rumors archive

the mpw booking commitee held its monthly meeting a few nights ago and a few wrestlers were, lets just say pissed off, when they found out who they would be facing, and an interesting tidbit from this story is that rob kong will not be facing abrith for the rbfn title at enemas and animals as previously stated. so i guess we know who was pissed getting word that a twizted individual has expressed interest in joining mpw...happy birthday to funny freddy who will be turning 50 on july 19th...i hear that flaco might be back in time for enemeas and animals, but as for now the number twoooo man is selleck and he will be in the house to count to 2 and maybe even 3...another big story is that stoolie will most likely not be wrestling at enemas and animals. he is certainly feeling the effects of backyard wrestling and wants to take a month off...just wanna say whats up to tokyo ho buffer and vamp...mickey daygo, beautiful bobby's girlfriend and the flying asshole are vacationing in crackaslambad, wha wha whaaaaat...still unclear if broken end will be performing at enemeas and animals...until next time stay krazy

being a couple days removed of ...and justice for few 2002, i can still say i am speechless. 160 fans, 4 action packed matchs, a brutal performance from mutilated agony, wow, thats all i can say...a special thanks to ryan, cliff, danny, and the rest of the mutilated agony crew, hopefully we will see you in the yard again lets get down to business...whats this challenge rob kong is talking about? there was an incident after the main event, that involved abrith and daisy mae. it is unknown what management will do about this...crisis was almost involved in a fight with a fan in the holl e would fairgrounds parking out of the ordinary injuries to report, same old bruises, bumps, cuts, and so on...the kanabal/flawless kid/daisy mae match really impressed me and the fans...congrats to adaven for dethroning crisis of the little nutz title that he held for 13 months...i know of at least 4 people that wnat in mpw, i have met them and they seem very eager to start competing...blaque hart was backstage at ...and justice for few. he has posted on his site that he will wrestle at enemas and animals, but i have heard nothing of that sort yet...beautiful bobby has more nuts than brains...thanks to "selleck" for being a guest referee...a deal is in the works for broken end to play live at enemas and animals, lets hope so, because they are awesome...flaco will be absent from enemas and animals, unfortunately, he will be out of town...thats all for now, peace

lotsa stuff to cover so lets get into it...the card for uninhibited terror has been posted on the main page, however, word on the street is that agony may not be able to compete, since he was injured at 4:20. all angles aside i know this guy is one tough sonofagun and im sure he will make every effort to be at the show...happy birthday to holl e would who turned 17 a few days ago...i have personally seen adaven's new move: a handstand into a corkscrew legdrop. wow what an innovative move, this guy has some interesting stuff in his bag of tricks...i cant sleep, baby blue beanies will rape me... what is up with blaque hart??? look for paine's mpw career to alt at the end of the summer...crisis will be unable to attend uninhibited terror due to other obligations...congrats to kim ice, lori freidgen, and angie esquibel, you know them as krazy kim, daisy mae, and awesome angie. they will be graduating from clark high school on june 15th...rumors are that we will have live music from mutilated agony after uninhibited terror...where's 187??? look for mpw bumper stickers soon...peace out

i have alot to cover so lets get right into the thick of things...justice died here may go down as one of the most bloodiest events ever. rob kong immediately departed the fairgrounds after his match to get stitched up after being busted open by the corner of a mailbox. stoolie was cheese grated when broken end was closing the show. beautiful bobby was busted open by agony. daisy mae had her nose broken and was bleeding a little bit from it... speaking of broken end, they rocked as hard as ever and added an extra element of entertainment to justice died here. the mpw thanks them deeply for performing and hopes to see them at the fairgrounds again...representatives from the las vegas metropolitan police dept. showed up twice at justice died here, but the show went on...187 and blaque hart no showed. 187 because he has a broken collar bone from karmageddon and blaque hart because of personal reasons(if you'd like to know the real reasons, go to his website, there is a link to it on our homepage. i am declining to say why because i dont want the situation to get any worse by saying the wrong thing)...newcomer kannibul impressed me as well as the mpw fathers, i can see this guy going straight into main event is unknown if rob kong will be able to defend his world title at 4:20 on 4/20. he was schedualed to take on abrith, but who knows what will happen...the individuals from the uwf that invaded karmageddon are long gone, looks like we won...more news to come

