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Record |
Achievments |
People Used |
People Mentioned |
RP # |
4-3-0 | Won gold medals in Sydney Olympics, track star at her university | Laura, Janice |
Matt Michaels |
Three/3 |
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Janice: Laura, how come you're such a jerk to other people? Laura: Because they aren't me. They don't know how I work, and, honestly, because they waste my time. Janice: So why are you nice to me? Laura: What? Janice: You're so nice to ME...why? Laura: I am? Well, (playing along, since Janice obviously doesn't realize Laura's a jerk to her as well) it's because I've gotten to know you since you've been around me everyday for the past number of years. Guess you just got lucky to be my roommate freshman year. Janice: So it was fate? Cool! Laura: If you say so. (rolls her eyes in head as she finishes off her cigarette and extinguishes it in the grass in front of her. After doing so, she sits up on her blanket and turns towards Janice, sitting so that her right leg is upright in front of her and her left leg crossing underneath. Janice rolls over on to her right side to face Laura.) Janice: Psyched up for those matches on Sunday I've seen. You can't stop talking about it! Laura: I just want to win is all, and I want everyone to know that. Janice: Matt Michaels seems rather pissed off that you think that way---and in how you think in general. Laura: You know, I saw that just before we drove out here for relaxing under the sun. He calls me a hypocrite? That's the best he can honestly do? That's really pathetic. For a man who has such a high vocabulary, all he can come up with for me is "hypocrite." What a douchebag. Janice: What you said before, that's history now. In fact, what ya just said here---that's history too! Matt Michaels says so! Laura: That's stupid. That's taking things too damn far. IS he right? Yes, but when we talk history, we mean long ago. I still hold to what said before that history doesn't mean a thing. Matt's wrong---I DON'T remember the moment I actually won my gold medals. I DON'T remember the ceremony and I DON'T remember putting them on for the first time. The only reason I know I won them is because I have video of my winning race and the fact I see my medals everyday. Otherwise, I'd have no idea I won them. Janice: How could you forget such an important event in your life?? Laura: In my life--emphasis on MY-- that was a petty event. I have so many things to worry about in today's world, for the future, that I have no time to relegate myself with anything that happened more than three months ago. If something happened that I should know, show me a videotape of it, otherwise I don't really care. I may bring up references, but that's only because they are down deep in the recesses of my memory and only come out into my accessible memory when I get pissed off, in order to help make a point. Watching Matt Michaels speak just makes me want to gouge my eyes out Oedipus-style. He makes listening a painful experience because everything he says comes out in a jumble of ignorance. Tell me, Janice, do I ever come out and say that my being a woman is a disadvantage yet, in the same respect, an advantage? Janice: All I hear you say is that you're trying just as hard as everyone else and that being a woman doesn't matter to you. Laura: (rather surprised Janice can recall this) Wow...you CAN recall even after doing all those joints. Now, you know how religious I am of course---(Janice nods)--HOW DARE HE BACK-TALK MY BELIEFS!! What he needs to get straight are his history definitions and the difference between those and religions. I am Catholic, that means I believe in God and that he makes what we are. I am NOT one of predestination belief. The difference is that predestination believes that God already knows what will happen and does everyone's bidding for them. My religion is that God creates you and guides you, but you do all the work, God helps you along the way, as no one, not even God, knows what will happen. But I'm sure Michaels is smart enough to that---or is he? (Laura raises an eyebrow for a second as she changes her position so that she is now on her knees, still facing Janice, and sitting on her heels.) This man talks on one road when his meaning is for a different road. It's so frustrating to listen to that it just makes me want to....to--- Laura: I'm sorry, but that's how frustrated I am. Janice: (wiping her mouth dry) I kinda liked it actually. Laura: (getting pushed over the edge with that remark) Shut up Janice! It's not like that had any love for you behind it like I'll give to later tonight-----I mean NOOOOOOO! Janice: HUH!? Laura: NEVER MIND!! Back to Matt Michaels. I still have a few problems with the guy. First off, he calls himself the "Founding Brother." Brother!? He's