The 'ECE
.. Perhaps the greatest creation ever known to man .. and hell it's
here! and along with it, it's brought back many familiar faces. But
hell screw them because with it the ECE has brought to it none other
than the greatest wrestler ever to step foot inside of a wrestling
ring. Of course I'm talking about Bret Hart! Who else gets that
phrase put alongside their name. But then Bret Hart wakes up from
his dream. Sure Bret is great .. or at least was great .. But that
was then. This is now. But you see Bret can't seem to get that into
his enormous ego. Times have changed Bret, You aint' all that now.
But like I said .. Try telling him that? .. Hey Hell! Who knows..
perhaps Kurt Angle or Brock Lesnar could beat that message into him tonight
when the legends collide inside of the ece squared circle..
maybe not. Perhaps Bret really is as good as he used to be.. perhaps
he still is 'thee man' and who knows.. maybe he could even steal a
win come Smackdown just to prove to the fans, the new guys and most
importantly - Vince McMahon, that he really is the best there is, the best there was and
the best there ever will be.
So we are only a few hours shy of smackdown and already we have seen
our hero Bret hart snap under the pressure and destroy
one of the ece odd jobbers. But I mean who cares right. Bret hart is
a sick, twisted, jealous, egoistical maniac and he's going to carry
on being like this until he proves that he is the best! Will that
ever happen? Haha you can count on it! The scene opens up and we can
see a 'street corner' it's a dark night and you can tell we are
approaching winter as if you look up at the tree hanging over the
strip club you ca.. STRIP CLUB! Hell we're at a damm strip club. Oh
yeah baby it's time to party and get DIRTY! The pounding music
coming from inside pumps through the walls and can be clearly heard
a few blocks down. We don't really know why we've got a camera fixed
on this joint until an enormous range rover pulls up and out steps
none other than Canada's very own. Bret, Hitman Hart. Bret says
nothing as he gets out of the enormous vehicle. Bret then adjusts
his jacket before entering the hoe house. Our camera then fades to
black. Several moments later we have a camera inside. It pans around
the strip joint as we see hot topless exotic dancers here there and
everywhere. Just then something catches the cameraman's eye and he
quickly zoom in.. and we can see none other then Bret Hart sitting
in the corner all alone. He's not uttering one word and seems to be
getting a little pissed off.
Bret 'HITMAN'
Hart :
Damn! How hard is it to get some service around here!
Bret then stands up and grabs his coat. It looks like our hero is
about to leave. Hart storms to the doorway but then comes to a halt
all of a sudden. Bret then edges his ear towards three strippers who
are sitting, chatting in the corner of the club, preferably on their
break. Bret then takes a step closer and hides behind a pillar.
Obviously trying to listen in on their conversation.
Bernie
'STRIPPER' Fox :
Yeah that guy
was great. I mean did you see the build .. damm you got lucky there
lex, I would of given anything to of gotten it on with a customer
like that ... if ya know wha I mean?
The girls then chuckle and continue to chat amongst themselves. As
Bret Hart smiles.. does he seriously think they are talking about
him? Is he thick or something?
Alexis
'STRIPPER' Lucky :
And the size of
his thing.. Damm I don't even think that all of us girls would be to
much for him! .. I just wish I could remember his name!
Bernie
'STRIPPER' Fox :
Hehe your so
Lucky Lex!
Alexis
'STRIPPER' Lucky :
I know Foxy.. I
know!
Just then
the third stripper who just happens to be the nicest looking of the
three shoots to her feet and bends her head slightly .. Haha Bret
has been spotted. The girl then smiles as Bret's jaw drops. Haha
Bret feels a fool.
Krystal
'STRIPPER' Steal :
Hey Sweetie Pie!
.. Can I be of your service?
Bret
looks around as if to say 'who me?' But he knows exactly who's she's
taking to.
Bret 'HITMAN'
Hart :
Who Me?
De Ja Vu
be dammed. Haha would you look at Hart .. he's going bright Red..
The stripper then approaches Bret but he backs off. Haha Bret is
backing down from a Stripper! God help him come saturday night when
he meets Brock Lesnar and Kurt Angle!
Krystal
'STRIPPER' Steal :
It's okay hun!
I'm not gonna hurt you .. well not if you don't want me to..
The
stripper then smiles as she takes Bret by the cuffs .. Bret is as
nervous.. and you can clearly see this as he is sweating like Gary
Glitter would in a nursery (a kinder garden for all you American
folk) The stripper then thrusts her tongue into Hart's ear and rubs
her leg up and down Bret's. Bret seems o be enjoying it but then
backs off all of a sudden and shakes his head.
Bret 'HITMAN'
Hart :
NO!
Krystal
'STRIPPER' Steal :
What's wrong
sweetie? .. you don't like me?
The
stripper is clearly shocked by Bret's reaction to her coz' to be
honest he must be gay to turn down this fine peace of meat.
Bret 'HITMAN'
Hart :
KURT!
The name
'Kurt' comes to the other 2 girl's attention and it seems to ring
a bell.
Alexis
'STRIPPER' Lucky :
Hey that's the
guy!
Bernie
'STRIPPER' Fox :
huh?
Alexis
'STRIPPER' Lucky :
That's the guy
with the enormous shmachal!