happy new year. here we go with some more news...the biggest topic is where mpw will have its next show. i am pretty sure the holl e would fairgrounds are a thing of the past. but never fear, there is hope. 2 options are open right now. one of them i can not talk about, but the other one might be a possibility. the mpw is in contact with a pro wrestler, who wrestles for a promotion here in las vegas, to have shows at his place. the thing is, it cant happen until late february, early march, which is good and bad. see this would give the guys some time to rest, but i know them, they dont wanna rest. they are ready to go. so keep it tuned here for the latest info...the next show will definately be karmageddon and 3 matches are already set, and are listed on the main page...what is this "sic one" stuff all about???...there is a very disturbing image at the top of and was also on the violent night program...this new guy, tech n9ne, is a cool dude, the ladder at violent night was donated by him and he also was signed by mpw on the spot to fight beautiful bobby, to compensate for cancelled matches due to some wrestlers no showing...injuries at violent night: stoolie got a violent gash on his leg, raider's jaw had a meeting with a ladder. it was so bad that a pro wrestler said that seeing raider's injured jaw made him sick to his stomach(TIMMAY!!!). and of course all the other guys had the usual cuts, scrapes, and bruises...steve o is mia, no one has heard from him in a long while...i have heard that 187's "heart is not in it anymore", whatever that means. i guess he doesnt want to be part of mpw anymore, but this is just what ive heard and im sure he has his own story. i mean i hope he doesnt hang up the tacks and call it a career, 'cause he is still an asset...back soon with more news...I*C*E*

maximum jihad injury report
- stoolie and no ego are pretty banged up after their brutal match. no ego has a black eye and chewed up elbows form going through a sheet of glass and stoolie has multple cuts from barbed wire and a deep laceration on his leg
- beautiful bobby was cut open from a nice chair shot
- steve o and paine both busted open from glass
on to the news...
once again another great jam packed show put on by mpw last saturday, the 90+ fans loved it...looks like havoc and paine have parted ways since losing the double nut titles and will pursue singles careers...where was 187, when he should have been at maximum jihad? he still has not contacted mpw fathers but i will keep you updated on his whereabouts...blaque hart announced his retirement on his website last week, is he really retireing, because i've heard that he still has a month left on his contract and also has been considered for the main event at violent night...mpw might be searching for a new yard to hold live events as negotiations with holl e would, inc, are looking very anonymous source told stoolie the other day that mpw is the best entertainment in las vegas...corporal punishment is going around saying that he started mpw, so look for his life to end at the hands of either father dean, father hammock or father lenard, maybe all of them...the violent night card is posted on the main page and matches will be added as soon as i get them...PEACE

first off, lets get straight to the drunken stupor injury report...
-beautiful bobby was cut viciously on the back of his neck by a light tube
-stoolie has a 2 foot laceration from the back of his arm to about the middle of his back, from barbed wire
-agony suffered a cut on his forehead from being rammed into a shopping cart, but refused stitches
-daisy mae was smacked by steve o and got a bloody nose
-steve o was cut on the upper arm by a sheet of glass, same with xtc
-texas toast blew out his quad
-no ego has a bruised hip from an agony samoan drop, and a possible fractured wrist
-it looked like a dog chewed up paine's elbow, but it was from a burnt toast spinebuster through a sheet of glass
-raider blew out his hip early in the main event, but still managed to get in a few good shots on stoolie
drunken stupor saw a lot of bloodshed...

