Stone Cold Having A Beer

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This role-play was written and is owned by Me <mailto:rednblack2k2@aol.com>. All HTML and images are property of me, or are being used with permission. This role-play has been written for the WWF e-fed and nothing contained in it is to be taken seriously. This role-play contains some inappropriate themes, languages, and other content. If you do not wish to see or read any such thing, click the X in the upper right-hand corner. This role-play has taken a lot of time and effort to create so please don't steal anything off of this page. So sit back, grab some snacks, and enjoy!
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:.: Scene # 1 :.:

scene starts at a upper-class restaurant which only the rich could afford to eat, the camera pans around the restaurant to show all the woman are dressed up in their evening gowns and the waiters are dressed like "penguins", the camera zooms round to show that the UNDISPUTED CHAMPION, Steve Austin is eating with his wife Debra. They are talking about the wrestling business while sipping expensive glasses of wine..)

:.: "Mrs. Rattlesnake" Debra:.: - "Hunny, can you believe that bitch Stacy Keibler calling me a bimbo ?!?"

:.: Austin 3:16 :.: - (laughs) "Unreal! So I guess what she is saying is, that your the slut and she isn't? WHAT? That long-legged son of a bitch is gonna pay WHAT? Don't no one talk about my wife and get away with it EH EH!"

:.: Debra :.: - "That's what it sounds like. But no worries, I mean who's gonna beat us? (laughs)"

:.: Austin 3:16 :.: - "That goofy bastard The Rock keeps flappin his gums about he's gonna do this to me, and this to me. Let me ask you something Rock. WHAT? Let me ask you a question. WHAT? Inquire you. WHAT? I want to ask you somethin you dumb son of a bitch? Do you think your special? WHAT? Do you think your cool? WHY? Becase when you talk, it rhymes? WHAT? You think your Dr. Suess? WHAT? Green Eggs and Ham? WHAT? Your the results of a one night stand! WHAT? WHAM BAM THANK YOU MA'AM! WHAT? Your pathetic you piece of shit!"

:.: Debra :.: - " Yeah and Skanky opps I mean Stacy, I'm going to kick your slutty ass all over the ring on RAW!!!"

:.: 3:16 :.: - "Well I guess all we have left to do now is win."

:.: Debra :.:- "Don't worry baby, I'm sure we will win"

:.: 3:16 :.: - "Yeah but just in case, we should practice "pinning and holds" later tonight, WHAT? I think we should knock boots! WHAT? Perform sexual favors on each other! WHAT? Foreplay! WHAT? We should have hot sweaty animal sex! WHAT? WHAT? WHAT? Dammit I'm thirsty can I get a beer in here! WHAT?"

:.: Debra :.: - "He he"

:.: 3:16 :.: - (laughs) "Ok, ok. So seriously who do you think is going to be the hardest opposition in the fed? WHAT? These goofy sons of a bitches that think they have a shot! WHAT? They are pathetic!"

:.: Debra :.: - "I dunno? Maybe Kurt (laughs) by the way I wonder how his head is doing?"

:.: 3:16 :.: - (laughs) You know, he needs to stay out of my business. I'm going to break his fucking neck, no one, and I mean NO ONE sticks their nose into my business and gets away with it. EH EH!"

(an attractive waitress walks past and Steve is distracted by the beauty of the waitress)

:.: Debra :.:- Steve what the hell are you looking at??

:.: 3:!6 :.: - "A man can look can't he? Anymore champagne?"

:.: Debra :.: - "No but a man can sleep on the couch tonight"

:.: 3:16 - "WHAT?, I thought we were gonna practice are pins and holds? WHAT? I thought we were gonna fuck!"

:.: Debra :.: - "The only thing you will be holding tonight is the check"

:.: 3:16 :.: - (flaging down the waitress) "Waitress!! Debra why don't you go wait in the car, I have to make a few closing statements to the camera."

:.: Debra :.: - "Fine, I'll see you outside"

:.: 3:16 :.: - "To be honest there is no big secret, what you have to do is let all these guys that run their mouth just do that. Let them go on and on and on how good they are and much they are going to hurt you. WHAT? Just let them flap their gums. WHAT? Shoot the breeze! WHAT? Bullshit! Because the more they say, the more determined you become to beat their ass. And the more determined you become... the more twisted and dangerous you become WHAT?"

(Steve looks straight into the camera)

:.: 3:16  :.: - "That is what exactly happens. You see where Tazz went wrong is that he thought he could intimate me, WHAT? He thought that in bad mouthing me that it would scare me. WHAT? Startle me! WHAT? Frighten me! WHAT? EH EH! Not happenin you goofy son of a bitch! But all he will get is a real ass-kicking. I'm going to destroy him, it will be great won't it? You see I am the best damn wrestler there is today but jackasses WHAT? Morons. WHAT? Idiots! WHAT? Assholes! Like Tazz, Angle, and Edge just can't understand that you can't beat the invincible. Oh I almost forgot...WHAT? It slipped my mind! WHAT? I forgot! WHAT? Dammit! Y2J if you ever, EVER come into my business again I'll beat you so hard that it will be a while before you come sniffing round me again. WHAT?"

