Gideon smiles.::
Gideon: We can’t all be rolemodels.
::Gideon goes around the room making sure everything is a go. Gideon goes to the Pulpit and Neil stands beside him. They are given the countdown.::
Gideon: We are gathered here today to remember the careers of 3 of Core’s former stars. Men whose lives were forever changed by the arrival of the greatest tag team in wrestling history. I would like to take a moment of silence for the wrestler Ryan Warren known better to the Core fans as Genocide.
::Gideon bows his head. Neil smirks as he bows his head.::
Gideon: The career of the man known as Genocide was ended very tragically though not as tragic as the actual career itself. Here was a man through mediocre intelligence and a rudimentary grasp of the most basic wrestling holds managed to get a contract in Core on sheer for lack of a better term "Hossitude".
Neil: Big dumb F#$ker.
Gideon: Then there is the less PC shortened version that Neil used. November 9th there was a death. The hopes and the dreams of Ryan Warren died that day. His wrestling career cut short by the most feared and dangerous move in wrestling today the Fracas Driver. It is a move out of the sick mind of Neil Whittaker a move so violent and sadistic I had to get permission from my lawyers for him to even use it.
::Neil turns his head to the side and spits.::
Neil: Fucking jackass was a waste of my time.
Gideon: That brings us to Twisted Reality. You are a tag team that has never teamed before against the most dominant tag team in wrestling. You might be like William Tremaine and doubt our skill. You might have thought that the loss against the Underachievers was something special. The truth of the matter is simply this we back up what we say in the ring.
Neil: You think it is a coincidence the Great British Heroes took off?
Gideon: We came to Core not as rookies but as dangerous men with both skill and the relentless drive to win at any and all costs.
Neil: When we came in Alex Caine left like a bitch. We faced the GBH and punked them out. Now that we aren’t going to have to face The Underachievers week after week this might be some fun to go after the tag belts.
Gideon: We didn’t physically end the careers of the GBH but we destroyed their confidence. Their career in Core died when they faced us. They knew that they were so hopelessly out matched by Neil and I. They knew they didn’t stand a chance. It is the wrestling equivalent of a dog chasing a bus. Not only is it not possible the poor dog chasing the bus is a poodle at best and likely not even male. May we have a moment of silence for the careers of the GBH in Core.
::Gideon bows his head. Neil snickers not even bothering to bow his head.::
Gideon: So ends their 15th minute of what should have ended at 3 minutes. Twisted Reality you are facing the Alliance. We have made the name feared in every federation we have competed. We have hoarded the tag gold like a miser counting quarters. Some people may say what we have done before Core doesn’t matter and they are right to a degree.
Neil: It matters to the poor son of a bitches we face.
Gideon: Experience is very important. With Neil in the ring there are no surprises. Well excluding the springboard legdrop on Smash.
Neil: I even hit the F$%king thing when I was drunk. When there is gold on the line I’m dead serious and an evil sadistic son of a bitch.
Gideon: As for myself I considered being a lawyer so you know I’m the type of man that thrives on creating misery in his fellow man.
Neil: Should have went into country music.
Gideon: I am not that evil yet.
::Neil pops the cork on a bottle of Sacramental wine and starts drinking it. Neil looks at it in disgust.::
Neil: Hell with the wine. No wonder the French are such wusses. I can feel my testicles shrinking after drinking this swill. Next prophet that updates the bible better remember the change over from Sacramental wine to Sacramental beer.
Gideon: I think Neil drinking the Sacramental wine is a good time to end it. Anyone with hate mail send it in care of Eugene Fitzpatrick at Core wrestling.
::The promo ends shortly after when Neil and Gideon walk away.::
Neil: You know we are going to get shit for that Gideon.
Gideon: Please. As if Eugene doesn’t get 7 bags of hate mail a day already. All we are doing is adding a paltry 1-2 more bags to the pile.
Neil: Works for me. Let’s get some beer. I have to wash that swill out of my mouth.
Gideon: Have you considered soft drinks?
Neil: Yup but cracking a guy in the back of the head with a plastic bottle just isn’t the same.
Gideon: You need to work on your people skills more Neil.
::The Alliance are walking away while shooting the breeze with more meaningless small talk.