on to other news
-ok this shit is getting confusing, stoolie attacks no ego and agony at deliberate intent, but then sort of sides with agony in the closing moments of drunken stupor??? then no ego sides with raider who is friends with agony??? so this raises a few intriguing questions... are stoolie and agony allies? why did agony pin his friend raider to get the win at drunken stupor? who was the fan that attacked raider? is it the same guy that caused problems at deliberate intent? is he friends with agony? is raider still with agony? are waffles and omelets a good breakfast combo? where does no ego stand in all of this mayhem? is stoolie siding with blaque hart and turning on mpw? the answer is, i have no fucking clue. time will tell...
-here is the real scoop on devistation (or at least what ive heard), and remember, this is a shoot. devistation no showed deliberate intent. but you're saying to yourself, no ego and devistation took on paine and havoc for the double nut titles. yes they did, but it was xtc under the mask. so drunken stupor rolls around and devistation calls mpw booking committe (h. pee wee d.) and says he has to go to a homecoming dance, this all 2 hours before a show, and can't make the show. so the bottom line is this: (1)chuck thomas is not welcome in mpw anymore unless he really shows some heart and sucks up alot, and (2)ninja masks and tuxedos are very tacky and should not be worn to school dances. so now that devistation is ruined, i will bid you all farewell, and post more matches for bruised ass as they become available

first things first, today we celebrate the birthday of an mpw legend. yes this person had an immense impact on mpw. happy birthday to the girl that fought old school joe lewis at brawl 2k, or whatever event it was. actually its not that big of a deal, cuz now they are both gone(more on that later). also celebrating birtdays are raider on aug 12th, 187 on aug 18th, krazy kim on aug 27th and flaco on sept 1st, so happy birthday guys, and gal!!! MPW will be returning to action in mid september with "deliberate intent", and it looks like it will be beautiful bobby vs crisis for the little nutz seat. more matches will be announced soon...goodbye and thanks to old school joe lewis, who decided to retire from mpw to pursue other agendas...sources say funny freddy is not happy with flacos actions as vice-commissioner, "things have gotten out of hand in my absence" is what freddy says about the ego has challenged popp a splynt to a street fight, due to his interference in the tag team match at e & a 2gs + 1...i have heard the the mythical holl e would is in talks with mpw's favorite gothic son, to become his valet. will this affect abrith's style at all? we will have to wait and find out...mpw is yet again looking for a home as the house of pain was not able to reach a contract agreement with the mpw front office. word has it that the next event, "deliberate intent" might be taking place at a wharehouse/factory type place. this will definately be a different environment for the guys to fight in...texas toast terry williams looks frighteningly familiar...a number of mpw realted people attended a fear factory concert a few nights ago and it got a huge thumbs up across the board. speaking of which, the first mpw champion, eric the extremist, was spotted at the concert. could he be returning to the scene? i hear that he might be at the next show, but in what capacity? and will he bring lumpy with him? back again real soon with some interesting news on corporal punishment...peace im outta here

6/3/01 We are one week removed from Suvanamongkol, so let's get right into it with the injury report. Stoolie received 2nd degree burns on his right hand, after a spot with Agony went awry, he's out for at least a month and might not be cleared for ...And Justice for Few on 6/30/01, Beautiful Bobby suffered a gash, on the back of his head, that required 7 stitches, Agony was split open on the forehead, from being thrown into a road sign, Devistation was belted in the head with a cane and he could not hear for a few days, 187's hand was sliced open, and No Ego's nose was busted, from a Raider right...Happy Birthday to the newly crowned Little Nutz Champ, Crisis, who turned 14 today...Look for some new blood in MPW soon...The myth known as Holl E Would has challenged Flaco and Beautiful Bobby to a jello/whipped cream match. I'm not sure what to say about that, but if it happens, I guess you could say we pulled a Vince Russo...Look for a mini tournament to find No Ego a partner to hold the MPW Double Nut Tag Championships...Speaking of Tag Champs, Corporal Punishment has been ordered to return to the US, because authorities in Dijbouti found buckets upon buckets of Afghanistan Rhino-Monkey semen, in the Corporals shack, in the small province of Haasharamadaan, in southnorth Dijbouti. As you all know, the Afghanistan Rhino-Monkey is a sacred species found only within one square meter of the world, and this happens to be in Dijbouti. There are only 3 and a half of these lovely animals left in the world, so shame on The corporal for doing this...5 MPW superstars went to the park yesterday. And what did they encounter? Oh my, there were some 14 year olds wrestling around a jungle jim, with the Mary Kate and Ashley Olsen soundtrack blaring, oh yeah it was the NWF...I think I've made my point, 'till next time...