(Austin stares deeper into the camera)

:.: 3:16 :.: - " Now turning my attention to THE ROCK! WHO? DR. SUESS! WHO? THE BRAHMA BULL! WHO? That goofy son of a bitch runnin around tellin nursery rhymes! He thinks he is some kind of big shot, WHAT? he thinks that when he opens his mouth people actually listen. WHAT? He thinks he's funny... WHAT? Special! WHAT? He's pathetic! He has to realize that he is a nobody in this federation, he is a man that nobody respects and nobody pays attention to him. WHAT? You suck! Did you see that promo that he did in which he said that I was afraid of him? Ha ha!! He showed his stupidity when he said that he had lost any remaining respect he had for me, does he honestly think that I give a damn whether or not he respects me? WHAT? I don't give a damn! WHAT? A rat's ass! WHAT? A flying fuck! There hasn't been a day since I joined this federation that I had any respect for anyone here. This guy does not even concern me in the slightest never mind scare me. You can not scare a man that has seen it all before. All the bitching and moaning that Rock does is nothing new. I am getting stronger and stronger and there isn't a thing that can be done about it.

:.: 3:16 :.:- (picks up the bill and calls over the waitress) Can you put this on my account please ma'am?

:.: Waitress :.: - "Of course, and your name is?"

:.: 3:16 :.: - "Mr. Steve Austin"

:.: Waitress :.: - "Of course"

(looking back at the camera)

:.: 3:16 :.:" - "Oh and Rock, Y2J, and Tazz and all you others Ill see at RAW!, remember one thing..

THAT'S THE BOTTOM LINE...

WHY?!?

CUZ STONE COLD SAID SO!!

(Austin walks out and the screen fades to black")

:.: SCENE # 2 :.:

The cameras are scurrying around backstage at HEAT looking for wrestlers making their entrance. One lucky camera spots The Undisputed Champion Steve Austin and his wife Debra! The cameraman motions to someone and Kevin Kelley comes running towards Steve and Debra.

"Kevin Kelley" - Stone Cold, Stone Cold, can I interview you and Debra please?

"Austin 3:16" - WHAT? Excuse me? WHAT? Pardon me? Do you got somethin to say? WHAT? You wanna flap your gums you son of a bitch! Well I'll be in the ring in 15 minutes so your pathetic ass can just wait til then. WHAT? Your pathetic! Look at ya. With your cheap suit. WHAT? Your ugly hair! WHAT? Your teeth are yellow! WHAT? Your a disgrace! WHAT?

[ Austin pushes KK out of the way as he and Debra continue you to walk down the hall and Austin is turned around talking to Debra. Y2J comes walking around the corner and he and Austin have a meeting of the brains! ]

"The Living Legend" Chris Jericho - Watch where your going you trailor park trash! WHAT? (mocking Austin]

" 3:16" - Who in the hell do you think you are? WHAT? Your not special! WHAT? You are a HAS-BEEN. EH EH! A never was you mealy mouthed bastard! Look at ya. With your shiny shirt, your long blonde hair, your empty waist! WHAT? Empty waist! WHY? Look at mine you dumb son of a bitch! WHAT?

"The Living Legend" - I AM NOT A HAS BEEN AUSTIN! You know it junior! I am a LARGER THAN LIFE LIVING LEGEND!

"Austin 3:16" - Your nothing bout a goofy son of a bitch!

[ Austin shoves Y2J out of the way as he and Debra walk past ]

Scene # 3

"Glass Shatters" by Disturbed hits the PA system as Stone Cold Steve Austin and Debra make their way out onto the entrance ramp! They make their way to the ring as Austin hands Debra his belt and he gets into the ring. He does his customary corner stops and he gets the mic from Lillian Garcia

[ Austin speaks up... ]

"3:16" - "Rock, how many times do I have to tell you to never ask me such stupid questions ever again... do you even understand plain English? I doubt it... WHAT? Your stupid! WHAT? Slow! WHAT? Dumb! You see, contrary to what you might be thinking, little girl, Stone Cold has been scouting his... (Austin uses his hands to symbolize the quote) ...'opponents' and I have never seen such a pathetic bunch of alleged wrestlers in my life. WHAT? They are pathetic! WHAT? They suck! I have been speechless at the absolute trash that WWF fans have been subjected to... WHAT? It's pathetic! WHY? You all suck! WHAT? Never in my years in this business have I seen the quality of my 'opponents' be of such a poor quality. How can you be scared of someone like The Rock? Y2J? Huh? I mean as we speak, They must be absolutely scared out of their minds at the prospect of Stone Cold stepping in the ring with them. WHAT? Scared shittless! WHAT? They are pathetic! You see these guys maybe big shots in their own insignificant dream worlds  but none of them has ever had to face me. They can run their mouths all they want, but when they step inside the square circle with the 'rattlesnake' they will realize that I am just too intelligent, too intense, too dangerous to let a bunch of sons of a bitches walk away with MY GLORY - the Undisputed WWF Championship. These assholes will experience first hand what it is like to feel pain that you never thought you could feel. I will conquer - make no mistake about that! WHAT? I will destroy every single one of those men that have the guts to face me. WHAT? I will spill their blood, WHAT? I will make them beg for mercy, but all that will do is make me more determined to inflict yet more pain upon them. Everyone of my opponents better bring everything they have got because if they want to stay alive, they will have to do that. But not for one second should they think they can defeat me, I am too intense, WHAT? too strong, WHAT? too damn dangerous to let some pack of motherfuckers get in the way of the 3:16. For years, I went around minor federations that were deemed never to come of anything that I would. Each federation finally submitted to the power of the 'Rattlesnake' and it 's only a matter of time until this fed does as well. The one thing that drives me even though I don't necessarily need to fight anymore - I've made my money, the one thing that keeps me going to the determination to achieve total domination. WHAT? Destroy the fed! WHY? They are all pathetic! WHAT? They suck! WHAT? This may only be the first minor step in that direction but it is a vital one and I intend to make ever use of it, no matter what anyone thinks or says... Stone Cold will prevail the victor from this because I say so...

WHY...

BECAUSE STONE COLD SAID SO!!!!