not black! Therefore, he is not a "brother," he is a "cracker." He's nothing more than Saltine, and from his act, he's got too much water on himself because he's swelling up like a motherf*cker. Secondly, he wants me to shut up. It's his own fault I'm talking in the first place. The guy is like an owner of a fat puppy dog. The owner says there's nothing that can be done about the dog's weight, then gives the thing a treat for NO reason! STOP FEEDING THE DAMN DOG! For Matt Michaels, if he wants ME to shut up---(she inhales and folks, check your glass appliances, this IS going to be high-pitched) WHY CAN'T HE SHUT UUUUP!!?? Janice: My gosh girl....calm down! Laura: I will if/when Matty there regains his senses for speaking. His take on history is as if history is one of the main components for life---Matt, how about these neat things called "air," "water" and "food?" History is not a basic life building block, so he should best drop it. Besides, my strategy already is working. I got ahead of him in the useless information department, and what was he left with? Practically nothing! Thus, out came the used-more-often-than-a-dinner-fork name calling of "hypocrite." Janice: You tend to be like that anyways though. Laura: NO I DON'T! Janice: Yes, you do. You always go and shoot down someone for something, then you go and do it. Laura: When I do it, it's okay! I'm Laura, and what I do is fine because it's ME doing it! If I killed someone, that'd be okay, I'm the one doing it! I say and do what I want WHEN I want because I CAN! What happened hundreds of years ago---doesn't concern me. What happens right now and what happens tomorrow DOES. If what happened all those years ago is what makes up what happens tomorrow? SO WHAT!? Is he saying that because I move my finger in a circle like this (draws five circles in the air with her right pointer finger) that, because of that action and that action alone I am going to, say, get in an accident tomorrow? That's asinine, and that's exactly what he's trying to say. Past actions make up what happens tomorrow--that's his aim in talking no matter how he may try to back up and cover his tail because he sees that I can out think him. As for outdoing him in the ring? It happened once---I had a great match and he didn't. Things don't look to be any easier with a third person in this matchup. If he's ready to think that this third person is a help, that's not the case. It's an extra person to watch for and an extra person to worry about pinning someone. I don't need help and I appreciate challenges like this. It lets me show up my opposition while at the same time giving me something new to wear. I get the chance to show two men at once instead of just the usual one. All the while NOT calling out for help due to my sex. I am a woman and I got here with help from God and my own hard work, not because some stupid laws were passed down long ago. Those laws have nothing to do with me even being here in the first place. If they never existed, I would STILL be here. Why? It's because I'm better than most men are in this business. It's because I win matches and get people to watch. I do things on television and in the ring that keeps audiences guessing. I don't go on and on and on about the past and I don't try to teach the viewers something. I do things, and if they like it, good, if not---that's fine, I really don't give a flying f*ck about them. Heck, the man isn't even in order with his own fiancee or whatever that chick he's with is supposed to be. For Pete's sake, why doesn't he sort this problem out first, then deal with the match? If means a week off, it means a week off. Christ, that's why I avoid relationships...men get so irritated over the smallest things...women are so much easier to get it on wi---NO! NO! NEVER MIND! It's her PARENTS for crying out loud! It's not like you have to gain approval of a celebrity! So they don't like you---flush into the sh*tter! Take their daughter and rape her all you want if that's what you want to do. Marry her, have consented sex even, go from there. You don't have to stay in touch with her parents, get a phone number that's unlisted and don't give the damn thing out. This is what this has come down to---me, Laura, giving out advice to a love-worn opponent. HOW SAD! I'm not Dr. Phil though, so if he screws up with Vicky, that's his problem and not mine. I'm TRYING to be nice...don't say I didn't care for a split-second. The bottom line is--Matt Michaels is an ass, I'm an asshole. He is okay, I am great. He is the Third World, I am the FIRST World. Anything different---is plain nonsense. Janice: Are you done? I thought we were going shopping today. Laura: We will, we will---but first off, I need a nap. I was up too late last night and it's SO nice out here. |
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