First of all, I must clear things up. The three way dance at Suvanamongkol, between 187, Crisis, and Beautiful Bobby, will be for the Little Nutz title, but the first person to be pinned will not have to retire. That stipulation is a wee bit harsh for these young men trying to make a name for themselves...Contrary to other websites' reports, Howie D is not the owner of Moon Pie Wrestling...Old School Joe Lewis has demanded that his match With No Ego at Suvanamongkol be a 2 out of 3 falls submission match, the decision will be made on the 26th...Is Krazy Kim's MPW Mailbag returning???...A few days ago, a select few of the MPW starz attended Xtreme Radio's Our Big Concert 4. They said it was almost as exciting as Corporal Punishment's debut...The MPW is changing locations once again, it's not sure whether this a permanent change or not, but the guys are excited about moving to a bigger yard...If you would like to buy a car, see Corporal Punishment. If you are a young girl with a great azz, call Ravishing Reggie. If you want Eric "The Fat Penis" Extremist's autograph, check your couch...
Outtie 5000

The 3 way dance @ Suvanamongkol between 187, Beautiful Bobby, and Crisis will go down as follows: the first person to get pinned will have to retire, and the Little Nutz will be up for grabs for the last two men. This is a blockbuster announcement considering that someone will undoubtedly retire, boy the Little Nutz division sure is heating up...Happy Mother's Day to Mrs. Hamm, who by the way has been spending most of its day in legal court, trying to win custody of Sheniquia, seeing how Alabama Man has filed for divorce(more on this story as it develops)...The MPW is in negotiations with the PWA(Pro Wrestling Academy of Las Vegas) to do a show at their school, in a ring. If the deal goes through, this will be the first time MPW superstars have stepped foot in a ring to wrestle, kinda defeats the purpose of BACKYARD wrestling, huh?...The Shoot interview about the NWF, that happened last Saturday night(5/5/01), can be purchased by going to, or by contacting Stoolie, Howie D, Ravishing Reggie, Funny Freddy, Beautiful Bobby and some others had a "round table" discussion on why the NWF sucks so much. Many subjects were covered, for example, why does the NWF use WWF entrance music for their intros? Or why did they make complete asses of themselves at our last show Bizahwataba?...Speaking of NWF, one of their superstars commited bodily harm to Sam Dean's(aka Agony) Chevy pick-up, while filming a match at Bizahwataba. Agony has assured the whole world that if he ever sees this NWF guy *Cord-cough-cough*, he will inflict some bodily harm on him, and that is a shoot...Look for XXXtace to take on yet another newcomer at Suvanamongkol. This newcomer, Devastation, is rumored to be a Black Belt in the martial arts...and last but not least what is this Holl E. Would BS all about? Is this a new superstar on his or her way? I have heard that this person was at Bizahwataba in some capacity. I guess we will just have to wait and find out...

Well since the rumors department has been on hiatus for a while, lets get right into it with some juicy news...Due to his legal battle with General Mills over the name "Captain Crunch", Corporal Punishment has relocated to the Asian province of Dijbouti, where he works in a sweatshop, molding the tips for steel dildos, in his spare time he is found with a cat named Walt, twin ferrets named Cletus & Claude, and a 3-legged midget with rickets and a glass eye...Looks like No Ego, for the time being, will be the MPW Double Nut Tag Champs...due to a conflict of religion, the NWF has gotten the hell out of MPW country(God Bless)...look for Crisis, 1-8-7, and Beautiful Bobby to go at it @ Suvanamongkol in a few weeks. This will be for the Little Nutz and more stips will be added at a later date...sightings of Rob Kong continue to fly in, just look for him at the park or at your local bar(if it's payday)...Bizahwataba was a huge success, with the exception of festering dog shit in the yard(hey it adds flavor to the event)...even though Agony has become one of the "Elite 4" to hold the MPW Fat Nutz Title, Stoolie is still a major contender and will get his rematch at Suvananmongkol...HOLL E. WOULD?...Speaking of drugs, where is Humanities Disease?...Old School Joe Lewis was furious when he heard No Ego used the Old School cross-face on XXXtace. Was this a call out to Old School or just coincidence? Let's just say Joe Lewis might need to bring his trumpet and slam it on No Ego's head to get any attention...As Howie D would say, "So long and goodnight"...