Haha 'Schmachal'
that's a nice way to put it.
Krystal
'STRIPPER' Steal :
So bay bee .. do
you want some of me?
The hot
Hot HOT! Stripper then begins to un-do her bikini-like top as she
gets closer and closer to the Hitman! But Bret shoves her back in
disgust and at the top of his voice shouts...
Bret 'HITMAN'
Hart : I
WANT HER!
The whole
strip club then comes to a stand still as Bret holds out his finger
towards 'Lucky' the girl who sometime this week got it on with Kurt Angle! .. The stripper that was just hitting on kurt
seems quite upset and she slowly backs off and sits back down onto
the table..
Bret 'HITMAN'
Hart : So
am I getting you or not!?
Hart then
flashes the girls some cash.. and Lucky instantly shoots to her feet
and approaches Bret who clearly isn't liking this one bit. Why the
hell is he doing this? what exactly is going on? The stripper then
takes Hart by the hand and near enough drags him off across the
dance floor as the camera fades out.. But The camera then fades back
in almost instantly 'hmmmm that's weird' and we have got a focus on
some double doors. The camera then zooms up on the sign which hangs
above this door which reads.. 'love lounge' .. just then the door
barges open and out comes a happy smiling Bret Hart. And an even
more happier Alexis.
Bret 'HITMAN'
Hart : So
How was I Tuts?
TUTS?
TUTS? Did we just hear Bret Hart say tuts? has Bret gone soft? haha
He's probably in dream land.. he just got it on with one of the
hottest women the world has ever seen.
Alexis
'STRIPPER' Lucky :
Oh you were
excellent Bret.
Bret 'HITMAN'
Hart :
The excellence of execution might I add.
The
stripper looks confused for a slight second. but then almost
instantly begins to druel over the Hitman once again. Huh weird?
Alexis
'STRIPPER' Lucky :
You really are
.. The best there is .. the best there was .. and the best there
ever will be.
Bret 'HITMAN'
Hart : I
know .. I know..
Bret then
nudges the stripper out of the way .. and she looks disgusted but
doesn't really care. She is instantly approached by yet another
'gagging' customer and looks like she's gonna' get straight back to
work. Bret then gets right up close to the camera.
Bret 'HITMAN'
Hart :
Haha Kurt! You think your the big man around the ece! Well
we just found out who the REAL big man is. Not saying your small
kurt.. It's just your no-where near as big as the Hitman. And just
for the record kurt.. you never will be! .. and Just like I beat
you in Bed .. I will beat you in the ring come smackdown! ..
because I am the best there is .. The best there was and the best
there ever will be! and you Kurt...You Brock... You Vince.. EVERYBODY KNOWS IT!
The scene
then fades out with a sick close up of Bret Hart's sweaty smiley
face. Bret then sighs a sigh of a relief as he thinks that the
cameras is off .. but oh no .. we've got some sort of technical
error.
Pete
'CAMERAMAN' Waterman :
Hey Bret.. I've
got a slight..
Bret 'HITMAN'
Hart :
Ahh Keep it for someone who cares. I'm getting the hell out of here
before someone sees me.
Bret then
heads for the door but on his way the stripper that he just went
with grabs his arm.
Alexis
'STRIPPER' Lucky :
Aren't you
forgetting something Mr. Angle?
Bret 'HITMAN'
Hart : No
I don't think I... ANGLE!?!
Bret just
catches on! she just called him Mr. Angle! Is she referring to
Kurt Angle?!
Alexis
'STRIPPER' Lucky :
What are you
talking about Bret? I just want my money! I didn't say all that crap
for nothing you know
Bret 'HITMAN'
Hart :
You said Angle! Do you know him! ..
The
stripper seems rather confused.
Alexis
'STRIPPER' Lucky :
Ummmmm...
Bret 'HITMAN'
Hart : Do
you know Kurt Angle?
Alexis
'STRIPPER' Lucky :
As a matter of
fact I do.. Why do you ask? ahh forget it.. just give me my money
Bret or am I gonna have to call security .. a deal is a deal!
Bret 'HITMAN'
Hart :
Okay... Okay!
Bret then
pulls out his wallet with a rather smug look on his face.. He then
pulls out 4 50$ bills and hands them over to the stripper. The notes
light up her eyes with happiness.. Bret then sniggers before heading
off out of the strip club. The stripper then approaches the girls
(her fellow workers) who are still sitting in the exact same place
as they were earlier on. She flashes them the 200$ and their eyes
light up just like hers did literally seconds ago...
Bernie
'STRIPPER' Fox :
Wait a minute ..
that was very quick for 200$! What did you do? rob him?
Alexis
'STRIPPER' Lucky :
Haha! Let's just
say that's the quickest 200 dollars I've ever made .. and we didn't
even get dirty..
Bernie
'STRIPPER' Fox :
WHAT!?!
this time
the scene really does fade to black.. and Hahah Bret has been caught
red handed. He didn't' get it on with that stripper....
and worst of all it cost him 200$ for the ho to lie for him.. and
how unconvincing she really was .. How is he going to cope tomorrow night come smackdown
when him,Edge,Brock Lesnar, and Kurt Angle really , really
REALLY get it on....
- !
AND THE BEST THERE EVER WILL BE