Stone Cold Having A Beer

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(the scene starts at the sold out arena in Phoenix, Arizona where WWF/WCW RAW will take place., Michael Cole is standing in the center of the ring with a microphone at hand, the crowd is in good voice as they chant, 'WHAT' and hold up signs about their favorite or most hated WWF/WCW superstars, some of them read - 'I Want Puppies', another reads, 'Screw The Game' and another, 'R V D!'. Michael Cole raises his hand and the crowd silences down...)

Michael Cole: Hello i'm Michael Cole and yes, next to me stands one of the 4 competitors in just one of 3 huge RAW Main Events, Stone Cold Steve Austin. Stone Cold, we know you want to get even with The Rock. But, The Rock isn't the only man in this match tonight. What are your feelings on John Cena? (Crowd: What!?)

"Austin 3:16": You wanna know my feelings?..(Crowd: What!?)..Stone Cold will tell you his feelings. You see, Vince and Shane they try and hold me back. They TRY and hold Stone Cold back from whoopin somebody's ASS! But Michael..(Crowd: What!?)..it doesn't really matter this week..(Crowd: What!?)..You see I have a chance to whoop two guys asses at once. Michael.. I'm going to take that chance.. and I'm gunna get a 'Steve-Wiser' out.. Toast their SORRY ASSES..Stone Cold Stun 'em..1..2..3 thats the first victim of The Rattlesnake..(Crowd: What!?)..And it ain't gunna be the LAST!

Michael Cole: John Cena seems to be very confident going into this match against you? Do you think John Cena stands a chance?

"Austin 3:16": John Cena, the ugliest son of a bitch I have ever seen! Did your mommy drop you on your head? WHAT?!? Are you retarded! WHAT?!? You ARE NOT Vanilla Ice, ya sorry son of a bitch! You run your ass down to the ring, moanin out what you call a freestyle, dancin around the ring like the jackass you are and expect to be the best? (WHAT?) You think your special? (WHAT?) John Cena Stone Colds gonna take that mic and chain of yours and shove them straight up your ass and and he's gonna gut kick you, Stunner..1..2..3!!(WHAT!?) Well look son, I'm "STONE COLD" STEVE AUSTIN, THE WCW's FAVORITE BEER DRINKER!. What the hell are you? WHAT? A confused white boy who thinks he can rap? WHAT? Is that supposed to impress me? Well it doesn't! It sucks! Just like you! WHAT? You suck you pathetic jackass! WHAT? Your pathetic! WHAT? Your a jackass! You goofy son of a bitch! Hit Stone Cold with the FU? EH EH! You lil' mealy mouthed bastard if you EVER WHAT? AGAIN! WHAT? If you ever stick your lil' nose in my business again I'll stomp a mud hole in ya ass and walk that sum bitch dry! WHAT?

"The Rattlesnake" Stone Cold Steve Austin: I looked at the RAW card and I said Steve! WHAT!?I said Stone Cold WHAT!? 3:16 WHAT!? The Rattlesnake WHAT!? The Bionic Redneck WHAT!? I asked myself, I said Stone Cold! WHAT!? That's what I said! WHAT!? Why can't the WWF/WCW get some real superstars asses for you to kick! WHAT? I said John Cena? WHO THE HELL IS THAT? WHAT?! Vanilla Ice's son? Does that make him special! WHY? Cuz his old man was a lip singer! WHAT? Is that supposed to impress me? Well it doesn't. Let me ask you somethin' son. How many titles have you won? WHAT? How many you dumb son of a bitch! NONE! WHAT? Zero! WHAT? Zip! WHAT? Notta! WHAT? You suck! Look at ya! Your pathetic! With your big chain! Is that supposed to make ya look pretty? WHAT? Stacy Kiebler! WHAT? Stacy! Not you! WHAT? Your ugly! WHAT?

"The Bionic Redneck" Steve Austin: I'm not close to done! WHAT? Not even near finished! WHAT? I got a while to go! So let's start tonight! WHAT? Tonight! WHAT? Right here tonight! WHAT? I'll start right here in Phoenix! WHAT? And we should start by doing one simple thing! WHAT? Just one simple thing! WHAT? A simple thing! WHAT!? One thing! WHAT? How about... WHAT? ...we just have a beer? WHAT? A bruski! WHAT? A drink! WHAT? Some alcohol! WHAT? Not tequila! WHAT? Just beer! WHAT? A Budweiser! WHAT? Not a Coors! WHAT? I only drink some Budweiser! WHAT? You want some Budweiser? WHAT? Give me a HELL YEAH if you want some Budweiser! HELL YEAH!! That's what I thought! WHAT? So we're gonna drink a beer together! WHAT? And we're not gonna fight each other! WHAT? Sound good? WHAT? Does it sound good? WHAT? Is it registering in your brain? WHAT? Does it click upstairs? WHAT? Are all the parts working? WHAT? Because if they are, give me another HELL YEAH! HELL YEAH! And the only reason that we're gonna be drinkin', and not fighting is because... WHAT? That's the Bottom Line... WHAT? I said, that's the Bottom Line... WHAT? Because Stone Cold Said So! 

"The Texas Rattlesnake" Stone Cold Steve Austin: I came out here tonight to say officially, that Stone Cold Steve Austin is back! WHAT? And I also came out here tonight to bag on two retarded jackasses! WHAT? And I mean, The Rock! WHAT? The Ladies Man?!? WHAT? The Great One... WHAT? And John Cena... WHAT! Vanilla Ice's son... WHAT? That fake chain wearin, rappin, pathetic son of a bitch! WHAT? They're wackos! WHAT? Loonies! WHAT? Idiots! WHAT? Imbiciles! WHAT? Pathetic! WHAT? Losers! WHAT! They don't amount to anything! WHAT? Nothing! WHAT? And that's why Stone Cold Steve Austin came out here to call one of them out right now if they got the guts! WHAT!? If they have the intestinal fortitude! WHAT? If they have the balls! WHAT? If they have the brains! WHAT? But it's okay if they don't show up out here right now, because I would just hop outta this ring! WHAT!? Walk my ass up that ramp! WHAT!? Walk it into the backstage area... WHAT!? and precede to whip the crap outta two pathetic home-grown jackasses! WHAT!? But I also wanna talk about someone else! WHAT!? This man is a man in my way! WHAT!? An obstacle! WHAT!? A roadblock! WHAT!? His name...WHAT!? is...WHAT? The Rock! WHAT? That Hollywood, nursery rhymin' retard! WHAT? Mr. Hollywood ! WHAT? Rock if I see your lil ass walkin around backstage I'ma stun you, you son of a bitch! And that's the Bottom Line...WHAT? And that's the Bottom Line... WHAT? I said, and that's the Bottom Line...WHAT? Because Stone Cold...WHAT? Stone Cold...WHAT? Me...WHAT? Said So!