BRUISED ASS 2000 results
Crisis & newcomer Pajama Sam def. Ms Hamm
187 def. Beautiful Bobby after a provoked run-in by Robbie Kong
Old School Joe Lewis def MPW champ Stoolie(in a non-title match)
MPW Free For All featuring:
Beautiful Bobby
Old School Joe Lewis
Pajama Sam
Robbie Kong
Stoolie pinned Robbie Kong to retain the MPW Big Fat Nutz Title, BUT there is more on this story in a moment
Bruised Ass news and tidbits...
Raider was out with a bruised shin, but made his presence felt with a few interferences... Beautiful Bobby made his return, but found himself on the receiving end of a brutal powerbomb through a table, thanks to Robbie Kong... some chick interfered in the Stoolie/Old School match... Robbie Kong has broken ribs, thanks to a Stoolie Splash, and will be out for some time... Where was Poppa Splynt... And now for more on the Fat Nutz title dispute: somewhere in the middle of the match it seemed as if Kong pinned Stoolie, and later on Beautiful Bobby also pinned Stoolie. Both pins were counted to 3, by referee Alabama Man, but were never recognized by Commish Freddy and/or Howie D. We expect to get word from the offices of the Commisioner soon regarding this dispute, and expect it to be settled @ Brawl 2K:Brawl in the Backyard 2000. Now where does this leave Old School Joe Lewis? He expects a title shot due to him defeating Stoolie. We'll just have to wait until Brawl 2K...

Thats all for now...


4/23/00 SUVANAMONGKOL 97 Results

MPW has been invaded!!!(i told you so). The show started off with as many fuck ups as one could imagine, our music tech, DJ Sammy has been suspended without pay, until the MPW execs can come up with suitable retribution...
The EBWF(Extreme Backyard Wrestling Federation) took over the show from the very start. Agony interrupted Howie D's introduction of the first match, then he and his comrades, Pain and Donny Durango(formerly Bad Cobra) ran in at the conclusion of the opening match exposing Mrs. Hamm and Yohannes Bunch'o Cack...
Raider was forced to surrender the Little Nutz Championship to new interim commish Dionisio Lazario, then Raider lost the Really Big Fat Nutz "belt" to Stoolie in a blockbuster match. Raider was severely wounded and cried for hours...
Beautiful Bobby beat Robbie Kong for the vacated Little Nutz Title, rumor is that Robbie Kong is considering retirement...
Stoolie answered Agony's challenge succesfully, and kept the dignity of our company, by defeating Agony in a table match...
Look for hte next MPW show, tentatively named, ...AND JUSTICE FOR FEW to go down on May 27, 2000...

WEEZ OUT...........


Bizawataba results/wrap-up
What can i saw, once again the MPW superstarz deliver a helluva show. The Little Nutz tourney was awesome. W e have a new unified champ, 2 new MPW wrestlers(more on this story later), still no sign of Extremist Eric Guzman, word is that he has been sleeping since Karmageddon. We saw the first of what would turn out as a casket match, in MPW history. Commissioner Funny Freddy, has appointed Flaco Q. Morselchiefsky VIII as Vice Commissioner, while Freddy goes on the road to find new talent. And thats not all folks(this almost sickening!!!) MPW presents Suvanamongkol 2000 Saturday April 22,2000... What the hell does the MPW have in store now?!?!?!?!?

Look for "Dionisio Lazario" to fill the shoes of Commissioner Freddy, as interim commentator, @ SUVANAMONGKOL...

NOW for our breaking story. At Bizawataba, we saw the debut of Ravishing Reggie & Agony, you all know. There is more to this story, says I the master of all rumors. I just dont feel right about these guys. I Have also heard from my followers that these outlaws are part of an outside organization called the EBWF, and that @Suvanamongkol, they will be trying to break the foundation of MPW...just what i've heard, dont take it to the bank yet, just wait and see,but dont say i didnt tell you so...

Oh yeah, 1-8-7 and Beautiful Bobby had a helluva match, the showstealer, great job guys!

Until next time


...Justice Died Here 2/26/00

Wow what an event, so much went down at Justice Died Here. Where do I start???Action packed bouts, our biggest crowd ever, a whopping 20 people, someone even got a piece of 15 year old ass in Stoolie's bathroom!!! Howie D made his long awaited return after his suspension. Flaco fought his last match in the MPW. 187 made his debut in a match with Beautiful Bobby. And in a story you heard about first here on the rumors page, Raider did indeed introduce his long time friend Cannibul(they call themselves Rated X), and they did battle the team of Flackin Beautiful(Flaco and Beautiful Bobby). It was a total train wreck, Mcdonalds was flyin everywhere, tables , chairs, glass.......WOW!!!!!!!

That's all for now, check back later


-I keep getting emails from Raider and his "buddy" about their request for a match in the MPW, i must correct myself. They would like to face Flaco and Beautiful Bobby OR a partner of Flaco's choice. I must stress this point, because im getting sick of getting emails from the little fuckers. LATER...


-Karmageddon went off without any snags, but where were all of the MPW superstars??? "Extremist" Eric Guzman shows up for a brief minute and releases the MPW World Title to Commissioner Funny Freddy, what the hell is this about???

-On that note exactly where were all the superstars? A whopping number of 4 of MPW's superstars were at Karmageddon. So this brings up many questions...has Howie D really been fired? There has been no word as of yet from the office of the commissioner, we'll just have to wait and see at the next MPW event. Where were Beautiful Bobby and Earl Saied? are they afraid of Flaco, hell no. Saied was just getting his hair cut and Bobby was, well lets just say he had prior engagements he had to attend. Willie Quazie and The Rasta Maniac have not legally signed on with the MPW, yet either. TJ the cameraman, has an ass whipping coming to him due to the fact that he dodged his match with Rob Kong, at Karmageddon. So thats the story on the lack of "talent" at Karmageddon...

-We have 2 new MPW champions!!!

-MPW will be in the house at the Static-X concert tomorrow night!!!

-Last but certainly not least...We saw a new face at Karmageddon. His name is Raider, and he defeated Stoolie in his first match, look for this guy to go places in the future of the MPW, well, he already is talking a bunch of shit, and wanting to tag with his long time friend, a mystery partner, who we have not seen yet in the MPW, to take on Flaco and a partner of his choice as well. They better watch out, Flaco is known for pulling some weird shit out of his ass, literally. Look for this one to happen at the next MPW PPV..

That's all for now, i'm the Iceman, later on >:-]


*****UPDATE...01/07/00...KARMAGEDDON 2000 has tentatively been postponed to 01/15/00, due to circumstances beyond management's control, more news will be available when we at the rumors department get it, that's it for now...


*****UPDATE...01/04/00...Stoolie has fractured his right wrist, but nonetheless he will be at KARMAGEDDON this Saturday, and he WILL wrestle with a broken wrist...


Is Stoolie Retiring? This Saturday,1-8-2000, MPW is presenting KARMAGEDDON 2000. There have been rumors out of the Stoolie camp that he may be announcing his retirement this Saturday. Could this be possible? Will Stoolie call it quits after just making his return two months ago???

This Saturday at Karmageddon, we might see some new faces at Stoolie Field. The Rasta Maniac might be debuting, also with another maniac called Willie Quazie. Is someone just blowing smoke up our ass or is it true???

Has Howie D been fired from the MPW, for his actions against Stoolie at Y2Karnage? Did Commissioner Funny Freddy give Howie D his walking papers after reviewing the tape of Y2Karnage? Howie D is definitely in cahoots with Rob Kong for the demise of Stoolie, but Howie D's actions are totally uncalled for and if he has a beef with Stoolie he should get his ass in the yard and settle it the old fashioned way...

How long can Flaco hold on to the Little Nutz Title? With his big mouth and little wrestling ability, can Flaco keep the title in his possession for much longer, or will he lose the title to Rob Kong at Karmageddon?

Thats it from the rumor mill, i'm the Iceman, later on >:-]